You are a Virgin, Richard Branson owns Virgin, his son is probably not a Virgin, he looks like the kind of guy sluts like Lohan and Paris are going to be throwing their vagina’s at because the son of a billionaire is always more appealing than some hack rockstar or actor. Trust funds are cooler than hard earned money. Either way, I am more interested in Grandpa Billionaire’s tits, if I wasn’t impotent, I’d titty fuck the motherfucker and it wouldn’t be gay, but that’s just how I am livin’. Don’t believe me, I am just telling you what you want to hear.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

Sometimes I wake up at 2 pm, fully clothed on the floor of my kitchen with salsa dried up on my face. Those are the days where I feel like this site is a huge waste of my fucking time, and I know you guys are annoyed of my bitching about how much I suck, but it’s kinda what I do. I am not depressed or hating on myself, I am just bored of this shit. There’s nothing happening, the site’s less popular than it was last year, I make no money, and I hate celebrity shit. I haven’t made out with Lohan or been invited to any celebrity parties. I emailed American Apparel once for an ad deal and they never returned my call.

Maybe that’s the problem, I am posting on shit I don’t care about, just trying to get traffic. But then, I sober up and realize, I really have nothing better to do with my time. Kinda like this slut Beckham. She made her money 10 years ago and since Spice Girls, hasn’t done shit and by shit I mean have 5 babies. The difference between me and Beckham is that I am 300 lbs, mexican, poor and unaccomplished, but other than that, we’re kinda the same person. That’s the story I heard. Now go fuck yourself. Thanks in advance.

Bonus: Victoria Beckham with her Kids….and by Kids I Mean Tits

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

Sometimes I wake up at 2 pm, fully clothed on the floor of my kitchen with salsa dried up on my face. Those are the days where I feel like this site is a huge waste of my fucking time, and I know you guys are annoyed of my bitching about how much I suck, but it’s kinda what I do. I am not depressed or hating on myself, I am just bored of this shit. There’s nothing happening, the site’s less popular than it was last year, I make no money, and I hate celebrity shit. I haven’t made out with Lohan or been invited to any celebrity parties. I emailed American Apparel once for an ad deal and they never returned my call.

Maybe that’s the problem, I am posting on shit I don’t care about, just trying to get traffic. But then, I sober up and realize, I really have nothing better to do with my time. Kinda like this slut Beckham. She made her money 10 years ago and since Spice Girls, hasn’t done shit and by shit I mean have 5 babies. The difference between me and Beckham is that I am 300 lbs, mexican, poor and unaccomplished, but other than that, we’re kinda the same person. That’s the story I heard. Now go fuck yourself. Thanks in advance.

Bonus: Victoria Beckham with her Kids….and by Kids I Mean Tits

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

I have decided that I don’t like sluts. I like classy ladies. I have never been drawn to girls who look like hookers/strippers because my mind starts playing tricks on me to the point where all I can smell is syphilis in the air when I am with them. Most guys are busy tucking their boners into their pants, trying to hide the fact that all they want to do is fuck the shit out of them, while I backburner the shit and try to avoid further conversation so that I can go home and question my sexuality on my blog. Eliza Dushku looks like a total piece of stripper trash in her ripped jeans and whore boots and all I can smell is syphilis. Thanks.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

I have decided that I don’t like sluts. I like classy ladies. I have never been drawn to girls who look like hookers/strippers because my mind starts playing tricks on me to the point where all I can smell is syphilis in the air when I am with them. Most guys are busy tucking their boners into their pants, trying to hide the fact that all they want to do is fuck the shit out of them, while I backburner the shit and try to avoid further conversation so that I can go home and question my sexuality on my blog. Eliza Dushku looks like a total piece of stripper trash in her ripped jeans and whore boots and all I can smell is syphilis. Thanks.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

Jude Law dresses like a 16 year old girl and this concludes my first post that has no vagina in it. Making it by default the Gayest Stepfather Post of the day.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

Jude Law dresses like a 16 year old girl and this concludes my first post that has no vagina in it. Making it by default the Gayest Stepfather Post of the day.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

I would like to start off this post by saying I fucking hate Italy, Soccer and Italy Soccer Fans. Those motherfuckers were honking all fucking night and I think it is the reason I had my little incident with that slut who ripped the sleeve off my shirt. I don’t watch soccer and I don’t care about European sports. In fact, I don’t care about any sports. What I do care about though is jackasses with flags strapped to their car and a heavy hand on the horn. That’s all I have to say about that. Here’s Cameron Diaz with some cha-chi motherfucker who went more hip hop than Gucci, but you know her and her love for white dudes who think they’re black. Tell your friends.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted