I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

11

Jun

Ciara Dressed for the Leather Bar cuz She was Born a Man of the Day

There was a rumor circulating the Ciara was all man, or at least born a man, making all you weirdos who jerk off to her get all weirded out with your sexuality, but apparently that rumor was just a rumor and she was born with a cunt, which doesn’t really explain why she’s wearing a pair of leather pants, like she’s heading to a leather bar to do poppers and get her dick sucked off by random men, but her wonky lookin’ face does explain that regardless of whether she was born a man or not, anyone who jerked off to this, had issues with their sexuality to begin with, so it doesn’t make you gay, it just makes you weird and it makes me weirder for wasting my time posting this….

Posted in:Ciara|Leather Pants

2009

11

Jun

Annalynne McCord’s Kinda Hot Body of the Day

I still don’t really know who Annalynne McCord is, not because I keep my 90210 intake on the minimum, because that’d be a lie, I mean every weekend I try to organize marathons with 35 year old chicks who still get horny thanks to their teenage fantasies of fucking Luke Perry, leaving them left with their depressing, lonely, divorced life and me…unfortunately, I haven’t found a bitch dumb enough to make it happen, I just don’t bother with revival shit, I find it lame, but not as lame as assholes with old school skateboards in their pink fuckin’ Vans shoes and strategically ripped pants, acting like they’ve always been down, not that down really exists anymore, everything is pop, but if this motherfucker showed up at the skatepark in 1990, we would have beat him the fuck up for being a poser, then we’d gang rape his whore girlfriend, in her wife beater, with her perky little tits and skinny body, even though she spends her day on an embarrassing show….

Posted in:Annalynne McCord|Tits|White Shirt

2009

11

Jun

Kendra Wilkinson is Pregnant of the Day

So Kendra Wilkinson decided to keep the baby this time around, because her doctor said her womb can’t handle another abortion. It was her favorite form of contraceptive throughout her teen years and now that she’s found a nice man she’s been dating for half a minute, she figures, why the fuck not keep the little fucker, it’ll be way less annoying than the other STDs she’s landed over the years because at least he’ll reach an age where he will be able to talk back to her and have a relationship with her, instead of just inconveniencing her. The timing really couldn’t be better, she’s launching a reality TV show and there’s really nothing more that the men who would have watched her to jerk off want to see, I mean fuck a tight bodied Playboy superstar, give me the nauseating pregnant chick with nausea getting fat and more annoying than she already is. Idiots.

On a side note, if the dude in the header pic is her baby daddy, motherfucker looks nervous, like wondering what to do when you get a whore pregnant, the trick I learned is to stage a nightmare and punch them in the gut, or throw them down the stairs, or if you are ambitious, pay someone to have a horrible car accident with them.

On another sidenote, I don’t get why this bitch always rocks stupid white sneakers like she was fucking Seinfeld. I find it offensive.

Here are the boring pics….

Posted in:Kendra Wilkinson|Pregnant

2009

11

Jun

Tila Tequila and Her Live Stream Piano Recital Bullshit of the Day

I am not sure what Tila is doing, but I have a feeling she’s doing a webcam video of her smoking a joint, but I guess it could be a cigarette, you know like a 14 year old girl who just picked up smoking and is trying to be bad, snappin’ off pics of her with a cigarette in her her mouth to post on her Facebook, so that all the family and friends see how bad she is, you know in an attempt to say “FUCK YOU DAD”.

Either way, here’s Tila talking about herself, with some kind of twang, like some kind of rapper, and it is annoying, but she shouts out Compton and Jamaica, because I guess those dudes like fake tits on tacky stripper types, identifying what her fan base is.

I find this whole fucking thing so weird, lonely and pretty fucking creepy. It makes me hate technology but at the same time makes me feel sorry for her, despite her fame and money, just shows off serious attention craving, I guess someone’s daddy didn’t hug her enough.

So watch it if you want, she’s running around her house alone, dancing around, singing stupid shit, talking stupid shit and takes the opportunity to show us how refined she is around 15 minutes in and plays the piano like some kind of virtuoso, who didn’t drop out of piano lessons to get fake tits and denounce the opressed asian life her partents forced her into, you know straight A’s, the chance of being a doctor and making a difference, hardcore piano recitals, gymnastics and whatever else Asian parent make their kids do, before they crack under serious ethnic pressure identity crisis and throw it all to shit.

The whole time, I’m just waiting for the serial killer to come in through those windows and off her ass.

Posted in:Live Stream|Tila Tequila

2009

11

Jun

This is My New Form of Entertainment of the Day

I don’t really watch real porn. I find the shit too fucking lame, but when I came across this trailer for a porn, I couldn’t help but post it. I guess the assholes at Digital Playground don’t realize that doing these big production, shitty acting, shitty script, dramatic movies, like they were some straigth to DVD shit starring Mischa Barton and Jessica Biel, when really they are just supposed to be about the fuckin’.

I guess it’s their way of keeping shit different than what’s out there, you know big budget, big box office result kind of thinking, but this trailer blew me away, and not in a good way, because it’s almost laughable at what kind of money has gone into it, considering that it is just a fuckin’ porno.

This is how I am starting today and I don’t care if you approve.

Posted in:Digital Playground|Porn Previews

2009

10

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

In case you were wondering, when you are vagina hunting in the park, spending a few hours smoking cigarettes with a group of 14 year old girls in their school uniforms is a huge waste of time.

In case you were wondering, when a gay dude asks you to recommend a horror movie for a sleepover they are having, recommend straight porn, since pussy is the worst kind of monster to a fag.

In case you were wondering, I haven’t eaten in 2 days because I am trying to get my bikini body like I was that fat black chick on The View who is planning her big titty reveal.

In case you were wondering, I am working my way to the top, but I always get stuck at the first or second step, I have pretty shitty stamina, I am lazy, and I have convinced myself that I have asthma.

Here are my stepLINKS……

If You Think You Have Seen All Web Sluts Have to Offer, You Are Wrong
GO

There’s Something You Just Don’t Do and Tasering a 72 Year Old Lady is One of them
GO

As If Animal Sex Didn’t Rule Enough Already
GO

The 9 Hottest Korean Women
GO

Leona Lewis Has Got Some Big Ass Tits
GO

DIY Wall of DEATH? Why Not?
GO

Julia Roberts is Still Looking Like She Would Enjoy My Penis Inside Her
GO

I Really Wanna Play Some Mario Kart
GO

Make Some Use of That Webcam Grammy Bought You For Your Birthday
GO

Well Hello There Melina
GO

I’m Already Praying For Kendra Wilkinson’s Unborn Child
GO

Psycho Killer Asylym – The Movie
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Leo Dicaprio’s Penis Must Be Crying Today
GO

Lesbian Sex For Bill Clinton’s Friends? Paris Hilton May Have Some Explaining to Do
GO

Liz Hurley Panty Peek
GO

Jesus Christ Beyonce is Looking good Lately
GO

Cameron Diaz is Going to Die a Lonely Cougar
GO

I See Hollywood is Well On It’s Way to Ruining the Joan Jett Movie
GO

Hey Mel B, If Your Husband Says He Loves Your Body, He’s Lying to You
GO

Girls Who Like to Fight
GO

Heidi Honey is Topless
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Calm the Fuck Down, It’s Just a Rollercoaster
GO

Who Would Run Away From This Hot Bitch
GO

A MILF and Two Lesbian Baseball Honeys
GO

Shawna Less Has Something to Show You
GO

Sandra Lou Needs a Razor
GO

Fuel Economy? What Fuel Economy?
GO

Paris Hilton’s Dogs Live in a Nicer House Than You Do
GO

India Reynolds is Naked
GO

Tits, Ass and a Pussy
GO

She is Gettin’ Her Webcam On Alright
GO

Jenna Jameson Looks Disgusting
GO

Aria Valentino is Working Out Topless
GO

Elephant Versus Ostrich
GO

I Don’t Care How Hot she Is, The More Megan Fox Talks, The Dumber She Looks
GO

Partly Cloudy Looks Kind of Awesome
GO

Creepy Dirty Video….
GO

Brad Pitt Obviously Has More Money Than He Knows What to Do With
GO

Now Here’s a Red Head I Could Get Into
GO

Cheers to You, Prick
GO

The Biggest Cleavage Collection You’ll See All Day
GO

NSFW Rear-View Mirror to Cover Your Perv Ass
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

10

Jun

Gisele’s Naked Body Tattooed in a Magazine of the Day

The only thing more disgusting than one of those inked up alternative models naked and pierced and tattooed for guys who have no standards because those whores have no business being naked, but only have business being whores, because whores don’t have to be hot, they just have to get naked for sites like suicide girls, is supermodels who look like dudes naked and pretending to be tattooed.

Posted in:Gisele Bundchen|Naked|Tattoo

2009

10

Jun

Posh Spice and Her Fat Nipple of the Day

Posh Spice’s nipple is hard, but not as hard as her stern look. She makes me feel like I’ve been a bad boy and that I am in trouble, a lot like my foster mother did when I was growing up. Only difference is that my foster mother used to make me eat her out everytime I did something wrong, or sometimes she’d get me to slide my 10 year old arm up inside her, which I thought was weird, considering she was religious, but I guess when priests fuck little boys, there’s nothing wrong with other people of God doin’ it to and the one thing I can say is that I’m glad her husband just sat in the corner and jerked off and didn’t join in, cuz otherwise, shit woulda got weird and I’d be one of those weird molested kids you see crying on Oprah, where as Posh Spice doesn’t even know I exist.

Posted in:Hard Nipple|Posh Spice

2009

10

Jun

Fergie and Her Body Don’t Belong Together of the Day

I don’t understand what the what the deal is with Fergie’s head. I am not talking about the head she used to hustle when she was scrounging the LA streets for her next hit of meth, or the head that she used to get the Black Eyed Peas to hire her to make them famous, or the head she gives herself in the bathroom at night as part of her workout regimen, I am talking about the head on her body that belongs on a fuckin’ dude, and a body that belongs naked, in video, getting fisted, while squatting. It is tight, it is nice, it is worth fucking from behind…

Posted in:Fergie|Sparkles

2009

10

Jun

Kristin Cavallari Does the Heather Graham of the Day

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari|Ripped Dress