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2015

19

Mar

Drunk Jessica Simpson of the Day

Here’s a solid built, no longer fat, very muscular Jessica Simpson possibly drunk, possibly medicated, possibly just trying to communicate on an empty stomach, or maybe just on speed, diet pills…or whatever…

Highlight of this interview, from the perspective of a drunken pervert, is pretty much the entire creepy interview…as she struggles..

But when she says her kid’s dad is her boyfriend, it reminded me of a pre-homosexual Joe selling his kids of for his personal gain, in what was creepy before learning he liked cock…

I don’t know where her publicist was, or why they allowed this to happen, but I am glad they did…the only fail is that I’m trying to jerk off to her armpit fat, because it’s practically tit…

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2015

19

Mar

Selena Gomez Shows Demonstrates Rim Jobs of the Day

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I don’t know if this is a picutre of Selena GOmez showing us what her asshole looks like using her mouth, but I would assume the coloring is about the same…unless of course she bleaches it, which she probably does…since no one really wants a reddish brown asshole, especially not when getting fucked by super weird rich dudes with super weird requirements, because the richer they get…the more insane they get…

Or maybe she’s just showing you her love…or her first move in giving a rip job…it all stars with a peck before bum fucking with your tongue the way bieber likes it…because that’s what Usher showed him and he grew up on….

Or maybe…just maybe…I’m reading into this too much and taking it to a dark place…that isn’t really all that dark…because she bleaches her asshole…

Posted in:Selena Gomez

2015

19

Mar

Luma Grothe in Lingerie of the Day

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I like Luma Grothe, but only because her name sounds like Russell Simmons saying “Gross”….and adult lisps always make me laugh…

It’s like dude, you’re a billionaire, you fuck young hot models everyday, you’re a yoga master and can pretty do anything you want, except pronounce the letter S

You sound like a fucking 5 year old…get it together…

Not that I care about Russell Simmons, but I love adult lisps, and I just think Grothe is Gross in Adult Lisp speak…and Grothe models in lingerie..in GQ Russia, even though she is from Brazil,

The world…is a confusing place…but this model is amazing…

Posted in:Luma Grothe

2015

19

Mar

Rita Ora, Like Most Girls, Has Tits of the Day

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My Rita Ora Story is not a very interesting one…but I’ll write it out anyway, because what else am I supposed to do with this fucking bullshit blog I’ve been doing for the last 10 years, which happen to be the worst 10 years, of my life…

Anyway, I was at some bar drunk as fuck, I don’t even remember when or where it was…and some british twat was right next to me ordering a drink, or next to someone ordering a drink…and I turned to the dude I was with and say “Oh shit, we’re next to Kelly Osborne…she’s better in person, but still a dump truck of a woman”….then we went back to drinking…and forgot we saw Kelly Osborne..

The next day my friend called me up and said “Hey remember when we say Kelly Osborne last night, well it was Rita Ora”…to which I said “the Rihanna impersonator?”….

All this to say, she’s a bootleg artist from the UK, who looks like a better looking Kelly Osborne, but she’s got tits, tits I’ve apparently been in the same room as, but tits that didn’t approach me or ask to me sucked by me, so tits, I don’t actually care about…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Rita Ora

2015

19

Mar

Hayden Panettiere Messy Hair on the Plane of the Day

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Remember Hayden Panettiere.. I mean she died off before having the kid, with a dude who I think was really the only reason she was worth paying attention to…with his being 7 foot and Russian and her being 4 foot and a Hollywood daughter of a hooker…it just was some vagina circus tricks that made her other midget circus tricks insigificant…I mean how the fuck did that happen…

But the thing with Hayden Panettiere, is that she never really falls off, because her fans are the weirdo, comicon type of loyal nerd who are emotionally married to her and for that reason alone she will live on forever….

Her messy hair on the plane, is not all that sexy, but there’s a fetish in there somewhere…

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere

2015

19

Mar

Shailene Woodley for Elle Magazine of the Day

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I wonder if I am the only person who finds this Shailene Woodley very lesbian looking, and thus unattractive, because the only people who are into lesbian looking girls are closet fags and other lesbians…as any straight dude, would probably like his chick to look a little less like KD LANG in the 80s, a lot more like something that won’t fuck them up the ass…

Her face isn’t even pretty, she looks like some cross between Peter Pan and a weirdo teenage boy in the Drama club.

I am not vibing on this at all, even when she’s pantsless, which is saying a lot because I have jerked off to inanimate objects that looked like a pussy before…meaning there’s something off with this one, or with you, if you’re into this one….

People are talking about her a lot lately, there must be a movie coming out.

Posted in:Shailene Woodley

2015

19

Mar

Kate Upton Surf Video of the Day

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I didn’t know that Kate Upton could surf. I guess it would make sense, or be a good excuse for why she was always in a bikini, I mean before being too fat for a bikini, and too fat to work as a model, and too fat for even people who like fat girls to are about her, despite her fat sloppy tits, because fat girls and fat tits….kind of come together…like you and all your friends in your circle jerk…homo.

Posted in:Kate Upton

2015

19

Mar

Jessica Hart Picking her Scabby Ass of the Day

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Jessica Hart is a model, she was a famous a few years ago she did Victoria’s Secret and shit like that, but her smartest and most important move was dating Stavros, the Greek shipping billionaire, who you may remember as Paris Hilton’s ex boyfriend, who has rolled through thousands of hot girls, thanks to being a billioniare, one of those weirdo rich people who probably also fucks dudes, since it is challenging, leaving Jessica Hart, likely Herpes infected, but then again, any Australian who moved to LA, to model and date Billionaires, probably had that LA strain long before any Stavros got into the picture…but it’s nice to look at her ass and imagine it being scabby thanks to Paris Hilton’s designer strain…it just makes these pics all the more gutter and trashy…like all these people are…and by people I mean.. hot as fuck gold digging, opportunist Australians with a dream…

Because we’re all allowed to have dreams…even when they come with herpes if I need to…I just close my eyes and pretend they aren’t their…and that rough patch of skin is just from the winter air…

Here’s her ass flash..I am a fan…but you can just search her name on the site and see her naked…that’s the thing with models…they are all naked in pics…out there…

Posted in:Jessica Hart

2015

19

Mar

Toni Garrn for TUSH Magazine of the DAy

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The highlight of Toni Garrn’s career was when she was rumored to have had her asshole filled with Leonardo DiCaprio – but I am going to assume, based on her German roots, and Leonardo’s Homosexuality despite his attempts to cover it up, that the asshole that was filled was in fact Leonardo DiCaprio…it is called pegging and people dig it..and girls do it…especially if it promises great PR for your future modeling career…

That said, I dont’ think she’s still with Leonardo DiCaprio as his beard, Victoria’s Secret, who he clearly has equity in, has probably funnelled a lot more girls to him, but that doesn’t mean that Toni Garrn doesn’t matter, she’s tall and actually looks like a model, which is nice to see in this instagram generation of short useless girls getting famous, when all I want to stare at is something a little more long and traditional…

She’s in this TUSH magazine, showing some strategic nudity, unfortunately no nipples but who needs nipples when you can just google porno clips…or ask a girl on tinder to come over to sit on your face..

All this shit is obsolete, but she still looks good…my only issue with it is that to me a magazine called TUSH should be about spread assholes…or even just bare asses…I want more ass TUSH…stop your lies…they hurt me and are tearing our family apart…

Posted in:Toni Garrn

2015

19

Mar

Cara Delevingne Proves that Acting Requires No Talent of the Day

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Cara Delevingne puts on her American accent because she’s a Brit…for some new movie that I didn’t bother paying attention the the name of, because I don’t actually care, I just like being reminded that acting requires zero to no skill, despite what actors tell you, because if the world knew that playing make-belief was a fucking scam that pays really well, then it would lower their value, and thus lower their pay, so keeping it a closed circuit rather than an open market is the strategy from everyone involved..

The good news is that thanks to the internet, you don’t need the studios anymore, fuck em, go make your own movie and become the next Cameron Diaz, you don’t need to be Cara Delevinge, or to be an it girl…because anyone can do this bullshit…you just have to be a big enough asshole to do it….

Posted in:Cara Delevingne