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Archive for the Nude Category

2008

11

Jun

Throwback Carmen Elecrta Nude in Some Photoshoot of the Day

I am tired of posting recent shit becaue the world has gone to shit and I am more interested in a simplier time, so this is Carmen Electra in some unknown photoshoot from a long time ago, spreading her legs and showing us her tits, both things that we’ve seen before and are happy to see again.

I guess you could say that she is nothing but a one-trick pony, except she will never turn tricks for you or ride you like a pony, you sick beastiality fuck, despite what your imagination that you believe is reality because you are insane and don’t get away from the computer might tell you.

On a happier note, the sheet she has between her legs gets a lot more pussy than you, but not a lot more pussy than the soiled piece of fabric I use as a sheet, but that’s got nothing to do with my skills in seducing ladies and more to do with my wife’s skill of having the biggest, stickiest vagina out of any girl I’ve met and manages to get that sheet up between the crevaces of her lips on the daily.

Eithery way, I heard this sheet for is available on e-bay and that may be the closest you ever get to her vagina, or any vagina at all so you should considering busting open that piggy bank and spending your vacation fund on it, but it may not be worth it considering how Comicon has always been a dream of yours.

Speaking of vaginas, i have a box of rubber ones sitting in my fridge that i found in some alley behind a sex shop that went bankrupt. I don’t really know what I was doing there or if the whole thing was a mirage (because the only water i drink is out of puddles) and but there is a box rubber vaginas sitting in my fridge because I like to keep the fresh and since i already adopted one because my wife’s is dead and I like to practice eating out pussy, the others are looking for love and homes too, so I am planning on giving them away with no guarantee that they have never been used and that they won’t give you aids, a guarantee that also comes with Carmen Electra’s pussy.

Posted in:Carmen Electra|Nude|Photoshoot

2008

20

Feb

Lindsay Lohan Nude Photoshoot Outtakes of the Day

So all you motherfuckers got all excited about seeing Lohan topless or nude despite being covered in freckles in the Lindsay Lohan Nude Photoshoot for NY Mag. I didn’t really give a fuck about them either way, because a staged photoshoot with tits is boring, no matter who the tits belong too. I want to see vagina with dick in it from a picture taken by a paparazzi in a closet, none of this airbrushed studio bullshit…. I did ask a plastic surgeon if her tits were real and he said they were real…implants. I also spoke to a dude who goes to her coke parties and he said she was always naked and advertised the fact that her tits were great fakes. I am going to say shit looks real to me…real fantastic and all you virgins are too busy jerking off to agree.

Either way, the fuckers at NY Mag who threatened me with a law suit yesterday are milking this story as hard as the cocks they like having shoved in their fashionable pretentious lawsuit threatening asses and released these out takes that look the same as the last batch….kinda like a Lohan herpes outbreak, the sores always hit the same spot and lacks excitement because you already know what to expect.

Either way, let’s hope bitch will take Marilyn Monroe’s lead and let this be her last photoshoot before having an overdose on barbiturates leaving her a hollywood legend that we can all look back upon and remember how hollywood turned her into a spoiled talentless cokewhore who was addicted to sex but never released a sex tape but always made us feel better about our miserable lives 20 years from now….

Related Posts:

The Cease and Desist Email I GOt From NY MAG Gayness
Lohan’s Tit in Her Nude Photoshoot for NY MAG
Old Lohan Pussy Flash
Lindsay Lohan’s Other Vagina Flash

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Nude|NYMag.com|Photoshoot|Topless

2008

19

Feb

Zoo Girls are Nude and Rude of the Day

Zoo Weekly consistently brings the goods when it comes to slutty Glamour models undressed or dressed half naked. They pretty destroy the American competition because they actually show some fuckin’ tit.

I guess you’re not really the home of the free, when your corporations are so fucking conservative that they won’t sponsor anything with a tit on it, even though those executives pay strippers ten dollars a dance to touch their tits pretty much every time they go away on business.

That’s not even going into the creepy shit those powerful executives do with their wives and their mistresses behind closed doors while always maintaining a clean cut image to make the psycho Christians and uptight WASPS buy their shit, because having an ad next to a picture of a tit or showing a little more tit on network TV would be so fucking bad, considering we all fuck and like fucking.

What I don’t understand is why CSI is on every night, showing people murdered and how they were murdered, with all kinds of dead bodies and blood and shit, but the second someone shows a little ass the FCC is on their ass with a million dollar fine.

It is really fucking crazy, but the good thing is that the UK give dudes what they want without labeling it porn, because let’s face it, we all like tits, except for the gay dudes, but they have Men’s Health to get them through their lonely nights that are a lot less lonely than your lonely nights, because gays like to fuck as much as you like to fuck, so they always find cock all while you’re out trying to convince a girl to get with you on Facebook…..maybe you should re-evaluate your lifestyle.

If you decided you still like tits then check out the 30 Pictures of Zoo Girls Nude and Rude
GO

Posted in:Nude|Zoo Weekly

2008

18

Feb

Lohan Topless in Some Photoshoot of the Day

These pictures of Lohan in some photoshoot for New York magazine recreating some Marilyn Monroe shoot were just sent to me and she’s topless. Now everyone who reads this site know I have a fake crush on coke whore and her tits are pretty much the main reason why. It’s definitely got nothing to do with her freckled skin that is cute when she it on a kid running a lemonade stand and not so cute when it looks like the coke whore just did some scat porn to get more coke and hasn’t had enough time to shower.

I don’t know what I am talking about, I’m riding off a 3 day hangover. Look at the pics because the best way to draw attention to your useless drug addicted self is to get naked. Remember that girls and be sure to start by sending them to me first.

I know having a sheet between you and lohan seems pretty shitty in pictures because it’s blocking out her pussy, but if this was real life that sheet is a necessity but preferably in latex because skin to skin contact with this whore has some serious repercussions , it’s kinda like wearing a helmet when riding a bike or when retarded so you don’t smash your head in the wall repeatedly.

I had to Take the Pics Down So Check them Out Here – but Put Them Back Up – Fuck ‘Em…
GO

Here’s My Email Communication with NY Mag
GO

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Naked|Nude|Photoshoot|Topless

2007

23

Aug

I am – Jade Jagger Nude Beach Pictures of the Day

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

I once wrote that I loved this bitch, I am not sure why, because she’s in her late 30’s and that’s not usually my style, I like younger fresher meat, but she’s the daughter of Mick and Bianca Jagger and I guess she’s normally hot and has a lot of money, just not so hot when naked on the beach.

I think the funniest thing about this shit is that it reminds me of my life. For some reason whenever I used to convince a drunk girl to get naked for me, or flash me her tits or shows me her box, I always miss it the first time around, like I wasn’t ready for it and when I ask them to do it again they always just think I am some pervert trying to get a second peak even when I am paying them…I remember hooking up an hour with a frigid whore, I didn’t really think shit was possible but bitch would let you bang her but she wanted the lights off, she wanted to do it missionary and she refused to do much more than lie there like you were fucking a scared virgin, only she was a hooker and her pussy wasn’t built like a virgin, it was purchased bad sex and I guess she catered to guys who liked to pretend they were getting with the 50 year old Jewish or Italian wife who never goes down on them, I figure it was either for guys who were still living in their mom’s basement or for husbands who were married to nymph’s and just wanted to feel like their friends for a change…

Either way, this photographer got a naked bitch on the beach, but didn’t get one bit of tit or ass or fuckin’ pussy. I don’t know how that can happen when shit’s not staged because these pictures remind me of every PG movie nude scene and it’s kinda making me mad…


Related Posts:
Jade Jagger Almost Has an Upskirt
James Jagger Turns 18
Lisa Marie and Jeff Goldblum on the Beach Naked

Posted in:Ass|Jade Jagger|Naked|Naturist|Nude|Nude Beach|Nudist|Pussy|Tits|Unsorted