DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2012

03

Oct

Candice Swanepoel for Victoria’s Secret of the Day

Candice Swanepoel could be covered in feces at her South African farm and I’d still want to lick her clean…so seeing her half naked for Victoria’s Secret may be boring as fuck…the same as all the other catalog pics….but still a half naked Candice Swanepoel photoshopped into a creature lovlier than she probably already is….

I can’t say I’m into this, or that I have a raging boner like I do when girls tell me they want to lick my ass while sucking my dick as another girl sits on my face, but I can say that I won’t cheapen my love for Candice like that….and I’ll deal with my soft penis and focus on the romantic love I have for her pictures instead…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

03

Oct

Imogen Thomas Pregnant Bikini Pics of the Day

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There comes a time in every hooker’s life where the sperm sticks to the uterus and the option of abortion is thrown out the window either for medical reasons or gold digging reasons…and I guess that time has come for UK Glamour Model Imogen Thomas….and I guess if you’re into half naked pregger slags….you’ll probably come too….while I prefer my pregnant girls early in their pregnancy…in a place where I can’t notice but more importantly can’t knock them up. No Condoms Allowed!

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
CLICK HERE

Posted in:Imogen Thomas

2012

03

Oct

Cameron Diaz is Still Hot as she Holds on for Esquire of the Day

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As much as I find this photoshoot great…I can’t help but think Cameron Diaz is too old for this..but then again…when a bitch doesn’t have kids…even if I am sure she might as well have had kids based on all the things she has put in her vagina…her old ass can look ok…even if it is about to rock menopause…..and even if it’s seen better days…and even if it is on its last legs…it’s got a few more rounds left in it….

Lookin’ good sweetheart….

Posted in:Cameron Diaz

2012

03

Oct

Tara Reid Upskirt of the Day

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She does this on purpose….or maybe she is just a 40 year old wreck…living out her self-fulfilling Van Wilder life…of the perpetual mess at the college party…the never ending sloppy drunk falling all over the place with her vagina exposed…something she never had to grow out of…because it became the only thing she got paid to do….

There was a time when all her low quality acting brought hope of a lasting career for her…you know before the fake tits and wet t-shirt contests she was robbed of as a college drop out who was focused on her acting career….something she’s made up for…and the reality is…I find the whole thing pretty erotic…Never give up, don’t stop this feeling, keep going….#YOLO and really she hasn’t got much options…

I love trainwrecks….they are easier to seduce.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
CLICK HERE

Posted in:Tara Reid

2012

03

Oct

Flavia Lucini Titties for Elle Mexico Oct 2012 of the Day

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This Flavia girl is amazing…I want to do wonderful things with her…like make her breakfast in bed….give her feed massages after she has a long day of shopping…rub her down in hot oil and wrestle her in my basement for my friends to watch…she’s magical and deserves the best kind of love story….and I am the one who should give it to her…and by it I mean…anal…or at least eating her ass while rubbing her clit.

She’s fantastic and here she is naked for fashion because fashion is more pornographic than DrunkenStepfather.com

I don’t know where Flavia Lucini is from…or who she is…but I know she may be perfect enough for me..

Posted in:Flavia Lucini|NSFW

2012

03

Oct

Doutzen Kroes for Victoria’s Secret of the Day

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These shoots are always the fucking same…but you know what…they work…cuz I’m still looking at them, talking about them, even though the models in the shit don’t fucking matter…despite how hard they market them into being celebrities….they are interchangeable…but still awesome half naked……

Posted in:Doutzen Kroes

2012

03

Oct

Sophie Reade 2013 Calendar Shoot of the Day

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This reminds me of an era before the internet filled with white trash posters sold in music stores of cheesy fucking girls with stupid fake 80s tits in stupid settings with captions like “rear admiral”….you know a time before the internet….you know shit quality women in shit settings half naked….but you know what…I still jerked off to it….so thanks Sophie Reade for keeping the garbage alive….

Posted in:NSFW|Sophie Reade

2012

03

Oct

Sam Faiers Getting Her Pussy Rubbed in a Bikini of the Day

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I don’t even know who this trash is…but as of today….I am a fan of her work…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
CLICK HERE

Posted in:Sam Faiers

2012

03

Oct

Kate Upton is a Busty Fat Retard for Cosmo of the Day

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I am totally uninterested in Kate Upton…she’s got fat tits..but she’s also got a fat chick body…that’s just not fat yet…and I like to avoid issues before they happen…like quitting smoking before my lungs get cancerous…and quitting drinking before my liver falls out…even though I never actually do quit anything, I am a weak man with no self control, and hating on her for being over hyped…doesn’t mean I wouldn’t eat her shit if she asked me to, and not to see how much cake she ate the night before but cuz I like her so much…

What we can learn from this interview with cosmo is that she has a weird relationship with food and mentions it at least once as fat girls in training often do….

She doesn’t like pick up lines…but I bet that’s just bullshit and if you went up to her and say “Hey Girl, you like fried food, cuz I got a sausage in my pants that’s ready to be slid into a bun”…she’d jump on the opportunity and rush you to the nearest store o pick up some bread products in order to carb load…

That she is a hooker who only leaves the house with her cell phone and 20 dollars cuz she expects the dude to pay for her…but I just say that’s convienent when kidnapping her….

Either way, she does have big tits…

Posted in:Kate Upton

2012

03

Oct

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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The most interesting sex I’ve had recently was with a girl who had an external “Outty” vagina….you know a real hanger….who folded her labia inside her….so that I wouldn’t notice…I appreciated her effort…like tucking in your shirt on a big date…the vagina version….

Here are some links

The US Pole Dancing Champion
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Cinemas Greatest SLAPS – a Compilation – VIDEO
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Guess Who May Be Back on the Market 0 VIDEO
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Meet Pamela Horton (SITE NSFW)
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And Now, a Lesson in Korean Mind Control – VIDEO
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Zahia Dehar Bikini Photos Are a Fantastic Start to the Day
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Sascha is Definitely Easy on the Eyes (SITE NSFW)
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Web Cam Girls That Will Drive You Wild
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Annnnd This Babe Has a Banana Shaped Dildo (NSFW)
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Liam Neeson the Musical: Killing Terrorists and Kicking Batman’s Ass – VIDEO
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Cali Logan and Her Pay Get It On – VIDEO
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Human Hamster Wheel, Wait, What? – VIDEO
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Sexy Games to Make This Day the Best It Can Be (NSFW)
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Posted in:stepLINKS