DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

21

May

Alyssa Miller for Vogue Russia of the Day

Alyssa Miller isn’t all that hot of a model, she just played the system right, but I guess that logic can be applied to anyone who has success, who just master manipulated the right people to get what she wants, from dating the son of the founder of Sports Illustrated bikini photography…pretty fucking convenient use of a vagina…to ditching him for an A-List star like Jake Gyllenhaal…because that should open more doors after you’ve taken all you can from the one you previously opened…

I mean so many girls are just like this, and so many dudes buy into their lies, all thanks to tits…and a smiling sweetness that blinds them…

I guess the best strategy is to be hurt bag fat loser with nothing to offer women…that way you end up with the real quality fat chicks no one wants…

Seriously getting used is ok, when you’re using back…preferably for anal…

Posted in:Alyssa Miller

2014

21

May

Natasha Barnard for Freya Lingerie of the Day

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Natasha Barnard is a South African model, who before doing this very important shoot for Freya Lingerie, was in Sports Illustrated Swimsuit, because I guess Sports Illustrated likes South African girls, they use a handful of them in their nonsense…

Maybe they use a South African photographer, or maybe these models come at a discount, due to the risk associated with them having HIV according to their national HIV stats, a risk that I don’t consider a risk when they look like this, because I’ve had unprotected sex with way fucking worse that probably had a higher risk of HIV thanks to a life of living on the streets, needle sharing and prostituting…

Not that any SI models actually get paid, that’s why they all go onto score rich husbands…

Either way, here’s the lingerie…..boring catalog nonsense…

Posted in:Natasha Barnard

2014

21

May

Rosalind Lipsett’s Modelbombing Hollywood Boulevard of the Day

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Her name is Rosalind Lipsett…

She’s an Irish model with an amazing bikini body, but more importantly, she’s into having fun and joking around…..

You see, she doesn’t take herself or modelling as career too seriously, and instead likes to poke fun at it, like you want to poke fun at her, with your penis….

She’s coined the term Modelbombing….where a model, in full model form, and full model costume, goes out in public places and goes full on modelling…pretty funny stuff….

Posted in:Rosalind Lipsett

2014

21

May

Edita Vilkeviciute for Holiday Magazine of the

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Sometimes all it takes is a picture of a hot model like Edita Vilkeviciute enjoying her coffee at the kitchen table to remind you how much your life sucks…

YOu know taping into some 1960s, black and white, simpler time, image you expected for yourself…

You know, like it’s out of an old movie you saw back when you had hope and thought maybe your kitchen table would have a set of legs like this, the morning after you came inside her, early in your whirlwind romance…

But instead the only legs your kitchen table have are duct taped back on, because your fat wife puts her fatness into her eating and the table can’t support the shit…

I don’t know why, these Edita Vilkeviciute speak to my cold black heart…they make me believe in love, at least with someone who is a top model with legs like this…simulating a marriage you’d probably want to have since it’s better than what you have….

Posted in:Edita Vilkeviciute

2014

21

May

Rachel Bilson Pregnancy of the Day

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#490942591 / gettyimages.com

There was a time….when Rachel Bilson mattered. She was on The O.C. and it was a hugely popular show, that even I watched, because it helped me trick college girls into fucking me, because college girls are dumb as shit and will fuck with the right mix of tequila and connection on a show they love…

Then she faded out, and not in a good way, her husband kidnapped her and brought her to Canada where she lived locked up in a cage in the igloo as some kind of reclusive, because he had be type cast as a Star Wars character, and couldn’t let her near actors with actual careers ahead of them….

Now she’s pregnant and these are some pictures of her the other day, hiding her pregnancy, that I am sure some of you hope doesn’t happen, or at least happens with a c-section, because aborting the mission is far less abusive to a vagina…

Not that you’ll ever meet Bilson, but you’re stuck in 1999, back when your life seemed to be more hopeful, before it fucking sucked.

All this to say, who cares about Rachel Bilson or her uterus, there’s so many better girls to focus on who haven’t been written off from their role in hollywood so many years ago…even if she’s acting and on a show, she’s insignificant…

#490942307 / gettyimages.com

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#490782491 / gettyimages.com

Posted in:Rachel Bilson

2014

21

May

Vanessa Paradis Lookin’ Hot of the DAy

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Out with the old, in with the new.

In every divorce, or break up because you were never married, because you aren’t into convention, and because you always wanted bastard out of wedlock babies….comes a bitter ex who has fire under her ass and something to fucking prove, because her A-List husband left her for some harlot, barely famous, hooker on set…who everyone thinks is fucking hotter that the old…

This is why gyms exist, why plastic surgery exists, because if we didn’t live in a vain world filled with temptation, and hot new pussy who like A-list husbands…No one has morals or values…especially not me…but I am more into going after the broken down wife who can’t get over the rejection, because they put in more effort and have lower standards, and are really just easier.

Posted in:Vanessa Pardain

2014

21

May

Rumer WIllis Bikini Pic of the Day

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Rumer Willis posted this bikini pic, and turns out that this is her fucking angle. She should be a director of more than just her social media pics.

She’s figured out that if she wants to look pretty she just needs to tell the photographer to keep stepping farther and farther back….until her face blends into the rest of her, and all that can be seen is half nakedness, and no potato head or mutated features thanks to her mom, to get in the way of it…because if Demi and her billion dollar plastic surgery has taught her anything, it’s that you can fake it with a tight body…

All this to say…bitch is looking’ good right here, right now, but maybe I’m just desperate…

Posted in:Rumer Willis

2014

21

May

Tetyana Veryovkina in Lingerie of the Day

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Queen of Kings Lingerie…sounds classy enough to book some low level Russian who would have otherwise been a cam girl for the Russian mob to pose for it…but instead she’s doing lingerie…

I guess the tragedy in all this is that she could very easily taken her general soulless Russian willing to anything for the American dream body into porn, but I don’t even watch porn, so seeing her get railed or not is irrelevant…but knowing you could have bought her as a wife if the stars aligned differently, just makes this shit frustrating….now she’s got an ego and only goes for billionaires…that’s how they all work when they transition to “model”…from sex worker – even if it’s the same fucking bullshit…

Posted in:Tetyana Veryovkina

2014

21

May

Vanessa Hudgens Posts the Hottest Bikini Pic Ever of the Day

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It’s safe to say that this is the hottest Vanessa Hudgens has ever looked in a bikini, far hotter than when she was spilling out of her bikini in all the wrong ways during Spring Breakers…it’s like get that proper lighting and paddle out two fucking miles so that your iPhone only sees a silhouette of what is…because that is how she looks best….

Here she is in tight leggings Click Here

Here she is in bikini Click Her

Posted in:Vanessa Hudgens

2014

21

May

Dylan Penn Does Lingerie of the Day

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Here is tween Dylan Penn, who you may know as the daughter of Sean Penn and Robin Wright Penn, using her connected, privileged life…to model lingerie…

She’s’ 21, her body isn’t that great, but she’s hot enough to wear lingerie, and I’m not just saying that because everyone is good enough to be half naked, and I am not just saying it because of the trust fund, I don’t care about a bitch with family money…I just like celebrity kids because they are raised by egotistical self involved fucked up people with totally distorted realities…and I am a firm believer that leads to great cocaine…all in luxurious settings…I like it.

Posted in:Dylan Penn