DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2013

04

Apr

Kim Kardashian Disgusts Me of the Day

I find it totally fucking insane that people are posting these Kim Kardashian pictures today, because who cares about Kim Kardashian, especially not while walking around pregnant, after taking this whole eating for two cuz she can finally undo her belt buckle shit seriously, looking like a fucking farm animal, that should or would be better off sent to the slaughter house and put out of her bloated Octomom lookin’ misery, but instead sites are saying shit like “look how busty she is”….well she’s fucking pregnant, and massive, and even pre-pregnancy was a fucking pug who liked to get covered in mud…if you know what I mean….

So stop giving her attention, encourage any psycho friends you have to target her, tell North Korea her address so they know where to bomb if they go through with their plans, she’s the fucking worst thing to happen to society. A fucking terrorist, and so is her pussy and whatever evil she has brewing in it.

Or maybe, we as a people could collectively ignore her existence, and then with the magic of no one caring, she’ll do like Paris Hilton and disappear without violence.

Do your party, boycott the Kardashians. THanks.

That’s all I have to say about that….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Kim Kardashian

2013

04

Apr

Robert Downey Jr Gangnam Style for Korea of the Day

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So Robert Downey Jr is at the World Premiere of Iron Man 3 and they Koreans decided to try to relate to him the one way they know how – with Gangnam Style and he went along with it, in what is a weird fucking video, that I think is bridging the gap between the West and Korea, one horrible, internet sensation at a time. Not that North Korea is allowed internet….but maybe a spy will inform them that through dance, it will all be ok. Unless they find the whole thing racist and mocking their culture, which is kinda what I think is happening here.

Posted in:Robert Downey Jr

2013

04

Apr

Nicole Richie’s Horrible Panty Line of the Day

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Nicole Richie is a horrible person, and not just because even her own mother didn’t want her and threw her in the fucking dumpster outside a Lionel Richie concert like it was prom, where luckily for her, Lionel Richie picked her up and raised her as his own, giving her all the things her crackhead mom couldn’t, pretty much a lottery ticket that has lead to TV roles, socialite status, drug addiction, lame boyfriends and baby daddies, and clothing lines…when all she was supposed to do was die of an overdose in the projects at 16….or end up on the streets sucking dick for 5 dollars…but instead, instead she’s fucking hollywood.

But not Hollywood enough to not wear thick underwear to the gym. I’m guessing she’s on her period, or just has a leaky cunt filled with afterbirth, cuz whatever is going on here is fucking jokes, but then again the ass of a mom of two with gastric bypass surgery in leggings usually is, pantylines or not.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Nicole Richie

2013

04

Apr

Arianny Celeste and Brittney Palmer for FHM of the Day

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I am really not into Arianny Celesete or Brittney Palmer. They are America’s answer to Glamour Models, but all I see is pornstars, who would have done porn, but who instead got recruited by Dana White to be his ring girls, all implants and hard bodies and all, pretty much becoming these celebrities with so many fans as the sport gets more and more popular, ruining the chances of these Vegas showgirls/strippers, from really becoming what I like to think they were destined to become.

The only good thing about them is that they are fit, they slut out, and despite not showing spread pussy, they do still look good,

I mean their whole purpose is to straighten up the UFC’s gayness, a job that isn’t so hard to do, I mean the testosterone driven animals who watch the shit would fuck anything while pumped after a fight. Fat chicks or even old ladies, meaning they are a little overkill, and it doesn’t take much effort to do their job, but they still do it and now FHM is celebrating them as they hang on with a thread and here is their spread.

Here’s the behind the scenes video…

Posted in:Arianny Celesete|Brittney Palmer

2013

04

Apr

Karolina Kurkova Making Faces for Elle Czech of the Day

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Karolina Kurkova is my favorite model, turned plus sized and threatened to lose her job for being fat, because unlike working the cash at Walmart, modeling is the one job you can still fire a bitch for her gut without having letters written to head office, or media involvement saying you’re discriminating based on obesity levels, even though statistically, obese people are lazy and shitty for business. Only, Karolina Kurkova decided that instead of fighting them and making a scandal out of the evil corporation turning on her for being fat, she was going to do what was best for everyone involved, and that’s get in shape….so now, as she makes faces for Elle Czech….I can sit back and appreciate her for not giving in like so many other women do, she said “Slow metabolism, you can’t beat me”….and look how good it’s worked out. Take her advice all you fat bitches out there, cuz no one like a fat bitch. FACT.

Posted in:Karolina Kurkova

2013

04

Apr

Karlie Kloss for i-D Magazine of the Day

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When you realize that Karlie Kloss is 6 foot 2 or 6 foot 6 in heels, rockin a size 12 foot, she kinda loses any and all sex appeal. You know, put her against a white wall, and she’s proportionate, has a great figure, long and lean, with little tits and legs for fucking days, but stand next to her, and you become a fraction of the man you are, her shoulders broader than yours. It’s like a Universal Stuidos optical illusion, but when you put things into perspective, those feet are the length of your fucking arm.

But lucky for her, none of us will ever be next to her in line at the grocery store, or put up against her in a Volleyball match, we just see her in pictures, sometimes with other tall freak women, and I think it’s better for all of us that way. It’s less of a horror movie and more of a, holy fuck those are some serious legs.

Posted in:Karlie Kloss

2013

04

Apr

Beyonce Does Vogue Pantsless of the Day

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Beyonce and her whole pants off party kick drives me insane. I just don’t get what this cunt is thinking. I guess it is just a delusion or her ego saying “I’m Beyonce, and Beyonce doesn’t need pants”. Or it could be her attempt to compete with the younger pussy out there who don’t wear pants, mainly Rihanna, the pussy who makes more money for Jay Z than Beyonce, the one who gets in the way of her feeling like the queen in his world, or the object of affection in his eye, this is like some catty black girl competitiveness that Beyonce may be winning cuz the media love her, but that anyone jerking off will say is a huge fail, and to keep those costumes for Rihanna, cuz these 30+ mom tree trunk legs are fucking garbage, no matter how much they are worth. It’s just a rich bitch abusing her power in a weird pantsless way. I’m not diggin’ it.

Here are her fat thighs in a corporately sponsored dance off…fat thighs and all…cuz corporations want her star power and Beyonce loves herself…and money so it works.

Posted in:Beyonce

2013

04

Apr

Elsa Hosk Modeling Bikinis of the Day

1 Comment »

I hate catalog shots, but I like Elsa Hosk. The other day I did a Round UP Of Her Best Topless Pics She Took While Paving the Way to Becoming a Victoria’s Secret Model….because a titty model who aspires to be a lingerie model for the biggest underwear company has got to start somewhere and lucky for us, with this Swede, that somewhere involved nipples.

Here she is doing some sideline work for some other bathing suit company, I am sure the handlers at Victoria’s Secret are going to be very happy happy about this.

I fucking hat catalog shots, but Elsa Hosk, that bitch isn’t too bad.

Posted in:Elsa Hosk

2013

04

Apr

Stanija Dobrojevic is Lookin’ Like a Good Hooker on the Beach of the Day

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Stanija Dobrojevic is some Yugoslavian trashy hooker pussy on the beach lookin’ awesome and ready to be human trafficked as most USSR survivors are, it’s a cultural thing.

I’ve never heard of her before today but I have fucked a Yugoslavian in the 90s, so feel like we get each other,

My memory of fucking my Yugoslavian was that she peed on me once, so I peed back on her but more interestingly, I was fucking her from behind one day and she started to fucking groundhog, not sure it was a Yugoslavian thing, you know a flaring asshole with the tip of a hard shit poking out, but I do know it was a horrible, but not horrible enough to make me stop.

Posted in:Stanija Dobrojevic

2013

04

Apr

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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Smell the roses, or click this breath of fresh air . Spring.

I haven’t used a condom since the 19888 Olympics and I think even then I was using them to make water balloons. Which means all those crackheads I fucked over the last 3 decades let me in, skin on skin, and I was only one of many. Dirty.

The good news, AIDS is not a death sentence.

Here are some morning links….

Chubby Fat Tit Jill Martin Still in a Bikini
GO

Busta Rhymes Doesn’t Fuck Around When it Comes to Cheeseburgers
GO

Beyonce in Vogue Offends Me
GO

15 Actresses Who Were Replaced in Big Movies
GO

Slash Trolls Michael Jackson
GO

Little Kid Shits Herself on a Waterslide
GO

Babes in Towels are Pretty Alright.
GO

Accostic Cover of Lose Yourself by Eminem
GO

Headless Driver Drive Thru Prank…..
GO

The Science of Cats
GO

Triumph VS Real Housewives Atlanta
GO

Jimmy Fallon Replacing Leno Really Offends Me, But NBC is Run by Lorne Michaels, So it Makes Sense
GO

Kangaroos Boxing!
GO

True Facts of Truth
GO

Stop Balding!
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS