DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2012

02

Jul

Ashley Greene in August 2012’s Esquire Looking Hot of the Day

Ashley Greene irritates me….I have no real reason to be irritated by her…I mean I don’t think I’ve ever seen a move she’s been in, I don’t really get up on all her self-promoting bullshit, I just know she was in Twilight to reach a young fanbase…..then she started dating a Jonas brother, despite his virginity marketing spin, and a chick who pretends to be a virgin is the kinda shit I’m just not into….especially when it isn’t for in bedroom role playing, you know playing “naughty student punished by gym teacher” games….but instead for the media….it is just not authentic…and I am all about popstar, teen dream trash being authentic when they are playing the part…you know own the fact you’re a coked up slut, instead of years later when they don’t matter, are forgotten and dying of drug overdoses cuz they are really just tormented souls….

You get what I am saying, and that is that she’s bullshit, a money making pawn, but she’s looking good in Esquire, and they cant’ take that away from her….

Who cares. Here are the pics.

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Posted in:Ashley Greene|Photos

2012

02

Jul

Sofia Vergara Twitter Bikini Pics of the Day

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Sofia Vergara is in Capri….posing on Yachts in a bikini like she was some 20 year old…even though she’s 40…reminding everyone that if you have fat tits, you might as well attempt to follow your dreams cuz eventually your singlye mother destined to be a stripper destiny can shift…all depending on who’s penis you put inside you…cuz even if it took her 20 years to get there…she still made it fucking happen…even if it was through prostitution….and now she’s the one sitting on yachts today, while I’m the one in three day old underwear with what I think is either BBQ sauce or chocolate melted in my hairy chest thanks to no air conditioning….but then again it’s not really a who has won situation, since I never got up on this race, but I can tell you, most single mom’s I know from South America, aren’t doing Hollywood shit so that’s gotta count for something, even if in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t fucking matter at all….

Posted in:Sofia Vergara

2012

02

Jul

Ashley Tisdale Shitty Bikini Pic for Twitter of the Day

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20 Minutes ago….a miracle that isn’t a miracle at all occured….Ashley Tisdale posted a picture of her in a bikini top on Instagram and thousands of people “Liked” it….thne she deleted it…..

But thousands of people care about her and her posting bikini top pictures that she deemed ugly…because they focus more on her broken down face and less on her fit body and tits…even though that is what matter…and all it took for these 1000s of people to like her shit…was being cast on some shitty show 5 years ago…only to do nothing since…making her relevant according to society…and don’t really care, and I’m not gonna hate, cuz I always encourage physically and mentally disabled people…whether they are born that way or a product of a horrible nose job….to get out there and do something….I am a hero like that…

THen she posted this pic…where she doesn’t look like her busted self…while hanging with other girls I’d totally fuck…Instagram magic I guess….

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale

2012

02

Jul

Selena Gomez in her Bikini of the Day

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Selena Gomez is young bodied, looks like she’s 12 thanks to Disney Genetically Modifying her, but she’s not 12, allowing you to live out all your dirty fantasies on her, like you were Usher Raymond doing the MJ on Bieber like he was Culkin, if you know what I mean…and if not you can just stare at the bikini pics, possible implant tits, on a girl who is doing what sh can to matter in some self produced bikini pics…and I dig it…

Posted in:Selena Gomez

2012

02

Jul

Maria Menounos in her Bikini for Twitter of the Day

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I wonder if when Maria Menounos FLASHES HER VAGINA ON THE BEACH ….if it is something she is embarrassed by, or if it is like a regular girl showing ass crack, you know cuz as an unmarried greek girl, she’s only taking it up her ass and her vagina, the one for husbands babies, not the one for shitting and boyfriends, becomes secondary….I’d ask her but I don’t have her number….

What I do have is her self produced twitter bikini pics that I’m pretty fucking into, cuz her body is hot, and I’m kinda forced to be a fan of really all girls who are into anal, which so far has been all girls I meet, seriously, I haven’t met a girl who doesn’t take it up the ass, I guess cuz anal is the number one form of birth control behind abortion…or maybe cuz anal makes them feel like dirty little prison rape whores….or maybe I just have a tiny penis and they are just hoping to feel something…

Posted in:Maria Menounos

2012

02

Jul

Some Random Unknown Paz de la Huerta Nudes of the Day

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I am a fan of Paz de la Heurta cuz she’s on some gutter slut kick…and I was actually pretty amazed by the fact that she actually got work on TV back in the Boardwalk Empire days before getting fired…you know cuz she looks like some rich kid who has an artist loft in New York that she uses to fuck everyone as she fucks herself up with various drugs cuz daddy was too busy working and fucking the secretary to make her feel secure in her privileged self life…..but I was probably only a fan cuz she was always naked and rocking a hipster bush that coincidentally maintained historical continuity….cuz all other girls they auditioned were bikini waxed and that just wouldn’t work for a 1920s whore….

Either way, since her being fired, she’s been in a lot of nude shoots, staying relevant and thus staying awesome and I dig it….

No idea when this one is from, but I like it, it’s an opitical illusion and shit….trippy.

Posted in:NSFW|Paz de la Huerta

2012

02

Jul

Saskia de Brawuw in a Bathing Suit for V Magazine of the Day

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Saskia de Brauw is some model who I have POSTED NUDE PICS OF BEFORE ….because she is willing to get naked for fashion, or for photographers, and probably for anyone willing to give them a shot, and that’s the kind of work ethic I look for in a wife….

She’s unfortunately not being utilized to her full willing to get naked potential, but seeing her in her one piece bathing suit is kinda hot, tapping into fantasies of the late 80s and early 90s, when the girls we rolled with didn’t do bikinis, and hiding fat stomach at the beach was all the fucking rage…something a few of you pigs may want to re-visit…you see cuz just because bikinis are popular…doesn’t mean they are for everyone.

Posted in:Saskia de Brauw

2012

02

Jul

Olivia Munn Topless in Magic Mike of the Day

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Olivia Munn is an attention seeking bottom feeding slut who made the common mistake that is often made by girls who want to be famous once they reach a certain level of fame without realizing they’ve peaked and instead think they’ve only just begun….I mean reality was she was on G4TV, a show I assume less than 100,000 people watch a day, which is pretty pathetic in terms of TV fame….I mean their youtube videos of their scamming, pretend they are into tech for nerds who watch them and assume they are dream girls, only get 10,000 views….proving that they don’t matter, but that’s hard to really decipher when the fans you do have are so loyal to you, even more loyal to you than they are to their virginity….

So she quits her one good thing to be a famous actor or something she always wanted….and instead, a few years later, she’s taking nude parts in the biggest movies she can find…when she thought she was gonna be headlining the shit…and I think this is the best she’s ever been…usually I hate her much more…..I guess titties have a calming effect….

Posted in:NSFW|Olivia Munn|Photos

2012

02

Jul

Jenny McCarthy Nude in Playboy of the Day

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I don’t know how I feel about Jenny McCarthy posing naked in Playboy a couple decades later in efforts to get some attention cuz it worked for her the first time around…20 years ago….

On one side her tits are probably only 16, so in ways it is jailbait, but on the flipside she’s not 16….and then on one side she’s getting naked for cameras and I like seeing all girls naked….but on the flipside she’s not 16…

Sure she’s ok for a 50 year old…but still a fucking 50 year old….But maybe I just fear her autism creating pussy.

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Posted in:Jenny McCarthy|Photos

2012

02

Jul

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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We have a new site. Changing the game. Going to takeover the internet…or not…you see cuz I like naps…and I’m already fucking models…will keep you posted….but expect a lot of sitting and very few private jets….

This is my first post using the new site. Wonder if it works….

LOL Cat Video of the Day – VIDEO
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Real Life Hot Wheels Track!!! WTF?!
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Free Cam Shows For Some Monday Pleasure (NSFW)
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JWoww – Still Disgusting
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This Just In: Jackie Chan is AWESOME – VIDEO
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Three Girlfriends Get Crazy on Video – VIDEO (NSFW)
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Gallery: The 10 Creepiest Costumes Worn By TV Characters
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Posted in:stepLINKS