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2015

11

Apr

Kendall Jenner, Bieber and Hailey Baldwin do Coachella of the Day

If you didn’t have a reason to go to Coachella this year, book your flight now, because Bieber is there and as you know, anywhere Bieber is, is the place to fucking be…because he’s not a cheesy, popstar or anything….he is the embodiment of all things cool..and I guess these young, rich, celebrity, it-girls in bikini tops are too…

I guess what it comes down to is that as a 45 year old man….why the fuck am I posting this? Seriously..I should be filing my taxes or going to my kid’s high school graduation or fasting for my colonscopy….or some shit that other 45 year olds who have never heard of any of these idiots because they don’t pollute their lives with pop culture nonsense and focus on what is important….cheating on their wives and paying the mortgage….

Either way, here are the pics…

Posted in:Kendall Jenner

2015

11

Apr

Kate Upton Photoshoot for Vogue of the Day

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Kate Upton is in Vogue because she’s a fashion model, or maybe because she’s a viral sensation, who had big boobs that went viral, back when she was young and the rest of her hadn’t caught up to them tits, only to have maximized that window of opportunity, now that the rest of her has caught up to her tits…

I guess the good news, is that thanks to modern technology, there is photoshop…

Here are the pics…for Vogue…by Testino…she looks hot…

Here is the video…where you can see how fat she actually is…

Posted in:Kate Upton

2015

11

Apr

Kylie Jenner’s Nice Shirt of the Day

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Kyle Jenner is at Coachella…apparently with her older, black boyfriend, and as it turns out…she’s wearing a pretty appropriate bikini top that I can assume her mother styled for her, because, well….she’s a Kardashian and that in and of itself comes default with a “LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME”….billboard across her nipples…thanks for that…

Posted in:Kylie Jenner

2015

11

Apr

Lucy Hale for National Sibling Day of the Day

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A video posted by Lucy Hale (@lucyhale) on Apr 10, 2015 at 8:57pm PDT

I don’t really follow Pretty Little Liar Lucy Hale’s career…I just know that she’s pretty famous because of her very popular show….

But I do support her National Siblings Day handstand…so that the world can see her ass as it works against gravity…or more importantly…as she slaps her sister’s ass for Natonal Siblings Day, whoich for someone with a fetish is a good enough thing….no matter who you are, what you do for a living, or whether you’re famous or not…so slap that sister ass…

Posted in:Lucy Hale

2015

10

Apr

Doutzen Kroes Rocks the One-Piece of the Day

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Doutzen Kroes, ex Victoria’s Secret model, who was recently fired and mom of Two…who doesn’t need to worry about money…because she’s rich and with some DJ you know probably fucks college girls around the world…every chance he gets…not becuase he’s black, but because raves are mainstram and college girls love that shit….

She is probably going through some kind of crisis now that her contract wasn’t renewed…because she’s been calling the paparazzi, and now posting pics of her in one-pieces…like she’s some kind of bikini expert thanks to showing up on set sometimes…

I assume she was the last wave of Victoria’s Secret models who will make actual money, thanks to the internet and these insta hoes being inexpensive for their huge following…which is what these brands want…

So now she’s forced to figure shit out…and she’s doing it in one pieces…and that’s ok..because Milk filled tits are good…in one-pieces…

Posted in:Doutzen Kroes

2015

10

Apr

Selena Gomez Bikini Photoshoot of the Day

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These photoshoot pics of Selena Gomez in a bikini were posted to instagram recently, and I figured why not stare at a Selena Gomez photoshopped picture in a one-piece bathing suit, because it covers up her gunt, and more importantly. the broken dreams left smeared on her gut by beiber when he came all over her belly…assuming that she wasn’t fucking him up the ass with random objects leaving him cumming on the floor in the doggy style position…

That said, she’s a pudgy, bloated, lupus Disney star, with probably implants, because Mexcians often times have shit tits…and I think she’s great…raised well in the world of Disney where sucking “up” to the right executive…got her mom the house, car and life she wanted…

There’s something magical about youthful whores who learn it as kids, and grow up with it…it’s far better than the whores who figure it out in college or at the first job…

I feel like these are old…but jerking off to her never gets old…even when she does…don’t act like you weren’t in her fan club when she was 16 you freaks.

Posted in:Selena Gomez

2015

10

Apr

Bruce Jenner – The Inverview – of the Day

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This ABC Diane Sawyer Bruce Jenner interview trailer is pretty funny….I feel like it is all scripted into the Kardashian show, because it is that level of insane…in terms of willing to destroy yourself for ratings…even if all the trannies out there will argue that getting a sex change isn’t destroying yourself but rather finding your true self by chopping off your dick and balls…but when Kardashian’s are invovled…it is safe to assume that it’s for content and not a bi-product of steroids in his athlete youth…or maybe…it’s just commentary of how the mom Kardashian pretty much ripped his balls off of him..and he’s going literal like an art project…

All this to say…it reminds me of a scene from a shitty Ben Stiller movie…yet it’s the Kardashian real life…which isn’t real life at all..

That said, here’s Kylie for Coachella to make it a better kind of creepy….

Here’s Kylie’s Fake ass Falling in the Deset/ Beach…

A video posted by Kylizzle (@kyliejenner) on Apr 7, 2015 at 5:24pm PDT

Here’s Kendall’s Back…

Posted in:Bruce Jenner

2015

10

Apr

Shay Mitchell Does Cleavage of the Day

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Shay Mitchell is a hugely famous Canadian actress who went to boarding school with someone I know on Vancouver Island….that person told me that she was an entitled spoiled cunt back then, and I can assume that after being thrown into Hollywood and having it work out for her, she’s a substantially worse spoiled cunt now…it’s like rich kids don’t get grounded when they become famous and from being on some silly, very famous show…they just get fucking worse…

The good news is that all girls, famous or not, realize that you can never be too famous, not to mention you can never have too many dudes jerk off to you, so you might as well put that kind of content out there, of let’s say waking up in bed in India, where I guess she’s from…and flashing the city…in some slumdog millionaire, only she’s just a millionaire…obnoxiousness…

Here’s her cleavage….I like the emoji – it makes it less whorish in her mind…but more whorish to me…like OMG look at me…whore…

Posted in:Shay Mitchell

2015

10

Apr

Lindsay Lohan is an Instagram Fitness Model of the Day

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Lindsay Lohan, who we recently enough watched slowly die off …. both career, sex appeal, even tabloid interest..thanks to drugs, and booze and starvation…has taken her addiction to health and fitness and is turning herself into an instagram model..and it’s pretty fucking funny, because it seems like she’ practicing for a character in a movie, maybe the Sarah Stage biopic or something equally useles…but now she’s getting fitness tea sponsorships…what a fucking joke…a joke I love…and that the brand loves…because why not milk her insanity for their personal gain…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan

2015

10

Apr

Brooke by Sarah Fountain of the Day

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Her name is BROOKE NASH , she’s an australian model who has posted her email to her instagram, so that you can send her love letters…something that you’re used to, only this time they won’t be to prison inmates who are the only women who write you back since they have little going on….and they probably won’t get you arrested since you’re in another country…but they will still probably creep you out…

She’s in this bikini shoot for a photographer named SARAH FOUNTRAIN , not sure what the pics are for, I just know that they are awesome, but then again, they feature a babe in a bikini in an ideal setting…what’s not to fucking like…when your life is a miserable series of fat chick and grey thanks to that cloud of sad over your pathetic, failure head…….right?

via C-Heads

Posted in:Photos