DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2021

29

Sep

Ana De Armas Nip Slip of the Day

We live in this weird fucking digital world where the celebrities of social media, or the girls of social media trying to be celebrities, are the primary content producers and they don’t really put all that much budget into what they do, they have filters for that, so we’re here looking at cartoon version of cartoon people, who have cartoon dreams, of being cartoon cuz their digital life is the ultimate…and they get paid…

So with all the filtered faces, Filtered eyes, acclimatized to jerking off to fake cartoon versions of women, which I am sure does weirdness on a psychological level….because when people people are so used to seeing fake shit, that they don’t know when real shit is jerking them off….via computer machines and internet….of THINGS…

If you don’t know what is real or what is fake, it is a confusing place…is everything an avatar and AI, or are some things real…

So I like to think it is nice to see a real celebrity, who may have been human trafficked from CUBA to America via Ben Affleck’s dick….at least that’s the story I like to run with but she was pretty famous before tainting herself with Ben Affleck’s dick…..and the point of this is that she was created by the industry and gifted to us in the movies the industry gives us, and I guess she could be AI..just a good CGI…but I’ll accept her as real instead of all these other thirsty fucking girls trying to get famous, or noticed, or whatever using their tits..while this one’s probably not even happy that her tits been slipped, because she’s modest and gets paid lots of money to show those hot tits in the movies…

Point of the story….NIP SLIP!!!!

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Posted in:Ana De Armas

2021

29

Sep

Workout Wednesday of the Day

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Workouts are critical…now more than ever since most of the deaths that are being seen from the COVID ward are people with high blood pressure, diabetes, and other obesity related shit…because as we’ve all been told our entire lives…I mean I was born in the 70s and even then they’d tell my handler I had 5-15 pounds to lose…which at 40 pounds was half my body weight in fat….50% full of fatness…probably worse now…

So if you’re into living and having a better quality of life…maybe into trying new outdoor sports like hiking, or rock climbing, or just staying healthy to fuck better, as if people fuck you, but maybe they would if you were more fit you slob….

If you’re like me and fine with being lazy, passive, a useless stain of streaming garbage content on the regular basis because real life is far less fulfilling than staring at a wall waiting to die….

Then you’ll be happy to know why these girls are doing it so you don’t have to…and that’s basically the only real value with the gym, or really any aspect of life…THE BITCHES!!

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Posted in:Workout

2021

29

Sep

Hilary Duff Bikini of the Day

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Hilary Duff creeps me the fuck out because she’s some weirdly sexual celebrity that you know has seen some pretty creepy shit in her career as a teen actor who at her peak was one of the biggest names in young adult entertainment…

As I look at her licking her cocktail like a drunk, wearing her bikini, despite being a mom of three with various men, as girls who use their vaginas frivolously typically do, since being rich, famous, coddled, well paid, a huge star doesn’t make a bitch immune to that shit….and the real question is how many of the pregnancies she’s had didn’t make it to completion…because if there are three that did…there were likely more that didn’t…I mean she’s been doing this a while…

I assume that Hilary Duff’s fanbase will like this, now that her tits are big, to offset those powerhouse thighs and really, if I wasn’t so creeped out by her story, the BEHIND THE SCENES of her story, I probably would be into that too….but this industry they are part of, and in her case, that she’s a huge player in…is fucking weird….BUT BIKINIS tend to diffuse that shit, take the heat off that shit…right.

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Posted in:Hilary Duff

2021

29

Sep

Olivia Culpo Bikini of the Day

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Miss Rhode Island USA winner who probably prefers to be called Miss USA or even more substantial Miss Universe 2012..but who is probably better known as that shameless instagram slut who posts provocative pictures along with her “fashionable” pictures to trick people into thinking she’s some kind of lifestyle brand and not some modern avon lady who pushes her empty souled followers to buy shit they don’t need, and may not even afford….ALL while being TOTALLY uninteresting, uninspiring, in her curated bullshit designed to push product, so that the NFL players she fucks, and there have been a bunch of them, don’t realize she’s just a status chasing clout chasing wallet fucking twat who really believes her own bullshit hype…try hard fuck.

The good news is that at 29, she hasn’t got knocked up by one of her football wallets she fucks yet, but she will…and before she does…take in her relatively hot bikini body, which is almost meaningless since there’s endless hot bikini bodies on the internet…but is still something…MORE bikini pics for a mindless society.

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Posted in:Olivia Culpo

2021

29

Sep

Pussy Wedgie Wednesday of the Day

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Pussy Definition is pretty exciting to me, because I am a huge lover of vagina, I think that’s the real “born that way” they try to pretend is an excuse for gay shit, when we all know gay shit comes from weirdo perverts who have been confused along the way…I mean I know gay people and totally respect them for fucking dudes cuz they find dudes hot even though they aren’t chicks who are actually hot…and I am convinced that every gay dude I’ve ever met could EASILY go straight…when realizing how much better vaginal sex is than anal sex, I mean it was built for your dick, the asshole is the back-up plan and full of shit…

So yeah, the idea of girls walking around with their pussy’s on blast, you know letting everyone see your pussy as you walk along doing your errands, which for someone who didn’t get to see pussy every time I leave the house, it’s pretty great advancement of our society…I mean I used to beg and it’d be pretty pathetic to get a girl to show me her pussy…NOT ANYMORE…I mean just yesterday I saw a professions, maybe a doctor, lawyer, accountant…walking out of her office building in leggigns…FULL cunt out…I mean I’d NEVER see her cunt in my life, those professional types don’t fuck with my kind, yet here I am with front row seats to her pussy like one of her meaningless sex partners she has eat her out on weekends….a gift…..

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Posted in:Pussy Wedgie

2021

29

Sep

Kourtney Kardashian Pussy of the Day

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Kourtney Kardashian has been pretty present on the internet because her and Travis Barker have embarked on some end of life campaign, or at least end of her potential sex appeal life campaign, because there are still people who have wrongfully decided or believe in the lie that Kourtney Kardashian is the hot Kardashian, despite being a fucking troll, demon contributing to destroying society as we know it by brainwashing the weak girls of social media…..

I don’t blame those of you out there who were like “She’s the hot Kardashian”….it’s human nature to be given 3 chicks and choosing the best of the 3 chicks….even if none of them are all that good…it’s one of those “the tv makes us see these people all the fucking time even though they have no marketable skills, there’s gotta be some kind of scam in this, but that’s too much for my simple mind to debate, I’ll just fixate on the hot one, even if she’s not the hottest, she’s hotter than the other two freakshows”…..

I always tell the story I contemplated my sexuality as a young and easily influenced immigrant kid at a new school when I was 12 or 13 and not really into girls in a “I want to fuck” kind of way…I was more into girls who were nice, or pretty, but not for animalistic reasons….I only hit puberty at 25 and even then my penis never grew…

But yeah…the “cool guys” were obsessed with a girl who looked like a burn victim, and I thought that was really fucking weird, but they were all obsessed and pretty convincing and my half retard self was like “but she looks like a burn victim, if that’s what dudes are into, well, maybe I’m a queer”….only to realize, they were just brain washed idiots perpetuating lies…like anyone into these EVIL Kardashians…

So yeah, the old as shit, plastic surgery ridden, filtered botch job of a monster who’s family have a deal with the devil himself, is running around the world with Travis Barker being perverted and horny, and the whole thing is stomach curdling…because they are both equally disgusting looking people…but not as curdling as her mom pussy eating her weird one piece she shouldn’t be in because her mom body’s freakish…but here it is….you perverts who like anyone who is in a one piece…which I’ll admit is challenging for me because these on piece things are hot…..especially when the pussy tries eating them up….it’s a fetish…just the wrong girl partaking…

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Posted in:Kourtney Kardashian

2021

29

Sep

Isabella Fonte Ass of the Day

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Isabella Fonte Hot Young Thing…is one of those TikTok sensations who probably deserves to be a TikTok sensation rather than the other pigs that they are packaging as TikTok sensations by throwing money and Kardashians looking for clout at them…because TikTok was a “dance” app for the perverts to watch girls dance…before migrating into the comedy and truther platform it seems to be now…all designed by the Chinese AI experts who know how to show you shit that they want you to see, or what you want to see, to keep you distracted and indoctrinated…you know TECH is so COOL for THAT….

But yeah, it was a dance app and this hot girl with her hot dance body is a professionally trained dancer and not some randomw awkward bitch badly dancing….which is fucking important.

I realize that talent isn’t celebrated, digital marketing is, and that social media has basically allowed for a lot of HACKS to have a voice, a platform, a way to monetize without any marketable skill….but why would our society celebrate people with skills, that’d be CRAZY, when we can just keep things vapid and meaningless..

POINT of the story is, Fonte, a rich kid in her 20s, has that flexibility, that dancer body, that athleticis, that rhythm thanks to that connection to her body, and all those things would likely make her a great fuck, which I guess is what it all comes down to…staring at girls who would never fuck us as they remind us how good they’d be at fucking, provided they weren’t the hot girl who just lays there and takes it because she knows she’s doing you a favor type…

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Posted in:Isabella Fonte

2021

29

Sep

Weed Wednesday of the Day

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Weed is one of those things that I’ve realized in recent years is a gift from God, or a gift of nature which in turn is a gift from God, and that’s precisely why it’s been banned, censored, deleted, alienated….because they can’t have a gift from God available to his people to either help you sleep, help you focus, help you relax, help you through depression or anxiety…maybe it helps you reach that higher level of consciousness…I don’t know, but it’s grown in the garden, not processed, and from the earth…so HOW COULD IT BE BAD…

I know that people argue that it’s the devil’s lettuce, but that’s precisely what the devil would want you to think to keep your from using it…and then you think “well why is the Canadian Government legalizing it”….some conspiracy people think it is to keep people dumb, you know lazy on netflix…the tools to keep you retarded…because EMF and programming through pop culture and social isn’t enough…give them something to really medicate them especially if they aren’t the kind of person on all those anti-depressants, which is the minority and likely where a lot of our problems as a society started…MEDICATE EVERYONE.

I would argue that they may have been trying to medicate and retard the population, but it was likely just to tax something they couldn’t control, since they love fucking tax….

But I know nothing about anything, I just think weed’s the weakest high, has great benefits medically and industrially and it’s too easy to produce that they hate it….but not so much if they can tax it….

These are some weed activists, fighting for their right to weed, or they love of weed through smut…the way all activism SHOULD be….

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Posted in:Weed

2021

29

Sep

Gwyneth Paltrow Naked in The Tub of the Day

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Gwyneth Paltrow in tub is hilariously seen as “big news”. because she’s celebrating her 59th birthday or some shit because she’s a fucking dinosaur…but also a narcissist who get celebrated and goes viral for being a degenerate rich person who does fancy shit because you can’t….and like a cult, she’s got all these women who buy into everything she pushes on them…from steaming their vaginas, to vagina scented candles, to vibrators because masturbation is self care people, it’s great for your skin…just stay home masturbating motherfuckers….

So yeah, despite being a senior citizen, the entitled rich kid who has had everything in her life handed to her, her parents were famous and she was born into it…which is fine, I am not against the lucky sperm club, I just find the lucky sperm club annoying when they push their bullshit on regular women who don’t have the same resources…because it’s ok for some rich and famous cunt to be a cunt, but when middle of the road start acting like one, it gets annoying..

Now, if she was really sex positive, or BIRTHDAY SUIT serious, she’d be making this post a labia empowerment post, because not seeing her old lady labia like we were Brad Pitt when he dated her or that guy from COLDPLAY who had a kid with her named APPLE….is the real crime in this…

This is the kind of “Nude selfie” you return to fucking sender when you’re trying to get off….and someone in the business of vibrators should know better….

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Posted in:Gwenyth Paltrow

2021

29

Sep

Alyssa Milano Bra of the Day

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My claim to fame, or my peak moment in doing this site was not when Alyssa Milano told me off on twitter before blocking me, after a multi-year campaign making fun of her hairy arms that she’s since got waxed or lasered because clearly she knew I was right to say “woah, maybe someone’s a little TOO italian”….

I would say my claim to fame, or peak moment in doing this, from a celebrity perspective at least, was calling Jake Gyllenhaal a faggot…because he is one…but that was only a peak because Disney lawyers came after me and it was pretty fucking funny at the time because I got to see how these scammers scam…but this isn’t about me…

This is about a 50 year old expired celebrity that no one gave a fuck about before she became an annoying activist of Twitter, like the uneducated retard pushing her filth that she is, I mean thanks social media for not leaving a cunt on the set of WHO’S THE BOSS where she belongs…TONY DANZA.

Yes, I know she was on Charmed with Rose McGowan’s tits…but as far as I’m concerned, that’s pretty much leaving her on WHO’S THE BOSS because anyone who watched Charmed is not human…

I never found her hot, even at her peak on WHO’S THE BOSS, she was a crooked faced tom boy…not really my thing…

She’s a misguided idiot, but being her proud feminist showing off her tits, since they really are all she’s got going for her….especially at this age…so let’s celebrate a woman who knows her worth…cuz even those most worthless scumbag matters when they have tits.

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Posted in:Alyssa Milano