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2013

08

Mar

Nina Agdal for Aerie Bikinis of the Day

I normally find Nina Agdal looks like a waterhead…you know a real down syndromer…the kind of girl who should be wearing a hockey helmet around at the grocery story…and a pair of mittens so that she doesn’t start masturbating like a freak in public as most retarded people do…because they really aren’t retarded at all…but more advanced then us…proven by their massive alien heads…that in turn know if they play dumb…they will be cared for, get preferential parking, and most importantly can get away with saying mean shit in public, inappropriate shit in publc, pulling their genitals out in public, and grabbing at unsuspecting girl titties in public…being like “it’s okay I’m a retard…no no a legit retard…I am allowed to do this”…

But these pictures are different…her tits…her body…totally distracting and awesome….she should dress like this more often…and I am sure she will…you know with being a bikini model and all…bikinis iskinda her thing…

Posted in:Nina Agdal

2013

08

Mar

Courtney Stodden Hot Video Insanity of the Day

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Courtney Stodden put on a wig and decided to show off her shitty acting skills…via her character she created in her insane brain…that is a gothic…rocker lookin’ chick named Courtland…who calls out Stodden for being a slut…saying she’s her half sister….then goes on ripping into her about marrying D-Listed Saggy Ball old man….promotes her band called CumBallzofBlood….which sounds awesome….then she shits on Courtney for being not being real…and a gold digger….

Sounding drunk…in stockings…and lingerie spread and slutty…I feel like this is straight from the role play she saves for the bedroom that she’s now sharing with us….and I am forced to take all the negative I’ve said abotu her back…cuz Courtney Stodden…is a telent…a real fucking talent….

Posted in:Courtney Stodden

2013

08

Mar

Mila Kunis Pantsless for Allure of the Day

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Mila Kunis is alright….isn’t she? Who cares who’s dick she puts inside her unprotected…that she will likely marry…and have kids with…none of that matters….because she’s just pictures and videos to us….pictures and videos we should all collectively try to get pregnant by throwing our load at our computer screens…hoping for some technological glitch…like the movie Weird Science…

Seriously…she’s pretty fucking good….in this allure photoshoot….despite all the flaws in her and her personality…and her sex life and public image….because none of that affects us…but her pictures do….and I want to impregnate them…..

Posted in:Mila Kunis

2013

08

Mar

Tina Fey in her Bathing Suit of the Day

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I am a Tina Fey hater. I don’t find her interesting, clever, amazing, or attractive…..I don’t like funny girls…or girls who everyone think are funny and I don’t like their silly little chick jokes for chicks and not just cuz it is International WOmen’s day…but everyday….making her billions of dollars…even though everything about her and her humor annoys me….it’s just shit that talks to everyday 9-5 girls and whenever she is celebrated…I get annoyed….But I appreciate that she wears bikinis from the 1800s so that I don’t have to see her mom body….because her mom comedy is bad enough…

I guess Tina Fey’s not as horrible as I thought she was….but she is as horrible looking as I thought she was….proving I am always right…in some capacity or another…

Posted in:Tina Fey

2013

08

Mar

Kamilla Hansen Nipples on the Fashion Show Runway of the Day

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Kamilla Hansen is a 19 year old from Cabo de Santo Agostinho Brazil….she is 5 foot 10….and works as a fashion model….a topless fashion model who is walking the runway in Milan….all luxuriously…despite being little more than a glamour model….other than being taller and more attractive than one….because fashion is pornography….they just don’t want their advertisers or the models to know that…because if they did….they’d be stuck with gutter topless chicks and shitty sponsors who pay you very little….they are so clever those fashion people….and I appreciate that they are around cuz otherwise I’d never see this model’s tits….and I like seeing this model’s tits….

Posted in:Kamilla Hansen|NSFW

2013

08

Mar

Duckface Can’t Save Kate Upton of the Day

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Kate Upton making duckface doesn’t have the same impact as it does with teen girls on their facebook profile…you know making their cheekbones pop and their lips look voluminous….like they actually have some level of hotness to them….while for some reason it just makes cubby Kate Upton look like she’s chewing a big meal as fast as she can at the all you can eat buffet cuz there’s so much foot to get through in so little time……

I am not a fan of her sloppiness or her success…but she does have big tits that normally distract me from that….big tits she didn’t bring out in this pic…forcing us to see her for what she’s really worth….

Nothing can save her…I mean except those hangers….

Posted in:Kate Upton

2013

08

Mar

Dita Von Teese Topless in Pasties of the Day

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Dita Von Teese sucks. She’s just one of those right time/right place situations….a socially awkward nerd who found the internet in a time when the mainstream wasn’t on the internet….developing a fan base that was strong enough for the mainstream who hadn’t been on the internet and were slow to get on the internet to assume it meant she was famous….in what I like to call the “Tila Tequila Syndrome”….only I think Dita Von Teese was before Tila Tequila…but pretty much the same fucking story….dudes like bitches who get naked online and add them as friend on myspace…mainstream media find out about myspace and see dudes like girls by their friend count….recruiting them to be in their Playboy magazine….laying the foundation of a career as a 1940s obsessed Pin-Up/Burlesque icon who lacks any and all originality…who stirred the pot and got so many fat chicks involved in the movement…all sloppy with their nipple tassels on….when all Dita Von Teese shoulda really been was a lesbian pornstar…like her earlier work depicted….

So the internet made her a star…an artist…an icon in vintage stripping movement….but it ruined her lesbian porn career she was into when trying to get famous…..making her an all round fail…but here she is simulating toplessness regardless…

TO SEE PICS OF HER ROCKING CRAZY FUCKING CLEAVAGE
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Dita Von Teese

2013

08

Mar

Candice Swanepoel in Lingerie Pics We’ve Probably Already Seen Before of the Day

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Victoria’s Secret pics are like sex with your wife…or long term girlfriend…who you aren’t even really attracted to anymore…not because they aren’t decent looking….but because they have been drained of all excitement and sex appeal over the years of seeing them at their worst….from shitting…to being the same ass you fuck day after day…when all you really want to do is fuck new pussy…but feel torn because you’re not an asshole who would go behind your trusting girl’s back…but shit…you’d love new pussy…even if it wasn’t as hot….just the fact that it was new makes it hot….

You know…the familiar, comfortable, predictable, feels like home kinda pussy you don’t really appreciate as much as you should, but know that you don’t want to lose it….

Because these Victoria’s Secret pics are the fucking same as always..which makes them boring as shit….but the girls in them are hot enough….to make us want to look at them…even if we know what to fucking expect…and even if they don’t give us boners like they did when we were 15 in catalog form before the internet…

It’s familiar….comfortable…predictable…boring…like white people, they all look the same….but shit…this Candice bitch…is pretty spectacular in any setting….

Here are the pics…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2013

08

Mar

Emma Watson in “The Bling Ring” Trailer of the Day

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Everyone’s favorite hipster director….thanks to nepotism….Sofia Copoola….comes The Bling Ring….which is about the group of LA famous people obsessed kids who used the internet to track celebs and rob their homes….you probably remember that story…it was a big deal a few years ago…people like Paris Hilton, Rachel Bilson, Megan Fox and Lohan all got robbed….

Well the movie is comin’ out, and Emma Watson is in it, and this is the Trailer…and since I like the vibe of the movie and you’ve liked Emma Watson since she was 12 and you felt she’d grow up into a nice young girl…like you did with your neighbor’s kid…..I’m posting it…even though she’s far too clothed to really be bothering….but Emma Watson fans are weird and this is porn to them…..

Posted in:Emma Watson

2013

08

Mar

Holly Peers in Page 360 is the Glamour Model of the Day

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Holly Peers is today’s Glamour Model of the day….and she’s doing my new favorite thing….the Page 360 animated GIF…where she does a little spin in pictures….making it all not quite a video, not quite a picture, but 100 percent objectifying herself…saying look at my body…like we were doing some kind of audition and this was the casting couch…where I scope her up and down to make sure there are no flaws…which obviously their are…that’s what makes her a glamour model and not an actual model…but luckily the other reason she’s a glamour model involves showing her tits…instead of working a boring job as a waitress or whatever else her limited skill set would allow…and without topless models…who have actual big old titties like Oprah…

Posted in:Holly Peers|NSFW