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People always ask me why I post MUNG’s posts. I really don’t have an answer for this – I just do it. I don’t even read what he writes, and this is an example of my horrible editorial decisions….

Hey everybody! My name is Bill Maher and I am the world’s largest bag of douche. I am a bag of vaginal discharge that has been cleaned out by using a turkey baster filled with vinegar and water. I used to have a television show but it got taken off the air because I said politically incorrect things about the president of the United States of America. Now I have to get attention by making fun of dead people’s tragic mishaps and disrespecting an entire nation of decent Australian people because my career is fucking dead. Please shit on me and throw hot tar on my face because I suck donkey dick on stage to pay for my heroin habit. I also fuck little leppar Somalian children in the ass while I let 90 year old grandmothers fellate me. Once again, I ask of you to defecate on me and if you feel the need to, please pull this fake barb out of my chest and jab it repeatedly into both of my eyes.

FUCK YOU BILL MAHER YOU DISRESPECTFUL PIECE OF AMERICAN SHIT!

P.S. American Pie guy dressed as a Pizza…your costume sucks more than your career

Love,

MUNG

And now more Mariah pics….

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People always ask me why I post MUNG’s posts. I really don’t have an answer for this – I just do it. I don’t even read what he writes, and this is an example of my horrible editorial decisions….

Hey everybody! My name is Bill Maher and I am the world’s largest bag of douche. I am a bag of vaginal discharge that has been cleaned out by using a turkey baster filled with vinegar and water. I used to have a television show but it got taken off the air because I said politically incorrect things about the president of the United States of America. Now I have to get attention by making fun of dead people’s tragic mishaps and disrespecting an entire nation of decent Australian people because my career is fucking dead. Please shit on me and throw hot tar on my face because I suck donkey dick on stage to pay for my heroin habit. I also fuck little leppar Somalian children in the ass while I let 90 year old grandmothers fellate me. Once again, I ask of you to defecate on me and if you feel the need to, please pull this fake barb out of my chest and jab it repeatedly into both of my eyes.

FUCK YOU BILL MAHER YOU DISRESPECTFUL PIECE OF AMERICAN SHIT!

P.S. American Pie guy dressed as a Pizza…your costume sucks more than your career

Love,

MUNG

And now more Mariah pics….

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I just got back from a Jewish halloween party. I know, I thought it was Halloween for Jews everyday, you know with their beards, curly sideburns and amish lookin’ outfits, but I was wrong. I got to this bar and it wasn’t a mitzvah and I was surrounded by 20 year old Jews dressed like idiots. There was only one or two girls slutted out and the hottest girl in the place wasn’t even Jewish but she could do the Jane Fonda. Either way, there were more Jews than a German concentration camp back in the ’40s. After about 20 mins of lameness, I raised my fist to Hitler for ruining my fucking night, if motherfucker had done his job right, this party would have been a hell of a lot better. I also went through some self discovery because used to have a Jew fetish but realized that these Jewish girls weren’t hot. If I wanted a pony, I would have asked for one for Christmas, don’t act like you don’t know what I am talking about horseface. I am not an anti-semite, some of my best friends are Jewish. But not my friend ROB who sent me these pics of Cindy Margolis in Playboy, if he was Jewish, he would have charged me for them. I am 100 percent sure I am the first person on the Internet with these and that makes me better than you.

UPDATE:

Dear Customer:

It has come to our attention that your server located at [207.44.162.82] is in violation of our AUP/TOS by way of the following URL(S):

http://www.drunkenstepfather.com/index.php/2006/11/01/i-am-cindy-margolis-playboy-pics-of-the-day/

The URL(S) stated above is in violation by way of unauthorized use of materials owned by Playboy.

At this time we must demand that you take prompt action in the removal of the Content in question or we will be forced to take further action. The time is now 11/3/2006 9:10:17 AM. As of this email you have 72 hours remaining

To better serve you please login to the members section and update the trouble ticket in reference to this email. Thank you in advance for your prompt cooperation.

—
Regards,
Abuse Team

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Halloween is a fantastic day to kidnap kids. It’s a great day to put razor blades in apples for kids. It’s a great day to invite kids back inside to get that extra candy that you have hidden in your ass. It’s a great day to go out and buy tequila shots for girls dressed like whores. It’s a great day to wear women’s panties in public and mask your weird fetish behind the nature of the holiday. There’s all kinds of perks today. I suggest you don’t kidnap or poison kids. I know you can’t afford tequila shots and everyone already knows you wear women’s panties, so why don’t you just click my links instead fucker.

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The people at JULIESROOM.NET sent me some fan signs. I’d jerk off to their amateur porn video collection if I could get it up…but I cant’ but you can so do the fucking math on that one pervert.

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This is Tera Patricks’ costume from some party she hosted. I don’t really understand why she’s wearing anything, considering the fact that we have all seen her naked and getting fucked. She’s a dirty whore who has seen more dick that you have, and you’re a closet case faggot with a gay porn addiction. Either way…these are her pics….

Speaking of herpes, I am watching Dr Phil, because it’s what I do at 5 pm on weekdays. It’s all part of being unemployed. They are talking about how a woman with a Femmullet landed herpes from her cheating husband. That makes me laugh, not because I think herpes is funny or because I think innocent people deserve herpes and I really hate the fact that banging bitches can result in death, or painful cock sores, or burning when it pees, but the fact that these 2 white trash bitches are pulling a Jerry Springer on this show and the fact that the world knows she’s got vagina issues is funny in an embarrassing way, like when you shit your pants when you think you’ve got to fart. I generally hate bathroom jokes but I am trying to figure out a reason why I am laughing without admitting that I am a fucking asshole and love other people’s pain.

Speaking of Assholes, Here’s a message one of my readers wrote KELS. If you don’t know who KELS is, read my previous post.

here’s my message to your friend KELS,

Hey! Saw your profile and thought I’d drop in and say HI! HI HI HI!!

I saw you had said you have a dirty secret on your, “About Me” section…I’m not going to lie…I have one too! I’ll share with you! I was jerking off to your fat ass picutres in your fat ass “pics” section and some of my cum landed on the “K” key on my keyboard!!! I thought it was funny though becuase your name starts with a K too!!! Gosh, I should buy a lottery ticket today!

I know that sounds kinda gross Kels, but seriously, I just can’t help myself when I’m looking at 5’2″ fat girls on myspace with teeth that look like they’re trying to run away from your face and with what I can only guess are dinner plate sized nipples. Don’t get me wrong Kels, I love dinner plates…if it weren’t for them I would have to eat my food on the floor with the homeless! Silly homeless people.

Aaaanyways. Just wanted to say I love you and that you made my day better. We should totally get together sometime and listen to music! Looks like you like your music almost as you like your cake!

love,

puddin

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Hayden Panettiere was the next girl on my To Stalk List. I came across these topless pics and felt like I should post them. I am not into blood and guts but it is halloween. I am also not the one who came up with this joke, some dude emailed it to me today and it made me giggle like a school girl who just got an A for sucking my english teacher off….Either way, I can accept that there are a lot of useless people in the world. Some of those useless people happen to be you. I will not be stalking Panettiere, she’s boring, but I will be making someone famous in this post…..

I was going through my comments and this is what I came across.

this site is absolutel smutty trash. why dont u guys actually do some real stories? u guys clearly suck at this. and to the racist bastard, why dont u go to another site just like i’m about to do….duh

So I sent her this email

I noticed that you commented on my site. I was interested in finding out more about you. Such as what you are wearing, how many times you have given a blowjob and how much cock you’ve had inside your dirty stinky asshole. I am down with anal, unfortunately I cannot get it up. I used to be an alcoholic and have since developed and prostate problem. The doc says it’s the size of a baseball…..I’d love to let you massage it.

In conclusion, thanks for visiting the site and I am happy to know that we are in love.

Keep up the indie music cat…

With Love

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

And she responded:

u really are pathetic arent u? to actually single 1 person out by sending her an email. lol. ur hilarious. so far ur site sux and i regret going to it and doubt that i will ever visit it again. so u wont have to worry about my comments any more…

oh and to answer ur questions: i’m wearing a mini skirt and a long sleeve white top. I only give it up to my bf and that is our little secret.I guess u’ll be spending more lonely nights photoshopping boobs, nipples, and chochas onto celebs. lol. Oh and i thought my email was supposed to be private….see this is why ur site sux, u dont deliver what u say u will deliver. and u should step outside of ur online character/personality because it doesnt do anything for u. show something that is worth viewing or looking at on ur site, perhaps more viewers will check it out and i could possibly return to the site as well. good luck with ur filth.

My Last Email….

My site may suck, but I just made you famous, Bitch

And I visited her myspace only to find out that KELS is Black, and KELS takes pics of herself in her bra to show off her FAT tits, and that KELS has fat tits, because she’s been eating too much KFC and KELS doesn’t eat too much KFC because she’s black, KELS just can’t get enough of what fried fucking chicken has done for her physique, so KELS decides to make a myspace profile and KELS decides to beg for the attention daddy never gave her because he was in jail by taking naughty pics and getting perverted boys to message her asking for more….with less clothes and KELS decides to rip into my site by using her real email and calling it SMUT, and KELS real email leads me to her myspace only to find out the smut that is being published online is not only coming for me but it’s also coming from KEL and I can’t help buy pat myself on the back because this shit couldn’t have worked out any fucking better. I am not a racist, but I am still going to get shot.

Visit her myspace GO , and send her sexual harrassing messages….

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Look how clever Jennifer Love is…she knows that it’s halloween and that it’s a time to dress like a whore and here she is rocking a Charlie Chaplin suit. Something about as attractive as jerking off to pictures of your great grandfather outside the saloon during the gold rush. To make things worse, she’s walking around with a notepad, because I can only assume she’s dressed like the “Silent Film”. Something about as obnoxious/pretentious as people who make you pronounce thier names different than they are spelled, or the people at the front of your class challenging the teacher by asking stupid questions, but using big words to overcompensate. I guess the fact that she’s with Justin Timberlake is also annoying, because that means motherfucker is keepin’ her titties all for himself. I hate bitches who don’t show off their tits when we all know they have tits because what it comes down to is that Justin Timberlake looking motherfuckers shouldn’t be the only one to bask in the sunshine that is her cleavage….while writing stupid shit on notepads at halloween events because he’s so fucking ironic….suck my dick whore.

Speaking of whores, here’s an email that I’ve decided is worthy of being the EMAIL of the day….

This is what I’m talking about. I love a good fingering, I hope you use 2 and I hope you know what you’re doing. If you did all that, you’d notice right away that I’m wet all over right off the bat. It doesn’t take me long to warm up to you and licks from behind really fucking turn me on. I would get off, Jesus. Likely, my ass would start quivering and I’d be moanin’ low. I like to grab my tits when I get off, because the nipples get all hard and I feel all sexy like that. I’d be hoping you slip it in while I was a quivery and drippy and begging for it with my body that way I could keep coming over and over and over…

How do you like it best? Because I try it all the ways…I’d do anything you wanted (almost). I aim to please you Jesus, you could pose me around like a doll, and I’d like it. If you didn’t want to take charge like that, I might be a little bashful at first, I’m not going to lie, I am not typically the agressor in bed, but I don’t mind after awhile, and I’d end up on top of you because I know how to wiggle my hips to give myself these incredible orgasms and plus I look super sexy doing it with my hair all down near my tits and my head back, on display

Too bad I am impotent….

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