DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

10

Sep

Stefani Sober for Elle Turkey of the Day

Her name is Stefani Sober and I only like her because I am never Sober and she’d be something that I guess the media would want me to be, and not just because she’s a hot skinny model, that is fat shaming me just by existing, giving me unrealistic goals and body image issues, but also because she’s hot, and a reminder that I don’t get to have sex with things like this, possibly because I’m not sober and being drunk…makes me do very disgusting things…that claim they are woman…but I’m not too sure because I just close my eyes and go for it…

I just figure as Drunkenstepfather….Sober is my soul mate in an opposites attract situation….But that could just be the delusions of alcohol withdrawal and living on the internet the last 2 decades…

Sober…such a beautiful thing….even when drunk…

Here she is for Elle Turkey…because I love Turkey…

Here are some instagram pics…because I am now stalking her…because we’re meant to be…

Posted in:SFW|Stefani Sober

2015

10

Sep

Jessica Simpson’s Tits Selling Garbage of the Day

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Jessica Simpson known for her huge tits, still has her huge tits, despite having lost a ton of weight based on a weight watcher’s contract, back when all she’d do is eat…

She even did some family planning around that contract, because if she was pregnant, they couldn’t demand their millions of dollars back…

I guess she’s also known for her stupid Walmart brand clothing line for the masses, the Christians who make no money, but are okay with a shitty life thanks to God…you know the people you want to sell product to, because they’ll buy into anything…

Here she is talking…on Fallon…about her kids….to bring you down from…”OMG TITS”….we call this the video castration….because a woman talking about her kids, and not her tits, is a woman I have zero interest in listening to, but I’ll still stare at her tits.

If you look past her box, and below her gunt, you can see her cameltoe…

TO SEE PICS OF HER CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|SFW

2015

10

Sep

Miley Cyrus Cake Picture of the Day

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Miley Cyrus was celebrating her birthday, or her friend’s birthday, or knowing Miley, one of her attempts at a high concept, porny, Tumblr selfie shoot, as part of her “performance” art and branding, that makes people like me think, “At least she’s not Taylor Swift”….while playing the media in what I call “Just being Miley”…

Yes, it’s all a fabricated lie. but it’s half naked, and really, is anything really real anymore anyway?

I think life is just a series of me interacting with my computer in my shithole I call home…

It’s all a fucking fantasy, so as long as it’s some overpaid pop bitch in a bikini on all fours covered in cake, I’m ok with the lies…

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|SFW

2015

10

Sep

Valeriya Volkova’s Amazing of the day

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Valeriya Volkova,is some amazing Russian / Israeli living in Spain model that I wish I could have bought off the mail order bride site, but she had her Jewish card to escape communism as a citizen of Israel, and that made her unaffordable…

Her instagram is HERE reminds me that some models are just so fashionable…that I can jerk off to them…even when they are safe for work…but barely…

Her shoot by JEAN PIERROT , for Treats Magazine reminds me that I can also jerk off to her fashion photoshoots, because tits like that, pouring water on herself, is the perfect level of porn…

It also reminds me how expensive she would be to buy now, since Treats magazine is pretty much occupied by Ryan Seacrest, his recruiting ground for broke girls he can feed drugs to for sex…(that’s the story I heard)….

Who cares about Ryan Secrest and Treats, as long as their hustle is finding girls like this for you to see awesome tits…in ways the person who created the Kardashians, someone you’d think was the devil, is redeeeming himself with tits…

Posted in:Valeriya Volkova

2015

10

Sep

Naked Guy at a Music Festival and Other Videos of the Day

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Naked Jay Walker

Suicidal Guy Waits Too Long for Suicide and the Rescue Team Ruin his Plan

Motorbike Almost Flips a Car…

Bulldog Falls Asleep While Standing

Little Kid Bean Bag Fail

Inmate Stuck in Escape Tunnel

People Attack Man Who Stabbed His Girlfriend in a Mall

Nanny Abusing Baby…

Can’t Taze a Dude on Drugs…

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2015

10

Sep

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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I speak in prayers…but not really, I just like telling crazy Religious people that religion is TV 2000 years before humans knew how to invent a TV because they were just that primitive and the fact that they buy into it like it is gospel, is like people 2000 years from now, with all their technology, thinking Kim K’s selfie book was our Gospel…

I mean logic says there in no god…Aliens maybe…but no god…so I don’t even know why people debate this with people, when clearly…it’s like trying to rationalize with a homeless person on drugs…it’s just irrational..

All I see on Faebook is bullshit…Gay marriage, Kim Davis the Whore, bullshit…

The face that most of America are this redneck, uneducated, bible thumping, crazy people…is what’s really terrifying…

Here are some stepLINKS in the morning….at noon…

How to Fuck Over your Whore Wife
CLICK HERE

Dogs Go Swimming…
CLICK HERE

Girls in Yoga Pants
CLICK HERE

Bikini a Day girls in a Bikini
CLICK HERE

Charissa Little Slutty for Water
CLICK HERE

Weird Fucking Car Accident…
CLICK HERE

Lisa Opie Bikini Pic
CLICK HERE

Wet Girls!
CLICK HERE

Jon Hamm Wanted Kids..>So He Dumped His Wife
CLICK HERE

Jessica Simpson GUnt
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS

2015

09

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

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The most fascinating thing that happened to me was following a chubby girl in the smallest and tightest shorts of all time..her ass was hanging out of the shit….probably a hipster, I mean they are all fucking hipsters these days, it’s the mainstream…the drug fueled, misimformed, anti corporate while in designer clothes, vegan who eats McDonalds when drunk because they “Legit Literally Can’t”….and she was talking about her period art and how period blood isn’t gross..

To which I say…I wouldn’t order it on the menu at the organ cold press juice bar…

Why is everyone under 25 around me talking about their periods…this is day 2 of period talk…must be a feminist trend…

Here are some stepLINKS…

CLICK HERE

Katy Perry on All Fours for Taylor Swift
CLICK HERE

Cailin Russo’s Nipples
CLICK HERE

Reality Star Virgin
CLICK HERE

GQ Men of the Year Awards Erotica
CLICK HERE

Wet Girls!
CLICK HERE

Colbert’s Dance is Fucking Weird
CLICK HERE

Weed Smoker in Lingerie
CLICK HERE

Taylor Swift’s Got a Slutty Pic with Calvin Harris Out there For Sale
CLICK HERE

Vanessa Hudgens at an Event Doing the Hippie Shit
CLICK HERE

Cameron Diaz is Pregnant with Benji Madden’s Twins…
CLICK HERE

Jenna Jenovich in a Green Bikini
CLICK HERE

Gorilla Checking Out Gorillas on an Iphone
CLICK HERE

Craziest Thigh Gap Ever…Must be Fake..
CLICK HERE

Girls with Blunts
CLICK HERE

Caitlin Jenner is Not Scared of Men’s Jail
CLICK HERE

Downhill Skateboarding at 70 MPH
CLICK HERE

Tom Brady and Gisele are Holding Hands…
CLICK HERE

Laura Whitmore’s Panty Flash
CLICK HERE

Maitland Ward is So Strange While Half Naked
CLICK HERE

Chinese People are Pooping on Tawainese Lawns…What?
CLICK HERE

Victoria Justice in Cosmo
CLICK HERE

COSPLAY!
CLICK HERE

Man Finds 200 LBS of Weed
CLICK HERE

Lucy Mecklenburgh’s Squatting
CLICK HERE

Taylor Swift in a Crop TOp
CLICK HERE

Kylie Jenner’s Probably Fake Tits in a Sports Bra
CLICK HERE

Kylie Jenner Fills Up her Fitness Gear
CLICK HERE

10 Dumb Reasons to Get Arrested
CLICK HERE

Girls Who Are Into Sports Teams
CLICK HERE

Bikini a Day Tits
CLICK HERE

People are Loving Katy Perry’s Hand Prints
CLICK HERE

Farrah Abraham Losing Her Shit…
CLICK HERE

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From stepSMUT!! LINKS BELOW ARE VERY NSFW!
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These Girls Are the Best Thing Ever….
CLICK HERE

Solid “Stop the Robber”..in South Africa
CLICK HERE

Dillion Harper’s Laundromat Titties
CLICK HERE

This Greek Slut is the Best
CLICK HERE

Top 5 Lesbian Scenes in Mainstream Movies…
CLICK HERE

Topless Stretching and Push Ups
CLICK HERE

Naked Chick and her Great Hat
CLICK HERE

Bitch on a Train!
CLICK HERE

Disgusting Toothbrush Video of the Day
CLICK HERE

Naughty Everyday Girls Being Naughty and Loving it When you Watch…for free..perverts everywhere
CLICK HERE

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Posted in:stepLINKS

2015

09

Sep

Beyonce in Flaunt Magazine is as Hot as she Can Be of the Day

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FLAUNT MAGAZINE is back….

I am not sure they ever went away, but I don’t remember hearing about them in the last couple of years and I guess I’m not the target market so what the fuck do I know, other than that their latest issue is coming at you harder than you’ll possibly cum to the pics they took of Beyonce…

I assume that they are showing the world that they can be contenders in the “break the internet” movement that magazines have taken on with their photoshoots…

Whether it’s Paper Magazine with Kim Kardashian’s fake ass balancing a Champagne glass, or Interview Magazine releasing facetime sexting pics of Miley pretty much masturbating, to everything in between…it’s kind of the way shit works now…

Only this time, It’s Beyonce, who amazes me, not because I’m a gay dude waiting outside her concert screaming her name hoping she hears me because I feel she’s my spirit animal, and that ever since Say My Name…I’ve been saying her name…because I related to independent women…

She amazes me because at 40, with child, she’s managed to make herself pretty much hotter than she’s ever been, which isn’t really that hot, but still competitive with her competion…Rihanna…who makes Jay Z…more money than Beyonce ever has…unless they sell their kid to the industry…which I assume they will because why not…

So Beyonce should thank FLAUNT MAGAZINE for making her matter…even though according to Beyonce she’s always and will always matter, you get that?

No I haven’t gone soft, I am always soft, and no, I don’t think Beyonce is ever hot and is always the worst….I’m just saying better than usually…looking on the bright side….she’s grabbing her mom tits in a pool…

Check out FLAUNT for more pics…it’s a 500 page issue with a ton of people in it…. HERE

Posted in:Beyonce|SFW

2015

09

Sep

Rihanna’s See Through Top of the Day

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Rihanna is still wearing see through lingerie tops…so that the world can see her nipples that aren’t supposed to be sexualized…then why are you jerking off to them…oh right because nipples like many things…including but not limited to legs…hands and mouths…assholes…and pussy….can be used for both sexual and non sexual things…

It’s like “My nippples feed babies and men can show their nipples, so stop getting turned on my tits” #freethenipple…

When I’m thinking “you vagina makes babies, when not having period, your asshole shits, your mouth eats and talks and your hand does a lot more than handjobs, yet when I look at them it’s all I see, so keep showing them”…

I guess there was a time when doing these nipple stunts would make the paparazzi pics unpublishable…but now the world has come to their senses and post that shit…pretty much making what I do absolutely obsolete…but I’ll still do it…because why not..

Here’s some pics of her in a Black Dress CLICK HERE

Posted in:Rihanna

2015

09

Sep

Katy Perry on All Fours of the Day

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The internet is freaking out because Katy Perry got her handprints in what I assume is the hollywood walk of fame, because I guess as an LA party girl, who probably walked Hollywood BLVD with her girls buying their silly raver outfits for their club nights, it’s probably a big deal, worth the price they charged her for it, because now, she’s eternal and can inspire other mainstream raver chicks to fuck the right dude in the right band to introduce her to the right people as that is how it pretty much happens…

I mean, I get the whole tits busting out of her top, that she knew was going to be the position she’d be in, and probably why she wore the dress…because everyone give this old lady popster with some of the worst music more attention on her big day! It cost her money…now notice…

I don’t think Katy Perry is a horrible person, I think she’s a horrible performer and don’t get her, but feel sorry for her knowing that no one actually respects her or her music and only care because she’s famous…if she wasn’t famous, she’d just be the weirdo at the club….

That said, your instagram and facebook must be blowing up with Burning man pictures, as they “Burners are back”…and Katy Perry was a “Burner” this weekend and she posted one of her Mad Max, creepy in the desert not dessert outfits, and all I can see is her short thick legs…

To See the Rest of the Pics of the Event CLICK HERE

Posted in:Katy Perry|SFW