I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2014

22

Aug

Jessica Hart’s In GQ of the Day

Jessica Hart is a gap toothed, Australian model with big tits who dates Billionaire Stavros, who has likely given her Paris Hilton strain of Herpes, along with all the other girls he allegedly banged, but who I’m not convinced he banged, because he’s so next level rich, that he knows that these girls are just hookers.

He is a legit billionaire, there’s just no way to really trust a girl’s intentions when you come with the first class 5 star life. So you just keep them around like a harem of hookers, but don’t call them hookers, call them models, since models are much more respectable in their “Pay me for sex if you have a yacht” hustle.

I’m not hating, I like her tits. Tits that I guess by Google Ad standards make GQ pornographers. In America, nipples are bad. Yet people still advertise on GQ, even with the nipples…so maybe I just do things wrong, clearly, as I sit here on my couch with the only tits around are mine – and they aren’t hot at all.

That’s all I have to say about gappy tits and her boyfriend she’s trying to marry for obvious reasons – while she’s half naked for a mainstream men’s mag…

Posted in:Jessica Hart

2014

22

Aug

Emily Ratajkowski Big Tits for Ocean Drive of the Day

Emily Ratajkowski is in Ocean Drive and I guess she is pretending to be a Fashion model, and for some reason people are buying into it.

She’s short, she’s busty, she’s got very little business being a fashion model, but she’s posing here like she is one, and not the busy nude model she was just last year.

I guess she’s proving that models are a product of internet fame, and not so much weight, size or measurements….and any average faced girl can make it – so long as she shows her tits to the right person.

I am not hating on Emily Ratajkowski even if I call her EM Rat Cow. I like what she’s doing to girls everywhere by giving them the idea of getting naked and the hope that it will convert for them like it did with her…It’s like one music video created this and now she exists…and I guess the good news is that she’s got the tits that got her here in the first place…

Here are the pics.

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski

2014

22

Aug

Genevieve Morton Pretending to Workout is the Joke of the Day

I mean come on Genevieve Morton, we get that you’re trying to go famous and use social media to get there, but there are some things fat girls can’t fool us with, because of them being fat and all….like fitness.

She can polarize her career, her existence, shoot from the right angles, pretend to be famous and relevant, even cast movies from sucking producer dick, or post pics from expensive and fancy places from sucking rich dude who like model dick…..

But the one thing she can’t do is pretend to be in shape….

We get it – she was the Kate Upton who never was…but she’s totally not owning that….and pulling some other bullshit like this….

I guess in ways it is kinda funny…but not that funny…Here’s her caption, what a joker.


#fitnessfriday working out my core today ???? mainly a combination of crunches and plank if you have any tips let me know ???? #genevievemortonfitness

Posted in:Genevieve Morton

2014

22

Aug

Victoria Beckham Ice Bucket Challenge of the Day

Victoria Beckham did the ice bucket challenge…

Now, I wish the ice bucket challenge was just the ice challenge where celebrities did as much meth as possible and the one who comes closest to death wins without dying wins….and all the ones who accidentally die would make us all winners…win win win – I would donate to that charity.

That said, seeing a small Beckham being taken out by ice water is pretty fucking jokes…but then again – so is people dumping ice on themselves for a charity….

I’ll still think about masturbating to it, but I think about masturbating to everything, I just don’t…

Posted in:Victoria Beckham

2014

22

Aug

Hilary Duff in a Bikini of the Day

Here is some Hilary Duff in a bikini for instagram because instagram is the place where girls can be attention seeking whores under the pretence that it is just to show off how great they are…their lives are…their bodies are…their bikinis are…because social media is a fucking lie where all these idiots try to show off…and I am okay with these bikini pics of everyone and anyone in bikinis…because I am a pervert…even with pics like this that are an attempt at “artistic”…and almost impossible to masturbate to, unless you’re a professional…and you are…

Posted in:Hilary Duff

2014

22

Aug

Mila Kunis Sucking Spoons of the Day

Here is Mila Kunis showing everyone what it is like to be pregnant and miserable, where your only happiness comes from getting ice cream and being able to eat whatever the fuck you want, even though it doesn’t take away the sads of how wrecked her little kutcher is going to look when her little kutcher crawls out and pollutes the entire world….

Or maybe she’s showing girls that it’s better to have an oral fixation, than a cum in my uterus because I am over 30 and need a baby now before it is too late and I might as well do it with my old friend and billionaire I used to fuck, because he gets me…

Either way, pregnant girls…not hot…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Mila Kunis

2014

22

Aug

Cara Delevingne Walks and the Paparazzi Care of the Day

Cara Delevingne is relevant now, the American paparazzi follow her…and care about what she’s tonguing.

The only thing I see is a Socialite, rich kid, who partied with the right people, and who got invited to the Chanel warehouse sale where Karl Lagerfeld said “hey why don’t you model for me”…to which she did and now she exists…

It’s like right party, right place, right friends and the public confuse her for being relevant, or even being the most relevant “it” girl around, when she’s probably just pretty fucking annoying…

You know that all this fame has gone to her head, and that she’s probably the worst human to ever be around…I mean – unless she’s letting you watch her tongue a vagina in a VIP exclusive yacht because she so wild and hip…

Posted in:Uncategorized

2014

22

Aug

Vanessa Hudgens in Some Ill Fitting Shorts of the Day

Vanessa Hudgens is not wearing the shorts a girl her age should be wearing. I guess she hasn’t gone out in public and seen that no girl wears shorts like these. These are more something some Parisian looking, possibly homo man on his way to get ice cream after a long jog and there’s really very little hot about that…

If I don’t see ass cheek or camel toe, then the shorts aren’t shorts…but rather they are pants..horrible horrible pants…

To See The Rest of The Pics CLICK HERE

Posted in:Vanessa Hudgens

2014

22

Aug

Sarah Jessica Parker’s Thigh Gap of the Day

Uggghhhh…

Sarah Jessica Parker thigh gap was not anything I wanted to fuck with in the 90s when she was used as the accessible “fashionable” monster for girls to idolize and think and that guys thought was hot due to being misinformed…

I didn’t get why she was the hot Sex and the City hero, that girls everywhere wanted to idolize, and did idolize and in turn became miserable with their choices when they hit 40 and had no kids – but herpes…lots of herpes…and I sure as hell don’t find her thigh gap anything I want to talk about now…but I am sucked in and can’t turn back now..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Sarah Jessica Parker

2014

22

Aug

Lighthouse Picture of the Day

Nice lighthouse…I am always into pretty scenic shots, you know artistic landscapes, as long as there is a bikini ass in them…

Obnoxious faux artist photographers like to take pics of these landscapes and puppies on their instagram so that girls don’t think they are creepers even though any asshole who posts pics of landscapes or puppies on his instagram, claiming to be a photographer, is just doing that shit to get girls in his studio and trap them like Terry Richardson, who has turned to a life of posting pics of his travels rather than sluts on his blog, because that’s how you maintain an image…

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Posted in:Anastasia Ashley