DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2020

30

Apr

Luakathia is Your Quarantine Girlfriend of the Day

Yo, bro, have you heard of this site called MY FREE CAMS , it’s like netflix but live, and the shows aren’t shitty hollywood productions that cost too much and normally disappoint, but instead some do-it yourself live streaming like TV used to be where ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN….I’ve been visiting the site for years, but during the QUARANTINE the girls are going MENTAL on there…and it’s all FUCKING FREE….

EVERY NIGHT, I fall in love with one of the girls, and today’s QUARANTINE GIRLFRIEND Is LUA who along with 1000s of other girls is FUCKING bringing the entertainment harder than she was ELLEN…all ON THIS SITE

If you even have to ask yourself why I am loving everything LUA has to offer, then you’re a fucking idiot…just look at the damn pics and figure it the fuck out man….she’s fucking hot…now fuck off.

TO SEE MORE OF LUA BECAUSE SHE IS FUCKING HOT:
CLICK HERE

TO SEE MORE HOT CHICKS BEING HOT AS FUCK
CLICK HERE

Posted in:Quarantine Girlfriend

2020

30

Apr

Dua Lipa Nipples of the Day

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Dua Lipa’s right nipple is hard…or is that her left nipple…I can never tell the difference…I am dyslexic and ambidextrous…it’s all the fucking same…like her shitty pop music that she puts out…no different that other shitty pop music…it’s just the packaging that’s different and barely…as her entire generation of idiots are just robotic drones looking to take nude selfies for their only fans instead of getting actual jobs..

This one in particular was a model, was told she was too fat, so she took her tits to YOUTUBE to sing coversongs badly, but good enough to land a record deal and look at her now…doing all the modeling she wants as fat as she wants….

Her hard nipple, I can assure you is better than ANY of her shitty pop music that she puts out…that is no different than other hard nipples…but that keeps her lies and marketing nonsense relevant enough…because we as a people like hard nipples.

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Posted in:Dua Lipa

2020

30

Apr

Halle Berry See Through of the Day

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Halle Berry may be an old whore, but she’s still a whore, and that shouldn’t go unrecognized.

I am a firm believer in inclusivity and diversity and to write off a whore just because she’s old, despite putting the work in like she’s not old…wouldn’t feel right.

I know that Halle Berry was used as some figurehead for the black population to think that Hollywood is nice to black folk, so long as they were raised white because they are as white as they are black, since their blackness came from a sperm donor or one night stand depending what you consider her mom’s whore behavior to be…the same whore behavior that was taught unto her offspring so that she could take her hotness to Hollywood and make it as the accessible black girl…you know the plantation owner’s daughter that got sent to college not the plantation owners slaves being killed in the field level of BLACK HISTORY MONTH….

So long as she was able to imitate actual black people…something I bet she did by watching hours of tape of actual black people to really embrace her blackness in a believable way that comes across on film…

She’s an actor, that’s what they do. Bullshit….

Either way, still hot, showing nip, it’s good….

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Posted in:Halle Berry

2020

30

Apr

Charli XCX Bikini Bottoms of the Day

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No one even knows who Charli XCX, the bootleg Rita Ora who is the bootleg Rihnna is …there’s been a handful of popstars come out since she was taking a stab at it who all saw huge success…while she’s still out here probably 15 years or more later…still trying to get attention by using her naked or half naked body…

Instead of just working on making good music for her pop career that still hasn’t taken off….after 15 years of trying to use her tits to get ahead….

I figure it can’t be that hard to make 1 hit song when you have a record deal already and access to people who make hit songs….I think if I spent a year doing nothing but writing one hit song instead of blogging this bullshit all day everyday…I can assure you I’d have a song bigger than any of CHARLI XCX songs…and I am not musical at all…I can’t even whistle…but that’s possibly due to some herpes scarring…fucking whores and their fucking dirty pussies…

Speaking of dirty pussies…I think she’s got balls.

Posted in:Charli XCX

2020

30

Apr

Crystal Reed in the Bath of the Day

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Crystal Reed is 35 and from Detroit.

I don’t know if she fucked EMINEM or Jenny Jones…or anything else out of Detroit…like GM…I don’t know if she’s drank Michael Moore’s FLINT Michigan water….I don’t know if she bought a house back home for 100 dollars after the last financial crisis….I don’t even know who she is…

But she’s taking a bath, that I do know…

UPON GOOGLING her…I have discovered that Her television roles as Allison Argent in Teen Wolf, Sofia Falcone in the fourth season of Gotham and Abby Arcane in the series Swamp Thing. Reed has also starred in the films Skyline, Crush and Ghostland… she was rumored to have hooked up with actor Joshua Jackson in June 2016 after cheating on her boyfriend at the time…but she is not the mom of his recent black baby…

I have never seen one of those things…..but when you want to be famous and you’re not all that hot, but you are 35 years old which is far too old for that acting job….you need to make sure people remember you by inviting them to piss on you in the bath….or in this case virtually piss on you in the bath…marketing…

Posted in:Crystal Reed

2020

30

Apr

Nina Dobrev Bikini Bottoms of the Day

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Nina Dobrev is trying to do her best BIKINI BRIDGE which is such a solid coincidence because I just did my second BIKINI BRIDGE post in the history of the site….that is 15 years of no bikini bridge and all of a sudden Nina Dobrev has a bikini bridge…we must be living in a simulation….or maybe Nina and I are connected at our Canadian Souls…but I’d rather go with it being a simulation…where ALL my thoughts are tracked…making that whole microchipping thing less terrifying because we already are…this is like my some mind reading shit…almost like all those targeted ads only the PUSSY version…

EXCITING times, I know…

Posted in:Nina Dobrev

2020

30

Apr

Hilary Duff’s Mom Ass in a Athleisure Squat of the DAy

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I only recently learned that mom bloggers refer to athletic gear that they wear for non athletic purposes are called “Athleisure”…..which if I still went to grocery stores would make staring at mom pussy cameltoed as it tries to escape the “Athleisure” pants more exciting because I would know how to identify what I was looking at….

Unfortunately, my “Athleisure” experience which I guess you could call a fetish because I was really get used to everyone and their mom choosing spandex comfort over regular pants the last few years..allowing me to basically see their clits….is now reserved for the internet…

Luckily, women of all walks of life are whores ready to sexualize themselves in sexual positioning as it becomes more and more normalized…I mean even Hilary Duff is doing it.

That’s not to say the mom of two with different dads is out of control….but I am sure her first DISNEY casting involved a lot less clothing…and a lot more slutty….because that’s how castings go….which makes her a professional at this shit…that’s why she gets paid the big bucks…

Posted in:Hilary Duff

2020

30

Apr

Chloe Sevigny Ready to Drop of the Day

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Despite not being able to get Chloe Sevigny’s dick out of my mind since I first saw it…

The trendsetting “It-Girl” who you remember from being Jenny in Kids, or sucking Vincent Gallos Dick being EDGY in mainstream movies….

Is apparently pregnant at 50 fucking years old….and she’s bringing the belly out to prove to you all that it’s not some prosthetic like other trannies who have faked having kids like Gisele Bundchen…..

This BITCH has a fucking UTERUS and it’s not dried up or dead yet…which may be exciting to you ready to drop porn fetishists….like you’re even reading this…you’re still jerking off to her dick.

I thought this was her in a wheelchair..

Holy shit she’s old…and battered…like running into old ravers from the 90s who were all high energy and cool in the 90s…but who are now fucking zombies…

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Posted in:Chloe Sevigny

2020

30

Apr

Christa B Allen Lingerie of the Day

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I once wrote:

Christa B Allen posts topless pics on instagram, but unlike instagram models she has IMDB and WIKIPEDIA so she must be important…

Let’s take a journey into who Christa B. Allen and why her attention seeking hipster style instagram pictures are more than just thirsty instagram modeling but rather brand support to her career…

She started this celebrity thing in 13 Going on 30 in 2004….a movie you probably jerked off to…but she’s probably most proud of being cast “Teenage Girl” in Youth in Revolt in 2009….

TAKE THAT INSTAGRAM MODELS…this girl is legit….

I still agree with that. I have nothing to add. I wouldn’t say it’s the perfect post that took me 15 years to craft but I will say Christa B Allen and her shitty selfies isn’t worth my damn time to write original comedy everytime she posts a picture. I mean unless she was paying me…he should be paying me….my goal in all this is to get paid to post girls trying to be celebs…it’d be a waste of their money, but I’d spend it on alochol wisely.

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Posted in:Christa B Allen

2020

30

Apr

LV Angel is Back and Nude of the Day

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Universal Angel or LV Plastic is hilarious.

I don’t know if you remember her but she was one of the original international sugar babies of TUMBLR / INSTAGRAM.

She would travel to all these amazing places with rich dudes and document her adventures, rarely exposing the sugar daddies taking her on the trip, but she was hilarious throughout those years.

Everyone I knew followed her and we’d all share her insane misadventures, from getting a nose job in Turkey where she lost her fucking mind and cried about poor people or some other shit, it’s asking a lot of me to remember a Snapchat story from 5 fucking years ago.

Then there was another story where she shit on either the bed or on the dishes of some asshole AIRBNB owner and documented the whole thing…it was great times, entertaining times…simpler times.

The rumor is that she got banned from America for being a sex worker, she’s in Vancouver with a new boyfriend and not Sugar Babying….

She consistently disappears, but this last disappearance was a long one…but she’s back with a nude, with some nip, looking pretty much the same because not much has changed

Never forget LV Plastic / Universal Angel a true original…before EVERY girl became like this.