DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2024

01

Aug

Jessica Alba Scratches her Derek Jeter Herpes of the Day

Jessica Alba is a dot com billionaire who was at one time seen as the hottest actress in Hollywood who never got naked.

It was a pre-social media ear where everyone needs to get naked to even get noticed, soon they’ll be teaching high schools and colleges naked to keep people engaged in the content, otherwise they’ll just scroll their feed for other nakeds.

So in this era before OnlyFans, not seeing a girl naked made her 10 times easier to jerk off to, and when she’d drop some bikini pics, the people would freak out and not leave the house for days fapping to the shit….

What a weird concept, the less whorish they are, the hotter they become….but that’s not to say Alba wasn’t getting naked behind the scenes…or that she wasn’t getting her fuck on all the time. Actors aren’t very busy people.

It’s just to say that we never got to see it and one of the herpes cock she put in her was Derek Jeters, giving her that super elite strain of herpes back when having herpes was a status symbol in some circles, while still being some vile gift that keeps on giving in the crackwhore community…

So now that Alba is older, retired, still a whore who doesn’t get naked, she’s out on some luxury trip in her bikini, body still fit despite being old because she’s got nothing better to do…and she’s scratching that herpes pussy for the paparazzi…salt water makes it sting.

Here are some more of those pics…. CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2024

01

Aug

Caylee Cowan Whore on the Red Carpet of the Day

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I like to do Caylee Cowan posts because I know that she was fucking whore monger Rick Solomon, the compulsive celebrity gambler, compulsive Pam Anderson husband, Parish Hilton sex tape star who knows that the dick in the video is actually Paris’ and not his…

The reason I like to do Caylee Cowan posts is because this cunt leveled up after a suicide attempt by being recruited into the bed of Casey Affleck, the whore lover.

So the girl went from OnlyFans whore, Instagram Whore, girl who was responsible for condoms in Rick Solomon’s trash…doing what a poor chick from Arizona was designed to do after moving to LA because of her big tits, and that is anything to get her rent paid and into the moves and by anything we mean get her fuck on…just not in the porn industry, but probably could have easily ended up in the porn industry, she just managed to get lucky…

Well now that she’s got a sponsor, bankrolling her, an AFFLECK, she has a team of lawyers EMAIL ME always to delete her shitty whore content that she’s not even the copyright owner of, but I’m too lazy to troll them and let them come after me for nothing, like there is no way they’d bother coming after me in the grand scheme of things, so I take the shit down…

The content is whore photoshoots, whore nights out, lots of whoring for attention…all pretty trashy….

Now that she’s famous, or with a famous….she’s trying to erase it…but no matter how hard you try, the internet never forgets that whoring…so keep on red carpeting ya whore…we SEE YOU whore…now stop sending lawyers after me…it will make me very mad…and we’re all trying to stay positive and happy celebrating tits around here…

TOP SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Caylee Cowan

2024

01

Aug

Tanline Thursday of the Day

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Tanlines are a fetish for a few reasons, the first probably being that if you’re seeing them, you’re probably seeing a girl naked and that’s HUGE….seeing parts of the girl the son doesn’t see…

But it seems likes the tanline fetish only really comes down to when it’s a skimpy thong bathing suit pulled up over her hips and rarely a farmer’s tan where her arms and lower legs have a tan but the rest of her is pasty fucking white….

I think we should make farmer’s tans a fetish because it shows us how lucky we truly are to be naked since she’s the kind of girl who wears t-shirts to the beach and here she is NAKED….

Unfortunately, I’m stuck with girls who like to have a stencil of their underwear on their bodies….usually skimpy underwear styles to prove that they go outside and to prove that when they do, they’re slutty exhibitioinists about it.

So here’s those lame tanlines that aren’t T-Shirt tanlines the people ACTUALLY want.

Posted in:Tanlines

2024

01

Aug

Victoria Justice’s Hot Tits in a Bra in NYC of the Day

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Victoria Justice posted a video in her bra, with some hot tits busting out of said bra, which from my perspective could be small implants because in her 20 year career, I don’t remember her having small but full tits….

MAYBE she had that power of the creepers and Nickelodeon behind her, so she didn’t have to use her tits, she just let the bosses jerk off to her feet, called it a day and cashed her large paychecks….small price to pay.

But times have changed, girl has a new album to promote after being out of the public eye for about a decade….

So the logical step is find a top as close to a sheer bra as possible and walk through public places generating attention like some kind of viral stunt that doesn’t seem to be all that viral..

She has 25 million instagram followers and only 175,000 of them, which last I checked with my autistic Rain Man brain is LESS THAN 1% of her fans liked this video, making me think that 10% of her fans don’t give a shit, 10% aren’t actual fans and don’t give a shit, 10% are fans but MAD she’s being so shameless and the other 69% are robots or they have died but still have active social media accounts because no one bothered deleting them since they are lonely old men with no families but a Nickelodeon subscription…

Point of the story, I like when super famous chicks reduce themselves to public bra shamings they film as a marketing campaign….

Posted in:Victoria Justice

2024

01

Aug

Hawaiian Baby is the OnlyFans Model of the Day

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Her name is Hawaiian Baby and she’s the OnlyFans Model of the day…and she’s got that instagram face, so she must have cats.

I am not against OnlyFans or all the money that dude Leo who ignores all my emails makes.

I am from the early days of porn where dudes would run these networks of sites featuring babes that presented themselves as real people…

You make remember NextDoorNikki and Kate’s Playground and that whole group of super famous nude models who would bait you in with their free galleries.

It was a time before social media, but a time after slow to load modem porn, where people started to understand how easy it was to get rich.

I was not one of those people, unfortunately, I was too drunk but I still appreciated that whole movement of content.

I never subscribed, but people did and are probably still getting charged on their credit cards for it.

There wasn’t a real centralized social media at the time, so these girls weren’t shamelessly begging for your subscriptions…

They weren’t shamelessly self promoting their shit.

If anything, they probably did a dozen shoots one day a month and didn’t even have internet access.

The point is, selling nudes is totally great, the internet is based on it, it’s just when it gets shameless, desperate, forced or when the girls use chatbots or agencies to message and manipulate their audience with automated messages, or even worse automated chats, all to generate more stupid money from a retard audience, I get annoyed because I am here to protect you nerdy pervert….

I want you to keep your money and use the free porn out there to get off, rather than get caught under the spell of some WITCH…

That being said, hot chicks sell nudes, like this Hawaiian babe and if you’re into her, you should go subscribe because like a pimp’s low level fixer, I’m supposed to get paid off her back and that’s awesome to me because I never really got to be the pimp I wanted to be….

So check her out . CLICK HERE

Posted in:OnlyFans

2024

01

Aug

Stephanie Termont is the Instagram Of The Day

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Stephanie Termont is not from Vermont, but if she was her name would rhyme with her location and that would be life changing and amazing…

If she was from Vermont, which she’s not, she’s some Belgian Belgina from Belgium, who poses provocatively on the internet, but not provocative enough to show her Belgina Waffle, which we hope doesn’t look like a Blue Waffle, but that may because she has Lupus and we don’t know what that does to a Waffle.

But if she was from Vermont, you’d want her to be the stereotypical Vermonter, the hippie naked in nature covered in Maple Syrup and jumping through streams…all thick bushed and amazing….despite the smells…

Or you’d want her to be living out the Farmer’s daughter fantasy, where her grip on your dick is one that only generations of Dairy farmers could have…

Maybe you’d expect her to be more of an off-grid, hiding from society, choosing Vermont as the safe haven because it isn’t very populated and their woods have resources…..

But if she was actually from Vermont, she’d probably be a genderless libtard communist blue hair with a BERNIE 2020 tattoo…talking about her online domme in her poly relationship with a cuck who identifies as a cat and how that doesn’t mean she’s not an actual lesbian even if the cuck boyfriend who is a cat has a dick because it’s his lady penis….or whatever the fuck these reddit freaks spend their days debating….

Thankfully, she’s Belgian but she does look like she’s got cats!

Image Credit – Instagram

Posted in:Instagram Babe

2024

31

Jul

stepLINKS of the Day

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Normally, I am the toxic male gaze that girls have decided exists and that they’ve been coded to dress for, in that I go into the grocery store produce section in the middle of summer, ideally on a rainy day and stare at all the hard nipples…

So normally, I am the guy staring at the tits so that girls feel like someone is watching them and get uncomfortable so that they cover the tits….but today, things worked out differently…

A girl was walking through the aisles hugging her flour tortillas like they were her security blanket, a teddybear or something precious and dear to her…we all like burritos bitch, but you’re being weird with that tortilla….maybe she’s like the kind of girl who fucks produce, or the guy who fucks car exhausts, or bike seats without seats…which is my DJ NAME….BIKE SEAT WITHOUT SEATS…subscribe to my soundcloud…

As it turns out, she had giant tits and GIANT nipples, that even with her bra on needed to be covered for her comfort, without even being creeped on by my male gaze…

The only reason I knew she had epic tits is because she forgot something when at the cash and ran to get it…forgetting her trusty tortilla shield…letting the big tits with hard nipples flop in all their glory…kinda defeating the whole being modest about the tits earlier in the shopping experience, clearly trying to build up to that glorious pivotal moment…

Here are some stepLINKS….

Angel Reese Takes Credit for Women’s Basketball’s Success!
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Kim Kardashian is Ready for Her Close-Up!
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Kendall Jenner’s See Through Dress!
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Start the Conversation with Yourself Using TableTopics Journals!
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THE INSTAGRAM OF THE DAY: DARCY WILLIAMS
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Street Fighter In Real Life.. LOOOL
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Wild pigeon lays eggs inside a nest occupied by 7 baby barn owls
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Brooks Nader See Through to Pasties at SI Swimsuit Issue Launch Party!
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RC car gives roses to people in Sydney
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I HEAR VOICES
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10 Pieces Of Old School Fashion That Would Be Considered Bizarre Today
LICK HERE

Heidi Klum – Nude (arm bra)
LICK HERE

Rachel Pizzolato’s Jaw-Dropping Bikini Body: That Ass, Those Boobs!
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5 hilarious Kevin Hart movies of all time
LICK HERE

Some truly beautiful moments of kindness
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Truly amazing moments featuring female referees
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The Cavinder Twins Did SI SWIM!
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Drunk Driver Slams Into Group Of Friends Relaxing In The Afternoon
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Candice Swanepoel’s Red Hot Summer!
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Very emotional compilation of soldiers coming back from duty
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45 Programming Memes For Anyone Who Hates Their Job Enough To Try Coding
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100 very emotional moments of grandparents meeting their grandchildren
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Easily the craziest Japanese pranks ever
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RUSSIAN PRANKS ON GAGSNETWORK
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43 Hot Photos of Tugging, Pulling, and Adjusting
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Travis Kelce’s Girl Who Isn’t Taylor Swift in a Bikini!
LICK HERE

23 PEOPLE DEFINITELY HAVING A SHITTIER DAY THAN YOU
LICK HERE

Ana Cheri … Playboy Plus !
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Insane zombie prank scares people
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35 of the most insane truck driving moments ever
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24 Weird Pics of Optical Illusions in Real Life
LICK HERE

Times when dogs showed that they are their owners’ loyal bodyguards
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Helen Flanagan’s Sultry Style for Celebs Go Dating: A Black Dress, Big Cleavage, and All Smiles!
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Kara Del Toro Showers in her Bikini!
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Malik Beasley’s Wife Goes Viral!
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Where was The Boys in the Boat filmed? All filming locations explored
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Madalina Diana Ghenea shows us her body in sexy underwear on a balcony in Rome
LICK HERE

Anggie Bryan in a See Through Dress!
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Hotter Than The Sun
LICK HERE

Rihanna’s Daring Nipslip Turns Heads at NYC Party!
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That Eye Contact HAHA
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Man draws strangers very realistically in NYC and gives them to them
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Katy Perry Re-Writes History With Fake News!
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Man literally scares people at the gym with his calisthenics skills
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Find Sugar Babies
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MAKE ME RICH OFF THE BACK OF THESE CAM GIRLS
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From the Forum

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Jennifer Aniston – BTS on set of The Morning Show in New York
LICK HERE

Kiernan Shipka – Getting lunch in Los Angeles
LICK HERE

Nicole Kidman – Her Time event in Paris
LICK HERE

Leigh-Anne Pinnock – Bikini on the beach in Ibiza
LICK HERE

Paris Jackson – Seen out in Los Angeles
LICK HERE

Rihanna – AC Milan vs. Manchester City game in New York
LICK HERE

Reese Witherspoon, Cameron Diaz & Gwyneth Paltrow – Avaline Wine Dinner
LICK HERE

Elsie Hewitt – Some type of where is her nipple pixelated photoshoot
LICK HERE

Emma Corrin – S Moda Magazine
LICK HERE

Bella Thorne – Takes her Clothed/No-Show Porn Empire to Comic-Con
LICK HERE

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From stepSMUT!!

(LINKS BELOW ARE NSFW!)
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Dressed Undressed
LICK HERE

The Worst Threesome Ever Filmed?
LICK HERE

Shakes Her Titties Out (GIF)
LICK HERE

Hot Blonde Likes It Rough (GIF)
LICK HERE

Aiden Starr Aches for Cock!
LICK HERE

Lucky Anne An Adorable Waitress That Loves The Control Oral Sex Gives Her Amateur Allure
LICK HERE

She’s In Danger
LICK HERE

Outdoor Wand Ride
LICK HERE

Maelle Degroote – a bare breast in La Coquille de l’Escargot (2024)
LICK HERE

Natalia Siwiec nude
LICK HERE

Josephine Jackson Amazing Boobs In Chains
LICK HERE

Anna X Dressing Room Abby Winters
LICK HERE

Totally Worth It (GIF)
LICK HERE

“That Never Happened Before”
LICK HERE

Bush Rubber!
LICK HERE

Busty Yvain Cormich via Zishy
LICK HERE

Nurse Ashlyn Peaks Change Into a Sexier Uniform!
LICK HERE

Jenna Starr and The True Meaning of Spring Break!
LICK HERE

iStripper Busty (Sex Game)
LICK HERE

She begs for her friend to stop but he keeps fucking her ass
LICK HERE

Satine Ladies With Toys All Over 30
LICK HERE

Pixie Puerto Rican Play Thing Backroom Casting Couch
LICK HERE

After using his fingers to warm her up she’s ready to take his cock up her ass
LICK HERE

Dildo Facial
LICK HERE

‘Picture Perfect’ with Ariana Regent via Met-Art
LICK HERE

Maserati Dangerous Curves
LICK HERE

Ángela Villar topless in Otro Verano (2013)
LICK HERE

Fuck The Earth (Sex Game)
LICK HERE

Slimthick Vic in the Kitchen!
LICK HERE

Lais Ribeiro in more sexy photoshoots
LICK HERE

Locker Room Licking with Ella Reese and August Skye!
LICK HERE

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

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Fuck Girls Who Are Out of Your League….
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Fuck Fleshlights, They’re Amazing
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Girls Girls Girls – Support These Cam Girls By Falling In Love With Them
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JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:stepLINKS

2024

31

Jul

Salma Hayek in a Bikini of the Day

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Salma Hayek may be 100 fucking years old, but that doesn’t mean her tits aren’t still worth looking at all these years later…

In fact, her tits are worth a lot thanks to a billionaire buying them a bunch of years back for breeding purposes.

If they are good enough for a billionaire to buy, they are good enough to look at….you can even imagine Salma’s Lebanese/ Mexican Salami, which I guess is more of a Falafel Taco with extra creamy MOLE sauce fermenting inside her from all the men who have helped her get to a level a billionaire would deem worthy to buy….

I have seen old pics of Hayek and she’s not that great then, just another example of satanic brainwashing….but she is in a bikini….and that is what matters.

Posted in:Salma Hayek

2024

31

Jul

Paris Hilton in a Bikini of the Day

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Paris Hilton is not dead, in fact they are re-doing Simple Life for this modern generation which we can only hope fails miserably because it’s a new era where Paris isn’t relevant and her cunty rich girl princess act doesn’t resonate with the genderless people…even though the only people who will likely be into Paris Hilton are the fags…

Paris Hilton, who is basically a fag, decided to tuck her cock into her bikini for some shameless self promotion at 45 years old…using instagram filters…

Her rabid herpes were kept under control or at least hidden from the discerning fans, so no one on the boat who hasn’t already been contaminated by her herpes was contaminated…

I know what you’re thinking, that you saw her vagina in sex tapes and paparazzi pics, in all its crusty and deflated glory….and to that I say…she’s rich, it’s movie magic, what better way to deny your size 12 foot isn’t a dude’s foot than to release a porno to launch your career using a body double…

Seriously, Paris Hilton’s feet are so big that you don’t need foot finder, the feet find you…..

I made a MEME because I’m fucking GEN Z up in here and all these fucking hack fucks with their shit memes getting rich – GIVE ME SOME OF THAT low hanging fruit MONEY….SHIT HEAD STEVE…

Don’t be so gullible and stupid buying into this asshole rich people who manipulate you with their trash….

But stare at their bikini content like the whores they are…not because that is what they want you to do, since they feed off your energy and attention…but because that’s what you want to do….THEY DON’T CONTROL YOU!

Posted in:Paris Hilton

2024

31

Jul

Pussy Wedgie Wednesday of the Day

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The only point of wearing pants is to have them jacked up inside you so that you know you’ve got them on proper, otherwise anything could happen….like perverts like me not actually getting a sense of pussy shape and size in said pants…which as it turns out is a pretty important thing to get a sense of when your life fucking sucks and you have nothing to look forward to but the the slutty women in tight pants showing you their genitals for free….

They say nothing is for free and pussy of all things tends to be very expensive, or at least you get what you pay for…but thanks to the toxic male gaze that women inadvertently dress for, not realizing they dress for it, the tight pussy hugging pants make stranger pussy free…and that’s fucking wonderful, a wonder of the world or soem shit…a sign that it’s not all bad…

Even yesterday, I stared at some over fit, starves herself, over-jogger in the skimpiest shorts and she was basically nothing but one giant pussy thanks to having no fat anywhere else…and it was glorious…

So here are some pussy in pants…for us to enjoy!