DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2017

25

Jul

Alexis Ren’s Casual Instagram Pic of the Day

The nice thing about instagram is that when a girl posts her picture it is just an honest version of herself, just a snapshot of that moment, of her letting you into her world like a cam girl, but less porny, but sometimes not that much less porny, thanks to being perverts who can make any situation porny….

It’s like girls never take 40 selfies to capture the best one to post, they don’t run it through filters and photoshop apps to really tone and fix their body…so that when you meet them in person, not that you will, you won’t have any idea who they are, it’s a security measure really, reformat yourself into a fetish or cartoon version of yourself and you will be safer, all while pretending to be some hot shit on the IG…

It’s a weird world, knowing that this pic was posed and edited and posted by the girl, rather than some creepy dude capturing the shot from afar…because sluts, exhibitionists, who love attention, are just making our lives and jobs as creepy perverts easier..they are FEEDING us their smut and as a lazy man who doesn’t leave the couch…I appreciate it.

Posted in:Alexis Ren|SFW

2017

25

Jul

Kendall Jenner Strategic Nude vs Kylie Jenner Strategic Selfie of the Day

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OH LOOK – Kendall and Kyle Jenner are whoring…they must be getting instructed by their team that due to summer vacation, their numbers are dropping and it is important to bring them back up, since the family’s future relies on them…you know being shameless, opportunistic whores requires STRATEGY…and apparently…plastic surgery, face injections and half nakedness….I approve of…but the rest of it…just take them out back and put them out of their misery for the benefit of society as a whole…

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|Kylie Jenner

2017

25

Jul

Heather Graham Not Too Old for Shameless Bikini Selfies of the Day

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If you haven’t jerked off to Heather Graham, than you have no business being on this site, because you aren’t from the right generation, where you’d jerk off to Boogie Nights for her tits, bush and all other things good about Heather Graham in an early 2000s era when you could still jerk off to the internet, you know when blogs like this started popping up…

That was a long time ago, and this girl, who was everywhere thanks to her big tits, in an era when that mattered because we didn’t have social media, thus making her tons of money…

Well, apparently, she’s trying to get a younger audience, by doing the shameless bikini selfies, despite being 50…and I’m all for it…if staying current and finding new fans comes with half nakedness…I’ll watch.

Posted in:SFW

2017

25

Jul

Ariel Winter’s Ass Tattoo of the Day

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Nothing says “My mom whored me off to execs at a young age, so I broke free at 18, walked around half naked, cut off my sloppy tits, only to regrow more tit, like a lizard growing limbs” quite like a tattoo that some broken girl who eats her feelings got that runs across her ass and that reads some really silly quote…that we can assume she finds inspiring and empowering, which in and of itself is hilarious, because it’s just a dumb fucking tattoo…

At least she’s posting up pics of the shit, like all these tattoo getting braggers…pretending they are unique and don’t care what other people think of them, while showing the world with all their ink just how much of a poser, lost, lose they are…

Posted in:Ariel Winter|SFW

2017

25

Jul

Eva Longoria Action Shot of the Day

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Eva Longoria may be one of those white bread first generation kids who forgets that her family crawled over walls and through tunnels to give her the great suburban life that allowed her to have the arrogance and confidence to become “an actor” which is hardly a real job, but some kind of joke spoiled brats take on to pretend they are more important than they are, so that they don’t have to get a real job, like people who understand the value of a dollar and who don’t have a dad to finance their LA experience while auditioning as Mexican roles…..

But she still knows how to swim like she’s jumping off a raft across the Rio Grande…just look at this dive, this form, off her overpriced yacht…like a swan…and angel…undetectable by radar and other border patrol on boat..it’s the one things she’s retained in her cushy, bratty, experience..

To SEE THE REST OF thE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Eva Longoria|SFW

2017

25

Jul

Sara Sampaio Looks a Little Bloated and Primate-Like in Bikini of the Day

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Sara Sampaio is the skinny Victoria’s Secret model who they brought in from Portugal to replace Adriana Lima, at least that’s what the even empire wants you to think they did, instead of realizing that she was raised in a lab from Lima DNA somewhere to be their staff model, because no one has ever heard of Sara Sampaio from Portugal, maybe they are too busy fishing…

Maybe their formula is falling apart, degrading, not sustainable or whatever, her skinny advocacy in a world where all brands use fat chicks, even though no one likes fat chicks, even the fat chicks, to model their bikinis, to speak to that market, knowing they hate that market and don’t believe in that market, as celebrating unhealthy is bad…but celebrating hot body is good….

Because she’s in Tulum, being a skinny advocate, while looking bloated….confusing me, in this world of every brand uses fat chicks, despite everyone hating fat chicks, while alienating skinny chicks, and manipulating them to become fat chicks, to get work.

It’s fucked up time…but good ass though..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Sara Sampaio|SFW

2017

25

Jul

Sara Underwood’s Possible Pee Fetish Pics of the Day

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As someone with a pee fetish…I like watching girls pee, seeing them pee, hearing them pee, peeing on them, but not having them pee on me, but peeing their panties…Sara Underwood in the pee position getting half naked or naked enough should be hot..

But not really considering she’s a playboy chick with clown tits – sex worker – low level porn chick – who sells monthly subscriptions to her pervert fans – to watch her porno snapchat that she gets naked on – even though it’s against SNAPCHAT policy….

But you can google her pussy and there’s nothing wrong with that…other than thinking about when Ryan Seacrest used to fuck it…but he’s more into anal, you know with being a homo.

Posted in:Sara Jean Underwood

2017

25

Jul

Sahara Ray Nipple of the DAy

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Sahara Ray posted a pic of her giant tit’s nipple, the spout that the golden milk pours out of, provided she lets the fetus grow inside her long enough before the abortion, that without kids serve no purpose other than to put out there on social media for everyone to see so that you seem to have some feminist stance on equality thanks to your tit in a mesh shirt, that I know, and you know is just being shameless..

Not that anyone cares about Sahara Ray and her hipster scenester tits, but she still matters enough to me, thanks to being early to instagram and having big fucking tits…

Posted in:Sahara Ray

2017

25

Jul

Joy Corrigan’s Bolt On Tits for Swim Week of the Day

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Joy Corrigan has some serious fucking bolt on tits, which is what you’d expect out of some Florida trashy girl with a great body, who has found a life of doing bikini photoshoot for catalogs, despite never having left Miami, but stayed there where she’s from, to really dominate the marketplace amongst every fat fucking trashy girl trying to be a bikini model, because of social media…at least this one has some substance, even if her tits are clown-like and comical..

This was from Miami Swim Week, where Joy dominated since it was all on her own sugar baby turf…

Posted in:Joy Corrigan|SFW

2017

25

Jul

Willa Holland Throwback Nudes of the Day

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Willa Holland was the younger sister on the O.C., which was a show I watched when it was on TV, because it gave me something to talk to college girls about, since I had nothing better to talk to college girls about, because even a decade ago, they were dumb, self involved cunts, with little to no substance, who relied on weekly TV shows and dumb punchlines from dumb movies as a starting point in a conversation, to really feel like they had enough of a connection to sit on your face later that night…I mean this was an era before everyone was online and we couldn’t just Facebook friend, selfie and tag each other on instagram or tinder, it required actual work to get laid like “OMG Marissa was such a bitch to Seth Last Week”…you know the shit that really makes a girl tick at her fucking core…because in case you didn’t know, there have been dumb sluts for generations, seducing them has just become way easier if you have even the basic level of intelligence..

She’s also some connected rich kid related to Steven Spielberg or some shit, and she’s on some nerd shit TV show, and does the hipster nude shit, and looks good enough to stare at,

Posted in:Willa Holland