DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

17

Jul

Lindsay Lohan’s Bikini Selife of the Day

Lindsay Lohan released this Lindsay Lohan Bikini Selfie on her Instagram because the paparazzi don’t fight to get pics of her anymore, so she figures she’ll just self promote the shit and get the same level of feedback and attention from her audience directly…

Even if that isn’t “real” celebrity, or fame, or relevance, she’s still Lindsay Lohan and she’s still worth looking at in a bikini…showing off her tits…

I think people from all walks of life can embrace these for what they are…a bikini selfie and not bother worrying about anything else…whether she’s Lindsay Lohan today and not Lindsay Lohan 5 years ago, when I would probably masturbate to this…she’s still tits bent over in a bikini posted to her account for attention…and I like that behavior always…

TO SEE SOME PAPARAZZI BIKINI PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan

2014

17

Jul

Kim Kardashian Tanning in a Bikini of the Day

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Appreantly KIM KARDASHIAN WAS IN A BIKINI AND MY FRIENDS DID A TOP 10 LIST ON IT

I am a firm believer that the only thing good that Kim Kardashian has ever done is her DISGUSTING YET AMAZING SEX TAPE …

Not because she’s a good fuck, or because I want to watch her fuck and not even because she made me money, making us indirect business partners….but because she leveraged a porno career and went mainstream thanks to having all the pieces in place…and now girls still feel like filming themselves fuck isn’t a big deal…and more importantly, that it could even make them famous like Kim, with a Rapper Boyfriend and hundreds of millions of dollars….and I can’t see how that ideal going mainstream is a bad thing….

What I can see as a bad thing is everything else that she represents. I think her sticking to porn would have been more honest, honourable and endearing….

But now she’s just a tabloid, paparazzi trash that sold her soul for money and fame, and I guess when you have no substance, money and fame is a good thing…

Either way, fat ass in a bikini is jokes.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS AND THE TOP 10 LIST CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kim Kardashian

2014

17

Jul

Valeriya Planidina by Andrew Kuykendall of the Day

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I don’t know anything about this model Valeriya Planidina. I just know she’s got the hipster look that I like and that a friend of the site ANDREW KUYKENDALL shot and when I came across them, I figured I’d post them, because I think Andrew is taking some of the more interesting nude fashion pics around, and more importantly, I want to have Valeriya Planidina’s babies…all over my face…seriously…she’s awesome.

I am sure you’ll be seeing a lot more from Andrew Kuykendall in the years to come…and you’ll be happy…because of all the hot model tits you’ll get to see…

Posted in:Andrew Kuykendall|Valeriya Planidina

2014

17

Jul

Genevieve Morton is Turning Up the Heat of the Day

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Genevieve Morton makes me laugh.

I get that guys think she’s awesome because they read Sports Illustrated and Sports Illustrated told them to. I get that she’s a better looking version of Kate Upton, which isn’t really saying much…other than fat blonde
chicks can get famous. I get that she might be coming to terms with her fleeting celebrity, you know it’s barely fucking there so she might as well push it as hard as she can. In doing that she’s posted and released her nipples in at least 2-3 photoshoots the last month. It’s like after a decade of this shit, she’s finally committed to making it work…and I guess I support it, only because I like desperation. I also like gold diggers and opportunists…who are just trying to get by using their tits…

Her dream is to be a comedic actress in movies…my dream for her is to watch her eat her way out of an all you can eat buffet…

Here are some instagram pics of her reaching for attention – tits get hits – let’s hope this time around it sticks – kind of shit…

The formula…so easy.

Posted in:Genevieve Morton

2014

17

Jul

Maria Sharapova Working Out of the Day

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Want to know what would make these Maria Sharapova workout pics better….if she was half naked and taking fitness way less seriously. I get it, she’s on some Grand Slam Tennis winning streak that is making her a lot of money and proving that she’s the beast player that she’s always been, you know in “I still got it” kind of way…but I always found her hot, I have a thing for the skinny blonde tennis girls who grunt when they hit balls in the most sexual and even violent ways….but I would like her to take some workout tips from these instagram models…who pretend to be fitness girls…It’s like poke your booty out…grab your angles and hashtag #fit #fitspo #fitness #yogapants #booty #shorts #fitlife and whatever else these twats do to get famous, because their fitness pics are better than an actual athletes and that should change….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Maria Sharapova

2014

17

Jul

Behati Prinsloo for Victoria’s Secret of the DAy

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There are a few things I don’t like in life….and three of those things happen to be in these pics:

1- Victoria’s Secret…because they exploit third world countries to make profit margin on shitty product for white people that they can in turn pay models too much money to be part of…giving models inflated egos about their worth and celebrity….

2- Catalog bikini pics because they lack any sort of story, purpose, creativity, or really substance. They are boring and a misuse of a high budget, good photographer and established model.

3- Adam Levine. Who sticks his dick in this shit…

But I’m still posting it – because half naked girls are half naked girls…even when they get paid millions for this and have horrible taste in men…

I can’t really Blame her, she’s from another country, and probably thinks Adam Levine is awesome because compared to the popstars back home, he is…

I mean she can’t be as picky or hateful as us, she’s just happy to be out of the hell she was living…and probably gets as pumped about a pair of Levis Jeans or Nikes…

Plus he’s rich, and thus good to make babies with…

I get it….but I don’t like it…

Posted in:Behati Prinsloo

2014

17

Jul

Amanda Seyfried’s Hot Face of the Day

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Mert & Marcus are the photographers who shot Amanda Seyfried for something too fancy for me called Cle de Peau …..I am assuming it is make-up, but I don’t really give a fuck. What I am interested in, is how fucking amazing they made this girls face look. I mean if she was actually this pretty, I wonder why it doesn’t translate in anything that she does…it’s like she’s got no self esteem, despite her millions…or maybe she has too much self esteem…I don’t know what being an unshowered, unkept, lazy bitch for the paparazzi means..It’s either “I’m so hot, I don’t need to get made up…or I hate myself and I’m a slob”…and based on the fact that she fucks Justin Long…when she could fuck anyone…even if he’s a dot com billionaire thanks to being paid in Apple stock for being the Mac Guy…she can fuck anyone who isn’t Justin Long…making me think…he’s more of a hate herself than love herself too much to bother…

Either, she looks like this..and I love it…and I can’t even see her big tits on her little frame…so that means she’s pretty fucking good, because I love big tits on a small frame and have liked monsters because of it, but this face could have no tits, it could be in a box in my basement, and I’d still want to stare at it…but maybe that’s because I have other decapitation issues to deal with….

Either way, good face.

Posted in:Amanda Seyfried

2014

17

Jul

Trying to Look Up Jessica Biel’s Pajama Dress of the Day

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Here is Jessica Biel…the girl who found the man who I assume she was a fan of. You know the kind of young starlet who got into acting because she learned how to masturbate watching Mickey Mouse club, you know just by sliding her hands in her panties while reading one of those teen beat mags…waiting for it to start to tickle….leading her to LA to hunt the motherfucker down, trapping him, letting him do whatever the fuck he wanted while touring, showing him she’d always be there for him, even when he fucked up along the way, forcing him to marry her, leaving him with no option because she’s been so cool along the way and no other chick would put up with that, or have what they have, leaving her to no need to work her shitty movies, so she can focus on her pit bulls, her fitness, and spending motherfucker’s money in her old lady pajama style dress I am trying to look up…

If it works for them, it works for me, but I prefer divorcees who failed at the whole marriage thing…they are far more fun to have sex with than those in lockdown…because they take far less work to convince…but I’ll still try to stare at any panties I can. That’s my commitment to panties.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Biel

2014

17

Jul

Selena Gomez Hiding her Implants of the Day

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Everyone has been so into Selena Gomez and her push up bras that could possibly be breast implants…they are buying into her attention seeking story that she’s playing up for the paparazzi…in what I like to call a diversion from the actual surgery she probably had…labia reduction…or maybe it was a sex change…or maybe she didn’t have surgery at all, she just likes people talking about her…

I just know she’s probably not wearing a bra here….and her tits don’t look as fake as they should be….so if she did get fake tits…it was probably the model size fake tits that don’t even count as fake tits since they don’t matter enough and aren’t loud enough…

Either way, she’s looking less bloated on LUPUS steroids than normal, I dig whatever is going on here as much as you can dig a sloppy body that bangs Bieber on the regular…which is actually more than I’d expect it to be …I blame the Mexican connection.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Selena Gomez

2014

17

Jul

Nicole Scherzinger Twerk of the Day

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If you want to stay relevant, even when you’re old and washed up, as J.Lo has proved before this Nicole Scherzinger chick…you twerk….and I watch…because a shaking and gyrating ass is a happy ass – or at least a happy me….which is really all I care about, even though Nicole Scherzinger can’t make me happy…nothing can…it fucks up my depression…

Posted in:Nicole Scherzinger