Dr Phil just said that his goal is to save Americans. That’s a pretty lofty goal, especially compared to my goal which is to not die in my sleep today. I left the house this afternoon to buy myself some meat. I figured 2 dollars of groundbeef and a can of cream of mushroom soup can feed a family of four when you only have 2 dollars in the bank, and by back I mean pocket because I can’t get approved for a bank account. I also got an onion because it is 30 cents of flavor baby. The guy behind me said “you never steal a man’s onion” and I assume he was coming onto me. I heard him talking to someone about his audition for a TV show. I should have asked for a stepINTERVIEW. I also saw a Jewish mom dancing to Kylie Minogue’s “I can’t get you out of my Head” while her 8 year old daughter spanked her ass, repeatedly. The whole experience was pretty surreal because everyone in the store seemed to be gettind down to Minogue, like you’re about to get down to my links you motherfucker. I spent all day finding these for you.
PS – My Traffic Hasn’t Grown in 2 years. But I have decided to come to terms with the fact that I will never be famous. Now click the fucking links. Thanks in Advance, Motherfucker.
I may hate Gawker, But I do Love DJ AM, and He’s Not Returning my Emails, so if any of you are in NYC and Love Me – Go Wait in the Hotel Lobby and Let Him Know Jesus Loves him, Not The Real Jesus Though Cuz He’s a Jew…and The Jews Killed Jesus….but Jesus Martinez, your Drunkenstepfather NOW…..
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Some Teenage Pregnancy Pics, Cuz I love Teenage Pregnancy, Even When The Girls are Brown. Jokes Aside, This Site’s Weird.
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Hooters Bikini Pageant Pictures Part 1
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Some Pretty Intense Pregnancy Pics, I Didn’t Know Asians Knew How to Love. I Thought They Were Robots.
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Some Pictures of Paris Crying Because Her World Has Come Crashing Down Since she Can’t Get into Bungalow 8, an NYC Nightclub
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Looking Good Sweetheart
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FemJoy girls Give Impotent Men Boners (kinda)
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Jennifer Anniston’s Tit Picture Didn’t Make Her Money…
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Some Slag Named Mirta Humping a Headless Mannequin.
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Some 18 year old Named Mikalah Gordon’s Cleavage
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Nudity on YouTube
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If you were 12 years old or from Singapore, You’d Find This Next Level Funny
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Lohan Gets Her Tit Grabbed by her Retarded Boyfriend
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This is Lara Roxx. She is the Pornstar who landed HIV in the Porno HIV Scare of 2005. I Guess She Gives Handjobs Now.
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Some Slag Showing Off Her Pole Dance Skills in the Comfort of her Living Room. Classy.
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This is the stepPICTURE of the Day
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The Sutherland’s Are Out Signing Autographs for Fans, What Confuses Me Is Where these Ebay Vendors Get All The Shit for them To Sign on Such Short Notice….
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Own Your Own Sutherland Autograph
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Nicole Richie’s Whore of a Mother’s Other Daughter. We Call Her the Less Fortunate One cuz Lionel Didn’t Adopt Her Ass, But you can jerk off to it.
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Girl Riding Girl like She was a Donkey
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Anna Semenovich is a Nice Strong Russian Mail Order Bride of a Woman
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Flickr Profile Called Binky Girls- A Lot Of Sluts
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Heidi Klum, Her Mangled Man, Singer of Bush, Gwen No Doubt Together with babies In Tow
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Celebrities Coming In and Out of Clubs/Restaurants
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Katie Fey’s Got Bush and I think Bush is Hot
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LastNightsParty’s Got an Update
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Sega Ad In the 90s is Pretty Fuckin Dirty
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Bansky Street Art of the Day
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This is My Favortie T-Shirt
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What the Fuck is This?
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Scarlett Johansson Black Dahia Premiere Gallery
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Sweet Blonde Sophie is Showin’ Off Her Box cuz She’s a Whore
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Yeah Dude, Alanis is Totally Not a Bull Dyke, She Just Rides Motorbikes.
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Dr Phil Said a Stay at Home Mom Works the Equivalent of 2 Full Time Jobs, I say Add Me to Myspace Fuckers….
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