DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2016

04

Feb

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

Telling a girl you meet in a bar that you want to listen to how wet her pussy gets…hoping it sounds like an old rubber boot in mud…probably won’t ever get you the chance to listen to how wet her pussy gets…especially if she’s overweight and thus over sensitive thinking you’re mocking her…even though you really just want to hear a pussy that sounds like a rubber boot stuck in the mud….

Honesty…never works out…

Here are some stepLINKS in the Morning….

A Bunch of Random Girls in a Bikini – Yes One Bikini – Yes….
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Dancing Girl Causes a Pile-Up
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Some Chick in Random Blue Bikinis….or is it a Random Chick in a Bikini…
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Willem Dafoe as Marilyn Monroe is Weird
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Old Men Fail on a SeeSaw
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Brad Pitt in Weird Jogging Shorts is Weird…
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Vin Disel Won’t Die
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Punk Kid Turns Soft…
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Gigi Hadid Underboobs
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Red Bull F1 Car VS Rugby Team
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This Could be Your Girlfriend
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Terrifying On Flight Explosion in Somalia Captured on Video
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Girls at the GYm…Beasts…
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2016

03

Feb

stepLINKS of the Day

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You people are all so useless, but why am I reading your statuses and every thought that enters your boring mind….

It’s this blackhole of internet distraction – sucking me into your nonsense….but luckily…I take time out to make girls love me:

I also told a feminist friend of mine that she shouldn’t worry about rape culture because she’s not the kind of girl anyone would want to rape…and she took offense…so I said…”so you want to be the kind of girl who gets raped”….and she got confused…

WHAT ARE YOU DOING DAY 3 of BLACK HISTORY MONTH??

Here are some stepLINKS…

So Much Crazy Booty
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Nick Jonas Moved From Kate Hudson to Lily Collins – AIDS for Everyone….
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Christie Brinkley’s Flashback Bikini Pics
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Helen Mirren is Wasted
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Fast and Furious – 8,9,10,11 Revealed
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If Movies Ended When Someone Says Title….
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There’s a Movie Called Millennials
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Kim K and Hilary Clinton…
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Shark Eats Other Shark
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Kendra Wilkinson’s Gotta Take a Shit
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Pascal Craymer White Panties
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Overrated Actress of the Day
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Gangstas bring Guns to McDonalds Drive Thru…
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Kate Winslet is all For Leo
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Angelina Jolie Hates Selena Gomez
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The Guy in Oasis Hates Adele!!
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Naomi Watt’s House…is Too Nice
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People Share their Run-Ins with the Coppers
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Daisy Lowe – See Through
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Some Dude’s Weird Revenge on his Cheating Ex
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Snowball Machine Gun
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ALpha Shoulder Exercises
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49 Epic Super Bowl Food Displays for Superbowl 50
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Kate Beckinsale Out Shopping
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Madonna Thinks Guy Ritchie is Brainwashing their Son….
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Hot Instagram Girl of the Day….
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10 Little known Nazi Doctors…
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Super Bowl Party Hacks You’re Going to Want to Know About
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Penelope Cruz at a Zoolander Premiere
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Blonde Strips and Masturbate
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Some Tinashe Chick Boring in Some Shoot
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18 Gifs with Unexpected Endings
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Insane People Who Sold Their Bodies for Super Bowl Tickets
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Dakota Johnson Boring for Some Shoot
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Shanina Shaik – Behind the Scenes
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Top 10 Closing SHots of All Time
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Slut of the Day
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Skier Takes a Wrong Turn…
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Natasha Henstridge Tits…
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John Travolta for OJ Simpson….
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Teen Mom Jenelle in a Bikini
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Girls into Sports!
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From stepSMUT!! LINKS BELOW ARE VERY NSFW!
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Lesbian Lunch
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Big Booty Brazilian Booty…
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So Many Slutty Cam Girls Who Get Naked For Free….It’s Addictive…You’ve Been Warned…
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Emma is a Slut….
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1 Guy 1 Mousetrap…..
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Big Tits – Big Amazing Tits…
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Drunk Girl Peeing in a Tent….
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Toothbrush Sex….
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Sammt Braddy Big Tits…
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Stick Fight….
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Naked as Fuck Sluts in Naked Selfies – Naked Selfies of Sluts…
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2016

03

Feb

Kate Upton’s Humping the Air of the Day

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This is pretty disturbing….I mean when you think of Kate Upton as the pig with sloppy tits that she turned herself into…before being mocked by everyone enough that she looked in the mirror and said “I guess my tits aren’t enough for these bastards, I better use my millions to get toned”…

I like to think this is a win for Body Shamers everywhere, and for Kate Upton, because she’s got the audience, she might as well be hot as fuck for them, and embracing her body for the obesity and broad back she was in unacceptable…so let’s just let her hump it out…hump it out…hump it out…

I guess this isn’t as funny as Rihanna only selling 460 copies of her album no one knew she released…which seems like a set up….or a lie…or intentional…obviously…this is Rihanna…

Posted in:Kate Upton|SFW

2016

03

Feb

Chloe Moretz at the Pool with a White Guy of the Day

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When looking at Chloe Moretz in her bikini photohsoot with herself on vacation in Mexico, where she’s integrated some white guy to distract from the recent gossip that she was fucking Chance the Rapper…I am forced to wonder one very important thing about her 18 year old existence and that is…what is the biggest thing besides a dick that she’s put inside her vagina…since turning 18, obviously…perverts….

She’s boring, I wonder what shade her asshole is…

That’s all for now…stay tuned more insight from me…

Posted in:Chloe Moretz|SFW

2016

03

Feb

Alba’s Mouth for the Necrophiliac Rape Fetishists of the Day

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If you focus on the first 5 seconds of this video, you can imagine that Jessica Alba is dead, we call it DEADFACE – which is conveniently the only way you’ll every get your dick close to her and the chances of you working the morgue her corpse will be at is slim to none…so take it in necrophiliacs, this marketing puppet and her dead face, half open mouth is all you need for what I assume is one of your more normal fantasies in your life filled with weirdness…

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2016

03

Feb

Fat Shannon Doherty Ass for Old Times of the Day

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Shannon Doherty is old as fuck. I guess she didn’t get the Botox memo that all the other celebrities get into at the age of 18….Maybe it’s because she doesn’t work anymore…it was 90210 in the 90s and that’s pretty much it, throw in the towel, live off the land, go back to her roots….of before she was a super famous bitch on a super famous show…we call that irrelevance…aged irrelevance…but I’ll still loook at her ass in leggings because aged irrelevance is my porn…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Shannon Doherty

2016

03

Feb

Alessandra Ambrosio Whores Out for Shoes of the DAy

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Alessandra Ambrosio is too old for this kind of behavior…sure she’s the original Victoria’s Secret model from Brazil…I mean besides 60% of the other models they’ve used from Brazil…but she’s still too old for this model shit…

I may not be into Alessandra Ambrosio, but I do find it interesting that as a Brazilian, there is a 92% chance that she’s got a dick and that her kids she had as a good Catholic girl were bought in some Brazilian village…with Victoria’s Secret money….I mean if that was the case, it’d make her more interesting….than her breast implants do…

I guess this one’s for the foot fetishists – they love all feet…

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

2016

03

Feb

Selena Gomez Sluts Up for W Magazine of the Day

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Steven Klein is the photographer behind this Selena Gomez on the beach, in bikini, pushing her tits together…or as I like to call her – Dying of Lupus – possibly getting Chemotherapy as she likes to tell people….maybe even in these pics…because that’s the level of extreme her Chemo is…you know the kind that doesn’t make you feel sick, call in sick and allows you to drink and party like you’re not even sick…but when said…sounds so intense, scary….dramatic…

I think he’s trolling us, because he went so aggressive on the filters or coloring he did in the pics, it’s gotta be his artistic prank on us all saying, fuck you instagram for replacing our work, our lives, our jobs…you know a parody, a shut the fuck up, because he’s a huge photographer and knows how to take a pic…

This is definitely his fuck you to the industry, and what better way than to use Selena Gomez in a bikini to make people mad…

It’s like chill the fuck out on this filtering…we want nice images not fucking clown colors…it’s annoying…but the world fucking loves the shitty cartoon-like coloring…so he’ll give us fucking filters…which in and of itself is substantially more interesting that this bottom feeder Selena Gomez in a bikini…trying to be slutty.

Other than that, it’s a great fucking shoot…best of the year…other than the filters that are on purpose and kind of funny and I guess other than Selena, it has a vibe of authenticity, especially with the paparazzi in the background of one of the pics…more real, so we know it’s a fashion shoot and it feels like a Behind the Scenes, which is where the internet is taking us…to one giant documentary of each other…rather than fake bullshit staged crappy commercial stock image looking bullshit pictures with faces beautified so hard bitch looks like a cartoon….they break the fourth wall…so I dig it…because I prefer real…even with one of the most fake of bitches…but I don’t dick it…because I don’t want lupus dick…

Posted in:Selena Gomez|SFW

2016

03

Feb

Kendall Jenner Sluts Up for Love Magazine of the Day

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I guess Kendall Jenner is in Love Magazine again. I figure they just did a photoshoot with all the girls from their Advent Calendar last fall, that they’ll release over the year in their magazine, because why bother coordinating with these people when you get them for a day to do the one cool thing the magazine does every year….

So get the social media whore to show up, milk the social media whore, feed into her rich kid ego, and hopefully she’ll plug you on social media so your company gets more followers and becomes higher profile..

That’s the only reason people are working with her, she’s not that hot, I can’t imagine she’s that good, because everything she does is shit, but peeople follow her bullshit…so latch the fuck onto it when you can like Love Magazine is doing….it’s good for business…some young spoiled rich kid…overrated slut is good for fucking business.

What a joke..

There were other garbage overrated fame whore trash that the media likes – and that I think should be taken out back and shot – in the form of Gigi Hadid never too far from Kendall, Selena Gomez never too far from dying of Lupus and Emily Rat-Cow never too far from doing any media to remind people she happened…cuz she’s done…

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW

2016

03

Feb

Candice Swanepoel Still Does Victoria’s Secret of the Day

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Candice Swanepoel still does Victoria’s Secret, it’s really all she fucking knows. It’s the only job she’s really had, and since they saved her from South AFrican black crimes against racist slave driving white people, and HIV…so much HIV….but giving her a work Visa and celebrity…she owes it to them…

She’s currently engaged, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t fucked countless rich dudes while dating her gay looking fiance…she’s pushing 30…and still has a rocking fucking body..but I still find her totally fucking boring….

We live in a world that being hot and half naked is enough to get noticed, followed or a like…but to really have impact…bitch needs a personality…or maybe I’m just low testosterone and not enough of a caveman to think “girls are just pussy, this girl is good pussy, even if this pussy is diseased, I’ll conquer it like a fucking primate”….and I’m all sensitive and shit, thinking “please do something more than the same fucking thing you’ve always done – 9 years later”….because I can just cross reference those pics, when she was young and better…why would I want to look at her at 30 doing it…when I have access to her youth…ya know…I know..

But then again, Victoria’s Secret, like everything have taken a cue from instagram and made their traditionally typical, the exact same shoots, for the same product shoots, more snapshot feelin’ and real…I mean bitch is actually smiling and having fun…weird..

The “Easter Egg” in these pics is the one with her wrinkled faceand double CHIN…just how we like our models…