DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

24

Jan

Adriana Lima for Harper’s Bazaar Spain of the Day

I am going to assume that this is an old shoot of underwear model Adriana Lima…because she’s looking long, lean and toned…and her religious ass, has had a bunch of babies and usually looks more bloated than this…in a trying to maximize and live out her contract…but struggling to pull it off…all thanks to her love of God and Catholicism, that she believes god sent her those babies, even though the rest of us know it’s just natural science, and instead of aborting it thanks to modern science, she kept it, aging her and making her look more bloated than this 99 percent of the time….but today, for Harper’s Bazaar Spain…she looks good.

Posted in:Adriana Lima

2014

24

Jan

Do Not Sign This Petition to Deport Justin Bieber of the Day

No Comments »

CANADA DOESN’T WANT HIM BACK, WE GAVE HIM TO USHER FOR A REASON ….

Sure, I agree that the little twat deserves to be deported like other Visa holders and Greencard holders who committed lesser crimes. I agree he is a horrible influence on the youth…and when he is in the States he has a bigger reach and thus affects the kids in Canada too…it’s a trickle down effect…however..we still don’t want him back…dead maybe…but not back…so… DO NOT SIGN THIS PETITION …

Posted in:Justin Bieber

2014

24

Jan

Irina Shayk Not As Good when Not Photoshopped but Still Good in a Thong Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Irina Shayk is pretty much the best model circulating the bikini model I want to fuck industry lately…partially because she’s scammed her way to the top from the mean streets of her cold water flat in Russia…probably through any means possible..from hooking…to sucking dick…to pretending to suck dick for athletes who linked her up with SI…but even if she’s had work done she looks fucking good…and I guess she’s on her PR trip to help the people at SI choose her as the cover of next month’s issue over EMRATA…by showing her ass that despite not being photoshopped…still looks round enough for me to dig into…even if it’s not the roundest out there…when compared to everything else she offers..it’s pretty fucking perfect enough for you to masturbate to…

I remain…a fan of this babe…if only I coulda bought her off the internet before all this fame…another example of me failing at life…It happens daily…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Irina Shayk

2014

24

Jan

Danielle Knudson is Good for GUESS of the Day

No Comments »

I have no idea who Danielle Knudson but I do know who Guess is…they are the people who brought the world Anna Nicole Smith..amongst other busty models who don’t matter because they are just shadows of relevant when compared to Anna Nicole Smith…not because they are less famous than her…but because even when dead that bitch is so fat she blocks them all out…

That said, Danielle Knudson, not quite fat like Anna Nicole…but still showing off tits and looking’ good enough for me to google later on…if I remember…because it’s almost lunch time…on a friday and that means who gives a fuck about Danielle Knudson …I want to get free buffet at the strip club time…

Posted in:Danielle Knudson

2014

24

Jan

Izabel Goulart Workout Video of the Day

No Comments »

When it comes to Izaebel Goulart, even the not very sexy videos of her working out are hot as fuck…you know the ones where her ass exercises aren’t in HD, wearing skimpy shorts and that I can barely make out every crevice, fold and inch of her body…but it’s still nice to see her doing long skinny leg moves…in an up and down motion…because it helps me imagine my face being her sweat soaked panties…that is if she’s even wearing panties…I’m in love…and you should be too…especially if you’re a fat girl…use this to motivate you to start starving for male attention…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

24

Jan

Vanessa Hudgens in NYLON Of the Day

No Comments »

Hairy little Disney Troll who you may not really understand why she gets work, unless you’re a producer and figure she’s been trained by Disney, she’s used to working for free and sucking dick to be the chosen one amongst many…all while new girls ware way bigger risks…who you may remember from leaking nude pics of her unshaven self, that would have been hot to a bush lover like me, if I knew that that wasn’t her troll pussy’s 5 o’clock shadow…because that’s how life is for hairy little monkeys like Vanessa Hudgens..

Well she’s in this issue of Nylon, hipster mag turned tween girl mag, and she looks good enough for me…but then again so does most average at best things…I mean so does most rotting mouth, obese yet eager things…I am a pretty easy audience…

Posted in:Vanessa Hudgens

2014

24

Jan

Candice Swanepoel’s Sandy Ass of the Day

No Comments »

My favorite thing about sad covered asses on the beach is the idea of it being a girl who just accidentally shit herself because she’s love control of her bowels from all the anal sex she’s been having…and not because of food poisoning, because food poising isn’t as fun the think about as anal…especially when we are talking about a Victoria’s Secret model money making ass that is borderline perfect…otherwise it wouldn’t get paid to wear underwear…

Her name is Candice Swanepoel, she’s losing her appeal a bit, but I’m still down…and since this is my site, I guess that’s all that matters.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

24

Jan

Throwback Miley Cyrus Body Painted of the DAy

No Comments »

Miley Cyrus may be an attention seeking, fabricated pile of bullshit, just trying to find some legitimacy in her spoiled brat, sheltered life…and she’s doing that by getting half naked…and more importantly she may look like Justin Bieber…

But I can always fuck with some pics of her body painted, even if you can’t see her spread asshole, and even if body painting is the cheesiest fucking thing you can do to a girl you want to see naked…but who doesn’t want to just be naked…because naked is frowned upon and gets your videos flagged, while body paint, that she’s almost like clothes…who cares…here are the pics…that are old as fuck and that I shouldn’t be wasting my time on…when I can just look at her nipples, that aren’t that great, from all her other cries for attention…

Posted in:Miley Cyrus

2014

24

Jan

Montreal Homeless Man Fight of the Day

No Comments »

Montreal is a horrible place that reminds anyone who visits of war torn eastern Europe…it’s like some siberian outpost filled with people who remember how great it was in the 70s and don’t realize the rest of the world has moved on. It has shitty politicians with shitty agendas that brainwash the french to hate the english…but it does have great homeless people…a lot are drunken inuits…

And I think that it’s always fun when I see my fellow drunken homeless people from the park making huge moves like getting themselves on the internet for fighting while drunk….

The funniest thing in all this is that I know the inuit bitch kicking the motherfucker in the head and hitting him with the piece of wood, I see her pretty much every fucking day and I have been offered sex from her for very affordable prices…

I have also seen her getting beat up by her boyfriend…and really the whole thing is so fucking ghetto, how can you not love every second of it…

Posted in:Videos

2014

24

Jan

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

No Comments »

My wife is an amazing creature, and not in a good way…like this bitch is not saving the fucking world or anything, she’s just amazing because she can sit for 12 hours on the couch without moving…but because for a woman who can’t wipe her own ass she manages to be pretty fucking capable when it comes to dealing with her food addiction…I mean this bitch will get out of bed at 4 am and manage to walk to the closest 24 hour convenience store to buy 1000s of calories of shit to eat before coming home and falling back to sleep…if only there was an obstacle course along the way…maybe she wouldn’t be 1000 pounds…leading to my new sports league…obesity olympics….where the trophy at the end of the athletic task is a bag of doritos and ice cream…these motherfuckers will work for the shit…

Bendy Girls
GO

Joanna Krupa and Denise Richards Dyking Out
GO

John Ham Cock
GO

Mini Matchstick Gun
GO

Super Bowel – Party Platters
GO

1000s of Girls Masturbating for You
GO

13 Popular Cars from TV Shows
GO

Troy Barnes GIS to Get you Through the 5 Stages of Grief
GO

Some Pretty Awful GIFs
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS