DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

06

Jul

Bella Thorne’s Seducing You of the Day

She knows exactly what she’s doing here…and you’re all falling for it. Idiots can’t control your animal instinct to want to get up inside a young as fuck girl, who wants you to want that…but who will never give you that, and if she did, you’d be breaking the law, but you’d think it was worth it, because there’s no way you’d ever say no to this, even if you know it’d be wronng to say yes…which is the problem with boners…

16 is legal in Canada and I don’t fuck with anyone under 18, they annoy me, but I guess if I wasn’t allowed to, or didn’t have the option to say I don’t want under 18 year olds…maybe I’d be as into this girl as you…

What it comes down to is that she wants this, and you’re falling for it…this is how she propels her career into her 20s…get the perverts now…and the rest will follow later..

I feel like I’ve already seen these pics before…btu whatever…you’re a creepy pervert…

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Nicki Minaj Nipple Slip of the Day

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Nicki Minaj is some doughy clown of a pop act, that is not hot, interesting, fun or compelling. She’s just the same trying to figure out what the people want puppet, who happens to exist, but who probably shouldn’t exist, it was just good timing…

She’s really just a one hit wonder who has managed to stick around, I guess thanks to social media and showing her tit on stage.

I am more interested in anything that doesn’t involve a girl in fishnet pantyshose looking like she’s vacuum wrapped…and disgusting..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Nicki Minaj

2015

06

Jul

The Women of ESPN’s Body Issue of the Day

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ESPN does a homoerotic issue every year, where they get a bunch of athletes naked, because in case you didn’t know, girl athletes, unless they play tennis and aren’t the big Venus…or surfing…are monsters…with clits bigger than your dick..which isn’t saying much..but it’s saying these sculpted bodies are terrifying..

I guess I just like my girls skinny from eating disorders, not skinny from low body fat due to massive muscle mass…to stay competitive monsters…But they technically have female reproductive organs, even though they seem like machines, so it’s not as gay as jerking off to an actual tranny, something I assume you do…..

I mean, I don’t really want to see any of these girls ride my face for hours because they have good cardio…and not just for fear of them rubbing off my face…

Here are the pics of girls…

VIA ESPN

Posted in:ESPN|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Jessica Simpson’s Helicopter Photoshoot for AMerica of the Day

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Jessica Simpson posted this picture for the Fourth of July, mocking the American Troops who have died for your freedom, by being a relatively beefy girl in a bathing suit, pretending to do what they do…or maybe I am just looking too much into this attempt at being a modern pin-up thanks to having the body of girl big enough to have been considered hot during the Great Depression, mainly because at her size it meant she could afford more than just dirt and cockroaches for dinner…so fancy…where as in this generation it means..you can afford fast food…how the times have changed…

Posted in:Jessica Simspon|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Elisabeth Olsen’s Panty Flash of the Day

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The wind was on our side…something that happens very rarely…hut when it does happen, it feels like the gods have spoke, and all the stars have aligned, because the natural elements of the Earth…meet the man-made fabrics of a specific skirt design, allowing us to see Olsen Twin sister heaven…

Unfortunately, Elisabeth Olsen was not on our side, because she wore panties…but it does remind me that panty flashes and hard nipples in white t-shirts during rain storms happen all the time…so get outside…if you’re not scared of the world because it is a horrible place, or because you are too lazy to leave your house because it gets in teh way of napping and not wearing pants.. like Me!

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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FOLLOW ME INTO THE DARKNESS ON SOCIAL MEDIA:

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Posted in:Elisabeth Olsen|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Chelsea Handler’s Fake Tits Waterski of the Day

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Show NSFW Content

Chelsea Handler is the fucking worst…but women liked her cunty brand of comedy, they thought it was funny, I just found it bitter that she never made it, not that I ever really listened to it, I didn’t have cable that her show was on, but I just naturally saw her as the attention seeking fame whore who tried to be an actor, and chose comedy instead, because acting didn’t work for her, and girl comedy is just easy to pull off…and requires very little skill especially when you haver writers…

So this 50 year old, constant breast implant flashing, makes sense to me, now that she has no show, the one thing she was defined by…because her ego got inflated and she believed she would be the next Letterman..when really she was just a rude bitch…rather than an intelligent voice..up on some Jimmy Fallon low brow shit…

So this is her stance, her platform, all she’s got left…and it’s too bad it’s boring as fuck…you know the spirit is there…but the execution is just garbage…I am sure there will be more to come…even if this shouldn’t make anyone cum.

‘

Posted in:Chelsea Handler|NSFW

2015

06

Jul

MILF Doutzen Kroes Does Instagram of the Daay

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Ex Victoria’s Secret model…Doutzen Kroes…posted some pictures of her partying like a slut…flashing her body…like a slut…in a club…like she was one of the groupies throwing her panties on Doutzen’s Husband when he DJs in Ibiza and he pulls them all backstage, now that his bitch is some old, tired, ex VS model, who has served her purpose and made him kids, allowing him to go back to fucking new models, like he was the casting Director at VS, now that this one is old and forgotten…because there will always be new, fresh, exciting pussy…and I guess Doutzen Kroes is having a hard time accepting that in this “LOOK AT ME”…party slutting..that I appreciate…but I guess I’m not her kid googling my mom at pre-school…

It all seems desperate, the best kind of desperate…keep up the good work.

Posted in:Doutzen Kroes|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Kendall Jenner’s Coffee Shot of the Day

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Kendall Jenner stole the obvious joke when posting this picture of her in a see through shirt, covering her hooker kardashian nipple, that isn’t really her fault for doing, she can’t really help the brain washing her mother raised her with, it’s not like she’s allowed to socialize with normal people, or can related to normal people, living her secluded, surrounded by her shitty family existence…something that will probably end badly in the next 20 years…but in the mean time, involve her posting pis of her coffee cup..in the most slutty and subtle of ways….

She’s a Kardashian, this isn’t porn, so I guess selling Kim out for the sex tape has allowed the rest of the family to not need to whore themselves unless they really want to, like a single mother stripping to save college money for their kid, that she ends up spending on meth, so the kid can go onto do the same thing her whore mother did…

And so the cycle continues…

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW

2015

06

Jul

Taylor Swift’s Volleyball Serve at her Mansion of the Day

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Taylor Swift had some stupid fourth of July party at her ocean front East coast mansion, where a bunch of idiots attended, because she’s Taylor Swift, top of the charts star who you can’t say no to, especcially when you’re Gigi Hadid trying so hard to be as big as the Kardashians, aiming for the follower spillover share-for-share instagram plug while Taylor wants to seem like she has friends, and Martha Hunt, tags along because that’s what hired barbie dolls do…and I guess the real question is how much cocaine was there…or how much of any drugs were there…kids these days love fucking drugs…Molly at the ocean…but more importantly…how many orgasms did sex addicted, masked by love story, Taylor Swift had…including but not limited to ones from her cake cutting brother…

Rich people are so weird.

Posted in:SFW|Taylor Swift

2015

06

Jul

Miley Cyrus Does Fourth of July of the Day

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Miley Cyrus is such a fucking phoney…she’s spend years fucking around on TUMBLR as she wasn’t allowed to leave her house during the Hannah Montana formative years, where her record label and team created this character, that is clearly a fucking joke, and clearly fading fast, because people see through bullshit lies and a lack of authenticity, but I guess since the beginning of the entertainment industry, authenticity has always been replaced with Marketability and how to maximize as much money as possible, without the retard public buying the bullshit to realize…so throw diversions at them, like fingering a model behind a truck and other strategic moves…and the whole thing is pretty dumb, and getting harder and harder to notice…since we’ve seen her do everything and we’re ready to move onto the next one in line…. she’s over….I mean would be over if the general public wasn’t as lame as her.

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|SFW