DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2016

08

Feb

Bella Thorne’s Braless I think of the Day

I doubt this 40 year old is Braless, 40 year old tits, when pretending to be 18, probably need support…

Whatever it is she’s doing, I think it’s safe to say that she is definitely working it and loving the attention she’s getting from all the pervert dudes who follow her every move – mainly on snapchat – hoping she’ll slip up and get overexcited by her fame and either send her audience,who when big enough feels invisible, trust me I know….or maybe my audience is just invisible…or more importantly, that she’ll slip up and send her boyfriend who she’s tonguing some pussy videos – that she accidentally pushes to her story…

Either way, people are fucking loving her…I don’t get it but I guess a hot redhead is like some rare thing, so rare it must be celebrated as most gingers make non-gingers want to throw the fuck up.

Here she is tonguing her bf video:

Here she is dancing…

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2016

08

Feb

“Celebs” Who Did Superbowl Things of the Day

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Despite Coldplay’s horrible British weirdness, The SuperBowl is the biggest sporting event in America, and there’s nothing more American than the entertainment industry, filled with fame whores and people they’ve made celebrities out of, you know the overly rich people, living the good life, the Glamourous life, the access to everything life, pretty much mocking the common man in his shitty debt filled life who obsesses over them and buys into the fantasy that is their absurdity….and excess..

So while you were watching a TV you financed, on cable bill you owe money on, being fed marketing messages by advertisers, making you want to buy things you don’t need, while eating shitty food that will lead to your premature death..

These bitches were naturally events, high profile – invite only events surrounding the Superbowl…

Here’s the highlights….

Ashley Greene…the girl who pretended to be a virgin despite being Florida trash who turned famous and we all know how that happens…

Adriana Lima creatively hiding her old, squared out, mom body…

Ambrosio was there too..

Chanel Iman in Very Little Clothing – because she’s a Lingerie Model People – Used to Nakedness – Stop Being So Uptight…Racists…

January Jones has a Hard Nipple….

Emanuelle Chriqui is an Old Canadian Jew…with Tits…

SI Model and Hooker – Sam Hoopes – WHo Looks Trashy and Beat the Fuck Up – with a Spry Tank on some Low Level stripper vibe – Doing it…

Karreuche Tran’s Side Tit

Jenny McCarthy Must Die…

Annalynne McCord’s Got it All Figured Out…

Hailey Baldwin – because her Uncle is really famous…

Genevieve Morton Lookin’ Good…

Remember the girl from the Blurred Lines Video – She still had tits – I know her face doesn’t look good -but those tits are tits!

Olivia Jordan is Great…

TO SEE ALL THE “celebs” doing Superbowl things CLICK HERE

Posted in:Events

2016

08

Feb

Olivia Rose for Jonathan Leder of the Day

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Olivia Rose is everything.

I know absolutely nothing about her, but one of my favorite photographers, who I like to think is an actual photographer, because he’s been doing this from long before instagram, getting hipster model chicks with bush naked, producing great pictures that speak to my soul and are so properly executed…an authetic..not an instagram filtering asshole with a million followers…

So I support everything he does…including but not limited to the models he selects that have historically been incredible..

He’s putting out a book on this Oliva Rose, who I’ve never heard of…but who exists and looks amazing..

Finally a solid set of tits to make that sour, bad attidude, famous for her tits, Emily Ratajkowski as irrelevant as she should be…who by the way Jonathan Leder shot before she was anything…because this dude is legit, the talent picking photographer you need to pay attention to…and the pics are fucking hot…

You see this is where Playboy should have gone instead of the non-nude nonsense…this is what the people want – and by people I mean me – which is convenient because I am me.

This girl is amazing…

PRE ORDER THE BOOK CLICK HERE

Posted in:Olivia Rose

2016

08

Feb

Salma Hayek’s T-Shirt of the Day

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This is great….I wish this was my shirt..I wish this was my design…such a silly idea…but when Salma Hayek wears it to the Hospital after hitting her head…shit’s done good, and the life of the viral T-shirt, that is really an awesome t-shirt happens…

That’s not to say if I did produce this shirt, an idea I’m sure every dude has had at least once over the last 20 years, that mine would be the one wearing it…but it is to say whoever made this shirt – is going to sell 1,000,000 dollars worth of them…

This is what she had to say:

I had to be rushed from set to the ER for a minor head injury. Unfortunately my wardrobe for the scene was completely inappropriate for the hospital. Thank you to doctors Foster and Ellspermann for taking such good care of me! And don’t worry it didn’t make me any crazier than I was!

Posted in:Salma Hayek|SFW

2016

08

Feb

Chloe Grace Moretz in a Bikini of the Day

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Chloe Grace Moretz is in Monkey Stance for the Year of the Monkey…she’s relevant like that…

I went to see Hai Caesar at an actual theatre this weekend, despite fearing public places for shootings and diseases from other people, I figured it was a good place to finger a 20 year old, not to mention to reconnect with humans to see what they find funny, entertaining and laugh at…

Because as a bitter, angry, miserable hater, everything I see that is popular makes me mad, and I think “how was that written”…or “How could this joke fly”…or “how did the writers allow this to happen”….

Before remembering – that I have no audience, so clearly, I have no idea what I’m talking about..

Anyway, I saw a trailer featuring this pudgy little 18 year old, probably shot when she was 17, in a bikini…as a Sorority sister who has decided that their Sorority needs Women Pride and throw parties despite it being a Frat thing…all while living next door to the worst fucking person in the world…with his throaty nasal laugh – Seth Rogan….and the people in the audience were roaring hysterical to the bad fucking low level vine style jokes…

Point being….when I see Chloe Grace…all I see is that fucking trailer replaying in my head reminding me of the caliber of actor she is on the cash grab…while seeing how overrated her sex appeal is…making me hate her.

Posted in:Chloe Grace Moretz|SFW

2016

08

Feb

Who Won for Best The Paparazzi Shoot of the Day

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Here’s a new feature I call posting a few pictures of idiots I don’t care about, even though I did love Heather Graham’s tits and pussy hair in Boogie Nights because I love big natural tits and pussy hair, something that I am glad the younger, lazy, feminist girls are into showing me, because it makes my sexting on Tinder far more rewarding in a world where I’ve spent the last 10 years dealing with baby bald pussy – thanks to Bros and Kardashians enforce it…when I just want bigger, thicker, pillow in a panty bush…I actually got in a fight with a feminist about her bush just the other day, she ended up blocking me, because I guess she felt like I was mocking her with my excitement of her hairiness, even though I was excited by her hairiness…

I digress…this feature will be a one off, and it’s an interactive, leave a comment, but you won’t since NO ONE Is out there…

What do you like better Heather Graham Old and in a Tight Purple Outfit Jogging on set…or Karina Smirnoff, not quite as good as the low quality Vodka, but some Dancing With the Stars chick…legitimately doing the cheesiest car wash ever, even though she’s rich and probably doesn’t even take her own tampons out of her vile dancing pussy….yet all of a sudden the girl with three full time cleaning ladies is washing a fucking car in short shorts…

To see the Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

OR:

Karina Smirnoff Washing Cars

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Verdict – they are both winners….because they aren’t street hookers

Posted in:Heather Graham|Karina Smirnoff

2016

08

Feb

Kristen Stewart’s Hottest Picture of the Day

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Kristen Stewart is the face of Chanel, because she’s famous as fuck actress thanks to Twilight. I guess that’s an audience I guess the brand is trying to reach, why the fuck else would they book Kristen Stewart for this….there’s nothing fashionable or glamourous or even hot about her….and outside of her movies, and really inside her movies also, she’s a homely lesbian hipster who doesn’t look like she showers or wears make-up…but does look like she smells and that she’s walking around looking medicated as fuck, unexcitable maybe even dopey like some kind of inbred with ceiling eyes playing with rocks in the corner of the playground…but she’s not inbred…her parents are Hollywood producers / directors / etc…which explains her career.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that this is the best picture I’ve ever seen of her…There’s something Romantic about this picture…I call it…blocking out most of her dumb looking face…

In other famous girls because they were cast at a young age is terribly successful teen fiction – Emma Watson the Harry Potter famous 14 year old the weirdest people in the world collectively fantastized about marrying while masturbating to her…was at some event in a white dress showing cleavage, something I’d dedicate a post to because that’s what I do here, I dedicate fucking posts to these idiots, they just don’t realize it because my dedications are usually perverted and mean spirited…which they deserve for being famous in the first pace….

TO SEE PICS OF HER AT SOME EVENT IN A DRESS WITH CLEAVAGE
CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kristen Stewart|SFW

2016

08

Feb

AnnaLynne McCord Nipple of the Day

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Some like to think that AnnaLynne McCord is low on the totem pole of relevance…in the “hollywood” industry….but the fact is that she’s not even on the Totem pole, hell she’s not even part of the tribe that built the fucking Totem pole, she’s more the kind of girl who rolls through and tries to sit in the face of the totem pole, you know see how deep she can get it to got…

She was on one show, once, that was a redux of a 90s show, in an era where people don’t know how to produce original content but rather relive old successes….without realizing those old successes only worked because it was pre-internet and network TV controlled what we watched….and don’t work now…because we have options…

Either way, she got paid enough to still be around – and in being around – she’s figuring out and navigating how to get talked about – as her management and agents aren’t going to bat for her, they’ve got other things going on….

Seriously, the actors 90210 the Next Generation – hoping it’d work like Drake’s Degrassi up in Canada….have all gone onto nothing more than low level fame whoring and what better way to do that than by showing nipple at an event.

TO SEE MORE PICS OF THIS OLD HAG AND OTHER HAGS AT THE SUPERBOWL CLICK HERE

Posted in:Annalynne McCord

2016

08

Feb

Carmen Electra is Working It of the Day

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Carmen Electra doesn’t realize that there comes in time in every farmer’s life where he has to take his old cow, or sow, or mare out back and put a bullet through her fucking head because she is no longer of use to him as she’s not producing and just wasting resources…and even if he still loves the beast so much he fucks it when no one is looking, even though it is half dead…it still needs to get done….

There are younger and hotter versions of her to pick-up her job where she left off…

She doesn’t understand, despite fucking countless athletes, that there is a time in their lives when they need to bow out of the game like he’s Peyton Manning and say – I peaked, it’s time I go enjoy my money and remember my Glory days as a star player, through the injuries I have and pain I feel while either opening up a car dealership by home, or working in the Football industry more behind the scenes….

She doesn’t understand, despite having fucked countless musicians, that even they have to stop the heroin that fuels them becausethey dont’ want to “David Bowie”….because they are old and their bodies can’t keep up…

She just keeps going and going well into her 40s…while no one still knows or understands what she ever did other than Playboy when Playboy could launch career for these glorified instagram models…

That said, she’s got a great body and who really cares what she does, I can ride this notalgia – I’d just want to wear a full body condom

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Carmen Electra|SFW

2016

08

Feb

Kendall’s Ass of the Day

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Kendall Jenner is double dipping in Love Magazine, maybe she’s like an Athlete who gets extra money from his Sponsors when he gets published in magazines or featured on TV shows, like he’s won some kind of award or some shit….because she’s giving Love Magazine, who I guess has some level of cool factor to a person like Kendall Jenner who has no concept of cool has…

These rich kids are so detached from reality…in their weird insular bullshit overrated lives filled with cheesy people who suck up to them and want to be famous like them….it’s weird..

Maybe the family is just on Love Magazine’s payroll, since they did some massively viral – possibly the “break the internet” fully nude Kim Kadashian photoshoot…that the public seems to forget they can see her at her prime naked getting fucked by a big black cock…because her getting naked – is hardly breaking anything except maybe the chair she is sitting on or anything her naked disgusting body touches…

Point being, she’s wearing her sponsor Calvin in the magazine, showing her non existent ass, because she’s uneventful, not that hot, but exists and people seem to like talking about her…despite being garbage…myself included…and I hate myself for that and more – stay tuned to find out…

Not too far behind Kendall is her friend and possible employee GIGI

TO SEE THOSE KIM K IN LOVE NAKED AS FUCK CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW