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2011

10

Aug

Woman Eating Husbands Dead Ashes is Hysterical of the Day

I saw this episode of My Strange Addiction last week and I keep talking about it with everyone I run into….unfortunately, none of the riff raff and goons I hang out with watch TLC….and if they do it is for Toddlers and Tiaras and that’s just fucking perverted and when that gets brought up I change the subject cuz any grown man who admits to watching that shit, is jerking off to that shit…

That said, this chick lost her husband to an asthma attack, she clearly wasn’t expecting to ever be married and after tricking a motherfucker into it, only to have him die, making her realize she was destined to die alone, clearly fucked with her head hard and made her carry his ashes around like a kid carries a pillow…like a security blanket but being the fat bitch she is…she decided to start eating him cuz I guess she was hungry and figured it was the only way to have him inside her making the whole thing all the weirder….

This damaged mental case is highly entertaining. God knows why she went on TV but I’m glad she did….

Posted in:Viral Video

2011

10

Aug

Bar Refaeli is a Dirty Girl in her Dead Sea Twitter Bikini Pics of the Day

5 hours ago – Bar Refaeli posted these bikini pics of her in Dead Sea mud….rocking the peace in the middle east campaign that is her bikini body…muddy pussy….hot tits…you get what I’m saying here….and that is look at the pics…

On a sidenote, Bar Refaeli has blocked me on Twitter, even after all the kindness I say about her…I get no respect…what a cunt…a cunt I’d like to fuck…all dirty, covered in feces and herpes scabs or not…She’s that good.

Posted in:Bar Refaeli

2011

10

Aug

Liz Leyda is a Former Miss Utah I want to Fuck of the Day

This bitch was Miss Utah 2006 and I guess that gave her Mormon ass the taste of fame and idea that when she turned 21, she’d move to California and try to make it on her own as the celebrity she thinks she is, you know cuz winning Beauty Pageants fucks a bitch up, partially cuz their moms over encourage them for years, but also because the rest of the circuit does to when you win…

So she’s in LA…she’s hitting up the clubs and hot spots….she’s getting noticed by the paparazzi…and she’s loving every second of it…which means staged bikini pics, possible sex tape, definite panty flash, and more low level goods to come…and I’m digging it cuz I want to fuck her face but would settle for her ass or pussy…if you know what I mean…

I still don’t know who the fuck she is…but I like her just fine that way…it’s easier to like unknowns who love attention cuz you know nothing about all the things you do that you’d normally hate so much it takes away from wanting to fuck them…but I’m ready for all that to change, she’s on a mission…in red…cuz she must be expecting her period and not in the mood to risk it…

Posted in:Liz Leyda

2011

10

Aug

Kim Kardashian’s Fat Ass and Fake Skin Rash of the Day

Normally, I love girls with rashes….but in Kim Kardashian’s case, I find it disgusting…more importantly, in Kim Kardashian’s case I don’t even believe it is really a rash, cuz she’s the kind of trash who would hire a make-up artist to make her have an ailment that she can get press about, but I’ll accept her bullshit and appreciate the effort as I stare at her fat ass imagining this psoriasis actually being scabies she got in a seedy hotel room turning tricks, or even better, as the flesh eating disease that will ultimately kill her…I’m a pervert like that.

Posted in:Kim Kardashian

2011

10

Aug

Sofia Vergara Tit’s Busting Out of a Button Down Shirt of the Day

Sofia Vergara represents the American dream…you now coming to America from a South American country as a young single mother…only to end up winning Emmy Awards 20 years later…all because of a great set of tits…cuz that’s all it takes..you know coupled with exploiting yourself, trading your dignity and cashing in your morals and values in exchange for the good life you always dreamed of, a small sacrifice to make with your vagina and great tits to help the next generation of your family not become a statistic….

These great tits, have done it right and for that…I’d like to honor her efforts by staring at her whore tits…

Posted in:Sofia Vergara

2011

10

Aug

Brooke Burke’s Wild On in Her Bikini with her Kids of the Day

Wild On loses it’s appeal when you’ve got a kid…It’s like not so Wild On…So Wild I’m in bed at 9 On…So that I can wake up at 6 am and deal with my brat who ruined by vagina but I still have my fake tits and a decent bikini body as memories of my career on Wild On..cuz that’s the only thing I can use to evaluate or quantify my self worth…because it is the only thing my self worth has been based on my entire life…So Wild On that instead of rager all nighter, the only event I attend at night is the resort daycare to watch kid movies…we only get wild on once a month to help plan the dream family we’re creating as we live off all the money from Wild On….Depressing maybe, hard faced and older sure, but still in a bikini and that works for me….the tail, bi product, remnants of Wild On like some archeological dig…the bikini version….and that works for me.

Posted in:Brooke Burke

2011

10

Aug

Leighton Meester is the Poor Man’s Blake Lively of the Day

And luckily I’m a poor man…you know unable to grasp the Blake Lively hard face appeal, as she’s all famous and fashionable, dating superstars like Leonardo DiCaprio and letting his penis cum inside her cooter, making golden star studded and diamond encrusted creampies the average person can’t grasp or really wrap our brain around cuz it’s on some other level of superhuman…..but Leighton Meester….she’s some low level fetish video star born in a halfway house who managed to suck dick to get on TV…making her almost like one of us, on our level…or at least like one of the strippers I got a lap dance from last night…or hooker I asked if she was a virgin cuz I figure the world lacks virgin street whores…or even like one of the massage parlor girls who jerks me off and gives me a receipt I can use to get reimbursed by my wife’s insurance policy…only not as awesome cuz she doesn’t make me cum the way they do….cuz instead of being in the service business she should be, she took the right turns and choices in her prostitution that led Leighton to this level of accessible, yet famous enough to be impressive 10 years down the road when she’s back to starring in fetish videos when paying her extra to suck you off after a signing of her latest DVD at your local sex shop…at least that’s what I’m predicting…

Posted in:Leighton Meester

2011

10

Aug

Erin Heatherton in her Bikini of the Day

This bitch is killing me…what a fucking body. White bikinis are my fucking favorite….especially when a bitch gets her period in one on the snorkeling tour you’re about to go on during your Mexican vacation but also when it turns see through and the bitch has no fucking idea….allowing me to see every pubic hair stubble, pussy lip flap, clit hood wrinkle she’s got whenever she gets wet…genius…but not as genius as Erin Heatherton’s body…have you seen this body? It’s next level great….

Either way, here she is doing some Victoria’s Secret nonsense that give her that model stamp of approval in exchange for selling her soul….awesome…

Posted in:Erin Heatherton

2011

10

Aug

Emma Roberts Lesbian Date of the Day

I want to have sex with Emma Roberts’ lesbian friend’s tits in this see through tank top…all push-up bra….Shit if I was Emma Roberts, I’d go lesbian for those tits too….Hell if I was Emma Roberts, I’d probably go lesbian anyway, thanks to having no male role model growing up, just a negative experience with a self involved drug user who felt sorry for himself for never getting an academy award role, after winning an academy award…I’m talking shitty low quality b-movie after shitty low quality movie never quite reaching that high again…as his sister moved in, took all his glory, leading to more self destructive behavior that was probably a lot of fun, but hardly good for your daughter….unless you’re like me and think daddy issues are genius and if they don’t turn you dyke they turn you fucking slutty and both are fun to point at laugh at…and one of those daddy issues side effects feels real great on your dick…

Either way, here’s celebrity in training, Emma Roberts on a lesbian date.

Posted in:Emma Roberts

2011

10

Aug

Bar Refaeli in Some Bikini Pictures of the Day

You’d think an ass like this would bring peace in the middle east. You know all those Palestinians would put down their rocks and forget their hatred for the jews for fucking their country…and put serious effort in hitch hiking to Tel Aviv and parking themselves outside Bar Refaeli’s apartment and wait for her to come home…only to see her ass in motion…but I guess the Palestinians are too busy repressing their women, plotting world domination, and whatever it is that arabs do….see I’m not all that into politics, but I am into pussy, so much that I know an ass like this is far more important to me than deep rooted issues that have been plaguing my people for hundreds of years…I’m too into the now than to worry about the bullshit that’s not fun, drunk or half naked….

Here she is in a photoshoot proving her quality ass that deserves to be in a bikini….and the rumor is that she’s not even the hottest bitch in Israel, the rumor is that you wouldnt even notice Bar Refaeli on the beach amongst the other Israelis and that’s just enough to make my testicles explode…just thinking about it…making me happy I’m sitting on a soiled couch across from an obese woman choking on her own neck fat….you know to prevent me from really enjoying my life….

Posted in:Bar Refaeli