Unsorted Archives - Page 149 of 511 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

04

May

I am – Lohan Goes to See Britney’s Concert of the Day

I decided that I respect the socially awkward losers who make up the internet, because without them the internet wouldn’t exist. I know people who are actually good looking and successful are too busy being good looking and successful to actually read websites so it’s people like you that may be the stain on society but so important to the future of media, because as it turns out there are more socially awkward virgins than good looking people, and that is why we have the internet.

I was on some celebrity forum looking for pics of Britney’s concert in Anaheim last night and came across so many arguments as to whether a nipple slip was real or a fake. I don’t know if the people sitting at home on their computers, creating the nipple slip are creepier than the dude at home who is analyzing the nipple slip and contesting it’s legitimacy. Either way, you’re creepiness is okay by me, as long as you’re not luring teens from myspace to meet you in the park for sex, then it’s not very harmful, maybe just to your changes of becoming successful and less socially awkward.

Anyway, Britney performed at a House of Blues again and one of my loyal internet girlfriends went to the event. She got her tickets off craigslist for hundreds of dollars and when she got to the venue the security made her check her phone and camera so the only person leaking at the event was Britney’s rancid vagina.

My loyal internet girlfriend told me that the experience was amazing, Britney lip synced the whole thing, performed for 15 minutes and gave Lohan a dirty look when she was singing “I See You Looking at Me” and pointed right at Lohan. Sounds kinds psycho to me but that’s all the inside scoop I can handle today….

These are pics of Lohan on her way into the event, looking as good as she gets….

Posted in:Concert|Lindsay Lohan|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

04

May

I am – Spice Girl Reunion of the Day

50 Comments »

So I’ll Tell You What I Want, What I Really Really Want, and that’s for the Spice Girls to go back in time and look like they used to . I know that aging is all part of life, otherwise we’d never get old and life would be all Peter Pan pedophile shit, but looking at them now, all post pregnancy or currently pregnant brings back pretty vivid drunken memories of me trying to jerk off to their music videos. I guess what I am trying to say is that life ends for a chick after she gives birth, her body goes to shit and she should probably do whatever she can to stay out of the public eye as much as possible, because sometimes it’s nice for us to remember the good times, and not be forced to witness the demise…Sure, I can respect that having a family and creating life and all that shit is beautiful in theory, but no one ever said it makes you pretty and I have little interest is seeing a once tight bodied Scary Spice’s Eddy Murphey induced cellulite. That’s all I have to say about that.

On a side note, I have no idea what they are doing hanging out together, I can only assume they are going to try to cash in on being mom’s by launching some children’s album or some shit, but they are probably more like the moms who meet at my starbucks after doing mommy yoga together, to discuss how amazing life is and how having a baby changed their life forever, setting up a life of competing amongst friends about which kid is the best and laughing at their single friend who is still going out every night and fucking random men trying to fill that void…..At least they are doing it dressed like sluts….

2007

04

May

I am – Stacy Keibler Playing Volleyball of the Day

7 Comments »

Ok – So I haven’t quite got the fat slob strippers out of my system, I wish I wasn’t poisoned by what I saw, but I can’t really help it. I feel this is what kids feel like when they see their parents fuck. I never really knew my parents because my mother was a hooker in Mexico and my dad was one of her John’s, at the time of her death, we had narrowed it down to 10 potential clients of hers, but that doesn’t really matter, what does matter is that she always banged in front of me, but it was her job so I don’t think it was that traumatic, or as traumatic as it would be for you to think of your mom on all fours taking it from your dad….

Either way, these Stacy Keibler playing volleyball pics, remind me that not all girls are lazy slobs who don’t realize they are lazy slobs and decide to live the hot girl with insecurities and daddy issues life as a stripper. Let’s hope that that is all I really have to say about this….because it’s starting to get boring, I know. Just look at the pics…Cuddles…..

Posted in:Legs|Sports|Stacy Keibler|Unsorted|Volleyball

2007

04

May

I am – Ali Larter Isn't Wearing a Bra of the Day

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After tonight’s strip club incident of every chick being 200 lbs, I have decided that I only want to see chicks showing off their small tits tonight. It’s proof that there is too much of a good thing, because sure the bitches I saw had tits bigger than your head, but their cellulite ridden massive flat asses and waddling almost turned me off women, at least for the night…which I didn’t think was possible I came home wanting to crawl into a ball and cry because when the bitches were on stage, my brain kept telling me to stop looking but it was like I was lured into some kind of trance as their stomachs smacked them in the chin while they flashed their massive cunts.

I am married to a fat chick, so you’d think I could handle the shit, but I am went there to get away from the hell I am living and got stuck with that shit thrown in my face, over and over and over again…Maybe god was punishing me, but at least these pics landed in my inbox.

I am going to try to stop talking about this shit, but I am still in shock about the whole experience so have a little compassion man…

Related Posts:

I am – Ali Larter Stickin’ Her Tongue Out

Posted in:Ali Larter|cleavage|Tits|Unsorted

2007

04

May

I am – Ali Larter Isn’t Wearing a Bra of the Day

50 Comments »

After tonight’s strip club incident of every chick being 200 lbs, I have decided that I only want to see chicks showing off their small tits tonight. It’s proof that there is too much of a good thing, because sure the bitches I saw had tits bigger than your head, but their cellulite ridden massive flat asses and waddling almost turned me off women, at least for the night…which I didn’t think was possible I came home wanting to crawl into a ball and cry because when the bitches were on stage, my brain kept telling me to stop looking but it was like I was lured into some kind of trance as their stomachs smacked them in the chin while they flashed their massive cunts.

I am married to a fat chick, so you’d think I could handle the shit, but I am went there to get away from the hell I am living and got stuck with that shit thrown in my face, over and over and over again…Maybe god was punishing me, but at least these pics landed in my inbox.

I am going to try to stop talking about this shit, but I am still in shock about the whole experience so have a little compassion man…

Related Posts:

I am – Ali Larter Stickin’ Her Tongue Out

Posted in:Ali Larter|cleavage|Tits|Unsorted

2007

04

May

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

2 Comments »

I guess I have no choice but to do a stepLINKS. I know at least 4 of you rely on this shit to entertain yourself, even if the shit I post is dated. I wasn’t in the fucking mood to do it, but I pulled through. I went to a strip club tonight and all the girls were fucking busted. I am not talking about busted like you’d expect a stripper to be, I am talking busted like you’d expect the clerk at McDonalds to be naked. I am talking bitches who looked like they were on the McDonalds diet, trying to recreate that Supersize Me movie I never saw. They were fat, and not sexy fat, like she’s just a bigger chick who knows how to move. They were fat like they are a bigger chick who you are surprised could actually get on stage and support her weight long enough before either collapsing or dying. Either way, here are my links, I am sure I’ll be feeling better about things tomorrow, when I sober up and forget this night ever happened. Cuddles.

Heidi Montag Bikini Showing Off Her New Tits of the Day
GO

Kate Bosworth in a Bikini for a Third Time This Week
GO

Lohan’s Hacked Facebook Profile With Slutty Pics
GO

Some Girl Getting Naked On the Street
GO

Dirty Bachelor Party Video
GO

Andy Dick Hitting The Bag
GO

Gloria Trevi was the Token Whore at an Awards Show
GO

This Video is Called Seagull Catcher and It’s Funny
GO

Next Door Nikki Gallery
GO

Natasha Hensdridge Has Big Tits
GO

College Girl Attacked When Flashing
GO

Steamy Miss Great Britain Contest
GO

Some Video Called Useless Cunts
GO

Girls Showing Their Asses While Partying
GO

Kate Bosworth Bikini – Round 2
GO

The Latest Superficial Friends
GO

Kate Bosworth Down Shirt Nipple Action
GO

Intense Asian Girls Making Out Intensely
GO

Paris Show’s Off her Paris Purse, I Don’t mean Her Vagina
GO

Lohan Looks Like a Fat Bloated Drunk Guy…Yes…She Looks Like Me….
GO

Drunk Sluts Playing in the Shower. I think I’ve Linked This Already, But Watch It Again
GO

Kate Moss Has Powder Stains on her Pants After Going Missing…
GO

Some Lame Card Trick
GO

A Couple of Kids Juggling Together Because They Are Lame
GO

A Video Called Brazilians are Hot
GO

Aida Yespica Posing In Underwear
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Lohan Caught Doing Blow on Tape
GO

Old Classic Pics of Adriana Lima and Ana Beatriz Barros in Bikinis
GO

Skinny Webcam Girl Humping and Dancing
GO

Mischa Barton Rocks a Wet T-Shirt
GO

Angelina Jolie Lookin’ Hot While Dancing
GO

New Red Hot Chilli Peppers Video
GO

Sofia Verggara Stuff Mag Photoshoot Video
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More Jodie Marsh – Sexy Nurse Pics
GO

Geri Spice Showing Off Some Leg
GO

Ghost Caught on Tape – And That Scares The Fuck Out of Me
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Tori Amos Performing in some Lingerie Lookin’ Top for The Lesbians Who Read the Site
GO

Gorilla Masturbating
GO

Drew Barrymore Looking Disgusting in a Red Dress
GO

Paris Hilton Will Go to Jail
GO

This Video is Called – When Mormon’s Attack
GO

Lohan Parties With Paris
GO

Some Salesman For CHUBB Has a 7 Year Erection
GO

Angry Chicks Fight in the Driveway
GO

Topless beach Video 1
GO

Topless Beach Video 2
GO

Wife Washing A Car With Her Ass Hanging Out
GO

Topless Japanese Soccer
GO

Girl Waxing Accident Video
GO

Husband Watches His Wife Get Raped Video – NSFW
GO

Marisa Miller Black and White Photoshoot
GO

Samwell – What What in the Butt – Video
GO

Tila Tequila Topless Black and White Photoshoot
GO

This Chick Amanda is Up To Her Shitty Youtube Video Ways With Bad Songs and Experimental Dance
GO

SPAM of the Day
GO

Hollywood Inside Spy Reports on some Parties – If You Like Reading
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

03

May

I am -David Hasselhoff Exclusive Drunk Video

1 Comment »

I know Entertainment Tonight is on in about 30 mins where I live because I only have one channel and it is usually on in the background while my fat wife eats her chips, but this video is of David Hasselhoff wasted being filmed by his daughter and it is pretty fucking funny. I just spent the day at the casino because all my friends got their welfare checks and thought they would win big so that they wouldn’t have to be on welfare anymore. I guss their investment and money making ways is the reason they are on welfare to begin with, but I never turn down a good time. I only had 15 dollars and I lost it in about 5 minutes but it was still nice to see where all of society’s retired trash end up on a thursday afternoon. It was like a fucking old folks home field trip and I tried to seduce a couple of them into giving me some money to play with in exchange for oral sex, but they weren’t having it. In the end I got kicked out for stealing an old man who was asleep at his slot machine’s bucket of quarters, but I didn’t get arrested.

Either way, watch Hasslehoff in drunken action with his daughter, at least he isn’t touching her inappropriately like you would be. Sicko.

Posted in:David Hasselhoff|Drunk|Unsorted|Video

2007

03

May

I am – Day Dreamin' of Spiderman 3 of the Day

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I think I hate Spiderman. I was never into comics, cuz I liked vagina. I was never into comic book movies because I liked vagina. I have been forced to watch shit like Superman, Batman and even Spiderman at times I was trying to get vagina, but I never made the choice to see one of these movies on my own, it was always to please someone else who had a vagina. I have been seeing the major promo kick for this movie all over the place with premieres in China and other places around the world, I know that the studio is trying to make this a huge blockbuster smash, and it probably will be one, because there are a lot of virgins who like comics out there and thanks to them, their 10 dollars will line the pockets of asshole movie producers that will never give me a stepfather movie but will instead make shit like Spiderman 4. I will just never end and I blame you….

Whenever I get stressed out thinking about these people making more of these movies, I like to slip into a day dream of what life would be like, if Spiderman worked the streets of my city, dancing and panhandling by day and ridding the world of crime at night by drinking himself into the gutter he’ll crawl out of the next day to go back to the streets and dance some more, using his Spidey Suit to keep him warm on those cold winter nights at the homeless shelter. Here’s the video.

The real Spiderman 3 hits theatres on Friday.

Posted in:busker|spiderman|stepDAYDREAM|stepTV|Unsorted

2007

03

May

I am – Day Dreamin’ of Spiderman 3 of the Day

5 Comments »

I think I hate Spiderman. I was never into comics, cuz I liked vagina. I was never into comic book movies because I liked vagina. I have been forced to watch shit like Superman, Batman and even Spiderman at times I was trying to get vagina, but I never made the choice to see one of these movies on my own, it was always to please someone else who had a vagina. I have been seeing the major promo kick for this movie all over the place with premieres in China and other places around the world, I know that the studio is trying to make this a huge blockbuster smash, and it probably will be one, because there are a lot of virgins who like comics out there and thanks to them, their 10 dollars will line the pockets of asshole movie producers that will never give me a stepfather movie but will instead make shit like Spiderman 4. I will just never end and I blame you….

Whenever I get stressed out thinking about these people making more of these movies, I like to slip into a day dream of what life would be like, if Spiderman worked the streets of my city, dancing and panhandling by day and ridding the world of crime at night by drinking himself into the gutter he’ll crawl out of the next day to go back to the streets and dance some more, using his Spidey Suit to keep him warm on those cold winter nights at the homeless shelter. Here’s the video.

The real Spiderman 3 hits theatres on Friday.

Posted in:busker|spiderman|stepDAYDREAM|stepTV|Unsorted

2007

03

May

I am – Lohan Partying at Some Event in her Bra of the Day

1 Comment »

Thanks to facebook groups, I realized that the event everyone was freaking out about Lohan being in her bra and cocaine being found in the VIP room at the Twin Palms Estate last weekend was organized by a club I can’t get into because I don’t wash. To see the pictures I am talking about CLICK THIS LINK.

These pictures of Lohan were put up in their group today and I figured I’d post them because I didn’t see them anywhere else. The event was called Music Loves Fashion and Steve Aoki and some dude named DJ Skeet Skeet were DJing. From the pics Paris Hilton and Lohan were both getting down and dirty, but that’s to be expected because they are party sluts….

I used to go to clubs and get drunk and be an asshole to people I knew. Maybe it was because they were landing hot girls and I was getting kicked out for passing out on the bathroom floor, but in my drunken stupor, I used to go around and tell girls my friends were trying to sleep with that my friend had Aids, they would get pissed off at me, but still go home with them, but would make them wear a condom

The next day I’d get the call saying how much of an asshole I was for fucking up their chances to have raw dog sex and I’d just say that I am a modern day superman because any bitch who goes home with a guy you tell her has AIDS is probably not the kind of girl you want to end up fucking without a condom….

Point of the story is that I save fucking lives and here are pics of Lohan destroying hers….I guess I coulda gone with the whole Paris and Lohan being the kind of girl you would end up baggin without a condom only to beat yourself up the next day for doing it and getting tested monthly for the next 3 years because of it, but I guess that woulda been too obvious for me to do…

PS – Since every blogger steals exclusive pics, I figured I’d watermark it my way, with a solid cumshot on every fuckin’ pic….admit it’s amazing.

Bonus Picture – Lohan at Coachella With Her Lesbian Lover via thecobrasnake

Related Posts:

I am – Lohan’s Partying in Pantyhose

I am – Lohan Drunk Partying

I am – Lohan Parties in Japan

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