2009
30
Mar
Anna Kournikova did some ads for K-Swiss. I didn’t realize K-Swiss was still around. I haven’t seen that shit since the gangsters in my neighborhood stocked up on them back in the late 90s because they were on sale. Does anything more really need to be said about this? I don’t think so.
Posted in:Anna Kournikova|K-Swiss|Photoshoot
2009
17
Mar
Kate Moss is still getting work even though she’s old and a drug addict. Here she is doing a photoshoot as the face of Yves Saint Laurent. I like that despite being a cokehead she can still get hired, you know because I guess everyone’s a fucking cokehead in the fashion world so if routine drug tests were implemented, they’d have no one to work, which is unfair, because when I was applying for work as a flight attendent to escape this hell I am living, they asked me to leave the casting call, because I did a bump in front of a recruiter in the bathroom and they didn’t think me telling them that it gives me a little more edge, confidence and alertness to get the job well done was a good enough reason….in fact I think they even called the cops.
I guess like anything we have to wonder what example this will give girls, you know since any girl aware of who the face of Yves Saint Laurent is, usually is a brat with a ton of fucking money who started getting high at 14 cuz daddy was at work and her allowance was 1000 dollars a day….It doesn’t matter – just look at her nipple, live her nipple and love her nipple.
Posted in:Kate Moss|Nipple|Photoshoot
2009
24
Feb
Christina Milian King Magazine photoshoot
I have loved Christina Milian since seeing her get covered in mud like a dirty little whorein her one hit wonder album a few years back that I assume she’s trying to recreate. I assume she’s been dropped by her original label and that is why she’s been laying low but after deciding to go with myspace records, she’s recorded an album and now she’s doing her promotional rounds.
She ended up on the cover of King Magazine because I guess she’s black or appeals to black people and by black people I mean white suburban kids who buy magazines they think are for black people so they can act more black and garner some street cred, while real black people are too busy being gangsters, rappers or reading Fortune to bother picking shit up.
On a side note, I fell in love with a black girl last night, it was at the movies, she was tall and luxurious, I tried making eye contact, until her hoodrat boyfriend came and I felt it was better to not get shot.
Here is Milian doing her King Magazine thing…
Here’s her music Video I’ve Posted Before….
Us Against The World – Official Music Video
Posted in:Christina Milian|King|Photoshoot
2009
18
Feb
Here’s a video of Aubrey O’Day shooting her Playboy cover shoot because I figure since she’s obsessively talking about the shit like a 35 year old who finally lost his virginity to an actual girl talks to his friends on Second Life. Sure, it’s enough already but people find her hot and I like the fact that she’s an insecure girl who aspired to be in Playboy but always felt inadequate so that’s why she’s so proud of this accomplishment that I can’t see being a fucking accomplishment but maybe that’s because I am not a whore of a girl, and need the bunny tattoo on my pelvis to really grasp how big of a deal this is.
Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Photoshoot|Playboy
2009
30
Jan
Here are some pictures of Ali Lohan doing a photoshoot. I am not going to lie, I am a little torn because of these, sure I deem them totally inappropriate, as her dress is sheer and her titties are busting out, because getting off to pictures of 15 year olds in pictures is a crime and sexualizing a 15 year old should be a crime, but no one can control your dirty thoughts, so you should probably just keep it to yourself and not tell the world the things you’ve done to yourself thinking about hot summer days spent at the Dairy Queen or the public pool.
The reason I am torn is because it is perfectly legal to bang 14 year olds in Canada, so if let’s say Little Lohan looked 15 and not 40 and was hot and not a haggard, busted up and broken down faced monster, and these pictures turned me on I could go find my own Local Little Lohan, put her in this little outfit, have her dance around the room a little, before teaching me what she learned watching Gossip Girl, but the second I bust out a camera, I get arrested and that doesn’t seem fair, it’s like make it all legal, or make it all illegal, but not being able to document you sexual conquests should is the fucking crime here.
Point being, I am not down with 15 year olds, they just aren’t experienced enough to bring the slutty, and if they are slutty, it’s all an act. I figure let the teenage boys premature ejaculate for them and I’ll take em over at 18. Unfortunately, that never happens, but I can pretend it does, this is the internet.
Dina Lohan doesn’t think the same way as me. She wants people jerking off to her daughter, because she knows sex sells. I mean her vagina is the only reason she’s ever accomplished anything in her life, from free coke to her daughters’ careers, and that should be fucking criminal, because I remember when I tried to sell my stepdaughter to the neighbor when she was 16, my wife threatened to get me put the fuck away, but the second you get off the street and on the screen, shit’s totally accepted. Injustice.
Point being, Dina Lohan needs to rethink her parenting strategies, not that she’s a parent in anyway or has ever been one. She’s always been someone using her kids to give her the glamor she’s never been able to get for herself, no matter how many blowjobs she gave, it was just failed dreams.
So in her jealous rage towards Miley’s success, while thinking her Ali deserves that fame, and because Miley got all that press for her whore pictures, she goes ahead and coordinates this photoshoot, hoping for results. Unfortunately, Ali Lohan will never be a Miley, because her sister ruined all chances of her doing anything in life that isn’t porn and this is just a preview of what’s to come.
By the looks of these pictures, she’ll be alright going down that porn route and I mean she’s already got a head start on other future pornstars, since her mom’s been prostituting her all her life. Sure other pornstars-to-be may have the advantage since they are at home being molested/ raped / trained in their trailers by their dads, but Ali Lohan’s already comfortable in front of a camera….and that will probably go a long way. I also hear she’s a triple threat, but haven’t quite figured out what that means….
Here are those pictures….
Posted in:Ali Lohan|Photoshoot|Porn
2009
26
Jan
The next time Miley goes horseback riding, she should do it bareback, you know without pants or underwear, because it’s the best way to leave her box bruised, chaffed and smelling like shit, I mean other than spending the afternoon in a meeting with a team of Disney execs who own that teenage snatch. I mean it’s not prositution when it’s a career more, or maybe it is. Well at least she gets paid well, I mean otherwise it’d just be fucking sick since she is only 16, and I am not trying to present her as a sexual object, that would be illegal and suicide for me, I’ll just let Disney continue to do that, but in her defense, 16 year old’s are usually past the handjob phase, and have thrown the panty-on rule out the window, and taking things to the next level, so in her defense she’s gotta get some fuckin’ love somewhere, it’s not like that guy she’s dating is giving it to her, because he’s gay and scared of vagina, no matter how many promises it makes to give him a career.
Here she is doing a photoshoot somewhere….
Posted in:Horseback Riding|Miley Cyrus|Photoshoot
2009
16
Jan
Who the fuck is Anna Faris, oh right, she did a movie that would have been straight to DVD if the US population had any level of intelligence, but instead eat this kind of shit up like it was Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2 – The Search For My Castrated Testicles in Paris Hilton’s Panty Drawer . She was seen doing some kind of photoshoot on the street in some Freddy Kruger dress I find disgusting, because it reminds me of a tampon that just gave your girlfriend Toxic Shock Syndrome because it was kept in too long, but I guess it’s appropriate considering she’s rockin’ some serious period bloat. I love being a fat guy who can spend his day hating on girls who would never fuck me, it’s like some kind of restitution that brings me peace. Thanks Anna Faris for being the kind of girl who would never fuck me, you don’t realize how therapeutic your superficiality is.
Posted in:Anna Faris|Photoshoot
2008
15
Dec
Hilary Duff did Maxim and who really gives a shit. I am just surprised that Maxim is still around and that people buy that shit, not only because magazines are pretty fucking obsolete and kill trees, you fucking hippies, but because shit’s more repetitive than me, it’s like every issue is a repeat of the last issue and despite finding comfort in things we know and trust, it’s still boring and a waste of fucking time. Sure, I pull that shit out in magazine stands, just to see if maybe they’ve updated their format, or to see if they’ve finally bit the bullet and gone porn, but they just always let me the fuck down, including these pictures of Hilary Duff, would it be too much to ask to see a photoshoot with a skate to her neck and a hockey sick in her ass, while her boyfriend and the rest of his team suck each other off like they do in the locker room after they won a big fucking game, because it’s not gay to suck off your teammate if a teen starlet is in the corner fucking the equipment, like she does it in the bedroom at home? Step it the fuck up Maxim.
Posted in:Hilary Duff|Maxim|Photoshoot|Uncategorized
2008
09
Dec
Miranda Kerr did some photoshoot for some fashion magazine from France that I am sure none of you have a yearly subscription to, so I figured I’d post some of the pictures from her spread, because as you all know, the French are sluts and have anal sex on the first date and that kind of passion comes through in the photography, only they trick the models into thinking they are part of this greater artistic vision, which is along the same lines of what I had to do the time I convinced a French slut to have anal on the first date, if you consider throwing 50 dollars her way art…..
Posted in:Miranda Kerr|Photoshoot
2008
03
Dec
Katy Perry is a victim of positive reinforcement. Someone forgot to tell her that she fucking sucks and instead was surrounded by people who suck her big fucking dick all day long, making her think what she’s doing is relevant because of the paychecks, radio play, and crowds aplauding for you, without realizing the people who are paying to see her are just fucking idiots who eat up anything the radio feeds them.
So she can’t sing, she can’t dance and to make shit worse, she’s not even good looking or worth a fuck. She’s just a fat chick who isn’t fat right now, and her novelty act needs to fucking die, because if it doesn’t I probably will. I am easily affected by things, especially when I can’t escape them everywhere I fucking go.
Here’s a video of her doing the Beyonce dance, because she’s an annoying cunt, and a photoshoot where she looks hideous, because even with make-up, photoshop and good lighting, she can’t escape her fate…….
Posted in:Beyonce|Katy Perry|Photoshoot