I’m not fashion expert, but I am a pervert, and Audrina without heels looks like some short legged stalky piece of shit with a long torso I’d definitely still fuck despite her shortcomings, but I’d be sure to let her know how inadequate she is by pointing out all the girls around her who have proportionate bodies, so that her ego doesn’t get out of hand and her self-esteem non-existant where it belongs, cuz this whole success from The Hills shit has made her a little delusional, cuz any normal short legged girl would never have the confidence or arrogance to step out of the house dressed like this, because it is disgusting….
Audrina may be a fucking idiot with fake tits who I can’t stand because she is on The Hills, who for the most part isn’t as hot as she is hyped up to be, but she’s got a pretty good body, especially after it’s been photoshopped to shit. I guess the real shocker about this bitch is that she didn’t end up in porn or stripping, something her fake tits at a young age would make you think was part of the plan, but instead ended up on mainstream TV. I guess her dad knows people who know people or some shit, because she’s really made for taking 3 dicks at a time, but then again as far as I am concerned, every girl is made for 3 dicks at a time, I guess it’s gotta do with some tribal evolutionary shit from happened in pre-historic tribes, but they especially look ready for 3 dicks at a time while whoring out with some strawberries and appliances half-naked in a photoshoot. The other shocker is that Maxim is still in business.
I can’t stand Audrina, not that I know anything about her, but hearing her tell me how she keeps a “hot” bikini body, reminds me that she’s one of those no substance, superficial twats, who not only ignores people like me, unless they know I can get them ahead, or if I am with a hotter girl than them, not that I shouldn’t be ignored, but I’m just saying, it’s this disgusting attitude that makes me want to hate fuck these cunts and do the dirty shit to them and take a fuckin’ picture to email to them once a week as a reminder than they are nothing but a worthless whore, in this case, I’d like to jump into this video and feed that burger to her fuckin’ pussy with my fist. Not that I have anger issues, I’m just down with testing the limits of sexuality, with a dumb bitch who can’t run and tell on me, kinda the same reason I like to hook up with severly retarded women.
We don’t have Carl’s Jr here, but I used to have a friend who worked somewhere that got press packages from Carl’s Jr and everytime they’d release a burger they’d send him a cardboard cut out of it, and byt the looks of some of their burgers, you’d think just holding the cardboard cut out made you fuckin’ fatter. I used to get him to give me those cutouts so that I could torment my wife.
I’d put shit all over the house the days she announced she was going on a diet. I’d just bust it out randomly, because for her a burger was what pussy was for me, or what little boy ass is to a pedo.
I remember when we’d fuck, she’d make me put one of the burgers over my face and bitch would rock my cock better than normal, unfortunately, it’d make her hungry and she’d run out for a late night burger when I’d pass out and that was all part of her 150 pound weight gain.
It was all very fuckin’ fat, but not as fat as when she planned a solo trip to the states to experience the burger first hand and took pictures like she met the fuckin’ President or some shit.
Either way, they got Audrina to do the add, because despite having fat tits, her body’s rockin’ and a rockin’ body is a lot more appealing to market a burger than seeing some stretch-marked sloppy piece of shit of fat chick…
Yes, these are the same people that brought you Paris Hilton car wash.
Here’s their Alba commercial…
Here’s there Hot CHick on a Mechanical Bull commercial…
Wow. That’s all I have to say about Audrina trying to act. Wow…and not a good Wow…like a look at that body so I don’t have to listen and her horrible rehearsed lines that are worse that the third grade at the Christmas Pageant at the elementary school I go to every year, not because I have kids in it, or know kids in it, but because sometimes you need to divert from the stripclub for a minute and experience other stage performances, and I don’t mean that in a pedophile way, I mean in a single, lonely, desperate mothers during the holiday season being easy to fuck kind of way.
How the fuck does someone like this get work, when so many talented, better looking people are out there are struggling to make it. It just proves that life isn’t fair and fake tits, a fit body, rich parents and connections really do a lot better for you than actual skill. Ridiculous. At least it’s pretyt fucking hysterical…
Audrina brought her ugly face and tight vagina hugging pants to Australia to do some MTV bullshit, because MTV owns her robot ass, and she does everything they fucking tell her to because she doesn’t want to upset the banker. It really is a lot like prostitution, not that anyone ever had higher hopes for this bitch, everyone in her life is just just impressed she hasn’t accidentally killed herself drying her hair in the shower, or drinking draino because some told her it helps you lose weight, and by impressed I mean disappointed….
I got nothing more to say on this bitch. She does even remind me of anything worth saying, I guess just lookin’ at her makes me turn into an idiot….maybe that’s MTV’s plan to run the world by brainwashing us with her….Someone needs to put an end to this shit.
Audrina may be useless, but she still got to get into a bikini for Maxim and not look entirely bad doing it.
Sure she has a weird face and is dumber than shit, but like all Sex Dolls all you need to do is to replace her head with a new one when you save up enough money to buy the better quality one, we get it, you’re on a budget, there’s an economic crisis going on and you don’t have a job so when you had to decide whether to go with the fat body or the busted face you went with the busted face and I think you made the right choice, because you don’t fuck the face, and you can always upgrade the head. Sure she came more defective than you thought, like how my family bought a Thanksgiving Turkey that had no legs, because the second rate, cripple turkeys are cheap as hell and still fuckin’ turkey and that’s better than last year’s baked beans. If you get what I am saying….
So one day soon, after the economic crisis blows over, it won’t be as much of a struggle to believe she’s actually a real person when you attach a string to its mouth to make it look like it’s talking about politics and the economy and like it’s not actually retarded despite looking retarded, while you have one hand manning the string and the other on the big fake tit getting primed for a nice night together, with the curtains drawn, because your mom’s out on a date. You just have to wait it out and deal with the shit, before getting the gold….
Asking Audrina about politics is like asking a gerbil for it’s opinion on the genocide in Rawanda. Both are entertaining for some, but leave you little to work with. The empty whore with no soul who everyone is in love with right now is fucking useless and despite not really having any obligation to answer the canned shitty questions from the paparazzi, could at least use her platform for some insight on something, if she just knew what the definition of insight is, and for girls like Audrina, thank fucking god there’s such thing as breast implants, because without them, she’s be scared and alone in her parents house with an exciting future of marrying someone rich lined up for her. Either way, the video sucks, but I am posting it anyway.
Audrina may not be smart, or very good looking, unless of course you are the kind of guy who volunteers at institutions designed for handicapped people because you find them so fuckin’ sexy with their chronic masturbations and glassy eyed, drooling smile, but she does have a rockin’ body and I am all for girls who lack substance and beauty making up for it through working out, eating disorders and even a good set of fake tits, even if I hate fake tits, they are sometimes nice to look at if done right and despite hating everything this fake bitch stands for, I can’t dis the boob job cuz she was done proper and it’s not like I’m fucking her or paying her for lap dances and forced to suck or grab at the hard weirdness implants feel like. I’m just window shopping….
Speaking of shopping, it’s nice to see that Audrina has taken some time away from wasting her life and filling her days with spending ridiculous amounts of money on designer clothes to fill her empty life and has got into her bikini, because when you have pretty much nothing to do with your days except star in a shitty reality show I want to see hit by a terrorist attack, you might as well do it half naked.
I guess her life is one that should be envied, but that’s not saying much coming from me because I envy the weirder shit life has to offer, like the other day when drunk, I went into a gas station to grab some candy at 5 am and saw some cracked out hooker walking around in bare feet, screaming at the clerk and trying to be lead back into the cab she came from by her John and the cab driver, only to end up pissing herself and making a mess all over the floor and being abandoned by the cab. It was nice to see that she was so fucked up she had no concept of anything going on around her, the world was her to do what she wanted, when she wanted, with no fear of getting raped or killled and the conventions everyone else has to follow like having a job, being civil and wearing shoes. The whole time I was thinking to myself how much better her life was than mine, so I guess my expectations are pretty low.
I am sick and just woke up from my nap of death, unfortunately for you, whatever virus is raping me hasn’t killed me yet and I feel obliged to fuckin’ post useless pictures you have probably already seen because I am a creature of fucking habit.
I don’t find Audrina hot at all. Her mangled retard face reminds me of the time this drug addicted bitch, who coincidentally looked a lot like Audrina’s sister with all those stupid fucking tattoos that don’t manage to cover up the fact that she’s fucking ugly, but do distract us from noticing just how fucking ugly she is, kinda the same strategy Audrina uses in working out and getting fake tits,……I forgot where I was going with this….but I do know that Audrina in her retard state doesn’t know where the fuck she is and she’s turning to her sister to help her, like she did as a baby and couldn’t grasp the concept of what a fucking toilet was.
I also know that I would rather be at a pool party staring at hot bodied pussy, than dying on my shitty fucking couch.
