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Archive for the Lindsay Lohan Category

2008

15

Sep

Lohan Hit the Paparazzi of the Day

6 Comments »

Lohan punched a paparazzi in the face and everyone is making a big deal out of the shit. They don’t realize that she didn’t do it because she hates the paparazzi because they are invading her personal space or tripping her at events by cluttering her, she actually likes the paparazzi and considers them her friends and a huge part of her marketing campaign that’s why she always tips them off as to where she is going to be. She did it because she’s a fucking lesbian now, or at least pretending to be a lesbian, and she just finished reading the chapter on hating all things with a dick and doing everything you can to destroy all things with a dick in her lesbian training manual. She she’s just trying to stand her tough guy stance and she’s doing it by straight punches to faces. It’s nice to see that lesbianism hasn’t made her an angry little rat of a person, and that she’s finally at peace now that she’s found herself. I figure all she needs is a good dickin’, like some seriously hardcore fuckin sex to bring her back to that calm, drug addicted Lohan we all loved. I am sure you can relate to the frustration she’s feeling, considering you’ve spent the last couple of years trying to find ways to masturbate that simulates the sex you once had, knowing all the while that it just doesn’t feel the same as doing the real deal. I give Lohan a few more fights before she finally caves in and goes back to cock while Ronson stands on the sidelines upset that her firm controlling grip got loose….

Either way, I hope I get invited to the wedding.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Paparazzi

2008

08

Sep

Lindsay Lohan Supports Her Lesbian’s Sister’s Clothing Line Fashion Show With Her Big Tits of the Day

9 Comments »

Lindsay Lohan is a good lesbian, she doesn’t wear bras anymore, despite having massive tits, which is something I’m into right now, but won’t be when she’s a 40 year old lesbian and not just a 21 year old lesbian who looks 40, with tits that hang down to her gut who and who doesn’t wear bras, has a shaved head, rocks some flannel and some construction boots and who loves getting fucked with Dolphin shaped dildoes because penis is the fucking enemy, not that I’ll be alive, or that Lohan will still be a dyke then, but you get what I am saying, even though I don’t.

She stood by her girlfriend at her girlfriends sister’s fashion show proving that this relationship is a good publicity stunt for the whole family, not that she’s actually in a relationship, it’s all just speculation and lies and that pisses me off, so until I see a video of them going lickin’ each other’s assholes, I don’t buy this for a second and will just think of this whole Lohan Ronson thing is a bad joke, because those bitches are playing the media probably a lot harder than they are playing each other’s vaginas.

Speaking of bad jokes, I was stuck on a bus the other day because I wanted to visit a friend of mine who lived outside of town and I don’t have a car. I didn’t realize that there was some kind of construction going on that turned this 30 minute ride into a 2 hour long painful experience, I was sitting in front of some dude who was with some really busty skinny chick who I assume was his girlfriend. The entire ride he kept making bad jokes and observations of shit going on while trying to drop his one liners that were fuckin’ killing me. Every time he would speak, I’d just shake my head in disapproval. He said shit like “what’s a surfer say when he has diarrhea? Squirts Up” and the hot chick he was with would just laugh and laugh….he said shit like “What’s a Chinese guy’s favorite kind of tea? Kar-a-tea” and she was roaring, while I knew that a Chinese person’s favorite tea was Green Tea, thanks to all it’s healing properties and just wanted to punch him in the face for being a fuckin’ loser and cunt punch his girl for humoring him just to see what her box felt like.

I guess that doesn’t matter, but here are those pics of Lohan who is showing off her tits and according to rumors, knows exactly what Sam Ronson’s box feels like.

Bonus that’s Not Really a Bonus – Lohan at the VMA red carpet, lookin’ pretty fuckin’ horrible.

Posted in:Lesbian|Lindsay Lohan|Tits|Uncategorized

2008

26

Aug

Lohan and Ronson Go Out for a Family Dinner of the Day

8 Comments »

Here’s a little angry lesbian action as Sam Ronson gives the paparazzi the finger while lookin’ like Macauley Culkin or some shit. Now I like Sam Ronson and have defended her and her intentions for at least the last week. I never called her out as a social climbing socialite from a rich family who figured attaching herself to Lohan would get her more money for her DJ gigs, I never said that they probably aren’t fucking or are doing what they are doing to mess with the media because when you grow up as the kid or stepkid of some socialite mother and rockstar, you are taught at a young age what the right and wrong thing to say is, but I do think giving us all the finger is totally out of line. It’s one of those things where you like the media when they give you coverage, otherwise you wouldn’t be hanging out with Hollywood’s badgirl and you wouldn’t date or pretend to date someone so high profile, you’d attach yourself to a nice lowkey lesbian who is probably a whole lot easier to deal with than Lohan.

Beyond just giving us the finger, I ran into someone who went to some event she recently played in Montreal and he said that she ignored his attempts to meet her, she spent most of her time texting someone, and she looked like being there was the last place in the world she wanted to be, despite getting paid 30,000 dollars. In her defense, meeting random local freaks in every city is probably not something I’d be down with either, but I’m not a DJ trying to secure fans. He also told me her music sucked, her set sucked and the whole experience sucked harder than Lohan used to suck dick. The worst thing about her Montreal trip was the fact that she didn’t even reach out to me and ask me to hang so until she does, this bitch is dead to me and her bullshit flippin’ the bird for attention is just that…a cry for attention. That said, Lohan’s got some great tits.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Samantha Ronson

2008

22

Aug

Lindsay Lohan’s Got a Lesbian See Through Shirt On of the Day

6 Comments »

I think I scare Samantha Ronson because I am blocked on her facebook after spending the last 2 months sending her random stupid facebook messages and that hurt my feelings. I mean I think it’s totally normal to ask someone what Lohan’s vagina tastes like or what it smells like or if she uses a strap on. I also think it’s totally normal to ask someone you don’t know for their home address, a copy of their key and a pair of lohan’s dirty underwear to get me through my lonely night. I don’t see the harm in sending a daily message requesting pictures and video proof that they are lesbians, a used sex toy to suck on or even a sample of Lohan’s saliva to taste what kissing her would be like. I think blocking me on facebook was totally out of line considering everything I ever said was pretty normal by my standards.

Here’s Lohan braless in a barely see through shirt that bores me. I can’t even make out her nipples, not that I want to because I hate lesbians and their penis destroying ways.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|See Through

2008

21

Aug

Lindsay Lohan’s Got Big Lesbian Tits and No Bra of the Day

10 Comments »

Part of the reason I don’t believe that Lohan is a full blown Lesbian is because of her tits. The only lesbians I have met with a hot set of tits have never really been lesbian, but more the kind of girl who charges you 20 dollars a song to let you watch her lick a pussy during a lesbian show in the VIP room of the stripclub. Real Lesbians with big tits usually have the stomach, ass and legs to match and have turned to lesbianism as a last resort for finding love and affection by someone who they aren’t necessarily as superficial as a guy is and who can connect to them on an emotional level and not only on a physical level because physically, they are disgusting.

Sure Lohan’s got a whole fuckin’ suitcase of issues, from daddy issues after being born into a family with a cheating, alocholic father and commitment issues that stem from FES from That 70’s Show who broke her teenage heart when he was just lookin’ for a good time, to self worth issues that stem from having been thrown into the industry as some kind of tool to make other people money with some whore of a mother leading her to drugs and drinking and multiple sex partners only to decide that the only way to change her image and her lifestyle is to date girls or some shit. I mean, I’m not a therapist but most of the gay dudes I know come from abusive childhoods or are products of being bullied and gay is like the club for all these rejects. I will bet money that only a small percentage of people are actually genetically attracted to the same gender and the rest are just lookin’ for acceptance and a life of fabulousness.

Either way, she’s not wearing a bra and last night, while out, I was somehow managed to hang out with a group of 18 year olds while they were getting ready to go out to a club. One of them didn’t want to wear her bra and decided that she needed to tape her tits to get the support she needed and for some reason she felt the need to do it in front of me. After about a minute of seeing her strapping her teenage breasts down like they were a box and she was a mover, I chimed in a told her she was doing it all wrong, so she asked me to do it for her, so there I am in the middle of the street with a topless 18 year old and a roll of tape trying to find the best way to simulate the effect of a bra and I felt like I won the fuckin’ lottery. I mean I didn’t get turned on by the shit, but I was thinking that maybe my life isn’t that bad and that I should start putting ads on Craigslist soliciting my new found talent of makin’ bras our of household object.

Either way, here’s Lohan’s tits, a set I wouldn’t mind being asked to tape up, which isn’t saying much because I would pretty much tape any tits that are asking to be taped and I am tempted to take this new found talent to the street kids who can’t afford bras but that’s just because I like helping those less fortunate have cleavage.

Posted in:Lesbian|Lindsay Lohan|Tits

2008

14

Aug

I Comment on Lohan’s Comments About Her Sister’s Breast Implants of the Day

16 Comments »

So Lindsay Lohan made a statement on her myspace about her sister having fake tits and I unfortunately agree with a couple things she said, like that a 14 year old getting implants is insane and even the most opportunist mother wouldn’t allow for that, it’s just an insane accusation and shouldn’t have been taken seriously, I also thing caring about a 14 year old’s tits is a little fucking pedophilic, but maybe that girl shouldn’t wear retarded push-up bras showing off her perky little teenage tits, even she didn’t want people lookin’ or commenting on the shit.

What I don’t agree with is when bitch says that it is disconcerting that people focus on the negative of people’s lives, that we are so bored with our own lives that we need to focus on their life and manifest lies about them, well last time I checked, Lohan was a child star, making more money than she knew what to do with, who was going through some kind of mental breakdown and identity crisis, filling her emptiness with cock and drugs, before deciding she was a fuckin’ lesbian and finding stability with a girl 10 years older than her who can provide the maternal support she never had, and who can’t break her down emotionally like the penis she got herself caught up with in the past.

Her life involved doing nothing but lying on screen, playing people who don’t exist in scenarios that don’t exist all while self-medicating because she was bored, empty, lost and could financially, It was some kind of cry for attention of a spoiled rich kid that was manifesting negativity on herself all because she’s a self-absorbed little cunt who doesn’t realize there’s a world out there other than her own and that she is the center of the fuckin’ universe, so when people come along and talk about her, or other people she knows, she automatically assumes we’re bored with our lives.

The truth is that we’re doin’ ok, even if we’re poor, we still have more stable, wholesome, balanced lives and we just turn to celebrities for a fuckin’ laugh because they are fuckin’ comedy in their delusional ways. They make too much money, are thrown in our fuckin faces over and over again, and are easier targets than people in our immediate circle.

Bitch is a product of the media and not a real fuckin’ person, sure she may have feelings, but fuck them, she sold them when she sold her soul to the devil for a hefty paycheck and should stop her fuckin’ complaining and get some perspective that we don’t actually care about her or any celebs, we don’t want to be her or other celebs, we just want to see you fuckin’ fail and laugh at you along the way, because it’s funny to watch and the truth is you can be easily replaced and we can all forget about you, just as soon as you stop workin and move to some organic ranch to live off your money and to herd shee like the lesbian you’re pretending to be…..

Here’s her joke of a statement that she made….. the only thing interesting about it is that she figured out how to use a computer….

hey everyone..
i just had to share something that came up today and it made me feel a bit sick to my stomach.
so, here’s the visual…
me and my friend Patrick walking into a store, and two paparazzi come up out of nowhere (like usual) and start throwing questions at me…
one of them being, “Hey Lindsay, what do you have to say about people commenting on your sisters implants?”
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my response simply was, “Did you really just ask me that? She is a 14 year old girl, and you are a pedophile!”
i was caught out of nowhere so i didn’t really come up with the proper response at the time.. there’s many other things that i felt like saying, but why give it to a random guy with a camera so that he can make money!
All i am trying to say is, is that, i was raised with a wonderful family surrounding me, of course we have our ups and downs, but all in all my mother taught us to appreciate what we have been given. Nor would she ever encourage, or allow a 14 year old child to alter her body.
i am not judging people that do, but i am just saying that its not something that my family finds necessary to do, especially when you’re not even fully developed yet!
It is hard enough being 14 years old and you have enough insecurities to begin with, then add being in the public eye…
i just find it really disconcerting that people have to focus on the negative and that some people are sooooo bored with their own lives that they need to manifest lies to hurt another person.
in a more positive light…
i got some great clothes from alexander wang and i miss samantha cuz she’s out of town 🙁
have a wonderful day everyone~
til next time..
xx LL

I’m glad she got some great clothes, maybe that empty purchasing will bring some pleasure in her useless fuckin’ life where she does nothing for the greater good of the world, I am sure that 5,000 dollars she spent on a dress wouldn’t have been appreciated by a family of 6 struggling to put food on the table because they don’t even make 1500 dollars a fuckin’ month between them, you irrelevant, greedy, selfish, irrelevant piece of garbage of a whore.

Posted in:Breast Implants|Lindsay Lohan

2008

08

Aug

Lindsay Lohan See Through of the Day

19 Comments »

I met a real live lesbian yesterday and I lived to tell about it. I partially blame her for making me sick, not because I made out with her or really spent all that much time with her, but because lesbian’s must be dirty from eating all that pussy….and somehow manageed to curse me with her lesbian finger by touching the glass I was drinking out of, in a discreet lesbian way to kill off all penis.

Either way, she was wearing fitness gear because like a good lesbian she was comin’ from the gym where she works as a trainer and where she tries to jack up her testosterone count through weightlifting as well as jack off to all the women she watches change in the locker room and even hi-jack all potential sexually confused pussy to their dark lesbian side, ruining the chances of one day finding her picture on the internet because of an angry exboyfriend and that’s just part of the reason lesbians are the devil.

So I asked this fitness lesbian how many push-ups she could do, she dropped to the floor and did 40 or 50 or ever 100, I really couldn’t tell you, because she was in spandex pants and all i was doing was watching her pants crawl up her lesbian cunt and see the fcking thing quiver like it was being fisted by some other chick and as she struggled with the exercise I stared more and more untile she caught me and called me a fuckin’ pervert….and I tried to convince her that the one thing we have in common is that we both love pussy so if anything she should understand where I am coming from, instead so just said she loves women and that I am the reason for that. I felt good, like I had some real purpose in life.

EIther way, here’s Lohan in a see through shirt, it’s her gift to Sam Ronson on her 31st Lesbian Birthday, unfortunately, the shirt isn’t even that see through to me, but to every other site it is, so I guess I gotta go along with the shit because otherwise I won’t be able to maintain the title of the most credible see through source on the internet, a title that I gave myself.

PS – I have a fever so if what I write makes no sense, it’s cuz I am dying, ya fuckin’ Pervert.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|See Through

2008

07

Aug

Lindsay Lohan and Her Lesbian Boots of the Day

16 Comments »

Lohan is taking this whole lesbian thing pretty fucking seriously. It won’t be long before she shaves her head and leaves her bangs, gains 80 pounds, wears flannel and rips off dicks for a full time job. I guess the actor in her makes living this lie a lot easier for her because she gets into fuckin’ wardrobe, gets gay married and jumps through the lesbian hoops only a molested fat girl could really understand like it was a fucking movie role.

I am not saying that she’s not bumping vagina with Ronson, I am not saying that they aren’t in love and I am not saying she’s denounced cock because she’s had enough of it to last a normal girls lifetime numerous times over and every single one of those cocks has turned its back on her because no one respects anyone that easy and no one sticks around after they get what they want after the first hour of knowing a person. I am also not saying that FEZ from that 70s show didn’t fuck up her idea of relationships because he was older than her and tricked her into banging him and made her want to marry him before leaving him or that she has trust issues stemming from her cheating drunk father. But I am saying that this lesbian shit is just working for her now, because she’s an unstable, boring, sensitive piece of shit with no sense of humor and this is won’t last forever. It’s just a phase and I’ve seen in time and time again with broken hearted, addict girls who work at the strip club.

In all honesty, I like Sam Ronson a lot. I think she’s fuckin’ cool, down to earth and even kinda talented, but she is in over her head with this Lohan trash. Having to deal with this broken down cunt that we’d all probably like to help breakdown a littel more than it already is, is probably a lot to deal with and no pussy is worth that kind of energy.

Either way, here’s indentity confused Lohan rockin’ her lesbian boots to help both her and the public believe her childish, useless sexuality lie.

Posted in:Boots|Lesbian|Lindsay Lohan

2008

23

Jul

Lindsay Lohan’s Lesbian Pants of the Day

5 Comments »

The nice thing about this Lohan lesbianism is that she’s brought a new face to the movement. Sure I always knew that hot chicks liked to get down with other girls, but the media and all the lesbian clubs I try to sneak in by pretending I am a woman on hormone therapy always throws these dyke images in my head. I figure it’s the lesbian way to keep dudes as far away from them as possible, since they hate penis, and figure if they put shaved head, fat chicks in wifebeaters and overalls with a pair of construction boots and flannel shirt tied around their waists on a motorcycle, we’ll be turned off and they are fucking right.

With people like Lohan and her amazing tits adding much needed new imagery to a tired sexuality choice of ugly girls who can’t get cock and the only hope for happiness is with other ugly chicks guys don’t want so that they aren’t lonely, lesbianism and lesbian clubs may take a whole new turn. I predict lots of copycat lesbians hit, kinda like how cociane got big with young hot girls cuz celebs were doing it, only with more pussy licking.

All that hard lesbian work the hard lesbian motorbikers have been doing is going down their lesbian toilet where their tampons should be going, only the testosterone shots took that shit away from them too.

Posted in:Lesbian Pants|Lindsay Lohan

2008

17

Jul

Sam Ronson Blows Lohan a Kiss of the Day

7 Comments »

I like Sam Ronson. I don’t know if she’s a good DJ, but I do know she’s good at marketing herself, since Celebrity DJs who want to get paid, need a Celebrity relationship and if they really want to get noticed, it’s better to make that Celebrity Relationship as scadelous as possible with one of the most popular girls in the gossip magazines.

She went from being the rich kid sister of some music producer that only some people have heard of, to being this IT girl everyone is talking about. That’s not to say they aren’t in love, or that they don’t bump pussies, but it is to say that in order to get to that high profile relationship, she’s gotta eat a lot of shit. I am not talking about licking Lohan’s asshole, I am talking about level she has to deal with a totally unstable, drug addicted 20 year old, who doesn’t know right from left, who has been rumored to be seen talking to herself in clubs while high, and who comes from a crazy family with a spoiled cunt upbringing where she always gets what she wants, leading me to believe she’s a demanding little whore.

So here’s Sam Ronosn, trying to make a name for herself and trying to enjoy this high quality celebrity pussy, despite the herpes ourbreaks and she’s probably trapped trying to balance it all out so that she doesn’t go insane. I remember a time when I was working security at a psyh ward of a hospital and trying to control this nut cases, or convers with these nut cases put a strain on me, but I did get some of the best blowjobs in my life, but that could only be because I’d finish as fast as possible so that the crazy slut wouldn’t relapse into her memories of her countless molestations of the past and bite my dick off.

So everyone shits on her for dressing like a dude, or looking like a dude, when I don’t find anything about her all that offensive, I don’t think she looks like a man, she’s just skinny. I don’t think her style is that different than hipster chicks I see out, and the truth is I have the same watch as her. Sure I got mine in Chinatown for about 4 dollars and it doesn’t work, but it still means we have the same taste.

Either way, here are pictures of her blowing a kiss to Lohan because if she doesn’t it may upset Lohan and throw her off into some kind of bipolar rage where she fucks the cast and crew of her movie, doesn’t sleep for three days and masters the art of crying and laughing hysterically at the same time.

So enjoy these pics of Ronson walking on glass, because I am sure she’s not enjoying living this mess she’s got herself caught up inside, despite all the money she’s found herself making and the name she’s managed to put on the map.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Sam Ronson