DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

10

Apr

Doutzen Kroes Rocks the One-Piece of the Day

Doutzen Kroes, ex Victoria’s Secret model, who was recently fired and mom of Two…who doesn’t need to worry about money…because she’s rich and with some DJ you know probably fucks college girls around the world…every chance he gets…not becuase he’s black, but because raves are mainstram and college girls love that shit….

She is probably going through some kind of crisis now that her contract wasn’t renewed…because she’s been calling the paparazzi, and now posting pics of her in one-pieces…like she’s some kind of bikini expert thanks to showing up on set sometimes…

I assume she was the last wave of Victoria’s Secret models who will make actual money, thanks to the internet and these insta hoes being inexpensive for their huge following…which is what these brands want…

So now she’s forced to figure shit out…and she’s doing it in one pieces…and that’s ok..because Milk filled tits are good…in one-pieces…

Posted in:Doutzen Kroes

2015

10

Apr

Selena Gomez Bikini Photoshoot of the Day

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These photoshoot pics of Selena Gomez in a bikini were posted to instagram recently, and I figured why not stare at a Selena Gomez photoshopped picture in a one-piece bathing suit, because it covers up her gunt, and more importantly. the broken dreams left smeared on her gut by beiber when he came all over her belly…assuming that she wasn’t fucking him up the ass with random objects leaving him cumming on the floor in the doggy style position…

That said, she’s a pudgy, bloated, lupus Disney star, with probably implants, because Mexcians often times have shit tits…and I think she’s great…raised well in the world of Disney where sucking “up” to the right executive…got her mom the house, car and life she wanted…

There’s something magical about youthful whores who learn it as kids, and grow up with it…it’s far better than the whores who figure it out in college or at the first job…

I feel like these are old…but jerking off to her never gets old…even when she does…don’t act like you weren’t in her fan club when she was 16 you freaks.

Posted in:Selena Gomez

2015

10

Apr

Bruce Jenner – The Inverview – of the Day

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This ABC Diane Sawyer Bruce Jenner interview trailer is pretty funny….I feel like it is all scripted into the Kardashian show, because it is that level of insane…in terms of willing to destroy yourself for ratings…even if all the trannies out there will argue that getting a sex change isn’t destroying yourself but rather finding your true self by chopping off your dick and balls…but when Kardashian’s are invovled…it is safe to assume that it’s for content and not a bi-product of steroids in his athlete youth…or maybe…it’s just commentary of how the mom Kardashian pretty much ripped his balls off of him..and he’s going literal like an art project…

All this to say…it reminds me of a scene from a shitty Ben Stiller movie…yet it’s the Kardashian real life…which isn’t real life at all..

That said, here’s Kylie for Coachella to make it a better kind of creepy….

Here’s Kylie’s Fake ass Falling in the Deset/ Beach…

A video posted by Kylizzle (@kyliejenner) on Apr 7, 2015 at 5:24pm PDT

Here’s Kendall’s Back…

Posted in:Bruce Jenner

2015

10

Apr

Shay Mitchell Does Cleavage of the Day

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Shay Mitchell is a hugely famous Canadian actress who went to boarding school with someone I know on Vancouver Island….that person told me that she was an entitled spoiled cunt back then, and I can assume that after being thrown into Hollywood and having it work out for her, she’s a substantially worse spoiled cunt now…it’s like rich kids don’t get grounded when they become famous and from being on some silly, very famous show…they just get fucking worse…

The good news is that all girls, famous or not, realize that you can never be too famous, not to mention you can never have too many dudes jerk off to you, so you might as well put that kind of content out there, of let’s say waking up in bed in India, where I guess she’s from…and flashing the city…in some slumdog millionaire, only she’s just a millionaire…obnoxiousness…

Here’s her cleavage….I like the emoji – it makes it less whorish in her mind…but more whorish to me…like OMG look at me…whore…

Posted in:Shay Mitchell

2015

10

Apr

Lindsay Lohan is an Instagram Fitness Model of the Day

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Lindsay Lohan, who we recently enough watched slowly die off …. both career, sex appeal, even tabloid interest..thanks to drugs, and booze and starvation…has taken her addiction to health and fitness and is turning herself into an instagram model..and it’s pretty fucking funny, because it seems like she’ practicing for a character in a movie, maybe the Sarah Stage biopic or something equally useles…but now she’s getting fitness tea sponsorships…what a fucking joke…a joke I love…and that the brand loves…because why not milk her insanity for their personal gain…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan

2015

10

Apr

Brooke by Sarah Fountain of the Day

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Her name is BROOKE NASH , she’s an australian model who has posted her email to her instagram, so that you can send her love letters…something that you’re used to, only this time they won’t be to prison inmates who are the only women who write you back since they have little going on….and they probably won’t get you arrested since you’re in another country…but they will still probably creep you out…

She’s in this bikini shoot for a photographer named SARAH FOUNTRAIN , not sure what the pics are for, I just know that they are awesome, but then again, they feature a babe in a bikini in an ideal setting…what’s not to fucking like…when your life is a miserable series of fat chick and grey thanks to that cloud of sad over your pathetic, failure head…….right?

via C-Heads

Posted in:Photos

2015

10

Apr

LeAnna Rimes Bikini Pose of the Day

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LeAnna Rimes took a pic of herself bent over in a bikini…and I felt it was appropriate based on her level of classy whore from the south who fell off the rails and took her money to make herself into some kind of bootleg stripper looking housewife homewrecker…

She reminds me of every stripper trying to seduce me ass up posed over the bar pretending to order a drink..only the instagram version..

You know the kind of girl who acts like she wants to get raped, and you figure you can’t rape the willing so it’s not rape, only for her to charge you with rape…the worst…

Posted in:LeAnna Rimes

2015

10

Apr

Betty White Nudes on Flashback Friday of the Day

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If you can’t cum to a 1943 Betty White naked…because fame whores existed in the 40s also…you’re not a real man…if it helps you can always just pretend she is your grandma and you’re looking through your grandpa’s old albums….or if you’re like me and you’ve seen every Golden Girls episode ever…you can just enjoy all that is rose…too bad you can’t see if she’s got an inny or an outty…bastards were too wholesome for spread eagled pics back then..

..

Posted in:Flashback Friday

2015

10

Apr

Two Hoes Fighting……and Other Videos of the Day

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Woman Takes Pee in the Middle of the Street

Reporter Gets Interrupted!

Walter Scott Making a Run from the Cops…Before he was Shot Dead

Shot Gun Suicide…

Kid Falls Out of the Car

Police Beating in LA

Prisoner VS 4 Prison Guards

Men VS Corpse

Buggy VS Bush

Russian Getting a Head Transplant…

Man Carries Donkey with his Teeth

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2015

10

Apr

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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The funniest thing about getting drunk alone is when you get caught having sex by mall security….with yourself…because there’s no one there with you to have sex with so you take proactive measures to get the job done..outside the Victoria’s Secret changing room…because they are all your girlfriends….thanks to the Internet bridging that gap from what is real and fake..

Stretch…

It’s Coachella weekend, let’s hope at least one celebrity has “heat stroke”…

Here are some morning links….

Britney Spears Does Music Videos
GO

Jared Leto as The Joker
GO

Jet Lag of the Day
GO

Stupid Criminal of the Day
GO

Hilary Clinton for President
GO

Mirror Selfies!
GO

Butt in Leggings of the Day
GO

Dude to Get a Head Transplant
GO

Keri Russell in a Bikini
GO

Elevator Suicide!
GO

People Fucking Love Chick-Fil-A
GO

Elsa Hosk Topless for Mirage
GO

Two Girls Lose it On The Slingshot
GO

Port-O-Potty of the Day for Coachella
GO

Facebook Tracking….Becasue they are Evil
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS