I kinda love Paz De La Huerta or PAZ dela Huerta depending on your socio economic background….and I’m disappointed she’s been kicked off Boardwalk Empire….because watching her naked….all 1920s hipster bush and great tits exposed in some of the best nudity on TV but the good news is that she’s always fucking naked…from previous shoots with her exposed asshole….to other movies…she knows she’s a good fucking thing….so this Flaunt magazine video might as well be fashion porn…or maybe all fashion might as well be considered porn…..cuz I can jerk off to it…but more importantly….it might as well be considered Paz De La Huerta’s not giving up or giving in to the rejection from her biggest gig….and I love it. Titties fucking everywhere.
There is a few thing I like to see when I leave my house during the day….one is women who are too old to be wearing leggings or tights wearing leggings or tights…you know cuz you know they think they have the body that can handle tights…all trying to stay young and hot…and the other is women who wear tights or leggings that are one or two sizes too small…cuz when you think you’re hot and tight bodied…the last thing you want to do is admit to being a medium…thus squeezing into a small or x-small….like you were still 16….leading to fabric so stretched out it becomes a fucking sheer might as well not be rocking pants at all situation….it’s even better when bitch wears pink underwear….to really draw attention to herself….
So V Magazine is prepping us with this preview…for what is going to be a very fucking busty shoot with Kate Upton who is at the top of her game and taking it all in because she knows that one day soon her metabolism is going to slow down…her gut and ass are going to catch up with her tits and starving herself and working out won’t have a fucking chance….cuz that’s what becoming a woman going, all fertile and post-puberty is all about….being this bust at 19, evn with all the hormones in the food will end in disaster…but disaster hasn’t struck yet, so think of this as sipping a cocktail on the beach in Haiti a few months before the earthquake…if you know what I mean….if you don’t…then let me put it this way….disaster is coming…so enjoy this while it fucking lasts…
Megan Fox may not be acting all that much anymore…and her decision to sympathise with her kidnapper like she was Patty Hearst, only to take it to another level of criminal, by marrying the fucker….who we can understand she had a crush on growing up, and who we can understand has a big dick that was a novelty to fuck, but that we can’t understand why a bitch at her prime would fuck up her image to such an extreme that no one wanted to touch her…all to make a jealous failure from 90210 feel secure…while she shoulda been out fucking A-Listers and really securing her fucking future…so that she wouldn’t have to do model jobs for Korean brands you never heard of….you know bottom feeding to maintain a lifestyle…cuz sometimes major life decisions can fuck you up the ass….
If you’ve seen this clip of KIM KARDASHIAN SUCKING BLACK DICK TO BECOME THE FAMOUS TWAT SHE IS TODAY…thanks to her mother’s encouragement….her spoiled brat hunger for money and to be the center of attention….then you may know that the black dick she’s sucking was rumored to be fucking Whitney Houston leading me to think that maybe the drowning…with the help of Paris Hilton….who has the master key of all Hilton hotel rooms….which coincidentally is where Whitney drowned….and where later that day Kim Kardashian brought out huge cleavage and her ethnic face….for the cameras and a Britney Spears photo opportunity….it only makes sense she fucking did it…..at the scene of the crime, angry Whitney was into her man, only to try to steal some of the attention from Whitney to shine the bright lights and cameras on her….it’s an egotistical, narcissistic, Kim Kardashian perfect murder….
Here are her tits celebrating her getting away with it.
I just watched the Grammy’s so I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that they photoshopped 74 pounds off her….
See I get that Adele is a talent, I have ears…I hear it…but when she performs I wish I didn’t have eyes…I wish I was Stevie Wonder up in here…because as a hater of fat chicks…all I could wonder is how much soft serve ice cream she already ate out of her Grammy within the first hour of having it….
I’m judgemental and feel there is an importance in giving women a negative body image in order to lower their self esteem as well as encourage their fitness and starvation as to not be fat…all while getting me laid….
It’s simple logic….and here is Grammy star winner Adele’s simple cleavage….probably the highlight of her body….possibly the reason her boyfriend dumped her to inspire her award winning album….who cares…
“Wasn’t she the girl who could sing high pitched or something”….it pretty much the words of genius that came out of Coco’s hooker/stripper mouth when asked about Whitney at the Grammy’s….
I didn’t think she was the brain…she’s more of the ridiculous tits and ass who doesn’t annoy me, because she embraces her life and realizes she’s a novelty act who looks like a novelty toy….pretty much a clown and from my experiece, you should never hate on a clown…or they will MOLEST YOUR CHILDREN
Either way, here are her tits in Vegas…where she belongs…cuz it houses many escorts, showgirls, and washed up pussy who think they are living the dream….and she’s wearing a hot dress..
I hate award shows….especially ones used as a jerk off fest for the 15 songs we hear non stop on the radio all fucking year to the point we want to rip out the throats of the cunts being thrown down our ears….but I got sucked into watching a few minutes of the shit…only to be reminded that this shit is not relevant anymore…it’s a dated system that doesn’t reflect what any actual music lover acually loves….likes here or even respects…it was a horrible miserbale joke….
Firstly shit was morbid as shit….from memorials…to Whitney shoutouts…to L.L. Cool J shoving his religion down all our throats by making us pray….which to me was beyond fucking offensive…preacher fucking J while vapid celebs who only care abou themselves pretended to care…
Then it celebrated women beaters…it remained a jerk off fest…that merged shit artists by linking them up with each other shit artists….in horrible collabs…it offended me at my core….and the only thing I liked was Taylor Swift on the banjo cuz I fucking love banjos…
I also liked that the world is forgetting gaga – which is nice
and that Rihanna actually brought the most hotness and it worked for me…
and that Katy Perry wore tight clothes showing off her dumpy body and annoyingness in Performance targeted at speaking to her recent divorce cuz she knows you gottta milk it…..
The pics….
Then there was Paris Hilton threatening us all with a new album…happy someone finally cares enough to talk to her….hysterically remiding us that LMFAO are little rich twats from Beverly Hills….
And The fact remains….Ryan Seacrest is a twat….while some Deadmaus was wearing Skrillex’s phone number becuase I guess it is battle of the over-hyped college scene DJs who make too much fucking money and get too much fucking pussy….even if this kinda publicity stunt is actually pretty fucking funny if legit….
Jesse J was there….
Kate Beckinsale…..was there…..
Whitney Houston wasn’t there….Who gives a fuck….people were asking me to rip apart Nicki Minaj…even though she has big fat chick tits and my penis is too small to even touch the edges of her nasty twat…but I feel her performance….the high school drama class performance…did a good job humiliating the bitch for being a lady gaga attempt at controversy pulled off worse than Lady Gaga does it…not to mention she was hiding her tit. The one redeeming quality her college theater club ass has…
This guy’s got it all figured out….even though it’s a little gay….
Here’s some links while I recover from the 15 minutes of the Grammy awards I watched that made me angry that it exists….it is totally irrelevant…it isn’t what it used to be….and the people they honor are not talented, but just contrived shit..I’m talking to you Nicki Minaj….
WHITNEY HOUSTON is dead….the day before the grammy’s…..shocking….I am pretty sure she died years ago….but I guess deatht only counts when you’re heart stops beating…the cause of death is unkown…but I”m gonna say it had something to do with being a tormented addict…so whether her heart went out, or she finally killed herself, it is safe to say it wasn’t natural causes or complications from plastic surgery, or car accident, or murder…I’m already over it. Would have been more fun if this was an RIP Lohan or really anyone but Whitney post….
The other day I asked for a natural disaster or global tragedy or celebrity death because I am a sick person and the powers that be kinda pulled through today with the news of Whitney Houston’s death…why take a crackhead from us….
I can’t say I didn’t see this corpse of a woman and her tormented soul’s end coming the last decade…if anything she is a medical miracle who needs to be studied to learn how massive million dollar addiction took so long to knock her down…
And you know 48 is young to die…but at least she made her mark, made her music and left her legacy….something all the crackheads I know who died premature didn’t have the chance to do….
I am only sad cuz I love me some crackhead pussy….I will miss laughing at her crackhead behavior and trying to masturbate to her sweaty crackhead body and even cry to her Angelic song that is now actual angelic song when reflecting on all the lost love in y life… but the truth is we were out with the old on this bitch for a while now…this is no MJ death…she was ready to die and really trying to die for a long fucking time…the real tragedy in all this is that I didn’t get to fuck her like I was Bobby Brown…
Here is her last performance….2 Days Ago….
I have no sympathy for drug addicts…I just know it really gives us perspective how fragile a life is when you throw a million dollar drug addiction at it for the last decade…it also really gives perspective on how Kevin Costner has been a horrible bodyguard…..
Now we need to listen to all the memorial shit….but I think this homie does it best….
BONUS – if you want to see the last dick she had before dying fuck Kim Kardashian…. FOLLOW THIS LINK
As a journalist, I will keep on top of this story…digging for truths and all exclusives interviews and updates with hotel staff…friends…..keep checking in…
UPDATE: 10:15 – She’s still dead….
UPDATE: 10:29 – Still dead….
Update 10:39 – thinking about all the people who didn’t have a 10 year multi-million dollar drug addiction the last decade who died today….you know the mothers, fathers, kids with cancer, grandmothers, respectable people in the community….who didn’t spend 10-15 years killing themselves….
UPDATE: 10:41 – Just watched this performance at the beginning of her career….1986 Grammy’s…before she killed herself….
Update: 10:42 – Just googled Whitney Houston Fat
Updatee 10:46 – Looking for nudes….not necessarily of Whitney….but just found out she was a model as a kid………
Update 10:50 – Just watched this….and laughed…
Update 10:51 – Whitney Houston remains dead…and I think her ghost just knocked on my window….fuck…I hope I’m not gonna be haunted for life like she was…..
Update 10:53 – I’m totally over this Whitney Death….
Update 10:54 – I need to go get drunk and high like I was Whitney…cuz all this drunk and high talk is making me hungry to get drunk and high….from one addict to another….
Update 10:34 am (12 hours of not caring in)- She drowned to death probably because of prescription pills like Xanax…something I already assumed…because prescription pills is America’s epidemic.
Update 11:27 pm – After the Grammys…..where Jennifer Hudson performed for Whitney and L.L. imposed his religion on everyone by making them pray….leadiing to me making bad jokes about murdered families…
