DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2012

11

Dec

Erin Heatherton Bikini Pics of the Day

My man Leonardo DiCaprio’s hired new model pussy Erin Heatherton…the new star of Victoria’s Secret…cuz her body is fucking amazing…and her klout score probably high…thanks to having had A-Lister cock in her….when he can have his A-Lister cock in anything…and probably was putting his A-Lister cock in anything while putting his A-Lister cock in her and pretending they were exclusive cuz he was paid by Victoria’s Secret to help market their girls….and cuz girls like A-Lister’s giving them attention and let A-Listers do whatever they want as to not ruin what they have with the A-Lister….cuz A-Lister cock…comes all kind of perks…and I’m not talking about the probable STDs…I’m talking the A-Lister life of fucking luxury….

The story is they broke up….but the good news is that this Erin Heatherton is now an A-List model and can get all those perks on her fucking own….not to mention she can lure more A-Lister cock in…cuz she played this shit right…I appreciate her hustle….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Erin Heatherton

2012

11

Dec

Elisandra Tomacheski Models Bikinis of the Day

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I don’t know about you…but I love nice round ass in bikinis, underwear, jeans, naked, any which way….especially when it is attached to a pair of long and luxurious legs….and a skinny little body….with hot tits….and a lovely face…it’s kinda my thing…and it’s so hard to find you know with being unemployed and all…but I take what I can get…and I figure I can always imagine the vile filth I stick my dick in is in fact something I’d consider worth fucking…and pictures like this aid in that process while I’m getting AIDS….from people who didn’t get AIDS in their native Brazil cuz their first boyfriend had unprotected with a tranny one night on the beaches of RIO….

Her name is Elisandra Tomacheski – she’s in her mid-late 20s…she’s from Brazil and she’s one of the few Brazilian models that Victoria’s Secret didn’t buy on the model trade….but probably should have…cuz she’s spectacular….and here she is modeling bikini…looking good.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
FOLLOW THIS LINK

Posted in:Elisandra Tomacheski

2012

11

Dec

Lucy Pinder is a Busty Christmas Gift in NUTS of the Day

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Lucy Pinder’s tits won’t be under your Christmas Tree….but if you’re looking for gifts you can always check out the VERY MERRY STEPFATHER GIFT GUIDE ….we got tits of our own in there…and awesome gifts…that make endorsing a magazine’s busty model on her comeback tour for some magazine seem counter productive…when our own thing is so much better…I mean shit, Lucy Pinder is alright, her tits huge, dressed and wrapped up like Santa’s wet dream, the reason he comes on his red suite but OUR MODELS ARE BETTER>….and sure I may be saying that cuz they let me grab their tits and ass, or cuz they have sex and masturbate in porn and their own sites, while Lucy Pinder is too cool for me…and what it comes down to is tis the season of goodwill towards men, givivng and spending time with those you love….and there’s enough room in my stalking for all kinds of tits…if you know what I mean….

Posted in:Lucy Pinder

2012

11

Dec

Ariana Grande’s Got a Bra Top For Instagram of the Day

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I don’t really know if this is a bra over a shirt, or a bra built into a shirt, or if it is lingerie being worn as a shirt, I just know that if she was my daughter, I wouldn’t be into this kind of behavior, because taking pics of yourself like this, implies nothing wholesome, and inspires nothing wholesome, and if anything, is some inappropriate. self loving, behavior…but that’s just the times we are living in, camera phones, social media, whore celebrity leaders and icons for our kids to look up to, the sex tape celebrity billionaires, and so on and so forth….lead to self produced, youthful porn, that inspire otherwise decent human beings to masturbate to things that they otherwise never would, leading to teachers banging students, and sex offenders everywhere…it’s a viscous cycle, and this iCarly star, even at 19….looks 13…and that makes this pornography…and amazing…

Posted in:Ariana Grande

2012

11

Dec

Candice Swanepoel Athletic for VSX of the Day

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Candice Swanepoel has a fit fucking body….sure her career depends on it…and she’s living large, making easy fucking money, that is in fact stupid money, because of that career that depends on her body….motivating her 20 days off a month to be spent working on her fitness….cuz it’s the best option for her….cuz she, like anyone else, oulda chose cake and candy and fries….working a desk job….like so many potentially hot girls if they weren’t buried in disgusting….and I think we should thank her for taking the right path…cuz a body like this is a glorious thing to stare at and without it…we have nothing…and there’s no point in living…maybe I’m just being dramatic….the HOLIDAYS GET ME EMOTIONAL …..

Here are the pics….

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2012

11

Dec

Jerry Hall’s Bush in an Upskirt of the Day

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There is something amazing about bush…I figure it is because the bald pussy really got played out over the late 90s and 2000s…making it standard and repetitive for those of us who see and eat pussy…making the random bush you come across, or cum all over exhilerating and exciting….you know something different, something original, something natural and traditional, something that hasn’t been ruined by Kim Kardashian or the cast of Jersey Shore like it was a Brazilian wax…

Unfortunately, old lady Jerry Hall isn’t really helping my case here, because her bush is on an old lady, as most bush should be, thanks to old ladies being from the Bush generation, moms before the whole bald pussy thing really happened, so she’s no ambassador here, she’s just like every over 45 year old who thinks Bald pussy is creepy….but let me tell you, bush on a 25 year old, who is going against the grain to have bush, because they get the importance of decorating a pussy like it was a Chirstmas tree the way nature intended, is fucking awesome…

Either way, here’s a great pantyless, hairy pussy, old lady upskirt….

Posted in:Jerry Hall

2012

11

Dec

Kim Kardashian Lingerie Pics for Factice of the Day

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In some horrible decision making between the creative director, editor in chief and the marketing department over at Factice magazine’s morning meeting….Kim Kardashian’s fat body was shot in lingerie….and unfortunately, not with a fucking elephant gun.

She got half naked, in what would be sexy outfits, if it was on some hot, tight bodied girl, waiting for you to come home from work….or even on your dumpy ass wife who has given you the gift of children and who you are codependent and in love with enough to see past the fact that she’s ravaged her body…from vagina to GUNT to tits…..all for you…and appreciate her putting on something to add some excitement in your otherwise boring as fuck relationship that is comfortable…and that you are used to….but when it is on Kim Kardashian, someone who no one finds hot, who has had her time to shine, and who likely offends 98 percent of the population who know she exits, this has gone too far and has gone on far too long, and should never have happened, and should never happen again…..

These pics remind us that she should retire gracefully, even if you’re a pig who can’t be graceful in anything you do….she’s got all the money in the world, and doesn’t need to be humiliating herself while irritating us, and above all…she’s got a sister she can exploit who is built like an actual model, who we’d all rather see half naked…

Get it together. you prime example of the horrible side effects of positive affirmations….

Here are some pics…they depress me.

Posted in:Kim Kardashian

2012

11

Dec

Emily Ratajkowski Naked for Lovecat Magazine of the Day

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Emily Ratajkowski is the kind of aspriring model who will pose nude as often as fucking possible, because she’s got a fantastic body, and a great set of fake tits, and is pretty much one small step away from being a stripper….but isn’t seen as a stripper…because her shoots are “artistic” and for fashion….not to mention she has an IMDB page…and has had some small acting roles…and is just doing the LA thing as hard as she can so that she doesn’t have to move back home when she runs out of money with her tail between her legs, forced to work for her dad’s company, instead of being the big superstar she moved to LA to be….you know making all the moves so that she can get noticed, pay the rent, and not have to lower herself to be a waitress like this was Hollywood in the 80s, before everyone who movied their could become a social media celebrity all the studios want to work with cuz they have no idea what new media is…

That said, she’s showing her tits, and I guess that’s all I really should be focusing on, so look at the pics and ignore all my whining words, which is something you’re as accustomed to as this Emily Rata chick is with being nude on camera…you jerk.

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski|NSFW

2012

11

Dec

Glamour Models in Pabo La Magie 2013 Calendar of the Day

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Holly Peers, Nicole Neal, Staci Noblett and a bunch of other Glamour Models are showing off their tits, because that’s kinda what they do….

When you have tits like this…and no other real marketable skill because when you first realized you had tits like this…you also realized that you didn’t need waste your time trying to find a career….as good things always come to those built like this…especially when those built like this don’t mind exploiting being built like this…and as someone who isn’t paying them to show off their tits…not even a strip club cover charge…but instead getting the pics for free, on someone elses dime…I can’t really complain….cuz free tit pics, whether high production with professional strippers for a calendar or just a gift emailed to me…are always lovely….

So here is some Pabo La Magie, whatever that is, 1920s Circus inspired calendar, because the only people who use Calendars were likely born and raised in the 1920s, and this reminds their stroked out minds of their youth…