I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

12

May

Taryn Manning is the Crackwhore of the Day

You may remember Taryn Manning, she’s the haggard lookin’ whore from the movie 8 Mile. She’s also got some lesbian rock band with her brother, a clothing line and is into other shit like getting high, drunk and having sex with random men as long as they tell her she’s the prettiest girl in the world. I don’t know about the last part, but she’s definitely got a pretty hard fucking face that reminds me of street whores who are down on their luck, have daddy issues, and who beg me to tell them they are pretty before sticking it in them, so I’m posting it as fact.

I know people who find her hot, I always found her vile and I have even taken our friendship to facebook, where she was a cunt to me. so I can’t stand her.

Speaking of facebook, I just added some random girl who wrote “do we know each other” or something along the lines of “why the fuck are you randomly adding me you fucking creepy motherfucker” but the nicer version.

This is what I wrote back, but suggest you don’t, if you want to make the friend. We call this being a social chainsaw….

Not officially. I mean I jerk off to your profile picture everyday and I figured I’d add you and see what else you have to offer.

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

Here are some pictures of a dirty little irrelevant whore…who I am sure you’d fuck but spend the next 6-8 weeks lookin’ at your dick pretty fucking closely to make sure nothin’ pops up. Word.

Posted in:Uncategorized

2009

12

May

Jessica Simpson Short Shorts Perform

Jessica Simpson looked pretty fucking dumpy in a pair of short shorts while performing. I know she’s an idiot, but you’d think she be able to wrap her little head around the concept of pants. This isn’t Dukes of Hazards anymore, you’re old and just because you aren’t a mom doesnt mean you don’t look like you’ve had a few kids. Embrace your post-pregnancy lookin’ body, settle down, and put on some fucking pants. You pig.

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Short

2009

11

May

stepLINKS of the Day

I go to the rich person dog park to watch the Filipino help walk the rich people dogs because it reminds me that my life may be shit, but at least it doesn’t involve picking up another family’s dog’s shit when I am not dealing with their bratty fucking kids who treat me like shit, all for less than minimum wage because I don’t have my work papers and I wouldn’t dare ask for more, or my boss will threaten to deport me. The land of opportunity my fucking ass. I am sure this is not the dream life they dreamt of when mopping floors in the Philippines before making the move here. I also go for the young rich pussy, I am sure it smells nicer than the garbage I’m used to.

Here are my stepLINKS.

Monday’s Just Got a Little Easier
GO

Cher Squeezed Her Granny Vagina into One of HEr 80’s Get Ups and It Ain’t Half Bad
GO

Black Sabbath Fan Freak Out
GO

The 22 Hottest Stripper Videos From Movies
GO

Gateway Pretty Much Makes the Creepiest Father-Daughter Commercials Ever
GO

Stanley Kubricks Long Lost Master Piece
GO

Did You Know? Probably Not, Because You Don’t Know Shit
GO

Avril Lavigne is Getting Fat
GO

Penistron is Exactly What it Sounds Like
GO

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!
GO

Leighton Meester Bikini Shots
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Jesus Christ Spencer Pratt Thinks He Is a Rapper Now?
GO

Shit is About to Get REALLY Nasty in Mel Gibson’s Family
GO

President Obama, Meet Natalie Portman’s Nipples
GO

Beyonce is Just a Tad too Dramatic Sometimes
GO

Katy Perry Wants Grampa Peen
GO

I Hope Nick Cannon and Eminem Fight to the Death
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

A Japanese Prank That Never Ends
GO

Haylie Marie Just Loves the Desert
GO

Cop Runs Over a Biker – VIDEO
GO

Luci is Unchained
GO

Katie Price’s Used of Vadge is Back on the Market
GO

Justine Timberlake is a Mother Lover
GO

Now Here’s Some Cars You Don’t See Everyday
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Jessica Simpson’s Gut is Almost the Size of Mine
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audrina Patridge is See Through
GO

Wlecome to the Pussy Show
GO

Padma Lakshmi Saluted the President By Basically Showing Him Her Tits
GO

Adela Just Made My Day a Whole Lot Better
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AHHHHHH Bar Rafaeli
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Jenya Shows It All Off
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One of the Sluts Who One Flavor of Love Has a Sex Tape
GO

Wolverine in 30 Seconds
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She Probably Just Made His Day
GO

Boy George is Out of Jail
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The 7 Creepiest Products Found in an Everyday Drug Store
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And Now, Some Dancing Pregnant Whores
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Some Vegas Pussy in Crochet Bikini
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ROGUE COLLECTORS PHOTOBUCKET FINDS
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

11

May

Leighton Meester is in a Bikini on the Beach of the Day


I saw these pictures earlier, but had no idea who this bitch is, so I didn’t bother posting them, then I realized that everyone fucking posted them and in trying to fit in with other celebrity sites, because they are run by fuckin’ cool people that don’t make me feel uncomfortable, or awkward or a little nervous about their social skills, that exude cool and never desperation as they talk about breasts in a way that makes me believe they may or may not have ever seen a set.

Either way, here she is, next time I’ll let the bikini do the talking and I won’t ignore any bitch who is wearing one. I failed you. Get used to it.

Posted in:Ass|Beach|Bikini|Leighton Meester

2009

11

May

Amy Fisher’s Tits to Exxxotica in Miami of the Day

Remember the Amy Fisher/Joey Buttafuoco story from the 90s, where he was banging her at 16 when she was in her prime and she couldn’t deal with the fact that he was married, so she shot his bitch wife in the head and got charged with assault, making every man who hates his wife, including myself, realize there is a way out and that way is with hot young pussy.

She spent close to a decade in jail, only to come out and launch a porn career years after she really should have, but I guess in support of girls who let me watch them fuck other dudes in video, I can’t hate on it, even if it took a little too long to happen by my standards.

She was at the Exxxotica bullshit event in Miami this past weekend, the same one who didn’t email me an invitation, and she hosted some Mother’s Day MILF competition with a couple of paid hookers/models to make it look like real MILF’s signed up to compete, because Exxxotica are fucking scam artists who manipulate the truth for overall effect..and here are the pics.

Posted in:Amy Fisher|Exxxotica Miami|Porn|Tits

2009

11

May

Audrina’s Fake Titties in a White Dress of the Day

Audrina may be useless, but her tits aren’t. Here are some pictures of them holding up a dress for Mother’s Day and her birthday. I wonder what else they can do. I am thinking act as a pretty good punching bag that I’d like to take out all my rage on, hopefully leaving her passed out in the gutter, naked and crying, or maybe as a nice landing pad for my cum after I’m done hate fucking her. I know I have nothing really interesting to say about her, but that’s because there’s nothing interesting about her and all I’m left with is frustration about why I’m not Audrina Patridge and no matter how long I close my eyes wishing that I was, I always see the same disgusting reflection in the mirror. So if anything, maybe Audrina isn’t useless, because she’s succeeded at making me hate myself more than I already do. Happy Fucking Birthday, Cunt.

Here is the video of her and her fake tits…..

Posted in:Audrina Patridge|Fake Tits|Implants

2009

11

May

Adriana Lima’s Tits Pose with Perfume of the Day

Someone told me that Adriana Lima is pregnant. That’s okay, I had no real chance with her anyway. I like to think it’s gotta do with the language barrier, or with the fact that our people and their people just don’t get along, but the truth is that I’m probably not her type, and let’s be real, I’ve never crossed paths with her, so it was obviously not meant to be. Plus she’s too fuckin’ religious and boring. I like my models and celebrities addicted to sex, drugs and the party, not addicted to Jesus. Sure, the whole virgin from Brazil because of her deep passion for the Catholic church was kinda hot in theory, but not as hot as her tits. Here she is promoting some bullshit for her keepers at Victoria Secret, you know, because they own her.

Posted in:Adriana Lima|Perfume|Tits

2009

11

May

Kim Kardashian on TV Gets Called Fat of the Day

Kim Kardashian was on some LA morning talk show to promote her bullshit workout DVD because she is fat and has no business telling girls how to maintain their bodies, unless of course this is all some corporate scam that McDonald’s in behind where they try to get people even more obese that they already are, but I doubt that is the case.

The highlight of the video is not seeing Kardashian doing her stupid commonly used exercises, but when the newscaster says that she doesn’t have an anorexic body and you see the pain in her eyes from the gentle dis.

Either way, watch it.

Posted in:Fat|Kim Kardashian

2009

11

May

Padma Lakshmi’s Nipple and Scar of the Day

Here’s that Padma chick from TV rockin’ a sheer dress. I don’t really know what’s going on but can’t help focusing on her scar. I remember hearing about people who were into medical injuries sexually and I never really got it, shit just reminds me of a sewed up vagina in the wrong place on her body, and sewed up vagina, although hot in theory, you know like unwrapping a christmas gift before gettin’ down to business, like a tightly wrapped treat needed to be disassembled before fully being enjoyed, is pretty fuckin’ disgusting in reality.

I wonder how she got it. Was she in a knife fight on the streets of Mumbai, or maybe she was a terrorist who was tortured for information, or a spy who was held hostage and escaped by sacrificing her arm, what I do know is that if this is a tennis injury, I’ll be pretty fucking disappointed.

Here are her nipples….

Posted in:Nipple|Padma Lakshmi|Scar

2009

11

May

Jessica Simpson’s Tits Perform of the Day

Jessica Simpson and I have a very one-sided relationship. She posts shit on twitter. I write back. She doesn’t answer. Which is really nothing I’m not used to. I figured a huge percentage of the girls I have come across in my life have ignored me but that never stopped me from following them home, climbing up their fire escape and jerking off to them sleeping.

Here she is showing off some tit in concert, because when tits are all you have going for you, you better rock a low-cut shirt every chance you get, because tits are like some optical illusion that make us think you’ve got a purpose, at least one deeper rooted than being your father’s personal little fuckslut he made with his own cum and brought-up his own fuckin’ way, training her from a young age all the little tricks he likes. You know how it is.

Now – Let’s send this link to Jessica Simpson over twitter, and see if she blocks me.

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Perform|Tits