DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2021

16

Mar

January Jones Got Them Tits On of the Day

January Jones is figuring out the whole selfie thing, that’s not to say that she wasn’t a sexter in her previous life, or her current life, I mean you become a single mother somehow and it usually involves letting dudes come in you and letting dudes come in you goes hand in hand with sending them nudes to make them want to come in you…or at least to set the mood for the evening in which they come in you….but she is old, pre-cell phone tech and old women always struggle with that whole getting nude in selfies, until realizing what the fuck else is there to do, you might as well try to get some of that sex appeal while you still got it, especially since everyone else is doing it…..

Older ladies have always been better fucks according to rumors, but that’s just because they are miserable, it feeds their pain and they don’t mind being shameless, because what have they go to lose…

I feel that January Jones is on that kick, if she doesn’t use her tits like she did on the casting couch, in her 40s, trying to stay relevant, when her tits are her best feature….then WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT OF ANYTHING.

SO as someone who doesn’t give a fuck about January Jones, here’s some of her tit for those of you who do….

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Posted in:January Jones

2021

16

Mar

The Ratio Tuesday of the Day

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Science….

I could go into more detail, but what’s the fucking point, science says girls with a waist are hotter than fat chicks, so if you’re a fat chick, figure out how to get a waist, because you can still be a fat chick under the science of The Ratio, you just need to be a fat chick built with a fucking waist….hourglass shit….

It triggers something in men at our core / in our balls / that makes us want to reproduce up inside that ratio…maybe it’s a sign of health, or the ability to birth good babies, because despite our obsession with sex and not knocking a bitch up, or obsession with sex is at our core to keep humanity alive, which I know is crazy, I mean who would want to bother doing that….but we’re wired that way and these Ratio girls are all part of the problem, or the solution, or the celebration of finding the perfect body that the feminists or inclusivity people don’t want to admit exist…but SCIENCE man…tells a different story and I don’t know about you but I’ve been told to trust science the past year and you should too…at least when it comes to knowing fatties with no ratio aren’t hot…whether they make clothing for them now or not…

Here’s some ratio…

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Posted in:The Ratio

2021

16

Mar

Jordyn Jones Ass in a Bikini of the Day

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Jordyn Jones is a professional dancer at least she probably goes by that because she was on a child dance show which I think is where her celebrity came from, but what the fuck do I know, I’ve only heard of her in the last few years and I don’t really give a fuck about the past, or how creepy it is…it’s about progress people, moving forward, new opportunities, new beginnings…I don’t know what I am saying but the Michigan white trash that was sold to the industry, is making more fucking money than I am sure she ever expected, and it’s all because she sells access to pics like this on isntagram, thanks to someone gaming Instagram stories into being like a paid porn site, that they’ll pretend isn’t porn, but that is brilliant enough of an idea that I wish I had thought of it, in part to get to see all the nudes of girls posting nudes to their fans, but also because people must have more money than ever with all this buying NFTs and Only Fans girls you’ve never heard of making 100s of thousands of dollars…like where the fuck is all this money coming from and why can’t I have any of it…

All this to say, despite having a bit of an inbred face, a potential obese gene that will lead her legless at walmart in 40 years, that ass is round and fit and able to dance, so you should like it. I mean, I do.

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Posted in:Jordyn Jones

2021

16

Mar

Victoria Justice Sex Scene of the Day

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I saw this clip last week, it’s Victoria Justice, not Victoria’s Secret, in a new acting role, where she’s clearly being naughty thanks to society being really sexed up, and the only way for a Nickelodeon star to re-invent herself, despite her huge popularity, is by doing more adult roles, even though I’ve heard the casting at Nickelodeon can be pretty adult and the whole idea that parents sign off on it, is crazy….not that it matters, since Victoria Justice is older now, her celebrity as a teen star on a show named after her has carried her all these years without working, but I guess the pandemic made her realize there’s money on the table to be GOT, and she’s out there getting it…

Along with this perverted role you Victoria Justice fans will likely jack off to, she’s also pushing a new album, and nothing like nudes to promote other shit, in this era of you ain’t nothing unless you get nude, which we are all winners on, cuz we get to see them nude!

That is why I am surprised with everyone mad at the current climate of social media, I get there’s all this whining and shit, but you gotta remember girls are getting naked at a far quicker and easier rate than ever…so many nudes to submerge yourself in….I mean just look at Victoria Justice, this is by far the hottest she’s ever been…keep on reinventing yourself girl…

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Victoria Justice

2021

16

Mar

Christa B Allen Upside Down Cameltoe of the Day

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You may not know who Christa B Allen is, but she’s been around the social media hustle for a while and by social media hustle, I mean she was getting naked or half naked on social media, because free the nipple feminism empowerment that I full fucking support, even if I think it’s fake activism and they are really just into the attention they get from being naked or the thrill they get from being naked…but if you need to intellectualize getting naked or make getting naked some activism…who fucking cares, you’re naked…whatever works…to get you naked..

She is not naked in this showing of her acrobatic yoga aerial weirdness, but she is giving us an upside down cameltoe, which in an era of right side up cameltoes, means fun.

If you’re interested in her prolific film career, all at the young age of 29, which is typically retirement age for actresses historically, well, she doesn’t really have a prolific film career and her last credit is in 2019 as “Javi’s 2nd Girl”…not his first..but his second…that like LOW hanging roles…but this upside down pussy in tight pants on tight pants tuesday shit is golden.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Christa B Allen

2021

16

Mar

Brittney Palmer at the Beach of the Day

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I don’t watch UFC, I think dude on dude half naked is a little queer, and it’s not because it gets me hard and makes me question my sexuality, it’s because half naked men beating the shit out of each other while half naked is the premise to any homosexuals fantasies…so whether you’re into UFC for the boners or for the man on man or cuz you like fighting, you’re on the spectrum of queer.

That said, I appreciate that the UFC and wrestling have introduced chicks as fighters and as ring girls because it makes the experience LESS queer…and the top or hottest of the ring girls, at least to an old fuck like me, is Brittney Palmer..but that’s probably because I only know her and Ariana Celeste as ring girls and I find her hotter.

I am pretty out of the loop on Brittney Palmer but I remember her doing art, and having a little more substance than just some random half naked…glamour model holding signs in the ring….I don’t remember her having bolt on fake tits…but apparently she does and that’s ok too…I mean who gives a fuck she’s showering in a sheer dress on the beach….oh and here’s her feet.

Posted in:Brittney Palmer

2021

16

Mar

Charlotte Lawrence Has the Nips Out of the Day

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I like to make fun of Charlotte Lawrence because she’s some rich kid who has her nipples out all of the fucking time like she’s that keen and eager to get noticed and get attention from whatever angle she can as she launches some career that she’s probably not qualified for, in her case as a popstar ,but that she’s geographically located in the right place to launch her career as a popstar, even if she doesn’t know how to pop and she isn’t a star…but she has access and she can pretend in a fake it til you make it situation….where the people who can fake it better have deep pockets and their mom and dad are sitcom producers, directors and actresses with A LOT OF MONEY…but she doesn’t look so bad with the nips out!

Posted in:charlotte lawrence

2021

16

Mar

Tight Pant Tuesday of the Day

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Tight Pants, Let’s Dance..

I think one of the more wonderful kinds of pants a woman can wear, is a pair that is tight enough for me to see their assholes puckering through, because otherwise, you’re missing out on all the fun…

I know that with COVID, coupled with girls trying to be their hottest, getting jerked off to for likes and follows, not seeing it as creepy, but rather as validation….the tight pants are more popular than ever….so that when you see a lady in a pair of illfitting sweatpants, you think ‘she must be on her period’…..because even fat girls wear tight pants, they are designed for comfort…a second skin and the only reason laziness doesn’t look like an instagram picture but instead like actual given up laziness would have to be because girl’s uterus is about to explode…and if it is not…then you know you’ve got the wrong girl…who doesn’t tight pants, let’s dance…but instead baggy pants and looks like a homeless dude….so don’t be a girl looking like a homeless dude…be like these girls, or stare at these girls, in their tight pants…doing comfort clothing right..

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Posted in:Tight Pants

2021

16

Mar

Chipotle Karen and Other Videos of the Day

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@jordanlynnmcintosh

Karen came out to play. ##chipotle ##fyp ##foryoupage ##karen

? Drive Forever – Remix – Sergio Valentino

Bike Shop Dentist

No Brakes

Enjoying Venice

Plane Crash

Stuck in the Claw Machine

Man on the Hood

DJ Dopey…..

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2021

16

Mar

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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Let’s hope that 10 percent of the population is 90 percent of the content we are seeing – because I can’t imagine people actually care as much as all the content I am being fed makes them seem to care….I am still on this kick….

I just haven’t met anyone more than VAPID in at least 15 years, it’s RARE to find someone with a brain, or passion that is anything but self involved bullshit…so I’ll assume all this highly aggressive angry shit is just nonsense because the rest of the world doesn’t actually give a fuck about all the woke, activism, making the world a better place…that’s gotta just be brainwashing and society is like “sounds good”…cuz they’re busy taking selfies or finding their own scam to get their own mansions…

All that noise is just noise, there’s nothing deeper to it…so all these people freaking out about this new world need to remember we are still shitty humans!

Here are some stepLINKS…..in the morning…kind of….not really…I am a degenerate..it’s part of the appeal…of having no appeal…

Lili Reinhart Does Old Hollywood Glam!
CLICK HERE

IG Model Analicia Chaves Spotted at a Hornets Game Sitting With LaMelo Ball’s Friends
CLICK HERE

Ronald DeFeo, Amityville Horror Killer, Dead at 69
CLICK HERE

Launching an Anvil 100 Feet into the Sky
CLICK HERE

The Woman Behind the Tanline Bikini
CLICK HERE

Porn Company Offers NCAA Tournament Players VIP Access
CLICK HERE

ALIEN Caught on Video
CLICK HERE

SURVIVING THE TSUNAMI!
CLICK HERE

The Moments That Led Up To The Tsunami!
CLICK HERE

Cam Sluts Bring the Pussy and It’s always a Good Time!
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS