I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

17

Jun

Video that Sucks of the Day

This video sucks because it isn’t funny. It is supposed to be a parody on some Japanese commercial that I haven’t seen and that I don’t care to see because I don’t live in Japan and don’t need to buy Japanese products making their commercials pretty much obsolete to me, no matter how funny they are.

This video also sucks because the company who produced it claims to be “Comedy that is Funny”. I like think we are smart enough to come to our own conclusions as to what is funny and what isn’t funny and just because you say you are funny, doesn’t mean you are funny. Like that ugly chick who I had beef with last weekend who thought she was hot. It’s one of those you can’t full me motherfucker, situations.

This video sucks because the joke is putting a wig in a bikini bottom and that is some frat boy “Oh my god she has huge bush, look at her try to get rid of her hug bush with the chainsaw and other household appliances cuz her bush is so fucking big”, shit and I don’t appreciate it.

The only think that doesn’t suck about this commercial parody from the people that put funny back into comedy is that there’s a bitch in a bikini and usually that’s good enough for me.

Posted in:Video that Sucks

2008

17

Jun

Katy Perry Performing on Carson Daly of the Day(ly)

Sure she sucks at singing and the highlight of her career is that everyone wants to fuck her, and the highlight of her career up until now has been the fact that she convinced some pervert executive to sign her and give her a chance to live her dream because she gives great head, but that is nothing compared to this glorious moment of performing live on the Carson Daly show, I hear it is the most coveted slot to be on in TV. Sure it doesn’t have an audience or a good time slot like those other late night shows, and sure the host is a fucking loser and not a comedian, but it is the closest thing to the time you played make belief “TV Reporter” with your cousin as kids in front of an audience of stuffed animals, only this doesn’t end in sex offending, it just ends in tarnished careers, but when you don’t deserve a career to being with – it’s all good.

Posted in:Katy Perry|Performs

2008

16

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

Today is a struggle, I am hungover and adjusting to being somewhere that isn’t my shitty couch in my shitty apartment and by adjusting I mean trying to bang as many bitches as possible because I left my disgusting wife at home. One of the bitches I am not going to be getting with is this one who just emailed me:

u are so hot but im only 12

I had nothing to respond so instead here are my links:

Britney’s Favorite Porno
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Bikini Super Market
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More Gameshow Fun from the Far East
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Nikki Sanderson Looks Oh So Good
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Adriana Lima is Engaged and It’s Only a Matter of Time Before She Ruins Her Vagina With a Baby
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Kim Kardashian Panty Upskirt
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Hayden Like an Old Truck or Fridge – Keeps Getting Older and Less Significant
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Find Out a Girls Name After You Slept With Her, In Case You’re a Drunk Like Me And Forget Shit Like That
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Tali Jatali Has a Horrible Accent But Is Fully Hot, So It’s Forgiveable
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Roselyn Sanchez Gallery
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Amazing Compilation of Some Crazy Basketball Shots
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The Top 10 Hottest Videos of Chicks Using Guns
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Jordan’s Sister Sophie Price’s First Strip of the Day
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Some Tila Tequila Shoot for King Magazine that You’ll Want to Fuck
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Darth Thriller Video
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Wet T-Shirt Goodness
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Car-Ma-Sutra : The Top 10 Sexual Positions in your Car
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Two Fat Guys Fight in Tight Pants Video
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8 Popular Sex Toys for Men
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Some Dude on Drugs Rock’s Out Proper
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Some Wrestling Diva Milf Flashing Her Ass and Showing Off her Big Fake Gross Tits
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Jamie Bradford is Cute in Plaid, and By Cute I Mean Fuckable
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More Mischa Barton Mushy Thighs
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Hot Underwear Ad You’ve Probably Already Seen….
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Kanye West Manages to Piss Off an Entire Festival’s Worth of People,
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American Apparel Ad With Tits
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American Apparel is Selling Sex Toys Now….
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Watch GIrls in your Neighborhood Get on Cam So You Can Get Off or Take them On a Date
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Samantha Fox Rocking The Cameltoe
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Top 7 Ass Getting Hollywood Assholes
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The Top 50 Most Lovely Cheerleading Squads
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Denise Richards Bikini Throwback
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Wet T-Shirt Contest Backstage
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I Usually Enjoy Watching Skaters Fall, But This is Pretty Awesome
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The Mid-Life Crisis Tour 2008
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Lesbian Butthole Lovers
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Rhianna Looks Hot at the Music Music Video Awards
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Ron Jeremy Never Ceases to Amaze Me
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A Collection of Nude Beach Shots
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Winehouse is Steadily on the Road to Recovery; Shows Up Only 2 Hours Late for Show
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Katherine is Sexy in a Fishnet
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Hyacinth’s Photoshoot Video
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The Ass Polka
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The Best Porn On The Net According To A Fat Guy (Me)
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Girlie Caught Masturbating
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Creepy Dutch Dude Gets Close to the Childrens
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Some Car Crash From the Inside Video
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Harvey Price Has a Message For Us
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Kate Beckinsale Hates Her, Which is Odd Because I Think It Is Glorious
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Tila Tequila Needs to Have Her Fucking Head Examined
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Uhhhh…Rock On…I Think?
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Who knew polka could be this fun!
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Living Lohan Episode 4
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Lori Loughlin is Back and More Bangable Then Ever
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The Oldest Lesbians in the History of Lesbians
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Miranda Kerr in a Victoria’s Secret Commercial
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Chaka Khan Dressed Like a Tire
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Prank Goes Gay
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Remember When Britney Spears Was Fuckable?
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Bierstick is Possibly the Greatest Invention Ever
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Spy Cam Catches Strippers Getting It On
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Keanu Reeves’ Chink in a Bikini
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Some Freaks Doing Weird Things to Themselves….
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Rogue Collector’s Photobucket Finds of the Day –

A Picture of Some Naked Chick and a Little Dick Suckin’
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Some Chubby Chick Gets Down To Her Naked Self in These Pictures
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BONUS –

Club Sluts From Montreal Sluts That Are a Hell of a Lot Better in Picture than in Person Because You Can’t Hear Their Annoying Voices…..
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PORN REVIEWS –

18 Eighteen is the Closest You Come to Doing Underage Girls Without Getting Arrested
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In Hornor of R.Kelly – Get into Sneaky Pee
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Her First Pregnancy
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Watch Squirting Carly Do What She Does…
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SUPPORT THE SITE BY CLICKING ON OUR SPONSORS WHO HAVE ALL THREATENED TO CANCEL THIS MONTH BECAUSE NO ONE IS CLICKING….WHICH MEANS THE END OF THIS BULLSHIT….

Use This to Get Sex, Because We All Need a Little Help Sometimes
And By We I Mean Losers Like You
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Relationships Made Easy
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Sluts You Know You Can Count On…..
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Start The Week Off Right. Get Laid
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Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

16

Jun

Katherine Heigl is a Pig in Her Bikini of the Day

I don’t know what the deal with Katherine Heigl is, she is a cunt and she’s not even attractive enough to justify being a cunt. She is however attractive enough to sell me hardware supplies because she’s built like she can carry fuckin’ lumber, but unfortunately she’s too much of a cunt to follow her destiny at the hardware store and managed to work her way into lives of people everywhere through our TVs because TVs are like our family members who don’t get drunk and naked at parties like our other family memebers. Either way, last week this Heigl bitch turned down applying to be nominated for an Emmy, because she knew she wouldn’t get nominated and didn’t want that stain on her career.

It’s a lot like these whores a dude I know tried to hire the other night. He was determined to get a lesbian show and had no interest on fucking the girls or letting the girls fuck him because he just wanted to show his friends a good time. He has a lot more money than any of my other friends, so he calls up these whores from some agency and they come over. When they walk in the door, they see a group of perverts standing around and get fuckin’ stage fright or someshit. They ask the dude paying what he wants them to do, and he tells them he wants a lesbian show. One of them panics and asks if anyone in the room wants full service when they are done the lesbian show and dude says that he just wants the lesbian show. The other one freaks out saying she doesn’t do lesbian shows and my friend asks what the difference between fucking multiple strangers all night and licking your friend’s pussy is and she just said she was on the rag and ran out of the apartment. You know every

Posted in:Bikini|Katherine Heigl|Pig

2008

16

Jun

Fergie Takes a Jog of the Day

Fergie is known for being fit and having a tight body, a body so ripped it looks like it may have a pair of little steroid testicles tucked between her legs. I was actually convinced I met Fergie last night at a bar until I realized that I was actually talking to some dude who happened to be a mixed martial arts fighter and went on about how badly he likes breaking bones, while wearing some kind of faggy cut off shirt showing off her “pythons”.

* Access to material has been disabled in compliance with DMCA *

Posted in:Fergie|Jog

2008

16

Jun

Alex Curran is Rockin’ a Bikini Again of the Day

I don’t know who this clubslut who landed a soccer player is, but I have posted on her and her sloppy body in the past and I figure I should do it again, because she is still in her bikini, which isn’t a huge surprise considering all these soccer wives are always in their fucking bikinis as they spend their husbands money and drink their champagne and pump out babies because it makes for a better life than my life which isn’t saying much considering the dude with one-eye who works at my gas station where I buy chocolate milk has a better life than me.

I had a little altercation with a clubslut the other night. I was running my mouth off, teasing her about being Jewish and said that she gave me a blowjob in summer camp because I could tell she was a slut and would have to dig back into her archives of dicks she’s sucked. She was in her mid-30s and highly affected by the Sex in the City revolution and probably has been suckin dick or well over 20 years. really worked in her favor, except for the whole being alone while all her friends have families of their own and are at home breast feeding while she’s out railing lines off the toilet seat at shitty clubs or outside talking to the likes of me and taking home random man after random man until one of them is lonely enough to stick with her.

Anyway, she took offense to me teasing her for being a slut and asked me if I always rip on hot girls and what the fuck my hatred for hot chicks is all about and that is when I said that her theory would have a lot more bearing if she was actually a hot chick and I saw her little ego crumple before my eyes.

Her initial response was obviously to call me out for being fat and bitter and that she didn’t care about what I had to say because I was fat and I would never have a chance with her and my opinion was void, but the truth is that anyone can tell themselves that they are hot, but it doesn’t mean they are in fact hot and should be happy when someone is nice enough to tell them that they really don’t have it going on. It’s a lot better than the constant lies she falls for from various men who tell her she’s hot to get in her pants but don’t ever call her back once they are out of her pants, because the only thing hot abut her is that she’s drunk, has a vagina and is lookin’ for love.

In a lot of ways, I was just being a nice guy.

Posted in:Alex Curran|Alex Curran Bikini|Bikini

2008

16

Jun

Kim Kardashian’s Fat Ass in a Bikini of the Day

kim kardashian fat ass in a bikini

I feel a lot like Kim Kardashian today. I ate chinese food with a friends at 5 am last night and had fast food in the afternoon, I ate a bag of chips and about 12 beers throughout the day and this has been going on for a few months and I’ve lost buttons off all my pants, people refer to me as big guy more than they ever have, I have scars from where my jogging pant elastic waistband digs into my skin. My T-shirt barely works anymore more and exposes my backside when I sit, because there isn’t enough fabric to go around, and everyone can see my fat ass crack since I don’t wear underwear. It’s got to the point where mothers have come up to me and have asked me to pull up my pants because they find me inappropriate with the kids like I was R. Kelly.

Here is Kim Kardashian and her Junk Food Eating body up in her bikini again all because you like fat chicks.

Posted in:Bikini|Fat Ass|Kim Kardashian

2008

16

Jun

Denise Richards and Her Friends Rock the Stripper Pole of the Day

If you’re wondering why I am not posting – it’s for 2 reasons. The first is that I came to Toronto (a city in Canada) to try to crash the MMVA’s. They are some shitty half rate, Canadian award show that badly copies the VMAs, but I couldn’t get into the event, because they take themselves too seriously and they don’t take me seriously at all. The good news is that I did get drunk. and now I am hungover.

The other reason is that the dude who said I could stay with him, put me into some dusty fucking closet of a room with no windows and I have asthma and can’t breathe when I am in dust, and could have died, but lived and it turns out the internet he promised me sucks bigger dicks than the Perez Hilton party I sneaked into hoping to jump the motherfuckin’ smurf and his pink hair and not in a way he would like to be jumped because based on his look, I can only assume he longs to be touched by another living, breathing human, even if it is in bouts of rage.

Either way, What the fuck is this Denise Richards show Bullshit, I can’t believe that this garbage is on fuckin’ TV. When sluts like Denise Richards make claims that taking time out for herself and her friends to play around with sex toys and stripper poles really got her out of her rut, it makes me wonder where all her time is going since she looks like she’s a self absorbed cunt and considering she hasn’t had work in years, I feel like she has ample time for herself, I mean except of course for her little kids that have been a huge mistake because they aren’t just like dogs who you can put to sleep when you are done with them and you have to take time to make sure they are fed, washed, clothed and on time for ballet classes. Something that takes away from Denise Richards’ me time, which up until the kids was 100 percent of the time and is now about 99 percent of the time, since there are nannies on staff to handle them. Greedy, self righteous bullshit is offensive to me and shouldn’t be on TV.

I guess in all fairness, this whore needs to practice because based on the way she’s putting herself out there to look like a piece of fucking garbage, it’ll be a skill that comes in handy when shaking her old haggard ass on stage.

Here is Denise Richards Talking about her really busy schedule that sounds scripted to shit and the whole stripper pole party stemmed from her not finding the time to wax her fuckin’ bush and her cunt friend stepping in telling her to make time for herself. This show is embarrassing to watch.

Posted in:Denise Richards|Friends|Stripper Pole

2008

14

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

Comments Off on stepLINKS of the Day

So I was in the bathroom of the bar and walked into some kind of homoerotic charged scene, where a group of young immigrant dudes were pulling out their dicks and swinging them around while laughing like it was the funniest shit they ever saw. I had never really seen anything like that before, and assume it is some kind of cultural thing from wherever they are from like some kind of drunken 20 year old dude right of passage in a country I don’t ever want to visit. I pissed anyway, because I have seen weirder things in my life and I am pretty desensitized to everything, but it was still fuckin’ weird enough to throw me off and ask myself what I just witnessed. Here are my links, hopefully they have a similar effect.


Cybergirl of the Year Jo Garcia Gets Down With the Wii Fit and It’s Pretty Fucking Legendary
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Lohan and Her Box
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Pam Anderson’s Big Ol’ Tits Have Big Ol’ Hard Nipples
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Katy Perry’s Album Fuckin’ Sucks But If Bitch Had A Cock, She’d Be Worth Suckin Off Cuz She Looks That Good in This Gallery/Review
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I Have Never Seen Jennifer Aniston Looking So Fucking Smug in My Life
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Ingrid Coronado’s Bikini is Smiling for the Camera
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Increase Your Heart Rate with Susana Instead of PUlling It Like You Always Do
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Ashley Tisdale Doesn’t Have AIDS and I’m Guessing She is Pretty Happy About That
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Cortortion It’s Sluts in Swimsuits Aren’t So Bas Either
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A Little Collection of Madonna, Mariah Carey and Kylie Minogue
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Pam Anderson Gets Her Tits Grabbed By Tommy Lee
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Top 10 Hottest Bathtub Movie Scenes of All Time
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Best Golf Photo Ever
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Some Crazy Volvo Crash
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Help Me, Help You, Help ME
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Real Girls Gallery
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Josie Maran Enjoy the Scenery While You Enjoy Her
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And That’s Why You Don’t Give a Toddler a Bat
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R. Kelly Gets Away With Making Porn with 13 Year Olds
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Naomi Campbell Looks as Drunk as I Am
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A Gallery of Naughty Nurses
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This Bitch Has Nice Tits
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See How Pick Pockets Work
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Some Tila Tequila Gallery That You Will Probably Like Because She Look’s Like a Little Asian Kid Your Dad Raped and Killed in Nam but with Fake Tits, And You Are Into That
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Gloria Velez is a Pretty Good Way to End the Week
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Bikini Contest That Made My Swimsuit Area Tingle Just a Little
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Nicole Trunfio is Hot in Lingerie
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Hilary Duff, What the Fuck Are You Wearing?
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Fine Girls to Fuck and Give Your Teddy Bear a Night Off
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Sara Larson is Desperate
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Something That is Possibly Alove Just Fell Off Kate Moss’ Head
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Justine Timberlake is Well Hung At Least That’s What Some Tranny I Met Told Me…
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Striptease Collection of the Day
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No One is Interested in Mariah Carey’s Wedding
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Georgia Rubs Herself Down
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The Best Treadmill Accident Ever
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Hamburder Pussy is Nicer Than it Sounds
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The Perfect Ass
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Find The Best Porn on the Internet, Period
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Emmanuelle Chriqui Uses Blue Sharpie To Sign Autographs!
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Now That’s What I Call Progress
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Mena Suvari Bikini Thong Throwback
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Vicki Blows in Zoo Weekly
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Guess the Former Disney Stars Ass
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Monica Cruz is Penelope’s Younger Sluttier Looking Sister With a Less Offensive Nose and I Love Her
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Best Way to Serve a Drink
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Outdoor Spy Came That May Be Fake But Is Still Amazing
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Let’s Go Hawaiian!
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Throwback: Aries Spears Does Rap Impressions
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Jennifer Ellison is Hot
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Lindsay Strut is Topless
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You Weekend Just Got a Whole Lot More Exciting. You’re Welcome
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Jessica Simpson Has a New Gay
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Pussy Play on the Job
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Myspace Whore in Action
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These Tits are Invading London
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Pussy and a Bear
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PORN REVIEWS – Get It On at The Beach with Beach Erotica

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Playboy Chick Named Laura Croft’s Personal Pictures
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FROM THE NEWS

Naked Jogging Priest Found Guilty
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FROM PHOTOBUCKET

Some Hot Chick Named Sarah is Naked
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Some Asian Bikini Video
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Spend your Weekend With Someone Who Cares About Getting You Off
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BONUS – Club Sluts from Clubs They Don’t Let You Into
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Posted in:stepLINKS|Uncategorized

2008

13

Jun

Kim Kardashian’s Fat Bikini Ass of the Day

Kim Kardashian is a fucking beast of a girl who shouldn’t be out in a bikini, but should be at home on her treadmill because that is not a hot fat ass, it is just a fat ass. Sure her and her sister both have pretty curvy bodies and big hips but at least her sister doesn’t break chairs when she sits down.

The thing I love about these pictures is the animal print front of her bikini, not because her vagina is a wild animal that can’t be tamed, but because no matter how little clothing she has on and no matter how much money she has in the bank, she’s still a fuckin’ piece of trash, a really overweight piece of trash.

Bonus – Kim Kardashian Maintaining her Body By Eating Ice Cream Cuz She’s Fat and Likes Putting Things in Her Mouth

Another BONUS – Pictures of her Fat Ass Shopping Earlier in the Week

Posted in:Bikini|Fat Ass|Kim Kardashian