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2015

30

Jun

Gigi Hadid Vogue Brasil of the Day

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I don’t think Gigi Hadid gets enough press for being an average at best instagram model rich kid who has some pretty solid family connections thanks to being rich from Los Angeles…and more importantly Arab…

I mean, I don’t think she gets enough media, covers, magazines, campaigns at all…

It’s like people don’t even notice her, or talk about her like she matters, or is talented nearly enough….

So why do one post on her posing awkwardly in bikinis in one day…when you can do 2….

I guess what I am saying is that as a bratty Princess, nothing is good enough for this twat…and her PR team just keep on pushing hoping one day she’ll be as relevant as a Kardashian…

YOu know, set her up to do what Kim did to Paris…only To Kendall and Kylie…because everyone watches their bullshit instagram existence…and by everyone I mean teen girls and a few creepy perverts who like bikini models….who read this shit…

MOre

Posted in:Gigi Hadid|SFW

2015

30

Jun

Jewel Kilcher in a Bikini of the Day

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I once made an experiemental video set to a Jewel Song..

It was starring a couple of potatoes doing some stop motion weirdness, because I guess before the internet I was onto the whole “do weird things and call it art because idiots will buy anything if marketed properly”….a knowledge I’ve had forever, but don’t do anything about, because marketing is a lot of work and I prefer drinking, I would require some kind of manager but that would require talking to someone….which I hate doing…I’d rather just sit her knowing it’s easy to troll the world than troll the world…

I guess I was a visionary, because back then Jewel just happened, and now she’s turned into a potato…a bikini wearing potato…

Hey Miss Cleo..I’m the fucking psychic network..if I had a VHS player I’d have the proof…

I guess the most exciting thing about Jewel is her livijng in her car lie…she probably slept in her car once, before sleeping on anyone who would listen to her Alaskan folk music…that has now brought her to this…bikini wearing potato…20 years later..

Posted in:Jewel Kilcher|SFW

2015

30

Jun

Anna Herrin is Alright of the Day

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A video posted by Anna Herrin (@annaherrin) on

Here name is Anna Herrin…she’s som LA catalog model….who does a lot of eCommerce shit…but I guess who is quirky and silly…based on the above video…and I ghess the below video because getting half naked isn’t enough to differentiate yourself from all the other hot chicks on instagram with great bodies who don’t fucking matter…cuz everyone is willing to get naked…and everyone who is decent looking at best is willing to try to be a model…in fact they feel entitled and think they deserve to be a model..

I come from an era where models were pulled out of grocery stores and didn’t know their tall lanky and insecure look was marketable…where the fame whore sluts that instagram now gives a platform to ended up in porn and Playboy…

It’s all juste fucking bullshit noise, but she’s hot enough, as are 5,000,000 other instagram members…making her pretty fucking obsolete in the grand scheme of the modeling industry…

But at least she’s quirky..that’s her edge…I’m onto you ANna Herrin…unfortunately…I am not inside you.

A video posted by Anna Herrin (@annaherrin) on

Posted in:Anna Herrin|SFW

2015

30

Jun

Top 20 Comedown Pics from Glastonbury in the History of Comedown Pics of the Day

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So this post was on my Facebook feed, because that’s what Buzzfeed does, they rape me from my social media…thanks to the general public being fucking idiots…which brings up my next point…and that is that as much as I hate clickbait and the people who share it…it is representative of humanity…and thus reminds me that I hate humanity…and is part of the reason why I find music festivals terrifying and I want nothing to do with them…even though I know they are full of young sluts on MDMA who will get naked, and do puppet shows with their vaginas if approached properly..my favortie…but my dislike for Music festivals..and really getting off my couch in general…because society is horrible…is stronger than my love for Vagina puppet shows…

Well..that doesn’t change the fact that it is the season of music festivals, there is one every week in any city you are in, and they involve tents, people camping despite the invention of hotels and beds, all sitting in a field getting fucked up and wandering around like this was the 60s an they were in Woordstock…when in reality…we arne’t in Woodstock..this is the internet generation, you’re just there for a fucking selfie asshole…

Anyway, the Sunday Night / Monday Morning…after the festival fetsitivies are over…attrack the real beat up, broken down, disgusting, smelly, idiots who participate in these mass congregations….and it makes for some interesting pictures…that if I was that interested in, I’d dig deeper to find actual good pics of the comedown…

Posted in:Photos

2015

30

Jun

Valeriya by Jean Pierrot for Treats! of the Day

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I don’t know if I already posted these pics of some model named Valeriya by a photographer named PIEROT , who I am going to assume is from france, and thus very good at taking semi erotic photography, because French people despite being exposed to so many tits, have produced some of the greatest erotica in the world, because I guess it ain’t a thing to them, but really it ain’t a thing to any photographer, they’re all a bunch of perverts..

I don’t anything about the model Valeriya, but assume she’s ethnic..but still has a work visa because if you’re a titty model…it is easy to get a work visa…something More Mexicans should look into doing…because it must be a loop hole, why else would all these immigrants exist..

Unless she’s actually just Valerie from the Valley, with two white, middle management parents, who drive a Jeep Cherokee…but who got nowhere as Valerie from the valley, other than some porn offers, because she was willing to show her tits and there was a porn shoot going on in a house next door….while changing her name to Valeriya …all of a sudden made the nudes more artistic….it’s just that easy…

Posted in:Jean Pierrot|NSFW

2015

30

Jun

Selena Gomez Sucking Ice Cream of the Day

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There used to be a period in my life of lonely and depressive…where I wasn’t sexting girls…because I didn’t have a cell phone…and I hated my obese Ice Cream eating wife, where we’d go out to get her Ice Cream…and I would be able to finally get a taste of erotica….as I watched young college girls…sucking their cone like it was the best thing they every had in their mouth…probably because eating Ice Cream was off diet and so naughty…that it was like forbidden fruit cheating that exhilarated them right down into the depths of their throbbing pussies…at least that is what I would think…as they deep throated the shit…imagining it was my dick…because I knew as soon as my wife got her triple scoop…ice cream would be ruined for me as it dripped down her face and she emotional sucked it fucking down like you’d expect a 300 pound woman to eat her ice cream…

Selena Gomez…is touching on both those emotions..eroticism….and disgust…and with one ice cream cone..

Posted in:Selena Gomez|SFW

2015

30

Jun

Kaley Cuoco, Amy Davidsonm & Lacey Chabert in Bikinis of the Day

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I guess the general public like mindless sitcoms…unless Big Bang Theory is actually interesting comedy..I’ve never watched a full episode, but people seem to fucking love it, which makes me assume it isn’t actually good, it is just designed to talk to the masses at a basic levle so that they can trap in fans and make Kaley Cuoco stupid rich, when actual talent is not able to get work…..

I just assumed it was Friends, for the new generation, formulaic and based on nerd shit, and nerds love nerd shit, even the “hot”nerd girl they market as accessible…

Well, she’s been in a bikini…celebrating god knows what…witch a couple of old friends like her co-star on 8 Simple Rules, with the red hair, who was on set when John Ritter died..and Lacey Chabert, another nerd favorite…making this perfect for anyone over 35…because who the fuck are these girls…who cares they are old in bikinis…and there is comedy in that.

Here’s her 8 Simple Ruiles co-star no one remembers milking their friendship…by posting yoga pics…in a bikini…because people love bikinis..

Posted in:Kaley Cuoco|SFW

2015

30

Jun

GIgi Hadid Bathing Suit Model of the Day

I find the most compelling part of this campaign no the rich kid from Instagram in a bikini for a brand, because she’s a fashion model now…but rather that they call her GIGI INC….assuming that her little business, that I am sure is incorporated for tax purposes, and probably called Gigi Inc, because the name Gigi, as pornographic or stripping slut as it sounds, is pretty obnoxious in and of itself…you know it just screams “I’m a pretentious rich slut”…..

The reason I find GIgi Inc funny as a concept, is because of the nepotism and resources of her dad and his managment team, that I assume is pushsing this career forward, since it makes him look like less of a predator when he calls meetings with young models for sex, because her, in and of herself, is hardly that interesting…yet for some reason, a reason I call brands being lazy, the media being lazy, and the world following whatever they are told to follow…she’s one of the most relevant models right now…and based on her pics…I find it weird…

If she wasn’t rich and connected, I think she’d be working at Starbucks, but as it is now, she wouldn’t be able to handle an hour of actual work…she’s that kind of princes…the worst kind…

Posted in:Gigi Hadid|SFW

2015

30

Jun

Izabel Goulart Fitness Erotica of the Day

A video posted by Izabel Goulart (@iza_goulart) on

I figure since I posted that dyke Danica Patrick doing yoga 2 minutes ago, I might as well balance that out, by posting lingerie model, Izabel Goulart, who is long, skinny and wearing a slutty little outfit, to add a bit of feminitity to the site…even though Izabel Goulart is from Brazil, and based on nationwide statistics on Brazilian women over 5 foot 10,, she may have a dick…it’s a Brazilian tranny thing…

I don’t really have more to say about this, other than these types of videos make jerking off to fitness easier than doing it at they gym, which I guess is the samething Youtube does for pedophiles, who have hours of kids birthday parties an selfie dance videos they can watch…instead of going out and doing it…only less fucked up, because Izabel Goulart is like 100 years old in model years….and getting turned on by her fitness videos, is pretty much her objective…since it’s 15 seconds long and offers very little practical fitness tips…so stare at her stong, fit, amazing.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart|SFW

2015

30

Jun

Danica Patrick Does Yoga of the Day

Here’s a little moment of zen with Nascar driver Danica Patrick…who I assume you all masturabate to…because you are white trash and fucking love Nascar…because Nascar is American….like the confederate flag…you racist redneck fucks…

I have been to a Nascar race once..I don’t really remember it thanks to the open bar in the booth I scammed myself into ..but I know one thing…and that thing is that Danica Patrick wasn’t there, being the “girl racer”…so that she could be hired as a model…because she’s not quite hot enough to be a model..but when she’s attached to race car driving she is…

I guess what I am trying to say is that, based on her yoga…she’d probably be better used in sex videos….but then again, what girl isn’t…

Posted in:Danica Patrick|SFW