DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2012

20

Jan

Rihanna Bikini Hustle of the Day

I appreciate that Rihanna is being her own paparazzi….cuz the paparzzi fucking suck and the more these famous bitches promote themselves through hot pics…giving them the smut for free….the happier I am as a guy with a blog…cuz I’m not about to pay a motherfucker for this shit….

I guess what I’m saying here is Thanks Rihanna for being so cool….keep up the half naked pics…cuz they make me happy and it is all about me…

But seriously – bitch needs to update her camera – she’s worse than my at taking pics…and she could have all the free cameras she desires…but instead chooses her free phone she got on contract back in barbados or some shit…who cares

NOW HERE ARE THE PAPARZZI PICS OF THIS BITCH IN THIS BIKINI

Posted in:Rihanna

2012

19

Jan

Elsa Pataky Pregnant Bikini Pictures of the Day

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Nothing like a pregnant chick on a waterslide….to get me excited that she may slip up, lose the baby and thus save her vagina…leading me to believe if I was a superhero, that’d be by quest…vagina saver thru miscarriage enducer…

I feel like this post makes my one female reader happy, but that’s just cuz she had a botched abortion and can’t have babies of her own, so she looks at pregnant chicks as the devil mocking her inadequacies…but it probably upsets all the other girls….cuz I’m a horrible horrible man…

That said, here’s preggers Elsa Pataky in a bikini…

Posted in:Elsa Pataky

2012

19

Jan

Victoria’s Secret Swim 2012 Cock Tease Video of the Day

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Why do these fuckers at Victoria’s Secret gotta fuck with me like this…they got me by the fucking balls fuck…I hate their corporate monster ways…I hate endorsing their campaigns for free…all because there are hot bitches in bikinis seducing me….it’s such an easy marketing hustle…get hot pussy, make them celebs so people care about them, get them half naked often so people keep talking about them…and it makes me hate myself as much as I like looking at the half naked bitches…

So here’s Some teaser….half a million people have already seen…

Here’s Some Candice….straight from South Africa reminding us to cum in africa but never let africa cum in you…..HIV rules of wisdom…

Posted in:Victoria's Secret

2012

19

Jan

Vanessa Hudgens Bare Foot for the Fetishists of the Day

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I don’t do enough foot fetish content on stepfather…especially not foot fetish content of feet with stupid fucking tattoos on their feet…you know cuz song lyrics tattoos are up there with chinese symbols in stupid ..so here’s Vanessa dabbling with foot fetish porn, since she’s already produced kiddie porn and self shot camera phone porn….she’s so versatile…

Here she is in some halter top shit that I love even though I hate her…is fucking hot…all bra and titties and ankles oh my…

Posted in:Vanessa Hudgens

2012

19

Jan

Eva Mendes Street Walking of the Day

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Shouldn’t this bitch be on set somewhere showing off her great tits as the token hispanic who gets naked in movies and shows off her great tits…what’s this walking on the street, talking on her phone all about…not to mention she’s dressed like a fucking farmer’s daughter, and not the good kind, out to milk the fucking cows like a prairie bitch…who just got kicked in the face by a mule…

Posted in:Eva Mendes

2012

19

Jan

Chloe Sevigny Slutty yet Ugly for Interview Magazine of the Day

4 Comments »

Remember Chloe Sevigny? She was an actor once…but that was ruined when she started sucking Vincent Gallo dick and taking his load in his movie Brown Bunny…something I assume was her last role…but I’m too lazy to find out…

I never really got her appeal, people thought she was this fashion icon, I just found her unattractive. She pulled the whole New York hipster shit, hanging with artists and the whole thing was way too annoying….and full of shit for me…

But here she is – decades after being the AIDS bitch in kids…looking like she may have AIDS, or at least a sex change, and for some reason I’m posting it….maybe I’m into AIDSed up Trannies…

Posted in:Chloe Sevigny

2012

19

Jan

stepNEWS of the Day

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I love the fucking news…it’s amazing…hilarious and filled with idiots…but you don’t have to take my word for that…

Mom Accused of Offering Pawn Shop Worker Sex For Computer
A Michigan mother could face some serious charges. She’s accused of offering herself and her young daughter for sex in exchange for a $25 pawn extension on a laptop.

Video: Teen Beaten at Brooklyn School
The parents of one middle school student at I.S. 171 in Bushwick, Brooklyn, are agonizing over whether they should send their daughter back to the school where she’s been beaten up twice by the same bully.

Body spent days in theater restroom
DENVER â€” Family members are waiting for answers about how a 66-year-old Colorado man’s body went unnoticed in a locked movie theater restroom for about five days after he died there.

Woman Used Red Nail Polish As Blood To Get Husband Arrested
A Pennsylvania woman painted her face with red nail polish and lied to police about being assaulted by her husband in order to get him arrested.

Panhandler Kidnaps Colorado Woman, Forces Her To Smoke Drugs
A Colorado woman offered money to a panhandler who kidnapped her at gunpoint and forced her to inhale a drug he was smoking.

Business owner accused of being peeping tom
A Swansea, Massachusetts business owner is facing charges after an employee allegedly discovered that he had planted a covert camera in the bathroom.

Posted in:stepNEWS

2012

19

Jan

Julianne Moore Makes Cowboy Faces of the Day

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I don’t know about you…but I’ve jerked off to Julianne Moore at least once….I don’t think it was her red pubic haired pussy in a Robert Altman movie a long time ago..or if it was her tits in every movie she’s been in since…or if it was just that lesbian mom love affair with AMANDA SEYFRIED FUCKING HARD IN CHLOE ….but I do know that these pics of her doing some cowboy face are her at her fucking hottest….I just hope this is the face she makes when she cums….or gets cummed on….that’s what I’ll be thinking about while touching myself to these later…

Posted in:Julianne Moore

2012

19

Jan

Coleen Rooney Still Dumpy in a Bikini of the Day

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Coleen Rooney, the WAG who I assume trapped her man when they were in high school, before he was a famous soccer player, by telling him how if he ever gets rich and famous, those girls will just want him for his fame and money, while she was in it for the long haul and loves him for him, in what was probably one of the biggest gambles in her life that worked out for her…..I mean other than putting on this bikini…she’s a dump and that’s risky…it can go any way….

That said, she reminds me of this girl who got pregnant from sitting in a hot tub, never knowing who the father was, but that may have just been a lie she told us to justify illegit black kid with no daddy she brought back in her uterus from her all inclusive trip….they have the same dumpy ass I am sure black dudes everywhere would love if that white meat ever got close enough….

Either way here are the pics…

Posted in:Coleen Rooney

2012

19

Jan

Marg Helgenberger and Some CSI Armpit of the Day

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Marg Helgenberger is some CSI star who just quit CSI because I assume she doesn’t want to by typecast, even though she’s been on the shit for what must feel like 2 decades and is only known for being on the shit…and only matters cuz of the shit…and can only afford her lavish lifestyle cus of the shit…leaving her with a blank slate of career options….at least in her mind….when in reality all she has to look forward to is Dancing with the Stars…which in her defense is probably a bigger show that CSI any day….you just don’t really get paid to be on it and it pretty much leads to no where….lots to look forward to while I look at her armpit and imagine smelling it, sucking it, and fucking it…cuz other lady parts are so played out and mainstream…

Posted in:Marg Helgenberger