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2013

06

Mar

Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore and Reese Witherspoon Together in Bikinis of the Day

I am not even going to bother posting the pics of Drew Barrymore and Reese Witherspoon in their bathing suits…Cameron Diaz is looking horrible enough for the group and she’s the fucking babe of the party….

I mean the idea of middle aged chicks in bikinis to being with is offensive as shit…keep you fucking bathrobe on bitches…no one wants to see this shit…not even your husbands…they are just with you cuz you’re famous…and allow them to fuck younger girls cuz you don’t want the public divorce….

I mean shit…just click the link…it’s that fucking bad…worse than showing up to a Caribbean resort in Blackface and expecting to get a laugh from the black locals…their behavior, thinking they can pull this off, is just as fucking offensive….it’s like say behind your rich person gated pool that security keeps the paparazzi away from….

Long are the days that they had sex appeal….not that I ever though doughy Barrymore ever had sex appeal…like you did that first time you saw ET…..and I never thought Witherspoon the vagina that trapped Ryan Philippe from fun with 12 kids was sexy….but jesus christ they looked a hell of a lot better than this….

Where they are now…is horrible…and the real sad thing in all this…is I would eat all their asses right after they took a shit and didn’t wipe…cuz I am a sick motherfucker…but that doesn’t mean I don’t think they look like shit….

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Posted in:Cameron Diaz|Drew Barrymore|Reese Witherspoon

2013

06

Mar

Karolina Kurkova is GIving Me Boners at and Event of the Day

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Karolina Kurkova is one of my favorite Victoria’s Secret models…but only because she made a serious comeback…she was on a downward spiral of fat chick syndrome…where she was so large she almost got fired….probably because of laziness and overeating….but that she blamed on her thyroid and that she starved herself to get out of…making me happy to stare at her her at events…dressed in sexy dresses…knowing she escaped a fate so many lazy chicks can’t escape…we had a close call, but we didn’t go down that road with this one…so she’s a fucking keeper….and that’s why she gives me boners…

Posted in:Karolina Kurkova

2013

06

Mar

How About Some Shailene Woodley Spiderman Nerd Shit for the Virgins of the Day

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Shailene Woodley, the new Mary Jane…because Kirsten Dunst is better suited to play a drunk 40 year old meth addict…because she is a drunk 40 year old meth addict…..is on set….walking to the diner where her character works….while filming the Amazing Spider-man 2 in New York….and that shit must make you virgin loser fan boy comic book weirdos go fucking nuts…like you must have climaxed all over your pants before you made it to the bathroom to whack off…cuz you mom hates when you do that in the living room while bushing her hair…you fucking weirdo….cuz all things comic books fuck with your orgasm threshold…you weirdo..

Shailene Woodley is not all that hot…but she is 21, so by default she’s a babe….

She’s from a show called The Secret Life of an American Teenager….which happens to be the ONLY show on TV that has given me a shout out in the last 5 years….I mean other than the occasional stolen joke….

Here are a few things I could find of her….to kinda hype her up a little and give you something a little better to jerk off to than her walkin around set….you fucking weirdos…I am just trying to make you feel a little more normal….

Here she is in a bikini for The Decendents (the movie not the band)

Here she is in some magazine shot by Drew Barrymore….missin’ the mark….but pics none the less….

Posted in:Shailene Woodley|Spiderman 2

2013

06

Mar

Behind the Scenes with the Springbreakers of the Day

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Vice met up with Harmony Korine, because Vice is New York cool…especially in the time when Harmony Korine was coming up in New York and really at his peak… so it is only fitting that they would sit down with him and go through some of his behind the scenes shit….cuz they have access and they are all friends…doing cool shit together…..and it’s a pretty interesting take from the perspective of the Director…talking about how Selena Gomez doesn’t like getting hump danced up against….and other shit you can watch on mute if you’re more interested in the bikini footage….the lots of bikini footage, and as a fan of Harmony Korine and his earlier smut…I can assume this will be the good or at least his biggest mainstream success that I will see….

Posted in:Springbreakers

2013

06

Mar

Jessica Alba’s Panty Flash of the Day

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I don’t know what is more offensive…the fact that she’s hanging with an Asian….dressed like an Asian…in what seems like she’s mockin’ and Asian….like a fat rich American Tourist in Japan dressed like a Gesiha girl….screaming at the locals for sushi….you know just inappropriate and not sensitive to other culture…..or the fact that she’s wearing underwear….

I remember a time when people would have died for this….but now that she’s a mom of two…it is suddenly far less interesting….in fact we kinda encourage her to keep the tights and panties on…because we don’t really want her mom pussy to throw off our impression of her…

But I really wanna see it….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

06

Mar

Candice Swanepoel’s Instagram Upsets Me of the Day

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I mean this is just asshole behavior on Candice Swanepoel’s part…she’s covering up the goods on both her and a massive picture of herself that I assume she carries around with herself everywhere she goes…cuz models are paid to look good and in that are really self conscious cunts about the whole thing….often times vain when they look at their bank accounts and when the photographers constantly give them attention while shooting them….for the fans to give them attention too…

It’s like come on girl…how many Candice Swanepoel nipples can be covered up in one single picture before I hate you….

Apparently 2 on the low end, 4 on the high end…..

But I can’t actually hate you, that would get in the way of my loving you….

Here are some of her instagram pics…

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2013

06

Mar

Miley Cyrus in a Tight Shirt Photoshoot of the Day

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The fail in this photoshoot is simple…they focused in on Miley’s face…which is really not what anyone really cares about when it comes to Miley Cyrus….it is boyish, not overly sexy or even pretty….but rather just there….an attachment or accessory to her tight little fit body that she maintains through yoga, starvation and most importantly….hormone therapy thanks to the team at Disney keeping her young a vibrant until she breaks free from their trap and takes up actual hard drugs….cuz Disney and their promises of fame….their creepy execs who like kids a little too much and their “Kool Aid”….is the gateway drug to falling the fuck apart….and eventually destroying your life/family/self….but before all that happens…there is the window Miley is in that is hot….and the photographer behind this one shoulda focused the camera a little be more on her ass….but I’ll still look at her in her prison striped shirt…cuz it is so representative of her existence…imprisoned in the life of a famous girl….imprisoned in her mansion…imprisoned by her fans and the leeches who make money of her’expectations….it is all very sexy…..

Posted in:Miley Cyrus

2013

06

Mar

Kimberly Garner Gives Us a Glimpse Into her Soul of the Day

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The ever important….Kimberly Garner….who I have never heard of and I assume you haven’t heard of either….has flashed….probably because it is the only thing that gets her picked up in the media….but also because her vagina is her lifeline and the only reason she even gets pictures taken of her for the opportunity to flash her panties….to get into the media….because I know for fact based on my opinion of these trash can women on TV….is that her Inner thighs, in all their fuzzy glory, are the gateway to her soul….a soul that she can thank for whatever successes she has….and by soul I mean her lady parts….now if only she slid those panties to the side a bit…I mean then we’d have a fucking picture….

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Posted in:Kimberly Garner

2013

06

Mar

Katia Ivanova for Page 360 is Today’s Glamour Model of the Day

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Katia Ivanova is Today’s Glamour model of the day….and not because she’s hot….not that any Glamour models are really hot…in fact they are all so flawed…whether short and dumpy to justify those big tits…or bad faced…like a stripper who you don’t really care sucks as long as she’s showing some titty…..that’ why they are called Glamour models and not actual models….not that they care…they are making money and getting famous with their tits….

Katia Ivanova is Today’s Glamour model of the day…because she married a Rolling stone in his late 60s to get famous..before her beat her up for being the opportunist cunt trying to get ahead via his flacid, need of viagra dick…..and that’s some groupie shit I find funny….

So she’s not hot, her ass sucks, her legs suck, her tits are alright, she’s got a funny story and probably a few STDS….and that is good enough for me…but in my defense…I’d fuck anything…

Posted in:Katia Ivanova|NSFW

2013

06

Mar

Claudia Romani in Her Bikini of the Day

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Claudia Romani is proof the paparzzi are bored as fuck.

She’s some 30 year old trash with a hot body from Italy…who hasn’t done much but get a few gigs modeling in Europe….enough to afford moving to Miami to live the American dream…

She won some VH1 best bikini body of 2012 contest….which I assume means absolutely nothing to anyone but her….and has since been in her bikini every fucking day…something I endorse…but do not understand why sites are keeping track of her….

Her face is average at best…and shit, being FHM and Maxim in Italy 5 years ago is hardly enough reason to be followed around…she must be sleeping with the paparazzi for exposure….in “Please submit my pics to the blogs, I need attention” kind of way….

Cuz I keep seeing her everywhere….yet she’s a nobody…

I mean I follow way hotter miami chicks on Instagram who are always in their bikinis…maybe they paparazzi should start following them and turning them into pseudo celebs…famous for nothing….getting them perks like cutting the line at the club….

Who cares…….

That said…her ass is awesome….click the link to see it….in all its bikini glory….

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Posted in:Claudia Romani