I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2012

23

Oct

Miley Cyrus Showing Leg in a Leopard Skirt with her Fiance of the Day


If I could learn one lesson from my travels through Miami International airport in recent hours, it is that weddings…or the people who have destination weddings, are the worst kind of white trash around….I am talking under 25 year old fat girls drinking cocktails and eating deep friend appetizers in a TGI Fridays as their neck fat jiggles and they brag about how hard they are gonna fuck in efforts to get knocked up on this magical adventure in paradise…or whatever the fuck I just witnessed….

Marriage is for idiots. It is for trash. It is for 9-5 workings, suburban dwelling trash who want to pump out kids and live the miserable life their mothers and fathers had….because they just don’t have other options in their town of 5000 people….

Marriage, when it comes to Miley…is a joke…like it is whenever a 20 year old says she’s engaged…it is part of a master marketing plan that she may actually believe she’s engaged in….cuz this robot…is such a fucking robot…she doesn’t know what is real….but I know one thing that is real…and that is how bad I want to have zoo-like sex with her while looking at her leg peak through her wild and crazy animal print dress…even when it comes with product placement you know this robot is being paid to wear….

There’s just something about Miley that makes me want to cum in her as much as I want to punch her in the face…not that I’d ever hit a woman…it was figurative not literal people….I would only hit Miley if I was drunk and confused this dyke haircut for some genderless hipster staging a home invasion…and I had to fight for survival….not that that would ever happen…Miley doesn’t know what Canada is. She’s educated like that.

I can’t believe I just wrote a fucking novel set to pics of Miley taking a walk. There is something wrong with me.


TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
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Posted in:Miley Cyrus

2012

23

Oct

Victoria Silvstedt Devil Hooker in Bikini for Twitter of the Day

These are a week old, but in my defense…I don’t give a fuck about Victoria Silvstedt or her shameless self promotion. I have never been a fan of her and the last 2 decades she’s been doing the exact same thing. She lacks creativity and the peak wasn’t her 1990s Playboy stint…it was public sex with a billionaire…that lead to her trying to sue me for posting the fucking pics…like an unappreciative cunt who was getting exactly what her hooker, fake tit, fake hair, really tight body for a 45 year old, cuz that body is why she gets paid by her billionaire boyfriend/employer/cuz he has a wife at home….

Sometimes, the bikini pics get the best of me and I am forced to post them even when the girl in them is likely the devil….and most definitely a very high paid escort.

Posted in:Victoria Silvstedt

2012

23

Oct

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

Marie-Eve here.

The thing about drinking on a Monday night it that Monday then becomes a 2nd Friday and by the time it’s Wednesday it actually feels like Sunday again. Thursday becomes your second Monday and is spent trying to catch to up on just enough work so that you won’t lose your job and by the time Friday comes it’s time to do it all over again.

It sends you up to this whole new level of trashing yourself and if you’re not careful your life becomes a rollercoaster of headaches, nausea, no money and depression that is difficult to get off.

And if you know what’s good for yourself you will take my advice when I say don’t be like me.

I built this Morning Hangover especially for you.

Rope Swing FAIL Starts Tuesday Morning Off – VIDEO
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WTF Photo of the Day
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Motorcross Crash Insanity Makes Me Glad I Have Canadian Health Insurance – VIDEO
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Taylor Redford is a Downhome Texas Hottie (SEMI NSFW)
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Jo Garcia is a Super Sexy Cybergirl (SEMI NSFW)
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The Bioshock Infinite Trailer is Basically Insanely Awesome – VIDEO
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The 25 Funniest Presidential Election GIFs (So Far)
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Free Web Cam Girl Shows is the Best Gift I Can Give You Today (NSFW)
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This Hottie Knows How to Have Fun on Her Own (NSFW)
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And THATS Why You Shouldn’t Drink Too Many Energy Drinks. Jesus
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Jen Wilburn is a Trashy Blonde and Trust Me She’s Just Your Type
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Best Halloween Costume? Possibly – VIDEO
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Sexy Games Offer You Some Sexy Playtime (NSFW)
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2012

22

Oct

stepLINKS of the Day

Marie-Eve Martinez here.

Well, I got my first piece of fan mail today and by mail I mean comment and by fan I mean someone who obviously hates me already.

Still, Jesus always told me while growing up that you’re nobody until someone starts hating on you so I guess that means I’ve finally hit it big and all my dreams are about to come true.

While I ponder what to do with my new found fame and success and all that’s lead me here, you should probably click these links.

PS Martin, if you’re reading this, I couldn’t have done it without you.


Well, Claudia Romani Got My Wrote
GO

25 Hottest Reality Stars Right Now
GO

Alicia Silverstone Wants You to Know that She Thinks These Vibrators Are Awesome
GO

OH You Know, Just an Everyday, Uphill Motorcycle Race. Wait, What? – VIDEO
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The 25 Hottest Female Halloween Costumes On TV Shows
GO

Petra Cubonova Rocks All Sorts of Lingerie and You Will Love It
GO

Here’s Some Stacy Keibler, Just Because
GO

Leila Will Have You Thinking Dirty Thoughts (NSFW)
GO

Layla Rose Has Miraculous Proportions All Right (SEMI NSFW)
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Free Cam Shows, Have Yourself Some Fun
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Watching Ashley is Action is Hypnotic (SEMI NSFW)
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For $1,200 Women Can Be Guaranteed an Orgasm with ‘G-Shot’ Injection
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Brunette Babe is Bored and She Will Have to Keep Herself Busy Somehow (NSFW)
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Looking Good Sweetheart
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These Sexy Games ARe Super Fun and Super NSFW
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If Every Girl Ironed Nude Like Bryci, More Guys Would Want to Get Married (NSFW)
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Sisie Feldman is the Former Wife of Corey Feldmen and She’s Naked For Playboy (NSFW)
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Everyone Deserves to be a Part of a Club, No? (SITE NSFW)
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Backstage At Biketoberfest Bikini Contest – VIDEO
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Ireland Baldwin Fips over her Cameltoe & Pokies
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You Know There is Something Wrong in the World When Kristen Stewart is Smiling
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Some Taylor Swift, Just Because
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Kate Moss Posese as a Topless Nun Because Fashion is Weird
GO

Alessandra Ambrosio Looks Fantastic Even in Sweat Pants
GO

Slutty Pic Dump of the Day
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Running in the Middle of a Spinning Amusement Park Ride is Never a Good Idea (SITE NSFW) – VIDEO
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Jersey Man High As A Kite On PCP Ate His Own Finger After Trying To Gnaw Off His Wrist In Jail Cell
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This Horney Lesbian Harem is Your Lesbian Sex Fantasy of the Day (NSFW)
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Sexy YouTube Spotlight: Sexy Shuffling & Shaking (SITE NSFW)
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Susan Holmes-McKagan is Kinda Trashy But I Like It
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This Web Cam Gal is Up to No Good (NSFW)
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Heidi Klum is Looking Thick
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Follow DSF On FACEBOOK and TWITTER

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From stepSMUT!! NSFW!
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America’s Got Whores, That’s For SURE (NSFW)
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Cory Kennedy Deep Throat Insanity (NSFW)
GO

My Favorite Thing in Life is Girls Naked on the Internet…..
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Some Naked Celebrities….For You…
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Sex Toy of the Day
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Visit our stepFORUM for some Good Times…

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Follow Me On INSTAGRAM MY USERNAME IS @DRUNKENSTEPFATHERDOTCOM

Posted in:stepLINKS

2012

22

Oct

Elisabetta Canalis Bikini Pic for Instagram of the DAy

You know what happens when you date George Clooney and all of a sudden become relevant….or at least relevant enough to be on Dancing with the Stars…despite having never been a star…but instead a vagina to a star for less than a year….people forget you exist and you are forced to produce your own sexy pics…for social networking…hoping another A or even B lister will come your way so that you can film a sex tape people will actually watch…and I am okay with that but only cuz desperation excites me.

Posted in:Elisabetta Canalis

2012

22

Oct

Lais Ribeiro in Some Victoria’s Secret Lingerie Catalog Pics of the Day


Lais Ribeiro is a Brazilian 20 year old model for Victoria’s Secret who I guess they are training to be the next Adriana Lima now that Adriana Lima is old, thick and a mom, cuz that’s what her Catholic anti-contraception did to her….and she is fucking amazing….

All ethnic looking, with a ridiculous body, ready to take the fuck over….and here is a gallery of a bunch of her pics…cuz I’m on my way to a jungle to find my own girls who look like this to recruit to my harem….

I am sure we’ll be seeing a lot more of her, she’s new blood to an old, played out, photoshopped out nipple and vagina lip for boring concept, catalog pics that make billions and I’m welcoming her with open arms…just as soon as I let go of my dick.

Posted in:Lais Ribeiro

2012

22

Oct

Kris Jenner Instagram Sort of Nipslip of the Day

Marie-Eve Martinez here.

Kris Jenner disgusts me and not because of the way she looks – she’s actually pretty fit overall for a lady her age – but because she will stop at nothing to exploit every member of her family any chance she gets. I’d like to say I think it’s all in the name of a pay check but for her and Kim especially I’m really starting to think these bitches do most of this shit for the attention because they are worthless and save for their stupid TV show, have nothing going for them but the way they look .

You don’t get paid for posting pics of yourself on Instagram slipping nipples, for instance.

The craziest part about the Kardashians is the way the media eats these people up – even Oprah Winfrey and Barbara Walters for god sakes – which is pretty fucking funny if you think about it because we live in a North American society where the sex industry is frowned upon for the most part by the general public but if parents want to go ahead and pimp their own children by (alledgedly)  marketing their sex tape an using it to negotiate a television deal, they get featured on TV specials. Seriously what the fuck is going on?

I’d say I can’t wait til Bruce Jenner dumps this cunt’s ass  – Brusce Jenner seems alright – but I’m sure she will just find a way to make another few million dollars off of it and if I know this bitch at all she’s probably consulted with producers already regarding her spin-off divorce solo show. You know, just in case.

 

 

Posted in:Uncategorized

2012

22

Oct

Michael Lohan Sells Out His Daughter Again of the Day

 

Marie-Eve Martinez Here

So according to Jesus, he somehow got a free trip to Central America through a friend, but for all I know that could mean he’s hanging out with a Nicaraguan bar maid he met over the weekend after winning big at video lottery. In my family, sometimes it’s better not to ask questions especially when they are questions you may not be prepared to hear the answer to.

Still, when he asks me to help out I do so here I am.

Lindsay Lohan’s father is talking to the media again and although I think Lohan is in self-denial about the way she continually sabotages her life and puts the blame on anyone else but her part of me always feels bad for this girl. Still, the fact of the matter is Lindsay Lohan, as gorgeous as she once was and as great as she was in Mean Girls, is not Robert Downey Jr and is never going to be able to realize the talent she could be is way more valuable than any of the people, nightclubs or celebrity status she thinks she may have.

It’s times like this I wish her and I were friends, not because I have any interest in hanging out with a famous person but because at this point the only way this girl is going to her shit together is if she ditches Hollywood entirely and basically everyone in her life and that includes her “family”…And the terrible part of that is I’m probably as far as it comes from normal and well adjusted but compared to the scum that this girl is surrounded with on a daily basis, hanging out with somebody like me would be the equivalent of spending an afternoon baking with June Cleaver.

In the end, her whole situation makes me reflective and thankful for my own home and family life growing up. I may have grown up with a drunk by 2pm step-father who never bought grocerys, borrowed money off me from time to time and hit on my friends but at the end of the day at least I knew he had my back and always has my back  and wouldn’t sell me out any chance he could get like this girl’s parents seem to do on a weekly fucking basis.

Here’s the video:

Posted in:Linday Lohan

2012

22

Oct

Diane Kruger Sexes it up for Glamour Spain November of the Day


Practically 40 year old….practically married to Dawson Creek….totally German…..Diane Kruger…is doing the fucking rounds…last week I POSTED HER PANTSLESS FOR A FASHION MAGAZINE ….and now she’s doin’ this…almost dominatrix….almost biker…with a Glamour Tattoo on her tit like she’s some kind of cheap whore at at Zumba class….all showing off ehr middle aged body…and reminding us all of all the fun Germany has to offer…like hard pragmatic women…who will fist you if asked…I mean…when they aren’t shitting on your face….

I wonder if German scat references when talking about German models, turned actors, turned old….will ever get boring…probably not as long as she’s dating bitchy teen heart throbs from the late 90s.

Posted in:Diane Kruger

2012

22

Oct

Taylor Swift Legs for Ellen of the Day

Taylor Swift rockin the mic like it was 18 year old Kennedy cock…..while Ellen fists herself in the corner…

I find nothing hot or erotic or sexy about Taylor Swift. Maybe I’ve been in this staring a girls on the internet game too fucking long and nothing turns me on…or maybe I just have expectations out of girls…and being skinny, or showing some leg isn’t enough to get me hard….I need shit up on the cerebral level…I need a bitch to mind fuck me…not just make me angry with how boring she is…or how annoying her songs are….I know that Taylor Swift’s mission in life is to make 100s of millions of dollars and not to give me boners….her boner giving is reserved for 18 year old society boys with a bootlegging and corrupt political family history…and even being that kind of pervert…or the kind of pervert you know licked John Mayer’s asshole while jerking off…just doesn’t do it…cuz she hides all that amazing behavior behind a good Christian girl…and unless the girl is a good Christian girl I am corrupting…and not a corrupt girl pretending to be a good Christian girl for money…my dick remains flacid….

But here she is on Ellen and you know Ellen’s pussy was dripping for this shit….she had to change her boxer briefs….cuz anytime a girl rocks a phallus that doesn’t look like a penis…cuz penis is the enemy in her world…she gets excited…especially when said girl is dressed like a naughty secretary…Ellen’s favorite.

Posted in:Taylor Swift