DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

25

Jun

Jennifer Lawrence is Silly of the Day

I used to find Jennifer Lawrence pretty fucking irritating…she was always being so silly and seemingly accessible and likeable…falling all over herself, while campaigning for her Oscars…so many Oscars..she’s nominated every year…and no one really knows why…

But then her nude pics came out, her young tits were great, her body hot, and her willingness to get naked, like pretty much everyone with a phone, worked for me….

So now, she can do no wrong…even when she’s backed to her old tricks of chopstick tusks…for the paparazzi…because she’s possibly drunk, and broken up from that weirdo in Coldplay she was dating…

I heard she was filming in montreal…but she didn’t hit me up…breaking my heart with the rejection I deserve…so I guess I should go back to hating her…but those nudes..were just so unexpected and good…I’m a fan for life now.

Posted in:Jennifer Lawrence|SFW

2015

25

Jun

Bella Thorne’s Fetish Quote of the Day

No Comments »

Bella Thorne is making the rounds right now, mainly because she’s a 17 year old Disney star and at 17, all these Disney Stars come out of the woodwork and start slutting themselves ou tto the media HARD….I assume someone at the Disney team tell them to do this, because like clockwork, this just keeps happening, Disney Star after Disney Star…

I guess they know creepy dads and perverts watch them and want them and the best scandal is one where they innocently show off their hormones-in-the-food booties..

Their mom’s cultivated them aggressively to be this star, and they won’t let it go to waste….not now, not after they’ve gone this far as a family..

That said, INTOUCH Weekly did an interview with her and this was the quote you can masturabte to :

My favorite thing to do is sit in my bed with my mom

Because if you know anything about stage moms, they’ve done a great job brainwashing their kids to be performers…willing to do anything they can to make it…

Here’s her dance video..

A video posted by BELLA (@bellathorne) on Jun 25, 2015 at 4:02am PDT

Here are some pics of her from social media…

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2015

25

Jun

Lady Gaga’s Piano Erotica of the DAy

No Comments »

Show NSFW Content

What does the world need less of?

Not carbon footprint, waste, global warming, use of oil….racism, confederate flags, tansfats and corn syrup leading to obesity….STDs…

Not big business controlling our consumption, conspiracy theories, or the government controlling us by keeping us broke, sick and tired…we don’t need less feminsts, trans olympians…or Kardashians and tabloid fodder as a whole…

The world is a horrible meaningless place filled with shit, shitty people, and a horrible infrastructure….but all that’s fine…

As far as I’m concerned, what the world needs less of is Lady Gaga Spread eagled on social media…that is what the world needs less of, so I’ll just draw more attention to it…

Here’s her tit getting pizza the other day..no one cares…

Posted in:Lady Gaga|NSFW

2015

25

Jun

Hot Bikini Brand’s Video of the Day

No Comments »

Show NSFW Content

I guess shemademe is a bikini line, or a lingerie line, out of Australia, the land of the hottest, most fun, drunk and party girls built for the beach…not that these models are Australian, but they are amazing, and the guys shooting them are doing a pretty good job making me want to both endorse this brand, and be their assistant, getting them coffee, just to be invited on set one day to watch this magic, assuming I would ever work for someone else, or that I would leave my couch, I mean this isn’t that good…but it’s better than most and that should count for something…

I guess what I’m trying to say is that this brand makes me horny…and as an impotent man, that is both frustrating….and amazing…because I’m also a desensitized man who’s tried to masturbate to some of the darkest of porn, only to realize a few years ago that porn sucks, but fashion is everything, like this kind of fashion and its old school erotica vibe…

Is this Playboy in the 70s? Or a brand…I don’t know…

Posted in:NSFW|Videos

2015

25

Jun

Rose McGowan and a Ridiculous Publicity Stunt of the DAy

No Comments »

The Rumor is that Rose McGowan was objectified by Adam Sandler’s casting team for one of his shitty fucking movies that makes him too much money based on his talent alone…

They specifically told her to wear a cleavage shirt, a note probably written by her agent in hopes she’d finally get work and make him money…

She exposed him, while thinking she was exposing Adam Sandler…for being a womanizing prick, you can assume he is…you know seeing as he has the mental capacity of a 14 year old Jewish boy who loves basketball…and now her agent fired her..

For those of you who don’t know, Rose McGowan in the early 2000s, used her tits to get famous…

All this to say, hollywood loves whores, so if you want to be in hollywood, you have to be a whore, and when you’ve made it in hollywood and don’t have to be a whore anymore, you don’t need to take a higher than thou stance and ruin it for all the up and coming whores…

It is a vapid, empty, money grubbing place…where the men get fake tans and botox and the women like their money…

Anyone involved in the industry is a fucked up pervert weirdo….so asking for cleavage, is probably more a testament of her agent’s opinion of her talent…and not so much Adam Sandler’s needs, as many people have already seen her tits…

All this to say, I like Rose McGowan….and hate Adam Sandler, so Team #Rose, but this is an idiotic story with no real point proved…even though she’s not a fan of me…

Posted in:Rose McGowan|SFW

2015

25

Jun

Charlotte McKinney’s Huge Tits and Shitty Face in MensHealth of the Day

No Comments »

This is the cheesiest shoot I’ve seen in a long time…it’s for Men’s Health magazine, not necessarily a magazine known for their artistic creative direction, you know it’s not the Vogue for men, where you’d expect anything deeper or more interesting than a girl in a bikini, that they throw some Dollar Tree props at to distract from her average face, you know figuring people only care about her tits, cuz the rest of her is pretty broken down, so put her in a bikini, it’s good enough….

I’ve seen better concepts on instagram with nobodies, which Charlotte McKinney is, an instagram nobody, who just scammed her way on TV, and will fade out into obscurity, but not before bedding the right rich guy who love big nobody tits…

I’m not a fan of Florida trash, rich or not…I’m also not a fan of a girl getting on TV, without paying any dues, other than fucking the right exec or his friend…

Charlotte McKinney makes no sense, and either do these pics..

Posted in:Charlotte McKinney|SFW

2015

25

Jun

Nina Agdal in Some Bullshit Magazine of the Day

No Comments »

I think Nina Agdal is garbage. I actually hate that I know who Nina Agdal is…I feel like she is so insignificant in the world of modeling and acting and celebrity…that there are countless hotter girls to post, but I’m too lazy to find them, and this shit just comes to my inbox….so I take what I can get, even bottom feeding garbage…that I guess is on some promotional campaign for herself because she realizes that at 30, she’s done very little and it’s time to figure it out so that she has a future more substantial than marrying some rich guy…but I doubt that she cares about a future more substantial than marrying a rich guy…she just knows she has to pretend she does to get the rich guy…you know the whole “I don’t care that he’s rich, I didn’t know he was rich when we met, he just happened to be rich and I’d date him if he was poor”…line these girls use…but don’t mean…because #hookers.

Posted in:Nina Agdal|SFW

2015

25

Jun

Samantha Hoopes Demonstrating the Low Standard of the Day

No Comments »

Samantha Hoopes has a pretty rugged looking face…and really body…but she’s one of Sports Illustrated’s champion bikini models, because I guess Sports Illustrated caters to white trash middle americans with no real taste in women, but who know one thing, and that thing is “TITS”…because this face is so beat the fuck up with injections, fillers and botox, that Samantha Hoopes looks like a fucking sex doll, and I guess she probably is one, to the right rich guy, it’s not like these Sports Illustrated bitches make any money, they just use the platform to bed athletes…obviously..

The funny thing is I think she says she’s 24 years old…I know 35 year old gutter porn chicks who look more wholesome and delicate than this…and those girls do facial abuse porn…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Here she is in a bikini Photo CLIKC HERE

Posted in:Samantha Hoopes|SFW

2015

25

Jun

Amanda Seyfried is the New Lindsay Lohan of the Day

No Comments »

Amanda Seyfried is the new Lindsay Lohan, but not really that new, she’s been around for a while and is pretty old or really Lindsay Lohan, because I am sure Seyfried hates being called Lohan, an who really cares what Lohan hates being called, because Lohan doesn’t matter, even though to me she’ll always matter, but Seyfried was in Mean Girls with Lohan and has since gone on to steal all of Lohan’s movie roles….because Lohan is a fucking crackhead…in a bikini…in these pics…

The fact is, Seyfried is a better actress, has a better career, and is hotter than Lohan, but I am still a Lohan believer, and everytime I see Seyfried done up at an event promoting a movie she’s in….I think “That should be Lohan”…maybe I hate Seyfriend because she fucks the Mac Guy…but that’s probably not the issue, seeing as I never care about what girls put in their vaginas, as long as I get to stare at their tits…in pics, videos or occassionally in person…

Either way, nice cornrows…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Amanda Seyfried|SFW

2015

25

Jun

Chelsea Handler’s Bath Time of the Day

No Comments »

Chelsea Handler is an attention seeking comedian, who’s best joke is her mocking attention seeking fame whores, by being one…

It’s the kind of Parody that people like Perez Hilton did, yes I just referenced Perez Hilton, he’s on Chelsea Handler’s level of importance, a celebrity blogger who was so obsessed with being a celebrity that he hated celebrities, only to become a celebrity, who is now doing stage shows as an actor, as life has a funny way of working out for people…who aren’t me…

This hustle worked for her years ago, many years ago, and is the reason she had a career, but instead of doing it behind closed doors like when she was cute, now she’s doing it publicly…because it makes more noise I guess…

So here she is taking a bath, even though she can’t wash the filth off her, that she’s in her blood stream….but some people, mainly inbred farmers find washing pigs erotic…so here..

Posted in:Chelsea Handler|SFW