DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2020

11

Feb

Ariel Winter Troll in a White Lingerie Outfit of the Day

HEY LOOK – A troll in LINGERIE…

I don’t know what it is about Ariel Winter, but I assume it is her lack of a neck, and her weird looking face, that may have been cute when she was a child star starting out, in a kid being cute kind chubby cheek put her in a peanut butter ad kind of way but the became a terrifying cartoon character looking thing that you fell you want to throw gas on and light up….at least if you were to wake up next to her….after she drugged you at a party….provided it wasn’t the actual Ariel Winter…who I guess gets some bonus points for being a celebrity and rich as shit…making fucking her a small price to pay for that backyard pool and never needing to work again…as you devote your life to carrying her purse and washing her monster back…

She’s had a tit reduction but still had tits….take a look at that.

TO SEE Ariel Winter in her Weird Lingerie Outfit CLICK HERE

Posted in:Uncategorized

2020

11

Feb

Rebecca Black’s It’s Tuesday Titties of the Day

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Rebecca Black is from “It’s Friday” the dumbest viral song to ever go viral in a much simpler time when things went viral.

I figured that since her career is based on that dumb fucking song that makes me so glad that I don’t work in an office because I assume the same people who say “Happy Tuesday” or “Happy Monday”…are the ones who say “It’s Friday”…quoting the song so that YOU know they were on the internet 10 years ago….offices…the fucking worst.

So my genius joke, because I am a genius, I know from doing an online IQ TEST, is that it’s not Friday, It’s Tuesday Titties and bitch is on that tits get hits, because she’s had a hit and knows hits, but can’t have a second hit because the thing with Viral videos is they happen and then they disappear….a blip on the radar and most talentless idiots just go back to obscurity…despite their internet fame and money…so she’s got her tits out…to let you know she’s more than a viral video or a viral song…she is also busty…and since we like tits…I support that.

PAY ATTENTION TO HER!

Posted in:Rebecca Black

2020

11

Feb

Natalie Alyn Lind Big Cleavage of the Day

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Natalie Alyn Lind is one of the Alyn Lind sisters, who I guess has really big tits. Which in case you didn’t know is the measuring stick of how many followers a girl on social media can get. If you got the tits, you’ll get the hits. That’s what granny always told me….along with “you can’t rape the willing” before forcing me to eat her out. She was a big woman. So strong. I was so helpless. It didn’t taste like baked goods, more like the Cod Liver Oil she took for her arthritis…

Not that Alyn Lind has to worry about a GRANNY CUNT yet…she’s only 20.

What you need to know about these tits is: Lind is the oldest daughter of producer John Lind and actress Barbara Alyn Woods. She has two younger sisters, Alyvia and Emily, who are also actresses.

Meaning another LA rich kid…doing titty things to get noticed. Do they all go to the same publicist or career coach in some instagram modeling marketing class….”Ok, so what you want to do is show off your tits, and people will notice”….that is a school I could be a professor in. I am looking for work…that is my calling…this blog shit is a waste of time.

The above pic was show with a potato….

Posted in:Uncategorized

2020

11

Feb

Jordyn Jones Bra and Leather Pants of the Day

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Jordyn Jones is out in a bra. We still don’t know what Jordyn Jones does, but she’s doing something that instagram seems to like…and that is all that matters…

She got her start on some reality show about child dancers, which I am hoping you’ve never seen, but assume the WRONG kind of dudes would watch religiously. Sick fucks.

I assume that she was being sexualized back then, like a Madison Beer on YOUTUBE, the GOOGLE owned site for predators and from there she learned to sexualize herself, probably with the help of stage parents trying to live the fucking dream, and I guess this is living the dream….a yojng girl in a silly pony tail and leather looking but probably animal friendly outfits for the fans to jack off to. Everyone’s a fetish model….that’s how they make it in America.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jordyn Jones

2020

11

Feb

Kaley Cuoco and her Bolt Ons of the Day

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Kaley Cuoco’s husband or boyfriend, I really don’t give a fuck about Kaley Cuoco or keep up with any Kaley Cuoco news, posted this video of her face close up to show you how fucking terrifying the overpaid, worth over 100 million dollars, all because she was on that dumb fucking show you autistic fucks are into cuz it’s nerd oriented, where she played the “Hot chick” despite not being hot, and where she spent some of that 100 million dollars on new tits.

Kaley Cuoco posted up pics of her tits, that I assume were in video but I don’t have the GIF….or the video…so screen caps will have to do…I’ve already spent too much time on this old timer, who may be a crowd favorite, but who is pretty fucking trash to me…

Posted in:Kaley Cuoco|SFW

2020

11

Feb

Rowan Blanchard is a Hairy Armpit Disney Kid in a Racy Shoot of the Day

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Rowan Blanchard is in some sheer underwear, with some Butterfly nipple pasties covering the goods, while showcasing her hairy armpits because it is a generational thing, and despite being the number 1 Bush ambassador on the internet the last 15 years because I have always loved bushed and will forever love bush….if you read the site, I don’t need to go into the reasons why, I don’t need to write my love poem to bush, just know the bigger the better….

BUT I HATE ARMPIT HAIR….

Call me a misogynist….by I don’t seen how a bitch growing out her pits like nature intended it is attractive. We’ve been conditioned to hairless ARMPITS for a fucking reason. I was traumatized when I had an obese white trash foster mother who wore tank tops….she was a midget but midsummer I’d see sweat beading off her armpit hair as we were eating and I’d fucking gag….she thought it was me gagging to her tomato paste filled meal…and would punish me by raping me in the worst way possible any time I showed any level of protest….so I am fucking TRIGGERED by armpit hair.

Which means this ROWAN chick is totally insensitive to my needs as a VICTIM with her shameless showing off how feminist she is.

She won’t cave to our toxic masculinity and ideals…by shaving her pits, our NEW normal…and something France has been like “We’ve had armpit hair forever, stupid english people”…at least that’s what she’s saying but we see through it, you’re a fucking Disney Kid trend hopper doing what is marketable…standing their ARMPITS up in a “LOOK AT ME” …”LOOK AT MY ARMPITS”….drawing attention to herself with fucking neon signs and a marching band…and some asshole on the street corner flipping his sign….level of “LOOK AT ME AND HOW EDGY AND DIALLED IN I AM”…

For those of you who don’t know ROWAN, like myself, she’s Cory and Topanga’s kid in Girl Meets World….a Boy Meets World Spin Off that really only Launched Maitland Ward’s porn career.

From her wikipedia:

In a series of tweets in January 2016, she stated that while she had “only ever liked boys” in the past, she was “open to liking any gender” and therefore she identifies as queer.

So fucking deep you fucking victim / trend jumping idiot. What happened to Girls Gone Wild being mainstream behavior for girls….this whole “Queer, Feministy, Activist, Sex Assault Victim, Abortion Pusher”….is just dumb.

Posted in:Rowan Blanchard

2020

11

Feb

Jaime King Goes Full Retard in a Bodysuit of the Day

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I am not politically correct. I figure the one benefit of building a site off making offensive, off color jokes multiple times a day over the last 15 years, is that I can use words like “RETARDED”….I know that it may date me, and not in a dick in mouth kind of date, but let you know how old I am….because I like words like “Retarded”….I also like words like “FAG” and other things that have been banned from the internet cuz you are all a bunch of pussies…

So whenever I see anyone in a helmet, I automatically think of a retard just trying to live his best life without another brain injury from all his retard banging his head against the wall or stumbling while not masturbating at the public pool for the old ladies at aqua fitness.

Plus Jaime King is a fucking retard….a heroin addict model who had a boyfriend die of a heroin overdose like he was less skilled in heroin use than Demi Lovato…which is pretty fucking embarrassing to all the heroin uses…a Disney Kid is harder than you….and now she’s a fucking mom in LA pretending to be an important actress…but she is in on one piece.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jaime King|SFW

2020

11

Feb

Charlotte Lawrence Nude Dress of the Day

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I wouldn’t go so far as to say that Charlotte Lawrence is the future, but she is the most recent Hollywood raised rich and spoiled brat, who has decided that she has the talent or personality to be on stage, with fans of her own, through music or whatever it is that her parents are paying for.

This Kate from Drew Carey daughter is out here being “RACY” with some nipples exposed for attention and the whole thing is a hilarious situation because she’s a rich kid….with a career being bought for her…trying to be the next BILLIE EYELASH I guess….pretending she’s getting where she’s getting from her own merit, while the only reason I know she exists is her parents…because NEPOTISM works especially when girl is some pervert exhibitionist using the tits.

This is the new generation. Watch them walk that line of porn / mainstream….cuz they’ve been taking slutty selfies and watching porn thanks to being born into the internet era.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:charlotte lawrence

2020

11

Feb

Kate Beckinsale’s 40+ Year Old Ass of the Day

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Kate Beckinsale is here acting like 47 year olds are the new freshly turned 18 school girl discovering herself, when really it’s justa 47 year old, that has the same 47 year old pussy that has had 47 years of use, and that is not the “new 18″….even if it looks pretty skinny.

There’s not arguing that Kate Beckinsale is hot and that she looks amazing for her age, but she’s still old as shit, even if old as shit doesn’t look like the 40+ fetish mags we used to steal from the corner store in the early 90s because the store owner didn’t give a fuck if they went missing since no one was weird enough to be buying them.

But she’s still 47. Skinny yes…but 47.

As far as I’m concerned, along with being used as a fantasy to her weirdo nerd fans, her only other use is to make other 40 year olds and even 30 year olds feel like fucking shit about themselves, makes them easier to fuck…and maybe some 20 year olds feel like there is hope that they will be this good at 47 too….committing to a life of staying skinny….but 20 year olds are made different now and all about the fat.

Either way, mom of an 18 year old in slutty fitness pants holding her skinny ass all together should be enough to tap into your fucking weirdness, to help you visualize and live out all the fucking perv shit you’re into…cuz I know ya’ll are weird.

Her she is grinding up against a punching bag…for the perverts..