I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

24

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

The highlight of my week has not been grabbing Gaga’s ass, holding hands with Fergie, or even being on the Seacrest radio show or at a party with all women, but walking my dog at 4 am only to come across a topless 18 year old lookin’ dude and a topless 18 year old lookin girl making out in the middle of the fuckin’ street. I kepted creeping around the block to see if they got bottomless, but instead the caught onto me by the fourth time I walked by them, and they got dressed and went to finish up elsewhere. I can’t do anything right.

I didn’t post today because of shitty internet, I’m still alive, just barely, but that’s nothing new, I figure it all end any day now, you know just creep up on me from no where, at least that’s been the whole point of all these years of hard drinkin, not to be morbid or anything, I’m just an adrenaline junky who is neither athletic or into extreme sports, so I get my brushes with death the old fashioned way, and that’s through unprotected sex, hard drinking, smoking, drug use, and poking myself with syringes I find in the park to see what happens….which I don’t recommend, because hepatitis happens more often than staph infections and HIV, and that shit just fucks with your drinkin’….true story.

Here are my links for the day….

Get Your Web Came Slut On
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Kathy Lee Gifford’s Got Talent
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Artistic Toothpaste Shamings
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These Girls Can Sexually Harass Me Anytime
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Little Asian Bikini Contest Girl
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Fun with a Sex Toy Helicopter
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Man, Something About Jennifer Lopez Lately Makes Me Horny
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7 Types of Cockblockers
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Poker with a Slut. Nice
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Striptease of the Day
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Whoever Is In Charge of Marketing for Burger King Should Get a Raise
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Jonathon Rhys Meyers is My Kind of Drunk
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Courtney Love is a Crazy Walking Skeleton
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Topless Movie Babes Throwback
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Zac Efron & Breckin Meyer Parody Perez Hilton And It’s Actually Pretty Amazing
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Darryl Hannah Got Arrested
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Ilga in the Woods
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Marilyn Manson, It’s Time to Pack It In, Cause You Are Losing Your Mind
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Kid Crashes Dads Car
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Red Head Hottie
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Elena and a Big Dildo
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Bolivian TV Reporters Need to Check Their Facts
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she Likes the Nasty Boys!
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Angelina Jolie for President?
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Cartoon or Not, I Would Still Bang CLEO
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Louise Glover and Triniana Iglesias topless
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Now That’s An Ass I’d Like to Be All Over
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Meet Gwen
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Here Come The Lady GaGa Drones…Ugh
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Brandy Talore and Her 36DDDs!!!
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And Another Glorious Red Head
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Kelly Clarkson is Right About Perez Hilton
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Triumph the Insult Comic Dog!
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Of Course They Can’t Count, They Are Pornstars, Not Astronauts
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Okay, Well Dakota Fanning Just Made Me Want to Puke
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Slash and Conan O’Brian Went Guitar Shopping Off Craigslist
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Weird Chicks On Acid AT Festivals ARe Always Good For a Laugh
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The Five Stages of a Drunken Night
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9 Hottest Filipino Women…..
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

24

Jun

Megan Fox Lickin’ Her Lips of the Day

Here’s Megan Fox, the hottest thing in Hollywood, for the time being, because I accidentally bought myself a pair of briefs at the bootleg underwear store and I’ve been sporting them the last couple days and feel fuckin’ sexy, so sexy that I may just walk myself into the bathroom and cut of my dick in hopes to move to Hollywood and suck dick to the top, never having anyone know that I was once a dude, only to take away the limelight away from this whore as the next hot thing, but I’m sure that’s all just wishful thinkin’ on my part, I mean I can never be a hot little starlet everyone wants to fuck, but I can jerk off to one, even though jerking off is the lamest form of contraceptive, I mean other than condoms, everyone knows abortion is the way to fuckin’ go.

Maybe I’ll just dress my wife up like a really fat, ugly, sweating and smelly version of one and have her read off lines from some of Megan Fox’s most memorable performances, not that I ever want to fuck my wife, or that Megan Fox has memorable performances, but I do want to get the fuck out of this post it’s even too weird for me…so here’s some Megan Fox lickin’ her lips at a fan, because lickin’ lips, dicks, and anus, is really the foundation of her
career….

To See The Rest of the Pictures Follow This Link
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Posted in:Lips|Megan Fox|Tongue

2009

24

Jun

Hilary Duff is in Her Bikini of the Day

Here’s some Stuff by Hilary Duff that I guess she’s been accumulating in the event of famine striking so that she can “live off the land” for a couple extra days, you know like she’s using her stomach as it’s very own emergency food pantry or backpack filled with supplies, in the event of a nuclear strike or natural disaster, or maybe it’s just her own way to pad herself naturally to survice those Hockey Locker Room Gangbang her boyfriend puts her thru after every game to build team morale, but I have a feeling it’s got more to do with her being lazy, settling down and gettin’ older cuz guess what, she’s not 16 anymore and I’m sure that hurts all of your deeper than I can really understand. Perverts.

Posted in:Bikini|Hilary Duff

2009

24

Jun

Amy Winehouse is in her Sports Bra of the Day

I love watching dogs sniff women’s pussies. I used to know this half retarded/half psycho kid who trained his dog to sniff pussy and when the dog would do it to strangers, he’d point and scream shit like “you’re on the rag” and shit like that and I’d always get a laugh as the elderly woman, who clearly wasn’t on the rag walked away in confusion, but a little flattered that someone would suggest she wasn’t a dried up old cunt.

In these pictures the dogs are chasing Winehouse and it is not because she has her period, or because that weird dude trained them to do it, but because she smells like rotting flesh and dog’s love rotting meat and apparently with the kind of women I can seduce (afford), so do I.

So here’s some Winehouse in her bikini top showing the world how she maintains her trim figure with exercise because she’s a fuckin’ athlete in athletic apparel and not by being a drug addict…

Posted in:Amy Winehouse|Bikini

2009

24

Jun

Denise Richards in a Bikini Top with Birds of the Day

I know you probably still care about Denise Richards because you have a hard time letting go. You remember 10 years ago as being the glory day, because you were still in college and had your whole life ahead of you, your friends were always down to party, and this bitch was your celebrity fantasy, but that all went sour when you realized that you had to take a shitty job to pay your student loan, one you can’t stomach going to and everyday you feel like part of you dies a little, but for some reason you can’t leave because you can’t find anything better, you married the chick from the bar you used to fuck because you realized that you had no other real option and that she was probably the best you could do for yourself, even though everyday you tell her you love her, you’re lying and know that you can’t stand her and the fact that she’s tricked you into this fuckin’ life you live, but at least you always have Denise Richards fantasies to get you off, until pricks like me come along and show you that life hasn’t been all too friendly to her either giving you some comfort in other people’s misery, but really just taking away the last good thing you have from your youth.

Here she is in a bikini top and shorts cuz she hates her ass and rockin’ some kind of parrot like she’s a pirate because I guess in her scam of a career, she kinda is one.

Posted in:Bikini|Denise Richards

2009

24

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

I just got back from an open bar party and I took full advantage of it. The interesting thing was that the event was 99 percent chicks and I felt like I was creeping in the closet at a slumber party and every chick we spoke to asked us why the hell we were there, after they gave us handjobs, and by handjobs I mean dirty looks.

Here are my links, fuck yourself.

ecause The Porno Theatre Has Loads of Weird Dudes, and No Sitting At Home Being a Weird Dude Alone is Alot Better
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Are Your Breasts Getting You Down
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And Now, The New iPhone
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5 Megan Fox Scenes No One Has Seen
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And Now, Some Arabic High Diving
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Jennifer Aniston is Courgar-iffic
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Sienna Miller Just Doesn’t Give a Shit
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Now THESE Are Album Covers!
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Confessions of a Tattoo Vixen
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Surprise! The Little Bitch Who Got the Stars Tattooed All Over Her Lied
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Strip Video of the Day
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EVEN THE GAYS HATE PARIS HILTON!
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I Never Thought Jennifer Aniston Would Make Me Want to Puke, and She Has Done It
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Cameron Diaz Flashed Her Ass On the Tonight Show
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Isabel Lucas Could Be Pretty Hot is She Did Herself Up
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If Shia LeBoufe is Fucking Megan Fox, Anything is Possible
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Orit Fox Has The Biggest Tits in Isreal
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Lily Allen WTF
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Jessica Alba Gallery
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Nikita Will Make You Crave Fruit
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Ever Heard the Term Whsiper Pants?
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Elizabitch Hasslecrack is Getting Sued
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Cute Blonde Shows It All Off
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Jess and Dara Get It On
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Lesbians Love Anal
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Ghost Drive the Arab Way
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Joanna Krupa Has a Potty
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Megan Fox Gallery
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Anastasia is Cosy On a Rug
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Shower Time!
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Bikini Marketing 101
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Liza Doesn’t Like Underwear
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Sarah Jean Underwood is a Playboy Babe
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John Mayer Hates Perez Hilton, So Maybe JOhn Mayer Isn’t So Bad Afterall
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Russel Simmons is Always Banging Hot Chicks
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Hey!!! Wanna See My Penis?
YOU DON’T HAVE A CHOICE!!!
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

23

Jun

This Perez Getting Punched Shit is So Retarded of the Day

I am glad Perez got punched because it led to me being on a big radio show. I am not glad that he got punched because he didn’t get killed and that means we have to listen to him cry about him and people talk about him and the whole thing is so insignificant.

I saw him acting erratic that night while Will.I.Am stayed cool the entire time and I truly feel that if someone says something offensive while getting their ugly face up into the wrong person, it’s easy to get knocked the fuck out…

I am not saying that punching someone in the face is the way I deal with shit, but I have been punched many times because I have got in the wrong person’s face, and I’ve offended that wrong person, and people sometimes have a tendency to get physical when angry, whether it is illegal or not.

I was bitch slapped fuckin’ hard 2 weeks ago for pretty much runnin’ my mouth off to some racist dude. It happens to me almost everytime I get drunk, because I am abrasive and people don’t like my jokes. I don’t press charges. I take it like a man and go home and cry about how much a failure I am cuz no one gets me.

Perez is being an unstable baby about things. He is crying and wasting Canadian tax payer’s money by pressing charges while real emergencies are going on and people are getting killed, wives beaten, kids molested, kiddie porn traded, gang wars, rape and prostitution rings created and that’s just at my apartment block, when it was really not a big deal and the only real big deal about all this is that he never got hit before, considering he is such a hateful fuckin’ rodent of a bitter person.

There is no reason that Will.I.Am or any celebrity should be talking to the annoying clown no matter how powerful his site is, he is not a real celebrity, he’s just a leech and no matter how many readers he has or how much money he makes, he’s just a fuckin’ clown, and this whole thing is gayer than Perez, I don’t like that I wrote about it again, but this picture is hysterical and I had no choice…

Here’s a video of a preacher getting punched…

Posted in:Perez Hilton|Punched

2009

23

Jun

More Katie Price Breast Lift of the Day

Not sure what’s going on here but I assume Katie Price is doing her breast exercises, you know the ones the plastic surgeon prescribes you after you get your tits jacked the fuck up, so that your shit doesn’t get hard and awkward lookin, forcing you to massage them daily, to soften the silicone, the prescription that strippers love, because they are lettin’ dudes grab their tits for 10 dollars a song anyway, so now there’s an actual rationale behind their mild cockteasing prostitution, but when you’re in the process of filing for divorce after married to a gay dude, you are forced to do that shit yourself, and when you’re an exhibitionist slut, you do it out in public by the pool.

Point of the story is that her body is fuckin’ weird….but I’m still lookin’ at it….

Bonus – here she is on a party boat with Euros….

Posted in:Bikini|Katie Price

2009

23

Jun

Denise Richards Bikini Pictures of the Day

I read something about Denise Richards having downsized her tits because her D-Cups were too ridiculous for her size 0 frame, but the sad thing that she didn’t realize was that her D-Cups were the only reason she was getting work, so killin off her tits, was directly responsible for killin’ off her career, but the good news for her is that she can ride off of Charlie Sheen’s money, that’s what getting knocked up by a rich dude is all about at least that is what this gay dude who wanted to get me pregnant told me, but I knew he was up to something cuz I don’t have a uterus.

Posted in:Bikini|Denise Richards

2009

23

Jun

Lookin Up Jennifer Aniston’s Skirt of the Day

I just spend 5 minutes zooming in and out of this Jennifer Aniston upskirt pictures like some kind of virgin, not because I am a virgin but because I have a lot of fuckin’ time on my hands. In a lot of ways I am like a retired man, you know taking naps off and on all day, watching Soap Operas at McDonalds, but in reality I am just unemployed, unlike Aniston, who is seen here working, which is really all she has going for her, since no man she goes for will date her, impregnate her, or marry her.

The reason isn’t so much that dude’s won’t settle with her, it’s that she has too high standards and needs to take it down a notch. We get it, you scored Brad Pitt and got him to marry you in your glory days, well he left you and maybe it’s time to stop lookin for someone better than him because at this point it is not going to happen. He is Brad Fuckin’ Pitt….and you’re a bunch of years older and a lot more irrelevant….

Sitting at home, or in your trialer on set, obsessing over him, hoping things turn around and he realizes he made a mistake and was actually in love with her, is just wishful thinking. Just because the good times and memories they had together were the happiest times of your life, doesn’t mean they were his, and this whole Angelina shit is not just a phase, he got her knocked up and maybe you were the phase, despite thinkin he’s your family, your soulmate, your everything…..you’re going to die the fuck alone….because it’s over and time to move on….

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston|Skirt