Why the fuck didn’t I know there was a national cleavage day for some bullshit charity….that can’t be all that bullshit if it involves bitches playing with their tits with the excitement you’d expect from a child on Christmas day opening that toy they always wanted only to find it under the Christmas Tree…that for some reason never happened cuz no one loved you…if you know what I mean…

She’s 18. American. On the rise and is going to take the fuck over. Already so eager to use her body for profit, only good things are going to come of this……

Posted in:Kate Upton

Kate Upton does twitter proper. This is exactly what the shit is for….to expose yourself and your inner feelings while perverts who follow you jerk off to you…it’s like the way for a model who normally doesn’t engage with her audience, to really show off her intelligence, and by intelligence I mean drunk teen tits….

You see Kate Upton is 18….She’s been a model since she was 15.

She’s already langed Victoria’s Secret as a gig. She doesn’t mind showing off her tit…that may be the greatest tits available in America, cuz Victoria’s Secret scope this shit out….and she’s only 18…it must be the hormones in the food….and looking at her is almost perverted…which is why you are masturbating right now, aren’t you…I feel kinda gay going down this road and sharing this moment together….

Seriously…this is ridiculous on all fronts…here she is living it up….until the good life takes over or like all busty 18 year olds-puberty sets in and she turns fat…looking back from her trailer park in 10 years remembering the glory days…happy they happened….and so am I.

Nice tits. 18.

Posted in:Kate Upton

Here’s Kate Upton in some pajama pants….

I usually hate when girls wear pajamas…It’s one of those “Please sleep naked, pajamas make me feel like I’m in bet with a 10 year old at a slumber party, cuz there’s nothing hot about ill fitting pajamas, unless you like 10 year olds at a slumber party, which I don’t, but prefer you naked up on me, whether you are cold or not”…it just feels better, is easier to stick it in, and is almost natural, you know who needs bulky shit getting between us…kinda of thing…

That was until today….Kate Upton…Bikini Model..Is amazing…

Posted in:Kate Upton

Kate Upton is some SI model who doesn’t only work for SI because apparenltly doesn’t do the whole Victoria’s Secret kidnap a bitch from her family in some foreign country in exchange for an exclusive modeling contract until the world finds out you were born with a dick – and they fire you cuz they don’t want their brand associated with cross dressers and trannies – this is America, the heartland of Christian faith…or some shit…

Apparently, she also works for Guess like she was Anna Nicole Smith, only less fat and dead. Apparently, they use her skills well cuz apparently shes got a great body…..No April’s fool joke in that….cuz this site is a year long April Fool’s joke…and so is my life….FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Kate Upton

Here’s Kate Upton showing off how to use twitter by posting her half naked swimsuit model body half naked….

You see, I suck at twitter because I don’t have a pussy. I don’t post half naked pictures.

I am not on TV. I am not in the movies. I don’t have famous friends. I don’t have famous followers. I don’t have a youtube hit. I am not a viral sensation. I am not funny.

More importantly. I don’t have a pussy and I don’t post half naked pictures of myself..cuz really that’s all it takes….Kate Upton gets how it works. FOLLOW ME

Posted in:Kate Upton