DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2011

31

Mar

Jenna Jameson’s Whore Boots Cuz She’s a Professional Slut of the Day

It is hard to get excited over a bitch who I have seen get fucked more than I’ve seen my own wife fuck, but for some reason seeing Jenna Jameson whore boot shopping with her best friend and business partner, her droopy mom vagina that was droopy before being a mom to twins that the fertility drugs made…thanks to being one of the most successful porn stars which is code for the girl who has been paid a lot only cuz she fucked a lot on camera…it’s not like bitch was making 1,000,000 dollars a scene or anything…she was just doing a lot of fucking scenes…and with a lot of fucking scenes…comes one tired vagina….making me thing maybe these leather boots are more about holding up her pussy lip she’s got tucked into them so it doesn’t drag…but still keeping me staring…possibly cuz we are best friends on Twitter, even though she never writes me back….as to you DON’T FOLLOW ME

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Posted in:Jenna Jameson

2011

31

Mar

Snooki is a Pig for the WWE of the Day

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I just hope someone Owen Harts this bitch…you know some real wrestler shit that leaves her dead before the age of 65…..you know like some Chris Benoit murder suicide, or Owen Hart broken neck in the ring, or some Andre The Giant too large for her heart to keep her going….or pretty much anything that ends her useless fucking existence because she doesn’t deserve any of the “fame” she’s got…I shouldn’t know who this monster is…being a punchline of a joke shouldn’t be so prosperous…bitch should be in the corner feeling inadequate and suicidal…not basking in every second of it…She is the fucing worse, even if she doesn’t need a costume for this gig. These novelty act PR stunts don’t help….FOLLOW ME

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Posted in:Snooki

2011

31

Mar

There’s a Girl With No Pants on in a Coffee Shop of the Day

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This just in, a reader is at a Coffee shop and the girl next to him isn’t wearing pants and looks like she’s bare assed on the chair like no one is watching but people are always watching….especially when bare assed on a chair in a coffee shop…highly erotic…just don’t let her know she’s on this site, I think it’ll upset her…but when girls look like this…who needs celebrities…and people say I’m not a relevant media source…..FOLLOW ME

Posted in:amateur

2011

31

Mar

Obese Man Welded to Chair for 2 Years of the Day

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No. Despite popular belief, this story wasn’t about me. You can stop sending your emails in.

I’m not welded to a chair. I am just married to one and never get off my fat ass and sure sometimes there’s piss and shit all over this bitch from laziness and eagerness to get you the latest drunkenstepfather post…but I have the ability to get up if I really have to. I just don’t really like doing it….

That’s all I have to say about that. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:stepNEWS

2011

31

Mar

Katy Perry Featuring Kanye West Music Video of the Day

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Here’s Kanye West doing his best Drake impression.

Here’s Katy Perry doing her best female popstar impression.

Here’s a video that channels Wal-E or whatever the fuck that Disney Movie about the lonely robot from the future.

The only thing they do right is when they make the bitch have an E.T. face.

Fuck her music sucks, her video is cheese, her face is ugly, even with a million dollar make-up and post production budget and her tits aren’t all over the place or being used at all…even though they are the only thing she’s good for…

What a fucking horrible disaster. I hate radio music. I’m glad only 300 people watched this so far…I hate that I am going to make more people see it…I am the devil…FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Katy Perry

2011

31

Mar

Lindsay Lohan’s Amazing Face of the Day

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A face in a sidewalk is still a face, making Lohan outside a club a pretty amazing face….one you know can lead to good fucking times…cuz when a bitch is face first in a sidewalk…I know I can do amazing things to her…

I’m not one to speculate, or make up stories about these people I’ve only met once after a two year text message friendship, but I am one to get drunk, make a fool of myself, sometimes risk the life of some or many, so I know that when a bitch is on the ground, on her knees, outside a club with a cigarette in hand, it usually has something to do with being real fucked up….drunk, high, medicated, just excited about life or the fact that the girl you are obsessed with cuz she controls you and helped you throw your life away while riding you to the top by feeding your heroin and making you look bad…..

I texted Sam Ronson the other day, I asked who her new girlfriend was and whether I could make her unofficial fansite for her, she ignored me. It hurt…and who really cares….cuz it’s Sam Ronson. A fucking nobody.

What it comes down to is this picture is the best picture ever. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan

2011

31

Mar

Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio and Candice Swanepoel in their Bikinis of the Day

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Here are three bikini models in their bikinis…I don’t think I really have to say anymore cuz this is bikini models in bikinis….not much thought is supposed to go into staring at this shit…it is supposed to tap into our primal instincts and make girls hate themselves…and make guys hate their baby momma’s cuz they didn’t bounce back as proper as two of these three bitches did…the same two bitches who make Candice Swanepoel look even hotter than she is…knowking that she’s the only one who hasn’t been ravaged by baby tearing out her insides. FOLLOW ME

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Posted in:Adriana Lima|Alessandra Ambrosio|Candice Swanepoel

2011

31

Mar

Christine Hendricks Pushed Up Titty of the Day

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Mad Men was cancelled yesterday. Or at least put on hold because the cast were in negotiation wars or some shit I wasn’t paying attention to because I don’t watch Mad Men. If anything, I hate Mad Men because I always get stuck in the elevator, or at the table, or in line next two some asshole on the phone, or in coversation, talking about how great fucking Mad Men is…..and it got old the first week, now it’s at the point of “It’s like that episode of Seinfeld” level of I want to rip your fucking throat out you suburban middle manager…

So it’s nice to have their morale destroyed….especially when Christine Hendricks’ tits aren’t going anywhere…not that I care about her tits, as I have the ability to see past them and notice that she’s fat, but you can’t….so here are those titties to celebrate the end of Mad Men, or at least the end of getting stuck beind idiots talking about Mad Men…even though I found out it was on hold getting a coffee this morning…but the storm will blow over and I have hope that I will find freedom….FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Christine Hendricks

2011

31

Mar

Double Wonder Woman for the Virgin Losers of the Day

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Here’s Adrianna Palicki on set of Wonder Woman again….I posted similar pictures yesterday , but figured you’re going to watch an entire season of this shit, so get used to it, only this time she’s with her dumpy friend….

It looks like these Wonder Women Katy Perry lookin’ bitches are wearing diapers in their bullshit Wonder Women costumes you’re so excited for because they have shitty bodies, that you’re excited about, because you have no friends, no pussy, no social life, you’re awkward and you’re not charming, funny or interesting, you like comics but no one likes you….making the only thing anyone should wonder when it comes to these pics is why you haven’t killed yourself yet –

Here’s ome pics of two bitches dressed as Wonder Woman. I hope this doesn’t cause any seizures or bouts of excitement that make you accidentally run over your computer chair in your dad’s hummer…

If it wasn’t for the tits, I’d be convinced this was a dude…gaylord…..FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Wonder Woman

2011

31

Mar

Jennifer Love Hewitt Dresses Conservative of the Day

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Lookin’ Sexy Jennifer Love Hewitt….

She really needs some tips on how to dress to make dudes want to fuck you…it’s like even if the bitch is fat, dumpy and older than when we used to jerk off to her, she could still exploit those tits, hike up the dress, or do anything to make her a little desirable…

I get that being the sluttiest bitch at the muslim colony cuz she’s showing some ankle is good in theory, since the world has so many muslims…and it could be a big market for her but not so good in practice, cuz it’s boring to look at….See Muslim, along with the kid I saw on Oprah who was allergic to the sun is the only people I know who leave the house…dressed this revealing….and I guess Jennifer Love’s decided to join that hustle….cuz maybe that farm girl in the 50s who was a good bible girl who had illicit thoughts and desires she took out on Daddy’s hired help is probably a fantasy to at least one person in their 70s who still remember an era of sluts disguised as conservative….I don’t remember yesterday. Who cares. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Jennifer Love Hewitt