I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2010

21

Jan

Immodesty Blaize is Some Burlesque Chick in a Shitty See Through of the Day

I hate burlesque. It is just a bunch of fat chicks who get together and reflect on an era where fat chicks were considered hot because skinny chicks were usually poor or diseased and you were told to stay the fuck away from them. I hate that these burleque bitches get attention, money, noteriety, careers for doing something dated, repetitive, totally unerotic and and really fucking stupid. So I wasn’t familiar with Immodesty Blaize, but it turns out she’s at the top of her fucking game in her industry which doesn’t deserve to be a fucking industry, but is, because other fat chicks get excited to see a fat bitch get on stage with such confidence, when most fat chicks have no self esteem anymore cuz we’ve worked so hard at making them have no self esteem because we don’t like fat chicks cuz skinny doesn’t mean poor and diseased anymore, it means worth fucking….

Here she is continuing her annoying act by wearing a see through dress that’s not even a fucking see through, it’s just part of the burlesque “tease” mentality….a mentality that needed to die with Bettie Page

Pics via LFI

Posted in:Immodesty Blaize|See Thru

2010

21

Jan

This Was My Worst Fear of the Day

I am married to a 320 pound woman and for the longest time my biggest fear was that she would sit on me, suffocate me and end up killing me. Seriously, whenever I would lower myself to fuck her, I’d worry that she’d try to get on top, because no only does my dick not touch the walls of her vagina, but my internal organs can’t’take her weight, but now I just hope that she will to put me out of my misery.

It turns out that this fat bitch in the video beat my wife to using her fast food, cakes and laziness addiction as a weapon….and the amazing thing is that she got off! So fat bitches out there with asshole boyfriends out there, this may be for you.

Posted in:Fat Suffocation|Worst Fear

2010

21

Jan

The Playboy Twins are Boring as Fuck of the Day

I didn’t realize that the show Girls Next Door was still on TV, I have never seen it so maybe I shouldn’t be talking about how shit it is, but based ont he girls who have come out of it in the past, I can only assume it’s a real waste of fucking time….but it turns out that it is still on TV and that these girls were the girls cast to play Hef’s “Girlfriends” but they recently got fired for not beign all that hot and fucking boring because here they are in their first appearance as free girls and they aren’t in trashy lingerie or naked or in see thru outfits, which is really all they are good for and what is expected out of them, even if I am so tired of typical trashy strippers in typical trashy outfits, it’s played the fuck out….Either way, I just spent too much time on these girls so I’m gonna end this now and try to find something more inspiring to write about…in case you were wondering….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Playboy Twins|Shannon Twins

2010

21

Jan

UK Big Brother Evicted Guests Get Wasted of the Day

Some usless gutter piece of shit trash named Lady Sovereign and Ronnie Woods’ annoying mail order bride who he beat the fuck up because he realized garbage hipsters are more fun to beat up than to fuck were the first to get kicked off Celebrity Big Brother UK and I guess they went to celebrate how annoying they are by getting wasted and more annoying.

I’ve unfortunately been in the same room as Lady Sovereign at her concert. Bitch is not really a bitch but more a poor white dude from the trailer park. She was spitting and hacking and lookin’ for her Heineken and the whole thing was about as sexy as watching your fat friend take a fucking shit….

I don’t really know why I am posting this, but I can only assume it’s because it’s a slow news day and not because I am proud that I was in the same room as this piece of garbage, but I had nothing else to really write about when it comes to two idiots even their home country doesn’t give a fuck about…..

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Evicted|Trash|UK Big Brother

2010

21

Jan

Venus Williams Tennis Ass Flash of the Day

I don’t understand these videos, they are kinda creepy as fuck, but apparently Venus Williams decided to match her underwear to her skin color to make the world think she was playing tennis naked, like some kind of bad halloween costume which may have made the sport a little more interesting to watch for some, it wasn’t enough for me to jerk off to because female tennis has always been an amazing sport to watch in terms of getting turned on. It is the reason we watch it, historically there have been a bunch of young hot players the public has fallen in fucking love with because watching a bitch play tennis is graceful, sweaty, peppered with grunts you can only recreate 12 inches deep in her ass, all while wearing little skirts and showing off panty, sweaty cameltoe and other good things….making this just all par for the court….

Here she is in action……

Posted in:Ass Flash|Venus WIlliams

2010

21

Jan

Conspiracy Theory in Haiti of the Day

I have been yelled at by everyone I talk to about my conspiracy that the USA set off an Earthquake in Haiti in efforts to take over their government for whatever reason (Cuba), and figured this type of thing would show how weak the current government, making the Haitian people open to letting the USA take over. Sure I could be totally wrong and maybe my readers, friends, the drunk lady I told this to on the bus and everyone else who calls me fucking crazy is right. I don’t have any validation, proof and I really know nothing about politics, it just seemed to make sense to me and I guess it made sense to everyone’s favorite Communist Dictator pretty much saying I was right..

That said doesn’t mean Haiti isn’t suffering and you should donate if you can…

Posted in:Conspiracy|Haiti|USA

2010

21

Jan

Awkward Israeli Art Film of the Day

I think my site lacks culture, maybe that’s my biggest downfall and the reason no one in any industry takes me seriously, I need to put more art into the mix cuz art is class and I gotta stop the hateful celebrity commentary where I just make a joke out of myself…So you can only imagine how excited I was when one of my Israeli readers happened to have an award winning art film he made to share with me….and you can only imagine my delight when I watched it and saw dude having sex with a fucking blow-up doll in some kind of uncomfortable fetish porn disguised as art, but was glad it wasn’t his other film where he made a popsicle out of his cum called Cocksicle.

I guess the nice thing about art is that it affects each of us differently, like I was on the floor laughing when I saw this, but you may shed a tear because you can relate to his desire for love or maybe you’re just creeped the fuck out…something I can only assume most of you will be because it is awkward as fuck….and it is safe to say it may make it hard for you to watch porn or get turned on again…welcome to my world….

I told him I would spread his word but he asked me to post his facebook in exchange….so if you like it, it is called Safety in Rubber and I don’t think it will be in a theater near you…

Posted in:Art Film|Israel|Safety in Rubber

2010

20

Jan

stepLINKS of the Day

I always forget what stepLINKS pictures I’ve used, I should really figure out a system…that said I was going to do a relief fund for Haiti to motivate you slobs to donate some money but I gave up knowing that I’m just going to get discouraged when I see that we only raised 3 dollars and a guitar pick, three expired condoms and a twinkie to the cause, cuz when that happens it just reminds me how insignificant this site actually is and really makes me wonder why I bother doing it all day every day when I could be doing better things like eating all you can eat buffets at the trashy stripclubs to get fatter and fatter amongst disgusting half naked women….

Here are my stepLINKS….

Why the Fuck Are They Still Giving This Octocunt So Much Publicity?
GO

Keeley Hazell’s Face is Sort of Busted But Her tita and Ass Make Up For It
GO

Gotta Love Them Hos
GO

Why the Fuck Haven’t I Been Watching MTV Teen Mom? Oh Yeah Because I Don’t Have a TV
GO

Star Wars Opening – REDIT
GO

The Worst Talkshow Hosts of All Time
GO

Stacey Dash’s Hottest Pics
GO

A Little More of Paris Hilton’s Pussys
GO

Micole Kidman is Gross
GO

Stripfilm of the Day
GO

Hahahah Let’s Laugh at Leno More – VINTAGE VIDEO
GO

Rhianna Cares About Haiti
GO

Kelly Brooke is Topless in the Bath
GO

Who Let Chewbacca Walk the Red Carpet
GO

I Wanna Bang Laura Bell Bundy
GO

I Forgot How Hot Shania Twain Was
GO

Amanda Palmer is See Through
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Aura Dione, What the Fuck Are You Wearing?
GO

Did You See This Naked Chick in the Make the Girl Dance Video
GO

Lizzie is Nude on the Bridge
GO

Kid Bails Hard – VIDEO
GO

Jamee in the Dressing Room
GO

Jesus This Heidi Montage Shit is Just Getting More Scary By the Minute
GO

Vanessa Has no Panties On
GO

I Love Some Kylie Minogue
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Love Lux Cassidy
GO

Laura Blokhina is Hot
GO

Britains Best Bums
GO

Gotta Love Twin Sluts
GO

Kim and Khloe Kardashian Make Themselves Look More Stupid Anything They Open Their Mouths
GO

Why Hello Yanna and Alla
GO

Virtual Lapdance Anyone?
GO

Ashlyn and Alyssa Get It On
GO

Comedy Aside, Conan O’Brian is a Real Class Act
GO

Maybe Madonna Should Sell Her Plane and a Few Other Thinsg Because the $250 000 She Donated to to Haiti Isn’t
GO

When Grandma Gets Fisteds
GO

88 Bull Riding Beauties
GO

I Still Got the Hots for Elle Macphereson Even Though Her Face is Fucking Orange
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2010

20

Jan

Fun Married Couple of the Day

I don’t see what the big deal is, so dude convinced kids to have sex while he masturbated in the corner, sounds like a good time to me, I mean in this generation you can’t have a party with teenagers without the sex, he’s just trying to keep shit current and trendy, holding onto his youth and being the cool older guy who faciliates the fun, so I can only blame the Christian policies of the USA for ruining his fun….. like when I got in trouble for buying a 15 year old a bag of coke for a handjob, 14 is legal motherfuckers…fine that never happened…I just gave her crushed up lactose pills but she didn’t know the difference, fine…I never got it on with a 14 year old, not even when I was 14, but it coulda happened and it woulda been legal, cuz I am in Canada….I do know a creep guy who would jerk off to teens fucking when I see one and this dudes mustache should have given him away….

Posted in:Cool Couple|Party

2010

20

Jan

Katie Price and her Tired Face, Stupid Tits and Puke Dress of the Day

Katie Price is getting old and her plastic surgery doesn’t seem like it is keeping up with the aging process no matter how hard she tries.

Sure, she still has her stupid tits that distract you from all else wrong with her, but her face looks pretty hacked up and tired, but I guess that’s what happens when your career is based on getting fucked up at parties and getting fucked in sex tapes before doing stupid photoshoot and marrying a gay dude who was under the impression you were a man because of the bulge you have in your pants….

So I guess her dress that looks like the puke covered snow outside my local bar, you know a wide variety of colors of puke you don’t really want to put in your mouth or eat, kinda the same feelings you’d have when faced with her pussy….

But we watched her come up, we might as well watch her fall and that concludes our review of short lived pathetic careers.

Pics via INF

Posted in:Haggard|Katie Price|old|Tired|Tits