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Archive for the Unsorted Category

2007

08

Jan

I am – Keira Knightly Bikini Pics of the Day

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This site is all about bikinis lately. I had a dream last night that I actually hunted down good content on the internet instead of always posting the same recycled garbage other people are posting. I started posting the celebrity pictures as a bit of a scam, luring people into the site, giving them pictures and hopefully winning them over with my genius writing. I don’t think that ever really worked out for me because the second I move away from the celebrity bikini pics my traffic goes to shit and I get hate mail. That said, here are some more bikini pics of Keira Knightly. She’s got a tight body, little tits and a hot ass and is worth a round. I know that round is not likely to happen for any of you because sex isn’t a familiar activity for you, but it will happen for her boyfriend with a girl hair, just look at how he’s molesting this slut…

I like girls who put out. I am watching the news now, because I only have one channel, it’s been pretty fucking exciting, but not as exciting as this post which has no jokes embedded in it like a youtube video because I was hanging out at a taxi stand earlier today and my cab driver who looked like he was hit by a bus and spoke like he had brain damage told me that I should apply for a job at Google, because working there is like being on a honeymoon….he also told me that life is all about being chill, so in bein chill, I sat at that taxi stand for 5 hours and neglected this site. We talked about how vegetarians are gay. You’re welcome.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

08

Jan

I am – More Keisha Buchanan Bikini of the Day

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I am being accused of being a racist because of my black guys dancing like monkeys like I was watching the nature channel. I am not actually a racist, I watch Oprah, real racists HATE Oprah. I admit that I do make fun of everything, but when I am at a bar and the only people on the dance floor were black dudes dancing like they were doing some tribal hunting dance, I feel the need to report back to you. If I was in a club and a bunch of white guys were doing the same arm swagger air humping, I’d write about that…so stop sending me emails about how I am a piece of shit racist and just try to visualize what I saw becuase it was funny. That said, I was drunk all weekend and I don’t think anything funny really happened. IT’s 5 pm, most of you fuckers are leaving work and I am just getting started….

I figured what better way to start the week of this non-racist site than to post pics of Keisha Buchanan from Sugababes a UK music group in Miami, in her bikini, next to some topless chick…because I don’t discriminate when it comes to bikini pics, especially when that bikini is a thong bikini.Cuddles.

PS – I heard some dude is bribing Oprah…what’s up with that…doesn’t he realize that she is a savior to our generation…I’m talking feeding the African Aids Babies and giving them shoes…proving that it pays to have Aids when Oprah’s in the room…amongst other things. I guess I’ll go google that while you look at these pics. Pervert.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

07

Jan

I am – Kate Moss Topless in Thailand of the Day

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I was going to save these and post them with an actual post. I drank a 26er of vodka and I can’t sleep. It’s 6 am and I’ve decided that I am going to be a star. That said, even if it doesn’t pan out for me, at least you’ve got some shitty Kate Moss topless in thailand pics. This post is short, but so is my 6 am drunken attention span. Cuddles.

I was going to make a joke about how her little titties are perfect for thailand because thailand is a pedophile’s hangout but decided that was a stupid joke, even in this stupor, then I was going to talk about how her friend’s tits hang to the ground like her nipples are trying to feel the beach sand underneath their nipple feet but the small titties don’t give them the distance they need, but realized that was a worse joke. Fuck you. I don’t see you working at 6 am sunday morning after drinking a 26er of vodka. This is commitment.

Either way, I am in love with Kate Moss….

For More Go HERE

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

05

Jan

I am – Keisha Buchanan Bikini of the Day

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I don’t know who this bitch is, her name is Keisha Buchanan, so she must be black. She is in some UK band called the Sugababes. I am posting these because she is in a bikini and this has been Bikini week. I am not posting these because she is hot. I am also posting this because she is black and from the UK and out in the sun swimming, which is pretty much a Christmas miracle because black people don’t swim and people from the UK hate the sun…




Speaking of Christmas Miracles, I was talking to a couple of celebrity bloggers on AIM and they said that some asshole from VH-1 contacted them. The reason he is an asshole is because he is the producer of some celebrity round-table type of show and they want some insiders to discuss celebrity. Now I know that this site sucks and that I don’t know much about celebrities, I know that I am not that pretty and not really someone that anyone would want to see on TV, but I do know that hands down this site is a fuck of a lot more interesting than any of the sites out there. I know that I have no interest watching some virgin geek with a solid grasp on WordPress and link exchanges with other virgin geeks talking about celebrities like they fucking know what’s up because they read about it on TMZ.com or ContactMusic or FemaleFirst.co.uk….See I know what is up and I want networks fighting for a drunkenstepfather show.

If you work for VH-1 and you’re reading this, let your boss know he’s a fucking cunt for sleeping on the future of entertainment, not to say that I am the future of entertainment, but I figure you gotta go in with that attitude if you want to sit at a round-table with all the Junior Perez’s out there and I know you don’t actually work and that you live in your mom’s basement, so asking for help was me being funny, because I know you can’t even help your mom bring in the groceries….

Here are the pics….

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

05

Jan

I am – Rihanna Bathing Suit Pics of the Day

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It’s a race against time, my computer battery is about to die and I need to pump this post out. I feel like I am James Bond or some shit, but a lot lazier. I went out to a club last night, it was the first time I had been in a club in a long fucking time. I was given a VIP Pass to get in when I was sitting on a bench near by, so I decided to go up and look for content and check out tits. When upstairs, I ran into a bartender I knew from my raving days. I wasn’t one of those fur pant wearing queers, I was more of a sexual predator to girls jacked on E. He got me drunk and in my drunken stupor noticed that all the black dudes in the place were dancing like monkeys. I am not being racist, I just felt like I was watching the nature channel and this was their mating ritual.

Speaking of black people, here are some pics of Rhianna in a bathing suit pics because I am keeping up the bathing suit theme for the week, but before you start jerking off, check out her Michael Jackson skin rash on her upper thigh, right next to her cooter, I can only assume it’s not just a birthmark….

Now here are them there pics…

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I beat the clock…

Posted in:Bathing Suit|Rihanna|Unsorted

2007

05

Jan

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I went to the bank today because I owe them money. They busted me depositing empty envelops and withdrawing cash from my stepdaughter’s bank account and they were going to arrest me, but realized that I only did it for $40 and cut me a deal. So I had to go in there and pay them back the $40. When I was waiting in line 2 Jewish looking rich girls were talking about Perez Hilton and Donald Trump’s wife’s tits. That’s when I realized that no one talks about me when they are in banks 10,000 miles away. I just don’t have that staying power or that many readers. So today I decided to do a NSFW link dump. My site is blocked in all schools and businesses around the globe, so I figure why the fuck not…. I am not a porn site but for this stepLINKs, I’ll pretend to be. Enjoy.


Hannah The Hot UK Naked Chick Doing a “Tail” Dance
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Donald Trump on Rosie – These Guys Answered Yesterday’s Prayers…
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Nikki Sixx has a Clothing Line. So Lame it’s NSFW
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Pornstar Boxing Video
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This is Called – Not Jennifer Aniston’s Tits
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Allison Angel Shows her Box in an Austrian Outfit cuz She’s Crazy Like That…
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Anyone Who Reads This Site Knows I Love Creepy Celebrity Stalking Montages…
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Scarlett Named Most Beautiful Celebrity of All Time…
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Some French Girls Yells at Her Mother While Getting Naked For The Webcam – Amazing and NSFW
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Top Free Amateur Porn Site Ever
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This is Called Urban Pin-Up Because the Bitches Pose Topless and are Hipsters..
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Paris Hilton Turns Down a Sex Doll, because anyone who would have bought one has already fucked her….
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This is Called Melanie Brown See Through Top
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Old Cameron Diaz Bikini Pics
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This Cam With Her Clip on Heavy is Sponsored by Burger King, Xbox, Adidas and Samsung…I have no Idea How these Motherfuckers pulled this off but they are way fucking cooler than me – obviously.
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This is Called NYE’s Hipster In Her Panties…
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Nell McAndrew Megapost
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Some Big Booty Girl Shows Off her Ass and Gets Fingered – This is Borderline Porn, But No Penis, Sorry Homos.
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Some Bitch Named Luna does a Sexy Webcam Show
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Miss USA to Do Playboy
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart – With Vagina…
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Jessica White Isn’t White, But is Half Naked
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Some Guy Pretending to get a Blowjob by a Bitch.. I call this Not Safe Ever cuz it sucks…
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Girls Kissing for the Camera, You Like That Don’t You Virgin…
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Mashups Confuse Me – Here’s a Hot Mash Up of ’07 –
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Make Your Own NSFW Videos with the Power of this Cologne
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Columbian People Have Sex – This is Porn….
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Three Topless Girls at the Beach
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Some Dirty Girl Sent Her Boobs into Some Site
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Some Girl Stripping For Her Exercise Bike video
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Some Girl Dressed Like a Sailer Getting Naked on Cam
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Weird Asian Massage Video Part 1
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More College Tits Sent In
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Some Girl Masturbating on Webcam
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4tang is one of those Babe Sites, So If You Are Lookin For Babes Go There
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Academy of Muffins Boobs…
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Again, This stepLINKS was sponsored by JuliesRoom.net. They Bring Amateur Porn Clips to You For Free – Daily
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

04

Jan

I am – More Jessica Alba Bikini Pics of the Day

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I don’t really know what’s going on here with all the bikini content, I guess it could be because it’s winter vacation and I am definitely not complaining. If I was a celebrity I would be in a bikini all the time, but obviously not my own, if you know what I mean. That was example of a shitty play on words that didn’t really convert as solid as I would like it to. I was walking around a drug store because I needed to buy toilet paper, there are some things in life you have no choice but to spend your non existent money on, especially when your wife loves eating, if you know what I mean. If you don’t, I’ll make it pretty fucking clear, when she has to shit, it’s a fucking process, and for anyone familiar with the site, you know I don’t like talking about shit, but this is too fucking crazy to ignore….anyway, she waddles her fat ass in there and has to get me to undress her….she barely fits between the wall and the bathtub and when she’s seated you can’t even see she’s on a fucking toilet, it’s like the thing got sucked up in her or something….after about 25 minutes, I have to come in and clean up, you know flush and wipe her and the toilet down, her aim is a a little off and the smell is something I wish upon no one…That said, I was at the drug store and I saw these two 20 year old girls buying condoms, I looked at them, they looked at me and the next thing I know, security is there asking me to leave….

Jessica Alba is a lot like those girls in the Pharmacy. They weren’t all that hot, one of them had football shoulders but the fact that they fucked made me happy, even though condom’s are for pussies. I like the way this post came out, from Shit to Condoms to Sexual Harassment To Complimenting myself. Amazing.


Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

04

Jan

I am – Ashlee Simpson Bikini Pics of the Day

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My site gets worse and worse by the day. I used to feature freaks and perverts and whores who wrestle and now all I do is post celebrities in bikinis. I got an email the other day calling me a sellout for turning this into a celebrity blog, she went on to say that I am a fag like Perez and tried to rip into me for posting only celeb content. My answer to her is that Ashlee Simpson isn’t a real celebrity, she’s just a whore who wrestles in disguise and her dad is the freak and pervert….You see, I can talk about the underbelly and the sleaze of the world set to pictures of famous people because they may make money and they may be on TV and dropping garbage albums, but their daddy’s still touch them inappropriately, and they still let their hispanic boyfriends take their ass cherry. So fuck yourself for trying to dis what I do. The real underbelly of the world is these people and your stupid obsession with them.

That said…Ashlee’s got some love handle and a flat ass, a little too dumpy for me. I do like anorexic girls because their negative self-image and their self-destructive eating habits give me a fucking boner and I’m fucking impotent. Maybe it’s cuz my fat wife is on the other end of the spectrum and she makes me sick to my stomach when I have to powder her thighs. I know I talk about my impotency and my fat wife a lot but it is a little consuming. I was out yesterday and this bitch in tights, with legs as thick as her fucking ankles walked by me, at first I thought she was Asian or naturally skinny but realized she was Jewish and knew she wasn’t just skinny, she was anorexic or like I like to call them, the real skinny because they work so hard to be skinny. I guess I just like someone with a good work ethic. Cuddles.

These Pics are Shit Quality…Which is Appropriate Since Ashlee is a Pretty Shitty Quality Talent.

Here’s some Ashlee Simpson Bikini Collages…

Collage 1
Collage 2

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

04

Jan

I am – Lohan Bikini Action Again of the Day

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I don’t know where Lohan is finding her entourage these days but they are pretty busted but at least she’s wearing a bikini when she’s doing it. I just hope she isn’t banging no chin cuz that would definitely fuck up my game. I can never bang a chick when I see the trash she’s fucked in the past, but only because I am impotent and not because I have standards, because I don’t.

I don’t really have much more to say about this because it is 4 in the morning and I am drunk. So here are her pics.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

04

Jan

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I don’t understand why my site sucked so fucking hard today, but I guess it’s to be expected when working on a budget. I had a benedryl hangover all day and it was fucking weird. The whole day felt like a dream, but not the good kind of dream where you’re getting a blowjob and end up waking up with a mess all over yourself…not that I would know, when I could get it up, I jerked off so much that I never had a reserve to blow in my sleep. True Fucking Story. I found a really sexy store in the seedy part of town and I can get my girls some sequined low cut shirt/pant/cat suit thing. It was made out of rayon for $8.99, now all I need to do is make some money to make their dreams come true, and by their dreams I mean my dreams.. Click the fucking links. Asshole.

Mary Kate Olsen Biting a Stripper…
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Penelope Cruz has a Hot Ass
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Paris Hilton Got an Ice Cube Thrown in Her Face
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Melissa Satta Is From Italy
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Wasted Russian Crackwhore Video is Inspiring….Sad thing is that I couldn’t even afford a blowjob from her…
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Watch the Old Bam Sex Tape…
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Christina Aguilera – You Gotta Rub Me the Right Way Making of the Video
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Dumped Live on Radio Makes For Funny
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This is Something To Do With a Tara Reid NYE Countdown…I Don’t Get It…But the Again I Don’t Get Much…
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Mariah Carey Vs Mary Cary Video
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Here’s a Whole Lot of Naked Girl Galleries From YDM
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This Harry Potter Rap Looks Fucking Lame, Which Means You’ll Love It..
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Some Pam Anderson Nipples…
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Look it’s DJ AM and Some Hipster Miami Tits in the Same NYE Gallery…
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Here’s Some Beach Photoshoot With FakeTitties and Thongs
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Buy Some Shirts That Make People Laugh at You, Maybe It Will Make You Some Friends
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Hipster Puke Makes Me Feel Sexy
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20 Naked Asian Girls Jammed in a Photobooth
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Big Brother Brazil’s Better Than Big Brother Fat Chicks
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Melania Trump’s Naked Past
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World Pole Dance Championship Video
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Little Diva Should Be More Famous Than She Already Is Because She’s the Best Escort Atlanta Has To Offer….
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Rhiannon is an Alaskan Escort…Click on More Photos..
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart and She Can Be Yours for $150 an Hour
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Some More Jessica Alba Ass
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Justin Timberlake is Banging that Fat Bitch Scarlett Johannson
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Natalia Cigliuti does OYE Magazine
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I like Random Shit Sometimes…
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Spiderman Knocked Up Some Nasty Piece of Shit of a Girl…And This is the Result.
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Guys Get Laid When They Use This Spray and It’s Cheaper than Taking a Girl on a Date
GO

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted