DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2013

28

May

Shanina Shaik in Swimsuit for Summer Splash of the Day

Here is model Shanina Shaik, who has modeled for Victoria’s Secret, which means she’s an actual model, because Victoria’s Secret is the litmus test as to whether a girl is actually a model, or just a try hard, posing for other companies, trying to make as many moves as possible, before the scouts at Victoria’s Secret scoop her up, trap her, abduct her and make her their own to do whatever they want with….but I guess none of that really matters because here she is modeling for some other company I’ve never heard of, riding on the Victoria’s Secret stamp of approval Shanina’s got, and milking her in some boring pics and videos that I am going to post, because models are usually not fat and I like that.

Here’s the video….

Posted in:Shanina Shaik

2013

28

May

Woman Riding a Manatee of the Day

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I kinda wish that I got arrested every time my wife tried to make me mount her manatee sized ass.

This is some white trash free dolphin ride shit for those who can’t afford to be raped by assholes who abuse captive dolphins for white people entertainment.

It’s like watching getting kids swimming on a hot summer day in a roasting pan.

I guess what it comes down to is, what do you expect, this happened in Florida, and Florida doesn’t attract winners, ever…

This video reminds me of the Kim Kardashian sex tape.

Posted in:Videos

2013

28

May

Jenna Jonathan is the Glamour Model of the Day

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Jenna Jonathan is on some MTV UK show called The Valleys, that I assume is their version of Jersey Shore….and this bitch is the Snooki, only unlike Snooki, who wanted to be a profession pasta eating pig to fit in with the real Italians, this one wants to be a Glamour model….

Her fake tits inspired by her idol Katie Price. They claim she’s got a Law Degree…and luckily for her it is all paying off for her…I mean if you’re a broken male attention seeking slut who had a fucked up childhood cuz daddy either touched her too much or too little, you might as well be getting in magazines, rather than stripclubs or other more dangerous places….this here is far more Glamourous….

Lucky for her guys have no standards, see tits and get excited, it is all it takes for them. I have facebook, I see what kinds of gremlins some of you fuck. They make this Jenna Jonathan, who finally made her dreams come true and all it took was getting topless, look like a Goddess….

It’s depressing but we gotta love these basic girls with basic dreams doing basic things when those things are topless.

Posted in:Jenna Jonathan|NSFW

2013

28

May

Tulisa Contostavlos Fat Burnt Ass in Her Bikini of the Day

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My favorite thing about Tulisa Contostavlos, despite popular belief, is not her cellulite ridden ass, that she has managed to shrink down a little but that is still cellulite ridden….

I hate cellulite, it repulses me and I don’t fuck with girls who have it, probably part of the reason why I only fuck meth addicts…the other part of the reason being how affordable they are, and how tasty their scabs are…..

My favorite thing about Tulisa is her dirty blow job video she released a few years ago when she was a “rapper” and looking for attention that she got from Simon Cowell, cuz he could relate and appreciate her dick sucking moves, as he used a lot of the same ones on Seacrest OUT.

It’s too bad that her machine got it erased from the internet, before landing her on TV, because I think it’d be a nice support to justify why I’m posting her bikini pics…

Not that I need to justify shit, this is my site, get out.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Tulisa Contostavlos

2013

28

May

Gigi Hadid Hard Nipples at a Photoshoot of the Day

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Gigi Hadid is a model I have never done any posts on, but who is apparently the Guess model, like a modern day Anna Nicole Smith, without the fake whore tits and 80 year old Old Tycoon john she’s hooking for….because after hours and hours of research…or what felt like hours and hours of research…cuz I hate research….it turns out that despite her Arab sounding name, she’s from Malibu, she’s a Taurus, her agency is IMG, who also represent a lot of the Victoria’s Secret models, which means next step for her may be some Victoria’s Secret shit, just as soon as she’s done practicing having pics of her nipples taken for us to take in, before Victoria’s Secret and their evil empire try to erase them…in some Angelina Jolie titty amputation ritual they do to all their models…

No idea where this shoot is or what it is for, just glad it happened…and I’m also glad she’s not Kate Upton.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Gigi Hadid

2013

28

May

Paris Hilton Modeling Lingerie Even Though She’s Old and Fat of the Day

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Paris Hilton is way too old to be staging these kinds of shoots for herself, because you know no one hired her to be doing this.

This is up on some bored housewife shit. Hiring a photographer for the day in efforts to feel sexy and glamourous while the husband is out fucking new , young pussy.

I mean that is the world she was born and raised into, with her third or fourth generation rich parents too busy doing coke to parent her. It was the 80s people.

It’s just too bad that she’s already lookin’ like a botoxed up, divorcee who runs around with her younger K-Fed arm candy, fatter than ever, but like she still matters….in Sears catalog caliber shoots….

Not that she ever mattered, but her trust fund hired the right PR person to make us think she did back in the sex tape era…

All this to say, she’s the worst, looks like shit, and needs to save the lingerie modeling for Cora Keegan …she’s my favorite…in fact she’s the only one who matters….

Here are those horrible pics…if you look close enough…her vagina and/or uterus is hanging on for it’s life in one of the pics….and if you’re like me, it’ll make you laugh..

TO SEE PICS OF HER MAKING OUT WITH HER K-FED OF THE DAY
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Paris Hilton

2013

28

May

Beyonce Fan Slaps Her Ass of the Day

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So Beyonce doesn’t like when her front row fans slap her ass. In fact she threatens to have them escorted out. Which is probably what he was going for, after sitting through a Beyonce concert. All those tight clothes on something that shouldn’t be in tight clothes. I am thinking he was actually hoping slapping her ass would cause a ripple effect that would end up getting the venue shut down, evacuated for fear shit would spill out of her spandex she’s squeezed so tight in, and drown at least a dozen people when it gets unleashed….I mean getting kicked out is more of a thank you than a punishment, the punishment is the whole moment of contact with such an evil force….I am surprised she didn’t appreciate the male attention, you know since her husband is out there banging out hits with Rihanna…..I mean usually when old hag wives get dolled up…the ass slap is the objective of the night, but I guess Beyonce’s just more into stealing your fucking money

Posted in:Videos

2013

28

May

The Hitler Tea Kettle is the LOLZ of the Day

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So JCPenney has a billboard promoting a tea kettle, which in and of itself, is the weirdest thing to buy a billboard for, I mean it’s probably a 40 dollar item and that billboard is probably part of a 100,000 dollar campaign….but even weirder it looks like Hitler. It has the hair, the moustache and is doing a Zieg Heil….

Maybe it was a coincidence, but I doubt it, they are either trying to brainwash us based on Hilter’s brain washing, that in the event you didn’t know, was pretty effective in making a country do insane shit he told them to do….or they are trying to be funny, to go viral and remind people JCPenney still exists.

Either way, it is the LOLZ of the Day

Posted in:LOLZ

2013

28

May

Newborn Baby Rescued from Sewage Pipe of the Day

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China, the land of third trimester abortions, are now the leader in fourth trimester abortions, even if fourth trimesters don’t exist and are just you killing your baby after it is born because it is either inconvenient and gets in the way of your factory job, or worse, is not a boy…..middle America high school proms are pretty upset about being overthrown.

This is a miracle video of the baby being rescued alive shortly after being born and flushed by its mother, thanks to neighbors complaining about crying.

Next fucking level insane….

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2013

28

May

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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The highlight of my night was probably telling a hooker cam girl that I loved her…

The highlight of my day was not Mark Ruffalo telling me my jerking off, or what he calls FRACKING, lowers the value of my house by 24 percent.

Here are some morning links…

Olivia Wilde Still in a Bikini on a Paddle Board….Her Real Name Still Olivia Cock-Burn
GO

Cute Girls – In Bed
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Two People You Don’t Care About Got Married – Yay…I guess
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Candice Swanepoel’s Booty in a Yellow Bikini
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Reporter Finishes Segment After an ATV Crash
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Chinese Farmer Builds His Own Bionic Arm
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Old Man Does Skateboard Tricks
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25 Forgotten Sexy Actresses…
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Hipster Looking Babe with Small Tits Shows Us her Asshole.
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The Best Book To Pretend To Read in Public
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I Fell In Love With a Redheaded Girl who Lives 3 Hours Away from Me and Who Masturbates for Free on this Site
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS