I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

23

Apr

Ali Lohan is Not Hot of the Day

Here’s ugly duckling Ali Lohan out and about wherever the fuck she is. I am not sure why I am posting it, but she’s ugly. It reminds me of this thin-lipped long chinned lesbian who used to play Rugby and who I always lost to in beer chugging contests at one of the local bars I used to frequent. I never really got over that loss, but the real thing I never got over was that the thin-lipped long chinned rugby playing lesbian wasn’t actually a lesbian and would constantly have dirty man sex with guys she met at the same bar I used to frequent. I never could grasp how a dude could fuck a chick who looked like a dude and acted like a dude as she burped, farted and challenged us to arm wrestling matches like some kind of tomboy who was more boy than the average tomboy , but I guess guys have no standards and like a chick they can kick it with. I am not one of those guys. I remember laughing in her face this day I saw her wearing a dress and she punched me in the face. I bled and she jumped on the table and roared like some kind of wrestler…a wrestler who looked a lot like Ali Lohan.

Posted in:Ali Lohan|Ugly

2008

23

Apr

From the Forum of the Good

Forums are for losers, people who have forums are bigger losers so go to the forum and take advantage of all the shit a bunch of losers have uploaded. Truth is, I like the losers in the forum, they are a good kind of loser and we’ve finally landed a girl who poses in her underwear for us…Clementine, I’m talking to you….

Here’s a glimpse into what’s going on in the Forum…


Goldfrapp – Happiness
GO

The Rapture – Out of the Races
GO

Linkin Park Acoustic Christmas
GO

Air – Moon Safari 10th Anniversary Special Edition
GO

Pre-Release Sasha – The emFire Collection
GO

Allman Brothers Box Set
GO

Art Brut – Bang Bang Rock and Roll
GO

Brian Setzer and the Tomcats
GO

New Young Pony Club – Fantastic Playroom
GO

Hot Chip – Coming On Strong
GO

The Complete Stone Roses
GO

White Stripes — Self-Titled
GO

Rolling Stone’s 500 Greatest Songs of All TIme
GO

Labor In Vain – Feeling Herself
GO

Some Meat Curtains
GO

More Random Wenches
GO

Asses That You’ll Never Bang
GO

Keeley Hazel (NSFW)
GO

———–Software————-

Kingdia Video Converter
GO

ZipGenius
GO

———-pics————

McDonalds Makes You Fat
GO

McTerrorist
GO

Natalie Portman Golden Shower
GO

————-video———–

Get a Chicken Samich and Some Waffle Fries!
GO

—————other shit —————–

Jordin Sparks is a fat Bitch
GO

Who is This Slut and Does Anyone Have More of Her?
GO

Which Girl Would YOU Choose?
GO

Suckle on My Teet You Sick Fuck….
GO

Sex Injuries….
GO

Italian Porn Request
GO

Posted in:Forum

2008

23

Apr

Gisele Bundchen’s Tit in DT Magazine

I just wrote about how Alessandra Ambrosio being a pregnant Brazilian with big pregnant lady tits is nothing to get off to, but Brazilian tranny porn is. Part of me hates saying that this slut Gisele is a tranny because everyone says that shit all the time and it’s repetitive, but the truth is that no one I know finds her hot and like to reference Leonardo DiCaprio’s time with her as an experimental time in his life. I also like to say that she reminds Tom Brady of the those college football initiation days, when he would shove a broom stick up his ass while jerking off for his teammates before showering in their cum in the lockerroom before washing up together and goin’ out for a beer to fuck bitches together….Either way, this tranny has a tit and it’s distracting us from her busted up mug, so enjoy it, cuz it’s not gay if she looks like a girl, at least that’s what everyone I know who’s been sucked off by trannies have always said to me and I believe them….because they have no reason to lie to me, it’s like once you openly tell someone you’ve got off to a tranny you’ve pretty much divulged your deepest darkest secret and there’s little worse than that…I don’t know what I am talking about but I do hate you…and if that doesn’t make this post better…I don’t know what does.

Posted in:Gisele Bundchen|Photoshoot|Tits

2008

23

Apr

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Pregnant Tits of the Day

I love how all these fuckin’ virgins get all excited when a pregnant chick shows up with her cleavage exposed because her tits are miraculously bigger. It’s like seeing a teenage kid who just hit puberty on the beach amongst girls in bikinis. Their excitement makes no fuckin’ sense to me, maybe it’s because I know the condition her pussy will be in in 9 months, or maybe it’s cuz I don’t like lookin’ at fat chicks with big tits because I don’t like fat tits or maybe it’s because big tits usually mean sloppy asses. The truth is that getting off to a pregnant chick is some twisted shit and a losers sport. I have a hard enough time fucking a hooker knowing she slammed a guy an hour before me so thinking about a dude beating me to the prize and the proof is showing in her fat uterus that I am trying to cum inside really messes with my head.

The good news is that despite how twisted I am and how much I enjoy watching girls breast feed their babies in public, I can die knowing that I am not as sexually fucked up as I am accused of while all these other sick seemingly normal virgins fucks are jerking off to knocked up Brazilian bitches and I’m at home watching Brazilian tranny porn, because there’s nothing more normal than watching a hot chick with a dick getting sucked off by another hot chick.

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|Pregnant|Tits

2008

23

Apr

Academy Award Winning Three 6 Mafia’s New Sexy Video of the Day

There’s nothing I like more than seeing a group of hip hop stars who have won an Academy Award come out with a legendary tune with such inspirational lyrics like “I like having sex but I’d Rather Get Some Head”.

The video is filled with a bunch of half naked sluts showing off their asses, simulating sex and doing all things strippers do and that’s fine by me. I figure if I was a band all my videos would be pornographic, it’s really what the people want to see and Hip Hop is all part of the reason little white girls are suckin’ dicks in the back of their boyfriend’s mom’s BMW X5.

Posted in:Music Video|Porn|Three 6 Mafia

2008

23

Apr

Natalie Portman Gets Pissed on By a Dog of the Day

Everyone loves Natalie Portman and here she is getting pissed on. It’s like some virgin loser trying to mark her as his territory because he’s obsessed with her and doesn’t want other virgin losers getting too close, only in this case, it’s just a dog who doesn’t give a fuck about her and figures that her ratty ass coat smells like something that deserves to be pissed on. I guess this is funnier than seeing a bitch get shit on by a bird, but it’s not as funny as seeing me piss on Natalie Portman. The truth is that despite being willing to piss on this bitch, I don’t really give a fuck about this bitch, she bores me and when everyone talks about how hot she is it makes me question my sexuality a little, even though I’d be willing to piss on any bitch.

Like this past weekend, I was hanging with some really sleazy guy, who has orgies with his buddies and fucks any pussy that comes his way and dude would freak out even over the most average bitch. I am talking girls who look like moms with big mom asses or teenage girls who hadn’t hit puberty yet. He was on the prowl and every single girl who walked by was a fuckin’ b-girl or worse. Every time a hot girl would walk by and I’d tell him that that’s the kind of pussy he should be staking out, her would say something about how they only want money and designer clothes and are snobby bitches. So I spent the day watching him cat call chicks who looked like dogs and it made me go home thinking there was something wrong with me, because when I get my creep on, I try to make sure it’s for someone worth creeping on where he was just into anything with a pussy, that’s when my fat wife waddled into the room and I realized that I guess I shouldn’t judge him, considering I really have no fuckin’ standards, even though I pretend I do when I am out in public…..

Here’s Natalie Portman getting pissed on…..

Posted in:Dog Piss|Natalie Portman

2008

23

Apr

Kim Kardashian is Working Out of the Day

Here are some pictures of Kim Kardashian having a much needed workout.

I guess the truth hurts because she’s actually taking it to actually exercising. The funniest thing about these pictures is that I’ve been calling Kim Kardashian a fat pig for the last 6 months and I continuously get hate for it, but the second Paris Hilton says bitch has cottage cheese legs, she starts working out like some kind of high school girl who got a nose job cuz the pretty girl said she had a big nose. It’s some low self esteem shit that would explain the emotional eating of ice cream that got her in this situation to begin with and reality is that she should have been doing this long time ago, but all you cocksuckers encouraged her to eat more and said her fat was hot and that if anyone thought otherwise, they were into little boys, but it just took those cutting words from someone she thinks matters to get her off the ice cream.

What that means is that Kim Kardashian, along with the rest of the world, values Paris Hilton’s evil words more than they value my evil words, even though she is a stupid, useless cunt. Society tells us to listen to people like her, who have money and celebrity, that’s why the politicians are trying to get as many endorsements as possible, including Heidi Montag, a bitch who is worth less than her fuckin’ breast implants, while the assholes like you and me, who are probably much better suited to make statements about reality since we don’t live in a fuckin’ fantasy, are expected to worship the cocksuckers and everything that comes out of their mouth. They are even trying to get us to jerk off to them in their sex tapes, trying to infiltrate us from all angles, even in the fuckin’ porn we watch despite us knowing they suck harder than regular porn and not in a good way, we still watch because they are rich and known. I guess it’s all part of the brainwash process.

But at least someone’s finally put this fat ass whore to work…..

Posted in:Kim Kardashian|Working Out

2008

23

Apr

Megan Fox With a Fox of the Day

I am not some kind of art fag and I generally don’t make commentary on the way someone takes a picture, makes a video or whatever the fuck takes some level of artistic vision, because I honestly couldn’t care less. But when I look at these pictures of Megan Fox with an actual fox, I get offended by the lack of thought that went into the fuckin’ picture. I wonder who set up this fuckin’ shoot, maybe it was a 3 year old consulting the photographer saying “Fox” and pointing to a picture of a fox while he knew he had to shoot Megan Fox and was like “why didn’t I think of that” or some shit. The truth is I fuckin’ hate literal images, like videos that pretty much explain what I am lookin’ at or listening too like I am some kind of fuckin’ retarded kid in a helmet running into the fuckin’ wall.

The only time this kind of thing would be acceptable is if they had Jennifer Lopez posing with a migrant border jumpin’ beaner cleaning her hotel room, or maybe a Paris Hilton video of her in a Hilton Hotel that they were about to implode in order to build a new state of the art building because it’s old and haggard, but that’s just cuz I think her time’s expired and we need a new one. I guess it’d be ok if there were pictures of Miley Cyrus posing with 300 Iranian dudes named Cyrus and by posing I mean being jerked of on by….

Either way, here’s Megan Fox with a Fox and an example of the shittiest creative vision in this photoshoot.


A reader sent in a video of his song and it pretty much sums up what I’m saying…..
GO

Posted in:Fox|Literal|Megan Fox

2008

23

Apr

stepLINKS of the Day

Jade from yesterday’s stepLINKS wrote me back:

This is what pisses me off. I admit that I like sex. Why do I have to be looked down upon in society because I believed it when guys told me they loved me and were instead showing their friends the pictures and videos of us? My senior year of high school I slept with about 60 guys, including our school’s PE teacher. Does that make me a slut?
I really don’t think guys would have done this if they weren’t so influenced by pop culture and other stereotypes. These guys love to “hit it and quit it” because they think it makes them cool.
I’m disappointed that you have this website because I can tell by your writing that you are a very intelligent person.

This was my response:

Jade,

Are you going to send me those pics and videos or not. I am kinda losing my patience/interest and the truth is I love sluts….even if they’ve banged 60 guys in one year during highschool. I don’t even know 60 people. You should really get paid for your hard work.

With Love,
Jesus Martinez
Drunkenstepfather.com

Here are my links:


Some Hometown Hottie Chick Named Christina Dancing With Her Massive Tits
GO

Kim Kardashian’s Huge Tits and No Make Up Still Make her a Slut
GO

The Best 30 Seconds of Your Day
GO

These Party Sluts Won’t Look At You in Real Life, But At Least This Way You Can Look At Them
GO

Some Penny Cruz Nude Scenes From Her Upcoming Flick
GO

Lindsay Lohan is a Jealous Lesbian
GO

Carmen Electra Gets Chicks to Do Upskirts For Her
GO

Long Hair to Pull
GO

Your Girlfriend Always Fakes It, But Here’s How to Find Out For Sure
GO

The Girls of Deal or No Deal Shake Their Asses
GO

And While You Look At Them, WHy Not Jerk Off in the Process?
GO

I Guess I Have More in Common With Monkeys Than I Thought
GO

The World’s Largest Breasts
GO

A Lorna Van Herde Photoshoot
GO

Julie Orden is a Natural Beauty
GO

Some Hot Celeb Chicks Hang Out at a Boring Party
GO

Find Girls Who May Fuck You
GO

Heather Mills Used to High Class Escort
GO

Kim Kardashian Wipes the Skank Off
GO

Emily Rossum Lookin’ Good at Some Bullshit Fashion Party
GO

Liz Hurley is Lookin’ a Bit Over the Hill, But Still Bangable
GO

Speaking of Bangable, Here’s Christie Brinkley and Her Daughter
GO

Naked Unknown of the Day
GO

Madonna’s Jail Bait Daughter is Going to Be Hot in a Year or Two
GO

I Swear I Get Hynotized By Ass Shakers
GO

Tampon Tea is the Next Japanese Delicacy
GO

Some Porn, Because I Love You
GO

Your Mom Sent Me This From Your Last Sleepover. Homo
GO

Today’s Lesbian Fantasy
GO

Ali Lohan to Follow In Her Very Talented Sister’s Footsteps and By Talented, I Mean Slutty, Drug Addicted, Mess
GO

That’s Right Baby, Bend Over
GO

Iveta Stares Out the Window, While You Stare at Her
GO

I Want to Punch Tila Tequila in the Face, But Here’s Some Pics of Her Anyways
GO

The Lovely, Lovely Lucy
GO

The Olive Garden Chicks Are Actually Going to Pose in Playboy
GO

The Tyoe of Secretary I Dream of Making Love To. Until Then, I Am My Own Secretary and Make Love to Myself
GO

Some Russian Politician is Marrying This Hot Bitch
GO

Stacy Dash in Playboy
GO

Some Cougar’s Flickr Pics (must sign in to see)
GO

Designer Gas Masks By Paris Hilton
GO

Sandee Westgate’s Juno Review Cuz Sluts Know What Teenage Pregnancy is All About
GO

Miranda Kerr Does Catalog Pics
GO

I ruin Hipster Social Climbing Slut’s Lives and Their Sexual Relationships with DJs
GO

Top 12 Sandra Bullock Movie Titles That Describe Her Recent Car Accident
GO

Redskins Cheerleaders Do Cricket
GO

Some Soon to Be Drafted Sports Dude Named Sam Kellar and His Hot Girlfriend’s Personal Pics
GO

Some Girl Posted a Bullshit Breast Implant Story on Youtube
GO

My Plastic Surgeon Homeboy Posted His Response to Her Lies Because He Can’t Let Her Ruin the Breast Implant Industry
GO

FROM PHOTOBUCKET

Some Nasty Tits and a Pussy
GO

Some Slut Being a Slut in Her Slutty Clothes
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

BONUS – Some Daily Show Obama Action for Primary Day….

Part 1 –

Part 2 –

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

22

Apr

Jessica Simpson Sluts Out With Food of the Day

I never really incorporated sex into food, except for the occasional time I convinced whatever girl I was with to shove a beer bottle in her cooch, but that always took too much energy and insertion shit is pretty gross cuz you don’t know where the fuck the found object came from and seeing a condom on anything makes it look ridiculous and unsexy, especially when that anything is a bottle, food, or whatever the fuck bitch is shoving up in her.

My wife recently wanted to bring food into our sex life that I like to think is non-existent but sometimes I fuck up and give into my natural urges, but in all fairness food’s not so much a fetish for her, it just seems like more of a hobby she really digs, so the food is only licked off each other when she spills the shit and can’t let a morsel go to waste. I wonder if that’s how you spell mosel. It’s a pretty gay word.

Here’s Jessica Simpson singing for her love Tony Romo on his birthday, where they playfully make a mess out of the cake with each other and make out with their mouths full. Having a filled up mouth is a pretty common scenario that Jessica Simpson is use to because it’s the only way her boyfriends can shut the bitch up, because whenever she talks it makes them question why they are doing what they are doing until taking another glimpse of her tits.

This whole thing makes me thing of Nick Lachey and their wedding that ended in misery, but then again, everything makes me think of Nick Lachey, he’s so dreamy…..I guess that gay started with the word morsel and built up to this. I’d apologize but why bother….no one’s reading this anyway….

Posted in:Cake|Jessica Simspon|Slut