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Archive for the Ugly Category

2009

05

Feb

Lady Gaga’s Gold Pants Don’t Make That Pussy a Gold Mine of the Day

I love this girl’s song pokerface, but I think it needs a little re-write, you know since it’s coming from her, maybe lyrics like “Mangled Face”, “Hit by a drunk driver and dragged 10 blocks face”, “Botched Plastic Surgery Face” or maybe “I’ve found my nose, but where did my chin go face”. All this to say, she’s ugly and I don’t actually love her Pokerface song, shit is just always on the fucking radio that I know every lyric and can’t help but sing a long and that makes me hate myself more that I already do. I know I didn’t think it was possible, but I guess I can thank Lady Gaga for that.

Bonus that’s Not Really a Bonus, Here are some pictures of her in another obnoxiously stupid and fabricated weird enough to get attention outfit….

Posted in:Lady Gaga|Ugly

2009

29

Jan

Lady Gaga is So Fucking Ugly She Can’t Be Human of the Day

I guess we shouldn’t hate Lady Gaga, considering the reason Lady Gaga wears sunglasses is because she’s heinous (H’anus) and she knows it.

She’s on this cover this dodgy mutant weird lookin’face as much as she fucking can because she knows that only serious horny perverts and horror movie make-up artists can really get inspired by it. Even her parents try to convince her to cover her mug up, and give each other high fives when she turns down attending family functions, because it makes the people around them judge them, wondering what the hell they did wrong, and they rather keep things out of sight and out of mind.

So I don’t hate the fact that she looks like she’s trying to be glamorous in these pics, even though I normally really hate chicks in sunglasses at night or inside, with some obnoxious front, because I approve that this time the bitch is doing it because it’s saving us from having to look at her disgusting face in its entirety, next time around she should try a ski mask…or maybe she should try to stay home, or even suicide, I think it’ll be a good look for her…one I could really get used to.

The only fame she really ever deserved was winning first prize as pig of the year at the county fair, or maybe as a prize winner at some genetic disorder clinic’s nation wide search for stories that inspire for beating all odds by living a normal life without letting her face disability get in the way. Or even getting some press on afternoon talk shows for being a product of incest, or as someone in a news segment who lived next to a toxic waste dumpsite for a couple of decades, drinking and showering in the radioactive water never really getting why parts of her body were falling off, or even as the spokesperson for safety in the workplace after surviving a mutilating farm equipment accident that we’d all get to see on some commercials. She does not deserve what she’s got and I hope it ends.

Posted in:Lady Gaga|Ugly

2008

12

Dec

Courtenay Semel Picture of the Day

I don’t think Courtnenay Semal should be thanking her Yahoo exec very rich father for sending her some money, I mean it is the least he could do after his genetics played a part in producing this Picasso Masterpiece of a face. Not only is her chin so weak it looks like she’s swallowing her face, but she’s also looks like she can’t close her mouth, something I call perma mouth and overall looks like a fucking monster. I don’t really understand how or why Tila Tequila and Lindsay Lohan have sucked her pussy, I guess because no guy ever would, and bi-sexual/lesbian girls are more sensitive to ugly chicks because all girls feel like they look like this hag on the inside, it’s all part of having a vagina, you know that whole low self-esteem shit, making the Lesbian world a much friendlier place for her. She should however consider suing her father for a lot of money for bringing her into this cruel world, causing emotional and psychological abuse caused by having a face like hers and that concludes Courtenay Semel’s picture of the day.

Bonus some Halloween action….to chime in the Christmas Season….

Bonus that is Definitely Not a Bonus….Her Wonky Fuckin’ Tit….to Match Her Wonky Fuckin’ Face.

Posted in:Courtenay Semel|Ugly

2008

21

Nov

Sarah Silverman is Fucking Ugly of the Day

Thank god they are funny, or that people think they are funny, because I don’t find them funny, but they are fucking ugly….maybe half of the laughs they get are from people awkwardly trying to process the mess that they are lookin’ at. You know, like the time I went to the hospital to visit a friend of mine who had been in a car accident and everytime people I knew warned me how offensive the sight was, I’d go into hysterics, or even like the time I couldn’t stop laughing when a friend of mine confessed to be about being raped violently by a masked man, leaving me feeling awakward knowing that I was the guy who raped her, hey, she was wearing a short skirt and totally was into it when it happened, don’t judge, I did the noble thing andconfessed to her a couple years later and she took it pretty well considering, you know she didn’t press charges or anything….but I haven’t been getting her annual Christmas cards or birthday phone calls, so she could be a little upset about it…..

I don’t know what I am saying, I am so fucking confused and distracted by the way these two look….

Bonus – That’s Not Really a Bonus – Because More Pics of this Cunt is More Like a Punishment – But Luckily So Is Everything On the Site – So I’m Sticking With Bonus – More Pics of Her….

Posted in:Sarah Silverman|Ugly

2008

06

Nov

Willis Sister Exclusive of the Day

I think the Willis family are pretty fucking rancid girls. I am talking wrongfully labeled People’s Most Beautiful because their mom paid off the magazine to put them on the list and was trying to cover-up the lies that she’s been feeding them their entire life when they come to her crying that a boy turned them down because they look like monsters.

Now every time Rumer comes crying on her mother’s doorstep, interrupting Ashton Kutcher’s MILF Fantasy where Demi teaches him how to tie his shoe while fucking his face, she can bust out the magazine and say “what do guys know, People Magazine said your beautiful”, tricking her into believing it and shutting her the fuck up so Rumer can goes back to her life with her delusion, far from Demi, because every time Demi looks at Rumer, she has to be reminded of how she wronged the world and how God wronged her, so it’s better to keep shit out of sight, for pretty much all of us,

Sometimes delusion is better than the truth since the truth in this case would lead any normal person to jump off a fucking bridge to say goodbye to this cruel world and leave their broken up face in a ravine/river where it belongs….

I don’t know what the fuck Demi Moore did wrong in a past life, or what the silicone implants and botched plastic surgery/ drug use did to her uterus but I think it’s just bad genes, because when she was younger she was a fuckin’ disgusting troll of a woman too, but she was smart enough to invest in herself and trick the world into thinking she was worth fucking, and by world I mean Ashton Kutcher, her tool to make her feel young.

Either way, I got this email about the Willis sisters and since I am lazy today, I figured I’d put it out there, because I hate them, and apparently so do other people.

i wish rumer was doing something other than being ugly in these pics.  do what you wish with them. they might not end up being of any use to you.

rumer is a major cunt though. i met her and wanted to choke her all night. the way she treated the staff there was insane.  she barked orders at them like they were idiots. bitch doesn’t even know how to say thank you.

When you’re that ugly, you’re allowed to hate the world. Here are those pics.

Posted in:Rumer Willis|Scout Willis|Ugly

2008

10

Oct

Audrina Is Just Not Hot Enough To Be This Famous of the Day

Audrina makes or made 35,000 dollars per episode of The Hills she was on, she may even make more than that now and she doesn’t deserve it according to me. Most fake titty retarded girls I know, make 10 dollars a song and are lucky to walk out of the club with 1000 dollars a week, and they get naked for that, while Audrina just stands around lookin’ like a fucking idiot. I know saying she should strip is standard and nothing new, but I don’t even think she’s got what it takes to do that. She is that talentless, and the only skill she had was having a family member or friend with a hook up who gave her the fuckin’ handout. I don’t like that she’s even being talked about or doing something people are patting her on the fucking back for, or interviewing her, because she just offer us with absolutely nothing and if anything she is just someone to make us feel better about ourselves. I am sure her parents are proud because the only hope they had for her was to marry an old Jewish Doctor with no standards and a big ol’ nose, because they go for that kind of thing.

Speaking of Jewish doctors, I was at a bar last night and some dude was walking around with his stethoscope. It turned out he was a med student and it was his way of seducing girls, because doctors have a god complex and think we are all impressed that they are studying medicine. I thought that was some pretty weak game, but it fuckin’ worked, within 20 minutes of getting in the place, he was checking girls vitals and running gynecological exams in the bathroom, when I pulled him aside, to ask him if he was legit, he laughed and said that it was all a joke that was working out pretty fucking well.

Posted in:Audrina Patridge|Ugly

2008

08

Oct

Ashley Tisdale Ugly Watch of the Day

I don’t like that Ashley Tisdale is giving us the sex eyes because she isn’t hot, it is actually pretty fucking offensive. If she really wanted to turn us on, she would have never left the house, or maybe she would have pulled her hair in front of her face like she was Cousin It, or she’d rock a Richard Nixon mask while running around screaming that she’s not a crook naked, or something that could at least let us focus on her vagina for a couple of minuts and forget what it’s attached to.

It’s like the typical ugly chick who doesn’t know she’s ugly because she hangs with girls who are uglier than her and her entourage always tell her how good looking sh eis and ends up living in an imaginary fantasy world, where all the boys want her and not her friends and she develops the self confidence to not kill herself or just embrace the fact that she’s ugly and becoming a comedian, because that’s what ugly people in Hollywood are supposed to do. Playing this sex symbol to 13 year olds is just going to fuck up the system, making boys think this is hot, leading to ugly girls getting boyfriends when they are supposed to stay at home friday nights knitting with their moms a few years down the road or even worse….homosexuality.

On a side note, happy Yom Kippur to Ashley Tisdale and all the Jews out there. The man on the radio just let me know that you all have to fast. Good luck with that and remember it’s a small price to pay for legal, medical and entertainment careers that pay lots of money, so it’s worth the struggle, despite the whining I am sure all your Jew houses are going to hear tonight, you know whimpers about how hungry you are and how light headed you are and how you think you’re going to die if you don’t get a fucking bagel in you, so for that struggle, I’d like to dedicate this post to all of yous jews.

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Ugly

2008

03

Oct

Maggie Gyllenhaal is a Fucking Monster of the Day

How the fuck did Maggie Gyllenhaal ever make it into acting. She looks more like the weird girl who doesn’t shower and who ends up becoming a lonely librarian because books don’t judge her and books are always there for her when she needs them. She does not look like someone who could be the object of anyone’s desire in a movie, or in real life. She doesn’t look like a leading lady or like someone I’d even want to see on the fuckin’ screen and I guess it takes a whole lot of movie magic to make her someone the general public can stomach, like it took a whole lot of deep throat magic to get her where she is today, not because saying ugly girls suck dick to the top is a cliche, but because all girls suck dick to get to the top, the ugly ones just suck a little fucking harder…….

Posted in:Maggie Gyllenhaal|Monster|Ugly

2008

26

Sep

Ashley Tisdale Ugly Watch of the Day

So….she’s still ugly…but that vitiligo shit stain discoloration on her arm is fucking hot, but I just like girls with disorders because they are easier to boss around. Despite popular belief that I hate ugly girls, I actually always defend them by saying they all have at least one nice attribute, whether it is hot tits, or a hot ass, or that they are skinny, or have nice eyes, or a nice pussy, you just have to look a little past the package as a whole. Just the other day I saw an ugly girl on the bus reading a magazine minding her own business and I decided to let her know that despite being ugly, she had great teeth and great teeth can take you a long way. I was pretty offended when she told me to fuck myself, but I guess some ugly girls have an ugly personality to match, or maybe I offended her by letting her know I knew she was ugly, but I figured by leaving the house that day, she already accepted that. So despite Ashley Tisdale’s hot skin disorder, she’s still ugly and that concludes the Ashley Tisday Ugly Watch of the Day.

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Ugly

2008

23

Sep

Ashley Tisdale is Still Ugly of the Day

In case you were concerned, alarmed or still wondering…Ashley Tisdale is still ugly. So you can go on with your day, like Ashley Tisdale goes on with her day, rockin’ her weak chin that makes her look like she’s swallowing her face and her big deviated septum nose that I thought she got sorted out.

It reminds me of this rich girl I used to tease about having a weak chin a few years ago, she would call me fat and disgusting and I’d mock her by sucking my chin in saying letting her know that he dis would be a lot more hurtful if I didn’t know what you looked like and after 6 months of the back and forth, I was still fat and disgusting only a little bit closer to suicide and she went and got a chin implant. Last I heard she’s engaged, pregnant and the owner of a beautiful condo and her career is really taking off and I am still fat and disgusting and a little bit closer to suicide. Yes…It sucks to be me but it sucks harder to be Ashley Tisdale, because I wouldn’t give my chin up for all the money, fame and pussy in the world, it just means too much to me.

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Ugly