DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

Sierra Ferrell Brings the Weirdo Nudes of the Day

Sahara Ray Sucks Dick of the Day

Demi Moore’s Dinosaur Tits of the Day

X-Tina Aguilera’s Porn Tits of the Day

Julianne Hough’s White Bikini of the Day

2011

Aug

Rihanna Wet and in a One Piece Bob Marley Bathing Suit of the Day

1 Comment »

Here’s Rihanna in Barbados for the second week….I guess she’s decided that she can’t compete with the white folks…as her shit was getting stale and boring before she decided to re-invent herself with some reggae and Soca vibe, yes I just did my first music review and it was about Rihanna’s shitty pop music…..so she’s taping in and promoting herself as an authentic islander….which no one ever really denied, cuz getting her career start as a teenage hooker at the karaoke bar where she fucked rich white people from the UK while they were on vacation….lead to a lot of bitterness and hate from her peers and when they turn on you…you kinda lose that Islander edge…that she’s clearly trying to re-establish….

The Bob Marley one-piece bathing suit was a good touch…I mean I can taste the Roti pussy from here…it’s thick, irritating, but I’d still try to get up in it, I mean shit this is Rihanna…..

Posted in:Rihanna

2011

Aug

Some Pussy at the Teen Choice Awards of the Day

2 Comments »

I didn’t watch or liveblog the teen choice awards because I’m more into living my own life…or self destructing in my own life than wasting my night in front of my creepy neighbor’s television cuz I don’t have a TV, watching the shit, while worried he’s drugged me to rape me, or more importantly to keep me, cuz he’s that kind of weird…

I also don’t find anything teenagers like interesting, if anything it is depressing and makes me happy the end of the world is near, cuz these vapid little materialistic consumers are so fucking uninteresting….

Although, I do wish I was still in highschool, cuz when I creep on Highschool, I see a whole lot of sluts, all willing to have anal sex, cuz it’s socially accepted, and all busty thanks to hormones in the food, making elements of this generation fantastic, but still not fantastic enough, cuz the second you talk to one of these 16 year olds, the idea of having sex with them and their huge hormone in food tits loses its appeal cuz teens are fucking idiots…

That said, here is some of the pussy being marketed to teens, cuz they are a good demo that pay the fuckin’ bills and have logevity or some shit….

The whole thing, pretty boring to me, but then again, I’ve been doing this for 8 years, and I’ve been uninterested in hollywood and celebrity since long before I started this…making my life a fucking torture…

But at least there’s some tits…and desperate for attention girls willing to really put themselves out there to matter…which sometimes is a good thing…

Selena Gomez…cuz the Teen Choice Awards are the best place for Sex Offenders…

Demi Lovato and Selena Gomez…cuz it was a good PR Move…

Fergie Looking Tough…Like a Wrestler Chick….or an Action Hero and you probably like that..cuz you are a virgin loser and that’s what you’re into….of the Day…

Ashley Greene’s Boring Outfit cuz she fucking sucks…

Tyra Banks….in Spandex….Should be Arrested for Indecent Exposure…

Blake Lively in Latex Looking Dress…that I’d like to cum on, because it’d be easier to clean than her wrinkled weathered face…

Cameron Diaz….So Not a Teen Anymore…not even close…but she may be growing a clit dick for A-Rod…but I haven’t seen pics of it yet…

Taylor Swift…..does the Marilyn Monroe…cuz I guess she’s trying to be more interesting, cuz this prudish act we know is an act cuz John Mayer totally fucked her up the ass raw dog, is hardly fun for us to watch….wholesome is for girls you marry, not girls you masturbate to..t

Alexa Vega….wearing a dress worth noticing..

Raven Symone…..cuz she used to sit on Bill Cosby’s lap in a way you probably wouldnt want your 4 year old sitting on some pervert with a Master’s in Education cuz he loves kids so much’s lap…

Holland Roden is a Ginger in Green …..like some kind of Leprochaun waitin for you at the end of the rainbow…

AnnaSophia Robb and Bethany Hamilton cuz Both Arms Played One Arm in a Movie and now thy are BFF….OBVS….even though it looks like One Arm could eat pretty much all of Two Arms…

Some Avril Lavigne All Lady-Like in a hot dress….even though her daily style is suburban mall punk on her 14th birthday….which would be more appropriate….

Kaley Cuoco cuz Her Hotness Might Have Killed John Ritter….at least her teen looks over stimulated his heart…giving a whole new meaning to “Killer Looks”….that’s the story I heard…

Some Fake Looking Tits Named Maryse Ouellet I’ve never heard of…but appreciate…

Kim Kardashian at any event where people will take pics of her in efforts of trying to stay relevant….

To Remind you this Award show is a fucking useless joke…Rebecca Black was there…and it looks like she won…

Posted in:Teen Choice Awards 2011

2011

Aug

Charlize Theron Hard Nipples of the Day

No Comments »

Despite the AIDS in South Africa stats, I’m not worried about getting AIDS from Charlize Theron’s South Africa pussy, cuz you see, you can’t get AIDS through a picture of some older hotness who moved to America with a dream and who is now an Academy Award winner who did Playboy to get noticed back when she first started, all rockin’ some hard nipples…..

But you can get aids swimming down river from a gay nudist waterfall…and the fresh shit filled semen gets stuck to your fucking open sore on your leg….it’s just always a story no one believes when they ask you how you got Aids….

Here are her nips.

Posted in:Charlize Theron

2011

Aug

Kate Hudson New Mom Body Can’t Distract From her Haggard Face of the Day

No Comments »

Kate Hudson looks so old and haggard…I’m talking her mom looks more youthful and fresh than her….

I was actually forced to watch her latest movie and I blame very hot vagina coupled with my weakness for hot vagina for that…and the entire time, I couldn’t believe anyone would ever fight over her…I mean other than two Johns looking for the cheapest street blowjob and she’s the only discount whore around….

I can only assume that with being raised in Hollywood, in a broken home, with a famous mom, led to having too much access to cash, too little parenting, lots of drugs and hard living….and now it’s all coming out in her face….not that it matters…this is Kate Hudson…a real no body.

But at least she’s not fat and bounces back from pregnancy pretty face, cuz you know, hard drugs are a good way to replace eating…speed up metabolism…if you’re willing to sacrific your face…

Posted in:Kate Hudson

2011

Aug

Rachel Bilson is a Vision in White of the Day

No Comments »

This is like a dream….a vision of an angel when I’ve taken one too many sleeping pills…you know in efforts to excape this miserable life…only to realize that I’m obese and thus too big to take down with a shitty over the counter sleeping pill….leaving me forced to continue to self destruct via unprotected sex with hookers and alcholism…not that I actually ever want to die…I’m too self absorbed for that…not to mention watching all the idiots go by and dealing with such low level day to day problems, like having to eat out my gross wife once a week in order to get my 100 dollars from her….and never making money to afford the good life…is like a comedy act…and I hate comedy….

I also kinda hate Rachel Bilson for being boring as shit most of the time…but today…this is all virginal and lovely and sometimes the world needs less exposed skin, and more wholesome tenderness….that said…I’d prefer these pics if there was a little more spread pussy lip…

Posted in:Rachel Bilson

2011

Aug

Blake Lively Legs and Cleavage on Site of the Day

No Comments »

I have no idea why I am bothering posting these Blake Lively pictures…I guess she’s showing a little cleavage, which I guess is exciting to those of you who never leave the fucking house, cuz everywhere I seem to look, for middle school to the old folks home, there’s fucking cleavage, making it one of those things you can’t openly get excited about, because the people around you will think you are weird, or at leasted totally sexually repressed/under sexed and that’s never a good way to get a blowjob, assuming there’s ever a time when you’re no alone, something I doubt…but here’s Blake Lively on set..cuz I know how fans are…and seeing her anywhere will get you excited….and I guess that’s all I have to say about that.

Posted in:Blake Lively

2011

Aug

Titty Flash with Nipples on Youtube of the Day

No Comments »

Here’s a video that was posted to Youtube Aug 1st, 2011…..it is called “hot body contest spring break naked girls dance sexy bikini thong Hot boobs breasts 1″….it has all off 900 views and features some slutty, trashy college girls shaking thir ass like they aren’t drunk white chicks….these trash can bitches letting loose at some cheesy sports bar, who make the world go round and more importantly keep the likes of Jersey Shore tv shows on the air…are amazing….but not as amazing as seeing titty flash and nipples on youtube..

I’m sure this video is gonna get pulled fast…but watch it while it’s still there….

Posted in:Viral Video

2011

Aug

Heidi Klum Topless Beach Pics to Start the Day of the Day

7 Comments »

Here is mother of a small african village, Heidi Klum, tapping into her National Geographic influenced life, you know trying to be as authentic as possible, walking around all sloppy titty to the watering hole or some shit that jerk off fantasies from the 1950s were made off…but the truth is…I’m always down to see a top model I used to find one of the hottest pieces of ass in the world topless….at pretty much any age..Momma Africa or not…cuz that’s just the kinda pervert I am…

On a sidenote, I have no idea when these pictures were taken, I just assume they are new cuz they were just emailed to me…

Posted in:Heidi Klum

2011

Aug

Rumored Cathay Pacific Sex Scandal Pics of the Day

2 Comments »

I have a friend who used to fuck a Cathay Pacific flight attendent and he fucking loved every second of it…now I’m not sure if this is actually the same girl…cuz lets face it all Cathay Pacific airline workers kinda look the same…but the hotness is that this bitch was sucking off the pilot, in the cockpit, midflight, and that to me is what pilot school dreams are made of…hell that’s what every traveling man with an erection and a decent looking flight attendent they’d ideally take into the bathroom stall and seduce…since they are the stripper sluts of the air, and you paid good money for them to work you into having an enjoyable flight, that they are…but there are air marshalls to worry about….

Either way, we all knew this went on or assumed it went on…long haul flights are boring…but I think it’s a scam…maybe a porno parody…but AOL is reporting it so it must be true…

Here’s what they had to say…

Hong Kong-based Cathay Pacific Airways is launching an investigation into pictures that appear to show a pilot receiving oral sex from a flight attendant while in a commercial airplane cockpit.

Low quality photos of the act, featuring a woman in a red outfit not unlike those of Cathay Pacific’s flight attendants and a pilot, have circulated through Chinese media. According to some reports, the two are a couple.

“We are conducting a full investigation into the matter and there are some indications that the female shown in the photos may be a member of our cabin crew,” a Cathay spokeswoman told Agence France Presse. However, she added that, “There is no evidence whatsoever to suggest that the act took place in-flight, and there are no reasons to believe that any safety breaches have occurred.”

The pilot, who is apparently not from Hong Kong, issued a legal letter to local paper Apple Daily saying the photos had been stolen from his personal computer and he had filed a police report.

According to GlobalPost, industry sources suspected the photos’ release was part of a malicious stunt to hurt the company.

Here’s the animated recreation…

Posted in:Cathay Pacific

2011

Aug

stepNEWS of the Day

1 Comment »

Here’s some amazingness going on in the news…I am sure there’s other shit going on that’s even better, but that would mean I was giving you the best content on the internet, and that would fuck up my reputation as the biggest waste of space on the internet….and I’m not willing to do that…but I do like the cop walking off the job in his underwear, something I think we should all do right now, ideally women in the office building next door to me….

Medical Pot Cardholders Wrongly Arrested
Lawyers say patients who are legally allowed to use medical marijuana are being wrongfully arrested.

Adult Video Store Robbery Caught on Tape
A man with a shotgun ordered an adult video store clerk to hand over everything and the whole incident was caught on tape.

3 Charged in Stolen iPhone Ring
Police in D.C. and Virginia are announcing a major bust as they crack down on suspects who are stealing iPhones and other electronics

Remorseful Purse Snatcher
A theft, who gained a conscious after stealing a woman’s purse, showed up at her door with money and an apology.

Cop Walks Off the Job in HIs Underwear
Here’s something you don’t see every day… a police officer walking out of his precinct in nothing but his underwear.

Woman Says LAX PD Officer Assaulted Her
An officer at Los Angeles International Airport has been placed on adminstrative leave while authorities investigate a young woman’s allegations that she was sexually assaulted at the airport.

Posted in:stepNEWS