I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2016

22

Mar

Kristin Cavallari’s Milking Herself of the Day

Screen Shot 2016-03-22 at 5.44.10 PM

Here’s some Kristin Cavallari posting a breast milking picture on the internet because she’s a mom, with tit milk, who breast feeds, and that needs to be celebrated in this oppressive social media world we live in, because social media thinks breast feeding is porn, and I guess it kind of is because you get to see nipple when it happens, but the whole baby latching kinda takes away from the boner…because of the whole baby and anyone who is breast feeding erotica loving…is straight up weird…like me.

Fascinating…for someone from the Hills, this is all she’s got going for her…

In more interesting – totally irrelevant cunt news, here’s Chelsea Handler trying to get some attention – FULLY NUDE…

chelsea-Hander

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari|SFW

2016

22

Mar

Bella Thorne Went to the Gym of the Day

Bella Thorne’s got a tight fucking body…and she’s got this shameless self promotion that is subtle, even comedic, in a fun and innocent way, an art I assume she crafted in her 40 years of trying to become famous, before realizing “just pretent to be 17 (now 18)”…unless she’s just a product of stage parents, who moved to LA to exploit their kids, and she is, up on some Taylor Swift kick, but without the shitty songs, but instead an acting career she subsidizes, since actors make shit money, by social media whoring….in all the right ways..

Her caption was: I usually don’t do upper body..but I was down to do a little back 🙂 I’m bringing sexy back. Get it..? I’m working out my back..?

Brilliant…relevant..current…now…ass…that ass…straddling..good job Disney, or whoever created her…it’s been a solid campaign…

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2016

22

Mar

Cindy Crawford for Zoo Magazine of the Day

Cindy Crawford_08

Cindy Crawford is older than the airstream she’s posing in…but she still looks good…I guess….I mean if botox on leathery cleavage is your thing..

There’s this thing called aging gracefully, where you age gracefully, and you don’t come out of the woodwork to show the world you can still model, we know you can still model, it’s not like being a model is difficult, just let us keep the memory of you…

Maybe I just hate watching women age because it reminds me of my own mortality….yeah that’s probably it…it’s got nothing to do with preferring grapes to raisins in an era when I can also just reference the gapes…using google search..to look at her old pics, I don’t need her to prove shit to me – she’s Cindy Crawford.

Posted in:Cindy Crawford|SFW

2016

22

Mar

Gigi Hadid’s Mom’s Nipple of the Day

yolanda-hadid-032216a

The shameless famewhore, money grubber, overrated brat doesn’t fall far from the tree…

This nipple is what probably didn’t feed Gigi and her whore sister, but it did create her to guarantee lifetime financial security for her model mom, and it did set up her PR machine that created her and made her a top model, but that doesn’t mean she’s not garbage, just another bootleg Kris Kardashian…because she is, it’s the Vapid LA dreams..

Posted in:Gigi Hadid

2016

22

Mar

Chemotherapy Selena Gomez Demonstrates the Side Effects of Chemotherapy of the Day

This is just like when you see those Bald Headed kids who ACTUALLY get chemotherapy going to Disneyworld before the premature death…you know because Selena Gomez has a terminal disease called Lupus, and last year decided to exploit her Chemo because she knew it sounded dramatic to boost sales and garner sympathy, a TAYLOR SWIFT marketing tactic…garbage..

Only in Selena Gomez’s case it involves partying at her cousins party, and throwing up in an elevator, you know side effects of Chemo are rough…

Posted in:Selena Gomez|SFW

2016

22

Mar

Courtney Stodden is a Monster in a Bikini of the Day

Courtney-Stodden-in-a-Bikini-2-683x1024

The highlight of my life was when I got invited to Courtney Stodden’s Halloween party back when she was the 17 year old bride who was actually 40 at the time, using an angel people bought, like she was Bella Thorne….but now, Courtney Stodden is not a funny novelty, her age has caught up to her, her plastic surgery has failed her harder than her sex tape, and her shameless attempts to promote herself with any angle that sticks, in this case TRUMP, is just pathetic….but I still think she represents the American dream, which may be terrifying, because it is…so graceful and harder faced that Shauna Sand and her dick..

Here’s a video from her social…

Posted in:Courtney Stodden|SFW

2016

22

Mar

Megan Irwin is Amazing of the Day

megan-gooseberry-35

I know what you’re thinking “I wonder if Megan Irwin is Steve Irwin’s daughter, you know the Crocodile Hunter, because that would be amazing, that guy was great before being dead”…

Because that is the only Australian Irwin I know, and you work by associatio because you’re half retarded and don’t think rationally that another Irwin could grace this earth..

Then you find out that this Megan Irwin, the most incredible looking model I’ve seen today, is actually Australian and assume that they must be related, that’s how she got into the industry, through ZOOLOGY, because Australia is an island populated by criminals from the Europe, leading to a limited depth in gene pool, but then why are all Australians so good looking, drunk, and a good time…if incest was really as bad as the hicks in the Ozarks make it look…

Either way, Australia or not, I’d still fuck her if she was my sister…that’s what this is about right? Megan Irwin being the future or something? Right…

BONUS – She’s one of the babes in Mario Testino’s Vogue Australia Shoot

Posted in:Megan Irwin|SFW

2016

22

Mar

Eliza Cummings Tits for Marie Claire Italy of the Day

cummings-7

Eliza Cummings is a 25 year old model who has never heard anyone make a cum reference to her name being cumming especially when you factor in how fucking good she looks, especially topless, like all models pretty are and should be, as that is their sacrifice to the world, their nipples, so that they don’t have to live a normal 9-5 life where they actually work, but rather get to focus on the important things in life like free hand outs, social climbing through sex, and finding rich guys to marry or get knocked up by, especially if they don’t start out rich.

She’s with a Rothschild, a member of the richest families in the world…a family rumored to won the world’s gold supply, and the route of all the conspiracies…but she likes him for his kindness.

Either way, here are her tits for David Bellemere, the hardest working man in the luxury, high end, tits photography…

I am pretty sure these are old pics, recycled, but tits are still tits…so tits.

Posted in:Eliza Cummings

2016

22

Mar

Em Rat Cow is So Busted of the Day

EmRat-1022

I didn’t want to post this pics, or endorse or support Em Rat Cow more than I already have, not because I hate her, I just think she’s overrated garbage that belongs in a strip club, unless her parents are rich, in which case dancing in the bottle service booth with other rich guys she fucks…

I don’t think she should be in movies or TV, because some misguided (word of the day) producer fucked her, likes her tits, or thinks Hype means dollar signs…even if the hype is just social media hype, not real hype, or talent or compelling anything, but tits…

Sure tits have historically got girls so far ahead, but we are in a world where we have options and just because these tits got millions of followers by being tits, doesn’t mean all the other tits out there don’t matter…so next time you see some tits, tell those tits you care, and that Em Rat Cow and her shitty face, even if she’s not a shitty person, but probably is, isn’t the only tits in the world, despite what Em Rat Cow is trying to say…or thinks…

She’s just like TILA TEQUILA from myspace, millions of followers, give her a show, let her ride hight 2-4 years, before self destructing because bitch never had it, it was all inflated lies…

She’s Had her 5 minutes – give it to someone else goddamn it..

THAT SAID…she’s got an amazing body.

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski|SFW

2016

22

Mar

Kendall Jenner is Not a Self Involved Cunt of the Day

Screen Shot 2016-03-22 at 10.00.51 AM

I guess seeing Kendall Jenner staring at herself would make you think “damn, this girl is a self involved cunt”…well that’s just obvious, when you’re in a family of self involved cunts, you need to be a self involved cunt, because otherwise you starve…despite your hired help feeding you, but you know what I mean, and that’s if your own parents only like you because you are an extension of themselves and can’t bother with you because they are too into themselves, you gotta do you…or some shit.

So I just see it more as a shameless plug to a brand she has obligations to because they paid her, and she’s attempting to be more creative than just posting the catalog pic, because Kendall Jenner is not just art people, but also an artist, or that’s what she’s like to believe because no one likes the reality that they are just a puppet, modern version of an Avon lady, peddling product to about 2 million half retards worldwide, in a country with 350 million people…

Calvin-Klein-Underwear-Spring-2016-Campaign01

She’s garbage…but that goes without saying..

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW